ACT II: Inspire Terror, They Said


Note: Thanks as always to my beta-reader, Sakura, without them I would still be staring at my screen hoping for a miracle. Any remaining errors are my fat-fingered attempts.

Thanks as well to all of you, who wait so patiently for me. Your comments are a life-saver.


My heart thundered in my head as I made my way toward the tavern wondering how I was going to get the book from Bull. The mid-morning sun was a blessing against my back and warmed my muscles through my shoulders and neck. The tavern was quiet in the morning, the normal crowds of the soldiers and workers gone for the day. I poked my head in to find it nearly empty. Cabot hung around the bar and cleaned up his dishes. Maryden was nowhere to be found, but Krem was seated quietly in a corner.

Just beyond the stairs of where the lieutenant sat I could see Bull. The massive Qunari was leaned up in his chair, his head propped on an upturned hand as he watched the civilians wander through the tavern's innards. Quietly I stepped over to their end of the space, waving to Krem when I passed him. Bull's one eye lazily floated toward me.

"Mornin', Boss." Bull greeted me with a quiet rumble. I pointed to the chair on his left side and he agreed with a nod. Sliding on my heel, I took the seat and leaned back into it. With a careful blink, I grinned; of course he'd take this spot. He can almost see everything from here, except… My gaze darted to Krem.

"Clever." I murmured. Bull smirked as his gaze caught the path of mine.

"No one said I wasn't." Bull shifted in his seat and sat up a bit straighter. I could see that even if his horns were mostly straight and narrow, they did have a slight curve to them and made it difficult to sit flush with the wall. His green eye settled on my face.

I fidgeted. "So, you're probably well aware, but I'm here for a book."

"So it's true." Bull huffed gently. "Your trainer is pretty crafty, she snuck up to the battlements early this morning."

"How did you see her?" I leant opposite of him so my neck wouldn't cramp while I looked up at him.

"The guards let her in, she slipped past Grim as he was coming back from his rotation." Bull answered with a tilt of his head. My gaze popped at him, surprised. Grim does patrol? Why would he? I suppose Bull would have a few of his men going around the area as well. Leliana must know, extra heads appearing in the night would be suspicious.

"I see. Well then, yeah, it's true. I heard you've got a copy of the book I need." I waited expectantly. There was, for the briefest of moments, hesitation. Bull tensed under my gaze and his neck went tight. Seconds later, he reached around the barrel at his other side and out came an old and heavy tome.

That was too easy. Was it supposed to be easy?

"Do you… just carry it with you?" I chuckled and reached for it. Bull held it over his shoulder, out of my reach, to the point that I nearly toppled into his lap. Surprised, I braced a hand on the armrest between us and glanced at him, comically leaving my hand to bob in the air with my confusion.

"Bull?" I asked, wondering at the look in his eye. The Qunari stared for an eternity. The green eye roamed over my face and my neck before coming back up, steadying on my face. I could feel the heat rush to my ears, a flood that crashed over my eardrums. What is he looking for?

"You sure you want to do this?" He remained in place, leaning up against the wall in his chair, but his voice dropped as did his chin and he held me prisoner with the one-eyed stare. My heart punched the back of my ribs, violently reminding me of our proximity.

"What do you mean?" The sudden intensity set off red flags through my mind, my thoughts racing. He must've been ready for me to come for it, that's why he has it, he wanted to have this chit-chat. There would be a day I wouldn't just fall into his hands at the game he played with me, that my heart wouldn't just twisted at the sight of him.

"Once you become a reaver, there's no going back." Bull warned, the book still held beyond my reach over his shoulder. "What it takes to become one is dangerous. It changes you, inside and out." The hesitation that had raced through him mirrored in my eyes. It took a hot second before I reached up over him and snatched the book from his hand, my blood rushing through my ears at my daring.

"I'll be damned if I let fear stop me now." I answered him, sitting back in my chair, the book cradled in my lap. "And I can read well enough to know the dangers and decide on my own." He stared at me for a moment longer before a long smirk tugged at his mouth and he nodded.

"Good to know. If you need any help, let me know." He replied easily. My gaze narrowed on him, but I took it with a grain of salt. Was that a game? Was he testing me? What was he looking for? Decidedly, I settled into my seat and tucked a leg under the opposite thigh. Bull said nothing and slouched back to his other side as I propped the book open to read. Because I still need help with the harder words.

That, and I can't trust my legs to hold me up right now.

It was a quiet hour or so as I read next to Bull, skimming what I could through the book. The Qunari bothered me only to press a cup of cider in my hands and a piece of bread and apple with it. I could understand a majority of the teachings and the list of ingredients needed for the process. Less of a training regime and more like a transformation. Using dragon's blood to change my core?

