Getting into the technicalities now, probably a pretty boring chapter overall but gotta set up the future chapters yanno
Finally, Harry and James were able to sit down and talk. Harry took out his notebook and flipped through it to get to the right pages, clearing his throat. "Alright, so this is a brief overview of some possible treatment options and avenues that may be relevant or need to be explored with you. These should not vary much regardless of who does your treatment, as our job as mind healers more or less use the same methods each time; to varying levels of depth and detail."
"Of course, you can rest assured that any insight gained is shared among us to help serve you better, however private or specific details regarding your treatment is confidential always. Still with me?" James nodded. He was initially a little antsy but leaned forward a little and paid close attention when Harry started explaining.
"Great," Harry nodded. "Feel free to jump in at any time if you need clarification or want to ask a question. Remember we are trying to tailor this as best as possible to your specific scenario, and making you familiar and comfortable with the process will also play a big part in ensuring a smooth process. Not to mention I'm sure you'll probably feel better knowing what you're going into as well."
"Makes sense," James commented, with an uncertain purse of his lips. Harry smiled encouragingly before launching into a detailed but brief introduction of the art of legilimency and how it will be the main focus of their treatments.
"Often people's… mindscapes, shall we call them, is a disorganized area bearing some semblance of familiarity to them. Some level of disorganization is perfectly normal. Think of it like a work desk; not always tidy but more often than not a form of organized chaos unique to each individual.
"Those who have experienced severe trauma or mental disturbance, however, will often be reflected in destruction, disarray or incomplete mindscapes. Here, mind healers can try to essentially "return order" by addressing the root issue." Glancing down at his notebook, Harry shifted and pushed up his glasses. "In your case, there will be multiple layers that need to be addressed; both concurrently and sequentially."
Looking up after a pause, Harry saw the trepidation and anxiousness in James' frame. "Would you like a piece of paper?"
"Huh?" blinked James.
"Perhaps you'd like to take some notes to look back on later," Harry offered. "Or even just to doodle on. This can be quite overwhelming, especially as a muggle – er, non-magical, sorry – and giving your hands something to do may be a good outlet for stress."
James was silent a moment longer before Harry huffed good-naturedly and flicked out his wand. He summoned a coffee table nearby, conjured a length of parchment and summoned a pen that almost smacked him in the head on its way over. With another twist of his wrist, he also conjured a glass of water for good measure.
"Holy cow," James had almost leapt off his seat when the table had slid over. He quickly willed his thudding heart to calm down. "That's never gonna get old." Harry chuckled in response.
"Please," Harry gestured meaningfully to the cup of water. "Shall we continue?"
James nodded, having taken a drink and calmed down slightly. "Yeah, thanks uh—Harry." Harry nodded in return.
"As I was saying, there are multiple different issues we will need to address. Firstly, your separation of self between 'James Barnes' and 'Winter Soldier'. This could take the form of anything from a separation of mindscapes to tearing and fusion of your mindscapes, depending on the level of differentiation you feel between the two."
"Second; your scattered and missing memories as a consequence of the forcible alterations to your mind. Thankfully, not an unusual issue for mind healers to deal with. This most often is represented by missing items or information or sections within your mindscape. We usually have to explore deeper into your psyche to draw out and restore these missing fragments."
"Third; the… 'programming' or 'brainwashing' you underwent. Again, we have a similar curse – that is very much illegal – that does something similar, however yours is a far longer-term than anything we've ever seen. This will likely be the hardest part as you will need to work through it carefully to extract any remnants whilst basically combing through each event carefully."
James' grip on the pen tightened, causing it to crack. He quickly loosened his grip and checked it for any damage, but luckily only found a minor crack along its outer shell. He obviously was not looking forward to... that. He had spent his time on the run trying to remember as much as he could about his real past, whilst simultaneously pushing out anything to do with his conditioning under HYDRA.
"Fourth," Harry continued after a short pause to allow James to gather his thoughts. "Melding your new mindscape together and finding a new equilibrium. This will be the last stage of your treatments, and follows what is expected to be an exceptional amount of mental strain that you will have been suffering over the past couple of decades."
"And—if it's not… possible?" asked James tiredly. At Harry's questioning look he elaborated, "what if even after all that I can't… I'm not the same as I was before?"
"Ah. That's where you are mistaken, James," Harry smiled gently. "You can't expect to be the same as before." Seeing James' despairing and resigned look, Harry got up and moved over to sit carefully next to James. "Nobody is ever the same as they were yesterday, or the day before that; and even more so a year before that. People change with every new day and experience."
"You won't be the 'James Barnes' of the early forties, because you learned what being in a war was like. Neither will you be the 'Sergeant Barnes' of the war, because you saw peeks and flashes of decades fly past. And you will not be the 'Winter Soldier', because you have already resolved to abandon that part of your life."
