How can memories which bring boundless joy also bring unbearable pain? I wonder…


"Hello, my name is Nida and I am the captain of this ship. It is my pleasure to welcome you aboard our ship Balamb," said the man wearing a white uniform.

Squall clutched his head as he tried to remember where he had heard the names of Balamb and Nida before. Luna rubbed his arms gently, instinctively.

"Please make yourself at home. We pride ourselves on being the epitome of service. If you need anything, just alert our staff and we'll do anything to accommodate your needs," Nida added.

"Thank you, Captain Nida," Luna said as they entered the ship. It was a majestic ship with multiple floors and easily housing over a thousand people.

"Next stop, Altissia," announced Captain Nida.

They traveled up a set of stairs and through a landscaped area before proceeding to a security checkpoint at the inner gate.

Upon entering, they noticed that this ship had three floors. This luxury ship, Balamb, was an immense, futuristic-looking ship, with a chrome and blue finish.

As Squall and Luna approached the lobby, Luna wondered aloud, "This place is huge, where do you think our rooms are?"

"It should be over there," Leon responded autonomously, pointing at the northern corridor.

"How do you know?" She questioned as they approached an oversized directory and an elevator, which allows access to other floors.

"I… I don't know. I just do." He took a brief pause before continuing, "this layout feels very familiar to me. It's as if I've been here before, which I know is not possible."

The lobby was shaped like a ring and the first-floor sections branch off like spokes on a wheel.

Luna stayed quiet and gave him time to process it all.

He continued as if in a trance, "Following the lobby to the right, the southeastern corridor branching off from the ring leads to the library. Continuing up the lobby ring counter-clockwise, the eastern corridor leads to the training center. The northern corridor should lead to living quarters. The northwest corridor leads to the cafeteria. The western corridor leads to the quad, an open-air place for everyone to relax. And the southwest corridor leads to the infirmary."

Luna, who was trying to match the directory with what Squall was narrating, noted, "You are very close. The training center is where the gym is and the quad is where there are pools, water rides, and a viewing deck. Other than that, you were eerily accurate."

"What is going on?" He asked with a hint of concern in his voice. Once again, clutching his head.

"I don't know, but whatever it is, we will figure it out together," she reassured, gently squeezing his hand.

Squall took a deep breath and proposed, "Let's go to our rooms first, and then we can explore this place."

Squall couldn't help but look around with a sense of familiarity with this structure.

After getting fresh they decided to tour the ship.

The activity rooms were located on the second floor, circling the main elevator in a ring. These rooms offered a myriad of activities from the arcade, wall climbing, archery, fencing, cooking, and many more. Numerous shops and restaurants were located on the opposite side of the activity rooms. At the end of the corridor, a huge ballroom was located where various performances took place throughout the day. On the opposite end of the ballroom was the balcony which provided a breathtakingly scenic view. For as far as the eyes can see, it was nothing but clear blue water. It was hard to comprehend the vastness of the ocean as it seemed endless.

The third floor was reserved for staff quarters, the bridge, and an open-to-sky viewing deck. On the opposite side of the viewing deck was an infinity pool and a few water sports. There were also a few waterslides that descended to the quad on the first floor.

The bustling of people made the whole atmosphere come alive. Everywhere the eyes could see, people were enjoying themselves. Kids could be seen running around the deck. Adults and kids alike played in the pool and splashed water on each other. A few thrill-seekers were engaged in various water sports the ship had to offer. While some preferred to just relax with their drinks. The sounds of various laughter never seemed to die. All the struggles of the outside world seemed like a forgotten memory in this place.

"Do you think if we had a normal life, we would be enjoying ourselves like this?" Luna asked longingly.

Leon contemplated before answering, "Who said that we cannot enjoy here?"

"Well, for starters, I do not have the proper attire for any water-related activity," she pointed out.

"There are plenty of other things to do on this ship besides that," he countered.

"True. What would you like to do?" She asked courteously.

"Whatever. I am fine with anything." He replied with a shrug. "You pick."

"How about?" she tapped her chin while thinking. "Arcade! When I was little, there was an arcade in Tenebrae. Mom used to take Ravus and me there all the time. We used to have so much fun. But alas, it was burned down during Niflheim's attack. I've never been to an arcade since then."

"Arcade it is," he said, leading the way.

Luna's eyes lit with excitement as they entered the arcade.

