It seems like they've been standing in each other's arms for ours. It felt right. It felt like home. Finally, they both found the missing piece of the puzzle, each other. They can't take their eyes off each other. They don't want to blink because they might be asleep, and this might not be real but it's real. He wants to make her pain go away; however, she'd allow him to do that. But he lets her take the lead.
"You shouldn't be here Fitz. You should be at home with your wife and son. I can handle what's going on in my marriage. It's not your burden to carry," Liv says as she tries to break from his embrace, but he won't let her go.
"He hit you and I don't really care what excuse he has for it. I am going to kill him or die trying. He hurt you, so he made it my problem," Fitz sharply. "And you and I have a lot to talk about."
"Fitz," she says softly, dropping her head.
"Livvie, just tell me what happened."
"Abby shouldn't have told you. I can't believe she did that," she says turning in his arms. He pulls her into him. Her head is resting on his chest. He tightens his grip around her waist. He kisses the top of her head.
"She did it because she loves you and she knows how much I love you."
"Please don't say that" she says sadly as she lets the tears fall.
"I'll never stop loving you. Please don't ask me too."
"Don't make this harder on me."
"If you want me to go, I'll respect your wishes, but I'll just be back," he answers resting his chin on her head.
"Of course, I don't want you to go but," her chest rises and lets out this breath she feels like she's been holding for 7 years.
He turns her around again, "There are things I need to tell you. I need you to listen. The air needs to be cleared."
She can see it in his eyes, the thing she thought they lost forever, the love. "He found my box," she says randomly.
Fitz looks confused but of course curious, "What box?"
"I should have told him from the beginning who you were and that we'd be working together. But I honestly thought if I quit, it would make things easier. But he found my box that I've kept all these years of us. I kept pictures of us, letters…things you given me…" she trails off in thought.
"You still have it," Fitz asks. His heart leaps a little at the thought that she never threw it away. "You still have Doux BeBe."
"I couldn't throw it away. As much as I tried to hate you, I couldn't throw it away," she admits.
"When I gave it to you, I meant every word I said." Liv drops her head. She knows deep down he's telling her the truth, but the hurt is still there. As if he can hear her thoughts, he says, "And deep down you know it. That's why you never threw any of it away."
Liv doesn't answer but she continues explaining. "He was in my office, waiting for me when I got home." She wants to tell him about the letter, but she can't. "One thing led to another, and we had words and before I knew it, I was slammed into a wall getting up after he hit me."
Fitz leads her to the sofa to sit down, "That son of a bitch. He could have killed you."
"I'm okay Fitz. It's doesn't hurt as bad as it looks."
"He's a 6'3 man and he's hitting on a woman a foot shorter than him. This is not okay."
"I should have told him the truth in the beginning. He didn't deserve to find out that way, even though he evaded my privacy," Liv says as she lifts herself up to sit up on her knees. He watches every move she makes which doesn't go unnoticed. She makes sure her robe is securely tied.
"Livvie don't make excuses for him hitting you. You know better," Fitz says.
"I am not making excuses for him. But a marriage deserves truth and honesty. I should have been honest with him the moment we saw each other," she explains.
Fitz thinks about his conversation earlier with Mellie, "I am sorry Mellie came to you. I didn't know she figured out who you were."
"She said her piece," Liv shrugs off.
"And you are right. We should have told them the moment we knew but…."
"But what?"
"I am about to tell you something and it's not going to make sense, but it will explain a lot of things. It filled in a lot of gaps for me," Fitz says.
"Like what!"
Fitz decides that talking around won't make it any worse than it already is. "I never slept with Mellie that weekend."
Liv looks up, more confused than ever. "What do you mean?"
"Our fathers and my lovely wife decided to play games with our lives, and they lied and manipulated both of us to do it."
Liv gets up, she starts pacing. A trait he picked up on early. "Fitz, this is not funny."
Fitz gets up, walking over to her, stopping her from pacing. "I wish I were telling you a great joke. But this is not a joke." She breaks away from him and starts pacing again, "Liv, calm down."
"You just told me, you never slept with Mellie. The reason you broke up with me and broke my heart was over a lie. A lie that my father took part in."
