It always felt like no matter how much effort she put in and how hard she tries, Ritsuka Fujimaru thinks she's never good enough. Anything she does in life is never good enough, no matter how hard she really tries. Her best was never good enough, even if it always felt like she was doing more than 100%. All her effort, her struggles… It never meant anything, in the end. She could always try and try again, but she'd never succeed. There were simply so many people who were better than her in every aspect. And finally, when it feels like things are finally going her way, they suddenly don't and everything starts falling apart. All her efforts were in vain, were useless, because there were always people who would rise up above her.
This was especially true when she joined Chaldea.
What was I thinking, joining this organization? If I had simply never joined, none of this would have happened. If Team A were the ones to have dealt with all the Singularities, the Lostbelts would have never happened. There would be no Crypters, and the Earth would be safe and sound. If I had never joined Chaldea, or if I had been the one to have died in the explosion, the more competent Team A would have dealt with the matter swiftly, and with finesse. Look at what a third rate Mage such as myself has done for humanity. By saving the world, I also doomed all of humanity…
So much weight on her shoulders, for someone as young as herself. All of humanity was counting on her. With that kind of pressure on her heart, it was slowly killing her. No one knew that, not even Ritsuka herself. Erasing the Lostbelts for good was no easy task. It meant destroying the worlds and the people who lived in it. By committing genocide on these people, she was maybe saving her own people. What if she were killing people but this would all be for naught? The thought of that almost crippled her mind and fully broke her spirit.
What was I even thinking? Why would someone such as myself even join Chaldea in the first place? It's not like I even know basic Magecraft!
She joined on a whim, hoping to make some kind of a difference in the world. To find her place somewhere, and make her family proud. Ritsuka always felt like she was never enough for her parents, never doing enough to make them proud. Things sort of spiralled from there: she had fallen asleep during the first briefing, the explosion happened, and she became Humanity's Last Master. She sealed her fate with that fact, and that's what led to the Bleaching of the Earth. Simply by being the only Master present during the explosion, she made her contract with Mash and became a true Master. While the adventures they went through together were harrowing, traumatizing, and horrific, she ultimately had a good time meeting and fighting alongside the great Heroes of olden times. After saving the world, Ritsuka ultimately doomed it as well, just because she had unwillingly stolen the status as Master, Saviour of Humanity. Former members of Team A descended upon the Earth, along with their Trees of Emptiness, and then the world ended.
Erasing Lostbelt after Lostbelt was exhausting and just wrong, she knew that deep in her heart. But she now had the responsibility of saving Proper Human History. While destroying these pruned worlds was indeed very wrong, their ways of life are also quite wrong. Their ways of living were too stagnant, too foreign and was why they were ultimately not allowed to be made into proper history. In the end, it was never an easy decision. With 4 Lostbelts eliminated, Rituska and the remnants of Chaldea made their way to Atlantis.
That was when she met him.
He saved Director Goredolf from certain death at the hands of Demonic Beasts that were roaming around the temple. He was an awkward and shy, unorthodox Heroic Spirit. Always seen as flustered, nervous and embarrassed, Ritsuka found him quite endearing and adorable. The first time they spoke to one another, it was a sequence of hilarious and awkward dialogue. Since then, he stuck with the gang in helping them eliminate this Lostbelt. He is always seen close to Ritsuka, or even walks beside her trying to make small talk. His speech stumbles, his face reddens pretty much every time they speak. Pretty soon, they had grown quite close.
His name was Mandricardo.
The way Ritsuka saw it was that Mandricardo simply needed a friend. It was probably pretty difficult for him to make friends, so she tried her luck with him. She ended up finding out that they actually had a lot in common. This was on the night that he worked up the courage to go talk to her in her bedroom. The way she had healed Achilles after the fight. Ritsuka never needed to heal Servants after battles. Mandricardo had a feeling she was overexerting herself by the way she activated her healing Mystic Code with an almost forced smile on her face. After confirming with Da Vinci, he managed to build up the courage and confront her about it.
Ritsuka Fujimaru was his first friend and for Ritsuka, was the first time she managed to truly feel like herself, someone she can fully relate to. She found a kindred spirit, and she was determined to stay friends with him. Mandricardo consoled her and then he managed to finish his story before awkwardly bidding her goodnight, rushing out of her room clutching his chest when Ritsuka called him "buddy".
Everyone noticed how close they had grown over the course of their journey. Ritsuka let her guard down as she warmed up to Mandricardo. She thought that everything would be fine. This Lostbelt will definitely be a challenge, this one is quite the challenge unlike the other 4 but ultimately, she will succeed at taking the Tree of Emptiness down, and she will do so alongside her best friend at her side. They would shoot down Artemis, defeat Odysseus and Chiron, and then destroy Poseidon. Everything would be okay since her best friend would be right there with her.
But things weren't okay.