"Wow, there are so many of them," Luna marveled at the number of games available in the arcade.

"Where should we start?"

"Over there! Let's start with the toss the ring."

Once they started playing the games, the time flew by. One thing that not many people knew about Luna was that she was very competitive. They played a variety of games such as whack a mole, hammer toss, mini basketball, bean bag toss, bike racing, shoot the target, water gun, go-cart, bumper cart, climb the wall, wheel of fortune, slot machines, and many more.

They must have been there for hours but it felt like minutes. They grabbed a quick bite from the nearest store available and continued their games. Luna did not miss the opportunity to take various photos of them having fun.

By five o'clock they had covered pretty much all the games they wanted to play. They had racked up enough points to redeem a decent gift from the gift shop.

"What are you going to get?" he asked looking around.

"I don't know. Let me take a look around," she said, marching ahead.

"Shopping with a girl is my least favorite activity," he muttered under his breath.

Leon had picked up what he wanted in less than three minutes. It was more than twenty minutes and Luna was still happy exploring everything available. Leon reluctantly ambled behind her with the lack of alternatives.

"You still haven't decided?" he asked, finally running out of patience.

"No, I am not sure what I should get," she replied, looking around.

'Just pick anything, woman. It's not like we will be lugging it all around when we get to Altissia,' he thought, instinctively facepalming.

After a few more minutes of exploring, Luna settled on four feet tall stuffed Moogle. Leon helped her carry it to her room.

As soon as they entered her room, Luna plopped down on the bed. Leon noticed that her breathing was shallow and laborious.

"Are you alright?" He asked with concern.

"I am fine. Just a little out of breath, that's all." She tried to downplay it.

"Now that you've mentioned it, I have noticed that you do get tired very quickly. Even during the arcade, you were often leaning against the wall or hunching whenever you thought I was not looking. Is everything okay?"

Suddenly, all the color from her face drained. What was she supposed to say? That her body was giving up? That she was closer to death with every passing day?

She did not want to burden Leon with her troubles so she tried to brush it off, "Has anyone ever told you that you worry too much?"

"Is my worrying not justified?" He pointed.

"Leon, I am just tired. That's all." She replied with a poker face. "If you don't mind, I'd like to take a nap and recharge. How about we meet in an hour for dinner?"

Leon nodded and exited the room.

'I am sorry, Leon, for not being honest with you,' she thought with a sigh of resignation before shutting her eyes and drifting to sleep.

Their next day was spent doing sporting activities such as indoor-surfing simulation, go-karting on deck, ziplining, obstacle course, and rock climbing. Leon had way more fun than Luna doing various physical activities.

Their third day was split between the waterpark and relaxing at the pool.

They, mainly Luna, decided to relax on the last day and not do anything strenuous. They took strolls around the ship and spent the rest of the time reading books they had borrowed from the library. Luna had drifted off to sleep while reading. Leon had noticed that she gets tired very quickly and sleeps often to recover. He was concerned for her health but every time he would bring up that topic, Luna would either avoid that conversation or downplay it.

Since Luna was sleeping and Leon was tired of reading, he decided to go for a quiet walk. By the time Luna woke up, Leon was nowhere to be found.

She had been looking for him for more than 45 minutes but he was nowhere to be found. She had methodically surveyed all the floors before returning to the first floor. Thinking that Leon might have gone for training in the gym, she went there to look for him. She was exhausted from all that walking so she sat down to catch her breath.

'Leon, where are you hiding?' She thought with resignation.

After regaining her energy, she was about to go look for Leon at another location when something caught her eye. From the corner of her eye, she noticed a silhouette matching Leon's profile on a secluded balcony. With every step, she affirmed her suspicion that it was Leon.

As she approached closer, she noticed Leon was looking at his phone and was smiling.

"So, this is where you were hiding?" She commented from some distance. It was a nice secluded balcony overlooking a beautiful ocean.

"Oh…" Her familiar voice registered in her brain. "Oh, sorry." He replied sheepishly.

"How did you even find this secret area?" Luan inquired.

"I…" He hesitated. "I don't know. It felt like my feet just carried me here on their own. It feels like I have been here before." He replied honestly.

"It's okay," She replied reassuringly, noticing Leon's uneasy reply. "Besides, I am more interested in knowing what you were so preoccupied with. I saw you looking at your phone and smiling. The Leon I know does not smile so easily."