"If it's any consolation I don't think your father knew it was a lie. He believed what he was partaking in was the truth," Fitz explains.
"Now why are you excusing him?" Liv asks.
"I am not. I think that my father and my wife did what they needed to do to make it stick and since your father didn't want us together."
Liv just lets the tears fall, "Everything I did…because…," she says softly.
"You were hurt. I understand why you wanted nothing to do with me. I can't blame you," Fitz assures her.
"You don't understand Fitz. You don't understand how broken I was," Liv says.
He grabs her shoulders, pulling her to him, "I do understand how broken you were. I was broken too. I wanted to marry you. I wanted you to be my wife. I wanted us to have beautiful babies and live out our days together. They took that from us."
Liv flinches. The saying, my heart hurts, was never more real than it is right now for Olivia. Her heart is hurting. "What did they do?"
"I told you I didn't remember most of that night, just that I woke up in bed with Mellie and she was gloating about it being the best night of her life. She was so glad I told her I still loved her. Which I couldn't believe that but there I was naked in bed with her. It had to be true. Right?" He sighs.
"That's what that was that night," Liv says.
"What night?" Fitz asks.
"That night we made love before my graduation. The night we…." She stops herself. "I knew something was wrong and you just kept begging me to never leave you."
Fitz is lost in thought. He remembers that night like it was yesterday. They had never made love like they did that night. It was passionate, it was loving, and he felt like they connected on another level that night. He remembered his tears was not just for knowing he had to hurt her. It was because he knew that night, this was his soulmate. "I'll never forget making love to you that night. The way you made love to me. I feel like that night changed everything us."
Liv walks over to the window, "It certainly did."
"She took pictures, and my father gave them to your father. That's why I really came that weekend. I came to meet him. He told me to give you up or he'd show you those pictures. I begged him not to. I told him I'd give you up but let us have that last weekend together. I wouldn't breakup until after the graduation. I begged him to give me that," Fitz answers.
Liv turns around to look at him. The pain in his voice was too unbearable and looking at him was even worse. "I can't believe he did this. I can't believe it was more important for him to control my life than trust that I was old enough to make my own decisions."
He knows this is painful for her. He tries to ease it. "He loves you. He just wanted what was best for his baby."
"And what about," she starts angrily. She stops herself. She doesn't know if she can go down that road. Fitz walks over to her, and she steps back. "We lost so much."
He softly reaches out his hand to touch her face. "We did but I believe fate brought us back together for a reason. It's not too late."
She holds his hand to her face, "I should have trusted you and heard you out. You were trying to protect me."
"Yes, I was. I didn't want you to believe I would choose another woman over you. I didn't want you to believe that so I just breaking up with you the way I did, I thought would make it a little better." There's now tears in his eyes.
"I hurt you too Fitz and I don't know if I can ever forgive myself for that, "Liv says.
"There's nothing to forgive," Fitz says quickly. Liv looks at him unconvinced. "I shouldn't have tried to figure out what happened and told you what was going on. I hope you can forgive me."
"Fitz, you don't understand."
He moves closer to her, "I understand that I let you go and now you are back, and I want to fight for you."
"But Mellie and your son….and Russell."
"Russell lost any rights to you tonight."
"But Mellie and Teddy," she says again.
"I asked Mellie for a divorce tonight before I Abby called me. When I found out what she did, I didn't give her a choice but to agree to one. I was leaving her either way. Now I just need you to let him go Livvie. Don't do it for me. Do it for you because I am afraid," Fitz says worriedly.
"Afraid for what," Liv asks as she searches his eyes.
"I am afraid this time won't be the last and…I want you to tell me the truth," Fitz starts.
She starts to shiver. What truth is he asking her for? "The truth about what?"
"Was this the first time or not?"
"What?"
Fitz lifts his hand to her eye, "Was this the first time he hit you or has he done it before?"
Liv lets the tear fall, on to his hand. "This was the first time he ever hit me."
Fitz knows her as well as she knows him. He knows that's not the full story. "But…"
Now she's ashamed. It only happened one-time months ago and it never happened again. "He pushed me one time. That's it. I promise you."