That could mean any number of things. I wasn't too familiar on the science behind genetics or the restructuring thereof, but the book made it sound like taking the distilled dragon's blood did exactly that. Would it hurt? The account was vague on that. Prepared or not, it was an endeavor that took the soul from its shell and nuked it.

"Bull?" I quietly tugged for his attention, waiting until his eye cast over me. "What was it like, taking the distillation?" He considered my question with a tilted mouth. I trusted that my Qunari would not lie to me, not for this. He would set the record and wait to watch me fumble my way over it.

"Heated." He replied after a minute. "The book isn't wrong. It's hard to describe. I felt like someone had taken dwarven molten metal and replaced my organs with it." My fingers gripped the edge of the book and I glanced at the fraying pages. Is it symbolic, or is the blood toxic enough to make someone go septic?

A stretch of silence slipped between us. Bull shifted in his seat and sighed, leaning over toward me, his horns a shadow over my head. I slumped slightly in surprise, blinking at him and the sudden proximity. He reached for the book and though I held tight to it for a moment, it released from my fingers.

"If you'd like, I can be with you when you drink it." Bull offered quietly. His gaze swiveled from me to the book and he flipped through until he found a certain page and handed it back. "Your trainer is going to have you make it, part of the test. You'll drink it just before sundown."

"Why sundown?" I asked suddenly, a sense of fear ringing through my ears.

"Gives you a night to rest, if you survive it." Bull replied with a tip of his chin. He held up a finger as I nearly launched into a terrified what do you mean if I survive and shushed me. "Either you'll take to the dragon blood and gain its powers, or you don't, and you're sick for the next month."

"I can't afford to be sick for the next month." I hissed accusingly, knowing full well that he held no responsibility. I pressed back into my seat, a bubble of anger threatening to burst under my tongue despite my best efforts to swallow it. "Guess that fucking means I'm surviving."

Bull laughed, loud and unashamed. "There you go, Boss. That's the spirit."

"You said she was up on the battlements?" I yanked the conversation in the other direction. It's nearly midday now, I should get started if I need to take this fucking thing before sundown. Maker knew I wasn't going to wait another full day to dwell on the consequences of my actions. My anxiety was slowly starting to build from all of this madness.

"I did. She might still be up there. Didn't seem the type to mingle." Iron Bull tucked the book away on his other side when I held my hand out to silently ask for it. "No, you don't need it now. It was only to give you the list of things you need, but I think Red and Josephine got them for you."

"Am I going to get shit for that?" I grumbled when I stood, stretching. "Breaker Thram gonna throw them all over the side and tell me to do it myself?" Bull gave me another chuckle and shrugged one of his shoulders.

"Usually? Yeah. But considering the dire need we have with the current state of things, I think she'll be glad just to get it finished." Bull rubbed at his chin thoughtfully. "My trainer made me do it twice, first batch he gave to someone else. Something about teaching me patience or some shit."

I snorted and patted his arm, "Right, because out of all of us, you're the most buckwild."

"I mean, if you're willing to find out," Bull teased, his mouth smoothed into a grin as he slouched in his chair, extending a leg out to pull at the muscles of his torso. My eyes narrowed on him, amused but willing to fight it, and I snatched my hand back like he had torched it.

"Nope! Gotta be drunk outta my mind to paralyze myself like that, no thank you." I flipped him a wave and wandered out of the tavern, his laughter following behind me with Krem's snickering mixed within it. With a roll of my eyes and a goodbye to all, I stepped out into the courtyard and started making my toward the battlements.

Once I reached the second level of the battlements, I made my way toward the west past Cullen's tower of command with the help of a few pointing fingers. Breaker Thram had taken to camp right at the corner overlooking the west falls of the mountains, the sun bright in her spot and warming the stone comfortably. Smart, it'll be warmest before the night hits and last a bit past sunset. Huh. When I found her, I wasn't sure what I was expecting, but the short powerhouse had not been one of them.

Her mohawk surprised me first, bright white, nearly blond and narrow, hardened eyes glared at me from under its peak. Steel pauldrons armored her with a chestplate carved of leaves and foliage that wrapped around her torso and hips. There wasn't much else on her aside from the battle skirt and vanguards, her hands on her hips.

"Let's look at you." She started, her voice a rip through the air. "Right. You'll survive it. Maybe."

Blindsided, I fell into my manners. "Yes, hello. Uh. And you are?"

"I'm a breaker." She replied, a smirk flirting on her mouth. "My name is Thram, and I was not expecting a messenger from… this place." Left and right, rugs were being yanked out from under me. Did we not inform her? Were we expecting any of the master to just abandon their things and show up?

"You weren't?" I asked lamely, my hands limp at my sides.

"No." She huffed with a laugh. "The Inquisitor wants to be a Reaver. Heh." I bit my tongue to hold back my words. Is it really so unbelievable? I fidgeted in my coat suddenly painfully aware of my body and the skin that wrapped around it.