"Oh, it's nothing. I was just looking at some of our old pictures," he replied with a hint of embarrassment.

"I want to see them too!" She stated before taking the phone from his hand.

But, before she could proceed, her stomach growled.

Suddenly, it dawned on Leon that it was already 7:45 p.m. "I am so sorry. I completely lost track of time here."

"Where are we going to eat? Did you make any reservations?" She asked, folding her arms.

"I am sorry, I did not," he replied, scratching his head.

"At least one of us was cognizant enough to make a reservation," she said with a teasing smile.

"You are the best. Let's go eat, I am hungry."

"So now, you are hungry?" She said with mock anger.

Luna and Leon made their way to the restaurant on the second floor. Upon entering, they were greeted by the attendant, "Welcome to the Lunatic Pandora."

"Hello. I have reservations for two," notified Luna.

"Sure, what is the name on the reservation?" asked the attendant.

"Ashelia B'nargin Dalmasca."

The attendant looked her up on the computer, "Ashelia B'nargin Dalmasca. Here it is."

"Please follow me," requested the attendant, and lead them through the maze of the crowd.

"This will be your private booth. Enjoy," the attendant waved them goodbye and returned to their station.

"Thank you," Luna replied, courteously. They sat opposite each other with the window to the endless ocean on one side and a bustling restaurant on the other. The booth partition on either side blocked out most of the prying eyes and gave them some seclusion.

'Wow, this looks like a fancy restaurant. And a private booth too.' Leon was impressed. It was easy for him to forget that he was traveling with an actual princess.

She observed Leon's facial expressions and could tell that he was thinking about things.

"What is it? I know you want to say something." She had become very good at reading him and sometimes it scared him.

"This is a very high-end restaurant. It would cost a fortune here." He stated his concern. This was the only paid restaurant on an all-inclusive cruise.

"After months of eating street food, don't you think we deserve at least one fancy meal together?" She proposed.

"I suppose, but—" Luna cut him off before he could continue, "This is my treat, so why don't you just relax and enjoy it?"

Leon nodded and took his seat.

"What would you like to eat?" she asked, handing him the menu.

Leon tried his best not to look at the price of each item but he struggled to control his wayward eyes.

Luna gently pulled away the menu from his hand, "Why don't I just read the menu to you and you pick what you would like to eat from it?"

Leon had decided to get his customary soup and left the rest of the choices up to Luna. He was one of the least picky eaters Luna had ever met.

Once their order was placed their eternal wait for the food began.

Leon glanced out from the open window and saw small waves come and go, rising and falling rhythmically. It generated a peaceful hum adding to the calmness of the environment. The waves scattered the gentle moonlight and distorted the reflection of the moon in the ocean water. The cool ocean breeze gently kissed the skin and played with the hair.

While Leon found his serenity looking at the ocean, Luna found her in him. Their booth was softly lit by a chandelier that housed candles instead of bulbs. The candle stand mounted on each booth partition provided an ambiance light to the surroundings. In the middle of their table stood a candle stand with a heart carved in it. The candle on top danced with the gentle breeze. As Leon was looking out towards the sea, half of his face glowed amber from the light of the candles, while the other half radiated pale blue from the moonlight. The fact that he looked at peace made for a mesmerizing view for Luna.

Leon noticed a pair of eyes on him and glanced at the perpetrator who quickly averted her eyes.

"What?" He inquired with a raised eyebrow.

"Nothing," she tried to play it off cool.

"You were looking at me," he pointed.

"So?" She asked with a mischievous smile which somehow made Leon very flustered.

"Whatever," he replied nonchalantly and folded his arms, which made Luna laugh.

Once her laughter subsided, she stood and came around the table and sat next to Leon.

"Hand it over?" She demanded.

"What?" He asked, visibly confused.

"Your phone. I want to see our pictures."

Leon gave her phone and she eagerly started scrolling through their pictures. The first picture together was taken by later Dr. K. She fondly remembered the kindhearted doctor who sacrificed herself to protect her. Her eyes were getting watery looking at the picture. Noticing Luna's expression, Leon intervened and swiped the photo. He took the lead in perusing their pictures.

After looking through some pictures of their last dinner in Lestallum, he paused on one of their pictures by the fountain. The photo perfectly captured Luna's shocked look with ice cream on her nose.

"Hey, I told you to delete that," she said, elbowing Leon.