She can see the disappointment in his eyes. She knows what questions are going through his head and he asks, "Why Livvie?"
"Why what?"
"Why would you stay knowing he had that potential?"
The truth is, she has no answer. She has no smart answer for it. She's a smart woman. An intelligent woman and she knows what abuse can look like. When she met Abby, Abby had just had a fight with her boyfriend, and he pushed her, and Liv just so happened to be there. She scared him off with a bat she carried in her car. He never came around again. "Because I hated myself and he came along when I need to feel more for myself than pity, hurt, and shame."
This broke Fitz's heart to hear. Why would she be ashamed herself? Why would she pity herself? "Baby, you are more than anyone deserves. He doesn't deserve you. The bastard got you when your guard was down."
"But I need you to understand why. I need you to understand why I wouldn't see you when you came to Italy. I need you to understand what all happened." She stops thinking about what Fitz went through to get to her. "How did you know I was in Italy?"
"Your mom. She told me and told me to never let your father find out. She knew how broken I was, and she knew how broken you were. I had to try something," Fitz explains. She walks over to the box, that's still sitting on the wet bar. She brings it over to the table and motions for him to sit with her and he does. "Is this the box?"
"Yes, she says, "As she pulls the letter out. "I wrote this letter because I was going to send it to you and to be honest, I was hoping that if I sent it you come to me and in a fairytale, we would have fixed what was wrong."
"I would have come to you. I would have given anything for you to forgive me," Fitz says softly.
"Remember, I was going to do my masters program in California close to you. I dropped out of the program after we broke up. I was devastated. And out of the clear blue my father got me into this 6-month program to study abroad in Italy. I wanted to forget everything, so I went, and the school let me enter the master's program when I got back." Fitz listened intently, hanging on to her every word. "I just couldn't be here then."
Fitz can see her hands are shaking. That she is worried sick about something. "It's okay Livvie. You can tell me. I'm not going anywhere. Not this time."
"You told me we needed to break up. My father kept reminding me that you breaking up with me was exactly what he was trying to protect me from. The white man has his fun, took away my virginity and he was gone on to the woman that would be deemed worthy in your world," Liv explains.
Fitz raises her hand to his lips. "You were my world. I was going to marry you and show you off. I didn't give a damn what people thought. You could have been purple, and I would have loved you anyway."
"I know that now, but it was hard to believe that then. I'm so sorry."
"Don't be sorry. You didn't play games with our lives. Our no so loved, loved ones did," Fitz says. Liv drops her head. He lifts her head, "I just need to know you believe that I never stopped loving you."
Instead of talking, she hands him the letter. Fitz looks at her as he opens the letter. He begins to read. He starts to read it out loud:
Fitz, I've been so angry with you and hating you…I guess loving you at the same time that emotions are all over the place. I hate what you did to us, what you did to me. Most of all, I hate that you made me go through something so terrible without you. I had to make one of the hardest decisions of my life without you. It nearly killed me. In some ways it did kill me. That night, in your hotel room when we made love, we made something so special. Something that I know would have been beautiful, but you didn't want me, you didn't want us. So, I did what I thought was best for me and for you, so we could go on with our lives.
He doesn't even finish the letter; he just looks at her. He knows what the letter is saying. He just looks at her with tears in his eyes, waiting for her to say it.
"I was 8 weeks pregnant," she says sadly.
"Liv," he shakes his head.
"I was 8 weeks pregnant, and I would be leaving for Italy in 4 weeks. I couldn't call you. I was afraid to call you."
He squeezes her hand, "Livvie."
"I didn't want to do it. I found out when I was 6 weeks. At first, I was so happy. I just wanted to tell you but then I remember everything, and I cried for a week. I didn't know what to do. I know what I didn't want to do. So, I called your dad, looking for you. I know you couldn't find because I changed my number and I moved out of the dorms. He told me you had gone on around the world trip with your new fiancé."
"What!" Fitz yells, jumping up from the table. "Mellie and I weren't engaged. Not even close."
"That's what he told me, and I assume that's the story he and my dad settled on because my dad kept saying, you had probably moved on." She can't tell what Fitz is thinking. His ears are red. She's quite sure she can see smoke blaring out of his ears, "Fitz, say something."