Odysseus has fallen as planned, but at the cost of Corday. In response to his death, Artemis was to shoot them all down. It was too soon for this, and everyone fled to Nemesis Island as fast as they could before her lasers could annihilate everyone. Orion still had to shoot her down. They weren't going down without a fight! Everything was falling apart, though. Orion had shot the first and it had pierced her armour and left her core exposed. When he tried shooting the second time, it initially went through but Artemis shot it down easily with another shot right after her initial one. Everyone was shocked. She would then start to fire her lasers consecutive times. They only had 2 arrows for this and at this point, the goddess was ready to shoot them down as many times as it was needed. By then, Orion's Spirit Origin was already destroyed. Everything was moving too fast for Ritsuka to comprehend. Hektor was then summoned in response to her desperate pleas. A series of unfortunate events start to play out: Hektor attempts to hurl Durindana at Artemis's incoming beam but perishes. With Hektor's blessing, Mandricardo picks up the spear from the ground and with Hektor's order, suddenly hugs Ritsuka.
"Huh?" She was already so out of it that she didn't process the hug at first. And after she does, she's confused at his sudden burst of affection. He tells her that he's got to go now, that he has to do this. He's been given the opportunity to finally wield the sword and unlock its true power. If nothing was done, they'd all die and Proper Human History would truly be over. She will never forget his words to her, and it struck something deep into her soul.
"I want to save my friend… I want to save you." He had said so confidently, his expression dead serious. There was no hesitation, and his voice wasn't shaking or anything like it usually does. He was eerily calm and confident. It was truly the first time he felt confident in his actions, and he was so sure about this decision. He truly did want to save his best friend. Friends help each other and he could finally prove himself useful, unlike in his life. But this wasn't about him, it was about Ritsuka. He just wants to help her and in response to his will, Durendal transforms into a sword.
"I hereby release its power, so that I may protect my friend!"
Ritsuka could only watch in both awe at her friend but also in horror at his actions and their implications as Mandricardo took the full force of Artemis's lasers. She could not scream, her voice had ceased to exist. She forgot how to breathe. Actually, her chest hurt. She could not breathe. She just watched with tears in her eyes as her friend was fried and evaporated, protecting everyone with Hektor's sword.
The rest of the journey was such a blur that Ritsuka mostly forgot what had happened. They finally breached Olympus but at what cost? The cost was too great, Ritsuka had lost her best friend. How could she celebrate her arrival to Olympus when her friend wasn't there with her?
This isn't fair, none of this is fair! I just want my best friend back! I want to see him again!
After a few days of recovery, Ritsuka went down to the summoning room. She figured it would be pretty good to have additional help as they would soon confront Krirschtaria and the Gods of Olympus. She did get a few new units, some she recognized from the past and when she thought she was done, there was one last Servant who decided to show up late to the party. Ritsuka waited, though she was pretty numb and dispassionate.
Until she saw the figure emerge from the bright light, materialize in front of her.
"Servant, answering your summoning. Nah, that ain't it." It seems like the Servant was chiding himself for such laid back introduction to their Master. That, and he just flat out failed to state who he was and why he had come. He thought that was inappropriate and decided to try again. "Rider, Mandricardo. Well, I'll be in your care, appropriately."
His mannerism, his embarrassed expression, the way he fidgeted nervously. There was no doubt about it, it was indeed Mandricardo. But before she could leap into his arms to give him a soul crushing hug, she suddenly realized that this version of him wouldn't remember their adventures together at all. He would not remember the important friendship that they had forged, and it crushed Ritsuka's soul.
That didn't stop Ritsuka from leaping into his arms anyway, her chest colliding into his face as she started sobbing and wailing.
"Whoa, what the…! Hey Master, are you okay?! Why are you crying?"
She promptly let go of him and rubbed at her eyes, sniffling. "I'm sorry, I'm just… I'm just so happy to see you." She stopped herself from saying 'again'.
His eyes widened in surprise. "Wait, for real? You're happy to see me?" Just to confirm, he pointed at himself and Ritsuka nodded her head vigorously. "Jeez, you're a strange one. Well anyway, I have a feeling we will get along quite well. I hope you take good care of me, Master." He was quite flustered as he said the last part.
Ritsuka laughed. "Of course I will!"
We can always be friends again. It probably won't be the same as when we first met but in the end, we'll be friends and that's all that matters.
Ritsuka eagerly grabbed his hand and pulled him inside where hopefully, they will eventually become the best of friends. Just like when they had first met. That was her only wish, from the bottom of her heart. Mandricardo was quite surprised by his Master's actions, and how eager and almost insistent she had seemed. There was something nagging in the back of his mind. The way she behaved, her kindness, that smile of hers... For now, he kept all those queries to himself and said nothing as his Master dragged him inside into the Command Room.
Have we met before...?