"How could I? This is precious," he replied with a rare chuckle.

Luna unconsciously scooted closer to Leon as they continued reliving their adventures.

"Hey, remember this picture in the snow in the field of sylleblossoms at my garden in Fenestala Manor?" she spoke with delight.

"Of course, it is one of my favorite memories," he admitted.

Their serenity was broken by the waiter bringing their appetizers. The aroma of their soup and freshly baked bread was very inviting.

"Umm, this smells so good," Luna exclaimed.

"Let's eat."

"Just like that? You are not going to feed me as you did back in Lestallum?"

"You can't be serious. There are people around us!" He exclaimed.

"Oh, come on, for old time's sake. Who knows if we'll ever get this chance again?" Both of their hearts sank the moment those words came out of her mouth. Their future was not something they wanted to think about.

Leon stirred the soup with the spoon, took a spoonful of it, and gently blew on it to cool it. He then raised the spoon to her mouth and she happily obliged.

They continued their dinner, recalling their fond memories of their time together. As they were about to finish dinner a strong breeze gushed through the open window. The candle in the middle struggled against the wind.

Suddenly, Leon put his right hand around the flame to prevent the wind from directly reaching it. Within a second Luna placed her right-hand opposite Leon's, and cupped the flame from the other end. Their conjoined hands encased and protected the flame from all sides. They looked at each other and smiled as their cherished memory from Lestallum came back.

However, sometimes those memories which bring joy can be the same memories that bring pain. There was a very important topic they had to discuss, but neither of them dared to bring it up.

After finishing their dinner, Leon finally mustered the courage and brought up the dreaded topic, "Luna, today is the last day. Tomorrow morning, we will be arriving in Altissia. What will happen to us when we get there?"

Luna put down the fork back in her dish and sat still for more than a minute. She finally gathered her thoughts and said, "Once we get to Altissia your mission will be over. Gentiana can finally return you to your home."

"And what about you?"

"I will meet the First Secretary of Accordo Camelia Claustra and convince her to allow me to summon Leviathan. Once Noctis arrives, I will help him forge the covenant with the Hydraean, and deliver the ring of Lucii to him. With the power of the ring and covenant with the Astrals, the King of kings shall deliver this star to the light and my duty will be fulfilled."

There was a long silence between and neither dared to make eye contact. A lot needed to be said but the strength to form words has eluded them.

"Leon, please promise me one thing," Luna finally broke the uncomfortable silence, her eyes still cast down.

"What is it?" replied in a low voice.

"Promise me that you would leave this world before I go to forge a covenant with Leviathan."

"Why?" Leon was taken aback by her request.

'Because Pryna's visions are never wrong, so you might die at the Altar of the Tidemother. Because I might die before that and it will destroy your soul to see me like that. In case I do survive, I will be with Noctis and it would crush your heart if you see that. Either way, you will get hurt.' Luan surmised in her head.

"I… I don't want you to be there when Noctis is by my side," she relayed knowing fully well how utterly ungrateful she sounded. All she cared about was avoiding Leon's fate even if he hated her for the rest of his life.

'I know that this is not fair, but to protect you from the pain in the future, I am causing you pain right now. I am sorry, I can't protect you from your fate if you are present during the summoning of Leviathan. You must leave before that. I will gladly take your hate to save your life.' She rationalized while trying her best to fight back her tears.

Words such as hurt, ungrateful, discarded, used, betrayed, hate, lonely, and regret, echoed in his head. Leon's mind went through hundreds of different thoughts, his heart ached with every heartbeat.

'I used to think that being alone makes you feel lonely. Now I finally understand that not being needed is what makes you lonely. And it hurts.' His thoughts echoed in his head.

"I am not even invited to your wedding?" was all he responded. It was a stab at Luna's heart and immediately her tears flowed.

His bringing up her wedding was an acknowledgment of the end of their relationship. It was an acknowledgment that Luna had chosen Noctis over Leon. It was an acknowledgment of his fresh hatred towards Luna.

Leon was hurt and part of his subconscious brain wanted to hurt her as well. Only once his emotions subsided, he notice that Luna was sobbing profusely.

Before he could say anything, Luna whispered, "I am so… so sorry." She bolted up from her seat and ran away.

"I am sorry too," he whispered but she was not there to listen.


Notes: Thank you for your patience. Let me know what you think about this chapter in your comments, I would love to hear your thoughts. Thanks :)