"They killed our baby," Fitz says as he turns to her.
Liv is shocked by his response, "I went through with it. It was me."
"Because you were lied to Livvie. I had already hurt you. You couldn't help but believe what they told you. I broke us and they killed us. They killed our baby."
"But….," Liv starts. He stops her, taking her by the hand and moving back to the sofa. They sit down, wrapped in each other's arms. "I'm sorry Fitz."
"I'm sorry you lost all faith in me and my love for you," Fitz responds. "Did it hurt?"
"It felt like I was moving in slow motion. I think I was emotionally hurting more than physically. I cried the entire time. I kept telling myself I was doing the right thing. Afterwards, I bought a teddy bear, a little brown one. I slept with it for weeks until I couldn't look at it anymore."
Fitz moves her hair from in front of her face. "I should have been there for you."
Liv looks up at her, "I understand if you hate me for what I did. Believe me, I hate myself."
He gets close to her ear, "Look at me," he whispers. She would be lying if it didn't send a warm chill through her body. Now was not the time to be thinking about sex but that voice was always one of her weaknesses with him. She looks up at him and those beautiful blue cerulean eyes. He puts his hand on her stomach, "I could never hate you. I love you too much."
She puts her hand on top of his, "I did want it. I wanted to hold on to something of yours so bad. But I was in no position to raise a child."
He gently rubs her stomach, "Livvie, I understand." He moves his hand, putting it on top of hers. "I'll grieve for what should have been but I'm not going to let them win. I am not going to let lies and misunderstandings take away our second chance."
"Do you believe this is our second chance?" She asks.
"I'll die on that hill believing that."
Liv laughs, "Don't die on me. I just got you back." He starts to laugh. She smiles at him.
"So, we are in this together. We move forward together."
There's an awkward silence. He's getting worried. "I'm scared."
They are now face to face, "It's okay to be scared but I won't let anything happen to you."
"What about your son? You have to think about him Fitz. I won't be the cause of you ruining your relationship with your son."
"My son and I are going to be fine. You let me worry about that home front. You need to deal with Russell. I don't want you around him alone anymore."
Liv smiles, "I am going to be fine Fitz. I think it is more than important for me to move out of the house. He can have it. I don't think I want to live around the corner from your wife anyway. And the house was always not my style. It's what he wanted."
"How did you know I was giving her the house?" Fitz tilts his head.
"Because I know you, you will want your son as comfortable as possible, even if that means giving her everything."
"You are right. But don't worry about me. There are other great gated communities around DC." She just gives him a look. He knows they aren't ready for that step. He doesn't want to rush her, and he wants to assure her. "I know we aren't ready to move in together. I just don't want you to worry about that."
She looks at the clock. It's almost 1am. "You should get home. You don't want your son missing you in the morning."
"My son is at a sleepover this weekend. He's going to the beach with one of his best friend's family. I am not particularly rushing to go home to argue with Mellie."
"Fitz."
"How about I stay here until you fall asleep? Then I'll go. I just want to make sure you are okay."
"Would you hold me?" She shakes herself, mentally scolding herself. "I shouldn't have asked you that.
He doesn't even entertain her backtracking. He engulfs her on his arms. "I'll hold you as long as you need me to. And I am hoping that is going to be forever."
She relishes in the feel of his arms around her. It's everything she remembers. She's never felt safer. But she knows there is so much they have to deal with. She looks up at him, "One step at a time."
"One step at a time." He reaches down, not knowing if it will be accepted. He plants a kiss on her lips. "You get some sleep." She's more tired than she realizes. Before she knows it, she falls asleep soundly in Fitz's arms. He holds her, remember all the times he had done before. Now here they are back together. He vows to her, while she sleeps that they are going have what was taken away from them.
It's the next morning. Liv wakes up in the bedroom suite. She looks around, the sun is peeking through the curtains. She looks around. She doesn't remember the last time she slept that peacefully. She is still in her robe but under the covers. She smiles, she knows it was all Fitz's doing. She assumes her put her to bed and left. She gets up, going to the bathroom. She washes her face and brushes her teeth. She checks the bruises which aren't as scary as they were last night. She knows she will be able to pack things in peace from the house with Russell away for the Game 7. She makes her way out of the bedroom and into the living room of the suite to find Fitz pouring coffee for him and tea for her. There's a spread of food on the table.