Harry reached over and laid a comforting hand on James' forearm, careful to see that he had no qualms about being touched. "The 'you' you will be after our treatments will simply be yet another phase of your life that will continue to evolve, adapt and change based on the choices and paths you will take in the future. Rather than fixating on returning to a past you were familiar with, isn't it more exciting to consider the person you can be next, and the endless opportunities that will pave the way there for you?"
James was staring, speechless, into Harry's startlingly green gaze. He had never thought of it in such a way. To him and those around him, it was always like playing defense. I would never have done that. Bucky wasn't like this. But here… Harry was saying he could make his present, instead of clinging to his past like a crutch and a shield. He was brought back to the present by Harry softly patting the back of his hand.
"Well, we'll get there eventually but try not to worry yourself over the end result and focus on the process, alright?" He stood up and turned to face a curious James. "There's one more thing I'd like to propose. It doesn't have any impact on your treatment, but may be useful to yield supplementary information."
"What is it?"
"I'd like to perform a comprehensive, full body diagnostic charm on you."
"Diagnostic?" James repeated. "What for?"
"Sometimes, particularly with muggles who do not yet have tools to pinpoint specific internal ailments, there can be another issue within the body that can also affect your mental state." Harry put a hand under his chin thoughtfully. "To give a crude example, say someone has a chronic illness that isn't serious enough but has symptoms that can make you think it's something else. Like heart palpitations or sudden shivers. It can have an effect on the mind when you don't know what's causing those things and the more you fixate on them the more the symptoms may exacerbate."
"But also, I read your file about the fact you were subjected to and exposed to unknown treatments or experimentation. Though you've apparently gained heightened senses and abilities for a muggle, it may be prudent to see if there are any lasting negative impacts on your body that could affect our treatments."
"Yeah… alright," conceded James. "How—does it hurt?"
"Not at all," Harry reassured, taking out his wand again. "Maybe a slight tingle or odd feeling sweeping over you, but definitely no pain."
"Uh, now?" James stared at Harry's wand and got up. "What should I do?"
Harry chuckled, "nothing." And with a simple flourish over James' form, the spell was done. Writing began to appear before Harry, glowing as if written in light and suspended in the air. Ever-curious, James got up and came closer to inspect the words while Harry hummed.
The information grew longer, and longer, and longer. Even Harry's brows were raising as the text that had started half a head taller than him was now continuing past his elbow in length. He summoned his notebook into his hand and began jotting down some key notes here and there.
James could not make heads or tails of the information, though he recognized a few anatomical and medical terms here and there. There seemed to be a mix of magical words used or perhaps referenced throughout the diagnostics that made it hard for him to decipher its meaning by himself.
"Interesting," Harry mumbled as he continued writing. However, his brows were also downturned in consternation as he surveyed the diagnosis. "Hmm… we may need to bring in Jidea and her team to consult further."
"Is it… that bad?" James asked carefully.
"Oh no," Harry shook his head. "Nothing particularly outside the scope of my expectations. There are a few interesting things to note that may actually be useful for your treatments though." He saw James' shoulders drop minutely in relief.
Snapping his notebook shut, Harry stood up so that he was face to face with James who was still lingering around the glowing words hanging in the air. "Alright James, what do you think about everything I've said so far? Any questions, concerns?"
James thought for a moment, "Honestly I'm way out of my depth here, doc." He sighed, running his hand through his hair but then getting it stuck on a knot. "I mean what you, and Shuri and everyone's been saying about magic and healing and all that… it just… sounds too good to be true, you know?"
Amused at the 'doc' slip, Harry nodded in understanding. "I understand. It can be hard to wrap your head around it. Even more so since I assume you'd already be shocked by just how advanced muggle technology has probably come since the era you grew up in."
"Yeah," James chuckled a little at that. "It's both… unbelievable and amazing. Here in Wakanda, especially. I just… I really want to do my best to get better. And I know that my best chance is to follow you and Shuri's leads. I mean Steve – my fri—er, Captain America – wouldn't have brought me here otherwise. I just hate feeling so… useless."
Harry put a hand on James' shoulder lightly, causing him to look up from where his gaze had dropped to the floor. "You're not, James. It's completely natural to feel helpless when it comes to something we can't control." The two men looked at each other for a moment before Harry smiled lopsidedly and James huffed and returned the smile.
"Thanks, doc," James reached up and gripped Harry's hand that was still on his shoulder.
Rolling his eyes, "I already said just call me Harry, James. You're not going to be one of those patients, are you?" The grin on James' face grew a little more at that. "Speaking of patients," Harry continued. "How do you feel about officially being mine?"
¬‿¬ get your head out of the gutter, reader. I know what some of you might be thinking there.
P.S. Harry really doesn't know much about the Avengers or most muggle things like that but rather than waste time asking unnecessary questions, he just goes with it. Unless it becomes relevant to his work. If we get far enough for Steve or other Avengers to visit, this'll become more evident.