"Fitz, what are you still doing here?"
"Livvie, I told you I wasn't going anywhere."
She looks around at the sofa. It's obvious he slept there. "Good morning!"
"Good morning beautiful!" He opens the lid on the plate. "I think I still know you pretty well. You've got a yogurt parfait here drizzled with honey, scrambled eggs with wheat toast and bacon."
"You remembered," she smiles.
He walks over to her and kisses her forehead, "I remember everything about you." He pulls her chair out, for her to sit down. She sits. He reaches down and whispers in her ear, "I do mean everything."
He sits down and before he can open his lid, she says. "And I think I remember everything about you. You always liked 3 sunny side up eggs, 8 strips of bacon, home fries, with sourdough bread and grape jelly."
He doesn't answer. He just opens the plate. Sitting on the play is everything she just named. "Your memory serves."
She drinks a little of her tea, "I see I still need to work on your eating habits."
He knows they aren't there yet, but he wants her to remember. "My eating habits are the same for everything." He winks at her.
"Fitz," Liv says breathlessly.
"I know! I know. I'll behave," he winks. "How did you sleep?"
"Very well! I don't remember being moved."
"You were exhausted. I don't even know if you knew it." He looks at her face. "How is that?"
"It's better. I think the sting is not as bad," she says, taking a bite of her yogurt parfait. She looks over and sees that he's been going through the box. "Our history is in that box."
"You kept the rose that I gave you on our first date," he smiles.
"It was the perfect date. I wanted to always remember it. I couldn't tell you I had a Olitz box. I didn't want you to think I was creepy," she laughs.
"An Olitz box," Fitz shakes his head. "What is that?"
"Don't you watch television. Couples on televisions shows have names. Their names put together. We would have been, Olivia and Fitz, Olitz." She explains as she blushes.
"We are Olitz," He corrects. He reaches over and grazes her hand back and forth. "I don't think it's creepy at all. The fact that you've kept us safe all these years. It means everything to me."
"I couldn't part with it all."
He pulls out Doux Bebe. He lays it on the table. Liv stares at it. "I am going to put this on your finger again."
"Fitz let's not jump ahead of ourselves," she says.
"When I gave this to you the first time. I promised you something. Do you remember what it was?"
She stares at the ring and then back at him, "Of course I do."
They are both transported back to Valentine's Day, just a few months before everything fell apart.
Fitz and Liv are sitting at the top of the Spanish Steps having a special dinner picnic. He wanted to pick a spot that was off the beaten path but quiet and romantic.
"Fitz this is perfect," she smiles
"I wanted to surprise you with something different," he says as he feeds her one of the grapes.
"I am glad we didn't do a restaurant. Just you and me, the stars, and a landmark," she says cuddling more into his side.
"So, I get an A+," he asks kissing her forehead.
"You get a triple A." She kisses the side of his cheek.
"Can I ask you something?" He says seriously. She detects the seriousness in his voice.
"Of course, you can," she responds turning to face him.
"Do I make you happy?"
"Is this a trick question?" She laughs off.
"I'm serious. Do I make you happy?" He asks again.
She places a kiss on his lips, "You make me deliriously happy. I know my dad keeps saying I'm too young to know what love is, but I think I know. I feel so loved when I'm with you. I feel your love every time you touch me. Every time you look at me. I'm pretty sure that's what love is, and it makes me so happy."
"That's exactly how I feel and that's why I want to cement it," he says.
"Cement it! We can't write on the Spanish Steps. I am quite sure we will go to jail for destroying this piece of history," she jokes looking around.
"We can draw our names in a tree later with hearts. I am talking about making it official," Fitz explains.
She traces his lips with her finger and then places a grape in his mouth. He takes the grape and then grabs a hold to her finger in his mouth. "Stop it Fitz," she laughs. He stands up, reaching for her to stand up with him. "What are you doing?"
Fitz reaches into his pocket and pulls out this little box. He gets on one knee. Liv almost looks petrified. He decides to give her a little rope. "I know we can't get married right now but this is just as important."
Liv lets out a breath, "You scared me to death."
He reaches for her hand and give it a gentle kiss.
"Olivia Carolyn Pope I am so glad that I was so stupid that I needed a tutor, and that tutor was you." Liv rolls her eyes. "I needed to learn but I honestly learned more than what I expected. I learned about myself. I learned how to take things more seriously. I learned how to focus and focus on my goals. One of my goals will always be you. I don't ever want to lose you, so tonight, I am making you mine without question." He opens the box to the ring. Liv lets out a gasp. It's a beautiful ring that is exquisite in style but simple and delicate. "My Grandmother wore this ring for many years after Sr. gave it to her. On her deathbed, she gave it to me. She said I would find the woman that was meant to wear it and that I'd know in my soul. I know it in my soul that this is meant for you. You are meant for me. We are going to get married some day but until then, this is the promise. Will you wear it?"
Liv decides to play with him a little bit. She's already cried too much. "Fitz, I can't believe you did this."
"Livvie, that's not an answer."
"I didn't know I had to answer," she laughs.
"Come on here! I am on my knees here," Fitz says with pleading eyes.
"You are usually very successful there," she winks.
"I'll show you just how successful I am later," he winks back.
"Of course, I'll wear it," she answers finally.
Fitz slides it on her finger. "Future Mrs. Grant." He gets up, sealing it with a kiss that can only be described as soul stirring.
"Pope-Grant," she corrects.
He pulls her in to another kiss, "That's negotiable."
They both come out of the memory. "I'll never forget that day," Liv says.
"I meant what I said. We are going to fix this and live the life we are supposed to be living together."
"I want us to start over," Liv says.
"We will! I am going to take you out on date and wine and dine you. I'll make you fall in love with me all over again," he professes.
She gets up and places herself in his lap which surprises him. "I'm already in love with you," she seals with a kiss.
"I am already in love with you too," he smiles as his hand travels up her thigh. The kiss grows in intensity and passion. Their tongues are dueling, fighting for domination. They moan into each other as Fitz begins to untie her robe. He drops his lips on to her neck, starting to kiss down her neck, down in between her breasts. The robe falls to the floor. She's wearing only underwear. God he's glad he didn't know that last night. He takes a quick scan of her body, "You are beautiful."
"I can't believe you want to make love to me looking like I was just in a WWF matchup," Liv says.
Fitz looks at her, almost upset, "That's not funny."
"I know. I just…. you really do love me."
"I really do. I always have," he answers. She drops her head down again to kiss him. He caresses her ass, wanting that barrier gone as he begins to pull at her underwear.
Liv comes up for air, "Fitz we can't."
Fitz looks at her bewildered. "What?"
"You are still married. I am still married. We need to handle that first."
"We are both as good as divorced," Fitz says as he kisses her collarbone.
"But not yet. I want us to do this right."
Fitz drops his head in the crook of her neck, "You are right, but I want you so bad it hurts. I've missed you and God I've missed this," he says as he grazes her nipple with his fingertip.
Liv drops her head back, "Don't make this hard for me."
"You want to talk about hard." He looks down at his pants. Liv gets up. The chilly air of being away from his warmth hits her. He picks up the robe, getting up and helping her back into it. He engulfs her in his arms, "I want it to be right too."
"Can you drop me off at the house? Abby is going to meet me there. I am going to pack some more clothes."
"I am not dropping you off and leaving you there," Fitz says.
"He is out of town. Remember it's a Game 7. He won't be a problem. Plus, I need to do this for myself. Abby will call you if something happens."
Fitz makes her look him in the eye. "You better call me."
"I promise I will. Fitz you've been away from your home and wife all night," she reminds him.
"Okay, I'll go home but I will be back."
"Okay," she smiles.
Fitz waits while she showers and get dressed and they make their way to their houses. Liv gets out of the car. Liv stops Fitz from kissing her before she gets out. She walks up to the house and goes in. What she doesn't know is that someone is watching.
The person sends a text to Russell, She's home. Some guy just dropped her off. I'll keep watching.
What happens next?