"Just tell me what to do." I snipped. I was by no means eager to get started, but if it got me out from under her stare, all the better for me. Immediately, her visage and attitude shifted into something harsher, wilder than the amusement in her glare before. She went tight along her lines, up through her arms into her neck and jaw. She tipped on her heel to face me and my own battle-sense geared me for a fight, my back tensed to spring.

"No one tells you what to do. If you're the type who needs that, stop now." She growled at me, watching as my face morphed from tamed expectancy to a pinch in anger. She snorted at me. "This is not a road for those who worry about what others think. You want power. Admit it." My mouth opened to retort, because that was not what I was gunning for, I needed to get stronger for the people under my command.

She stopped me with a swipe of her hand through the air between us.

"You've battles to win. If you give a toss about opinion, you can write your own history after you win." She snapped at me, her gaze glued to my face. "Let's not waste time. You've dragons to conquer, infusions to make, and blood to drink." I steeled myself, willing my bones to let go the insult and relax. My shoulders lowered and I nodded at her.

"Right." I needed to get this finished, fighting about her attitude or my excuses changed nothing. "Tell me how it begins."

-0-

Solas had dragonling blood from the Storm Coast.

Josephine had gotten the rashvines from traders passing through Orlais.

Leliana had located the infusion primers from bandits in Crestwood.

Cullen had them hunted down for efficiency.

How all of them knew what I needed before I had even come home from Crestwood alarmed me to my core. Leliana's predictions were bordering on unnatural. Harritt's smithy was the only area with a forge hot enough to make dragon's blood curl with heat. It was unnerving to know that aside from the rashvines, the ingredients were blood and bone marrow. Infusion primers my ass.

I guess it makes sense. I can't just drink straight dragon's blood, even a distilled version. Mixing them with human bone marrow… The idea behind it was that a Reaver who's blood already had gone through the transformation would assist with my own transitioning. It also set the precedent that if anyone else wanted to become a Reaver, Bull and I were now targets.

I shuddered at the thought of losing such a fight.

Breaker Thram had escorted me as far as the forge before leaving to find Cullen and Leliana. A place would have to be prepared for me when I took the concoction as the side-effects could be violent. I sat in the forge with Harritt, watching as he manned the bellows to keep the heat high and the flames alive. I felt useless, more than I did when I first arrived since I had the Mark to at least do something.

"You doing alright there, Inquisitor?" Harritt wiped at his brow. The blood and the primers were finally boiling and bubbling in their copper pots.

"I am, Harritt. Just… nervous." I gave him a weak smile. "Not every day that someone's got to drink blood, you know?"

"Aye." He coughed, pushing at the coals under the pots with his small shovel. "Not every day the world falls apart either, but here we are." I snorted, amused at the comparison and I shrugged at him with a warm smile. Right, not every day that extreme choices are the only ones we can make.

"For what it's worth, Inquisitor… we're proud of you." Harritt murmured gently. With a snap, my gaze flew up to him in surprise, but he had turned away to grab his heat-resistant dragon-hide gloves to collect the pots from the heat. He said no more after that, and I knew my smith to be a man of few words, at least with me, so I didn't press.

"Thank you, Harritt." I replied quietly. The man fixed me with a long look and nodded. The pots were collected from the flames and with a swiftness born of necessity and blacksmithing, Harritt deftly threw in the crushed rashvines, stirred the mixture, and set it back onto the fire.

Knowing the next steps, I sat up from my crate and walked around toward the table next to the forge, a healthy distance away from the heat. I lined up the glass beaker on the table as Harritt brought over the glass tubes overhead that would be used for the distilling process. The dragon blood and bone marrow climbed back up to temperature, but with the rashvines added, a foul, acrid smell filled the smithy.

I placed my hands over my mouth and nose, "Holy fucking shit, what the fuck is that?"

"Toxin, maybe?" Harritt coughed into the hollow of his elbow, rubbing his nose against it. "Dragon's blood is rumored to have the same potency as lyrium, if not stronger." He moved back to the bellows and continued with a steady pace, keeping the liquids boiling. It was a long hour before enough collected in the glass beaker for a single shot of the concoction.

"There it is, Inquisitor." Harritt allowed the bellows to quieten and the flames to slowly die. With a locked jaw, I moved toward the beaker and lifted it from the table. The liquid was nearly clear with the smallest tint of a blackness to it that I wasn't so sure didn't come from the dragon's blood. I shared a look with Harritt. The man's face set to stone.

Time to hit the ground running.

-0-

We waited until sun down, just as Bull had said. With Breaker Thram's instruction, I was fasting until the last moment. It had explained why Bull had only given me a small morsel for breakfast rather than have a full meal like we were accustomed to eating in Skyhold. Leliana and Thram had settled me in the storage room furthest from the center of Skyhold in the hopes I wouldn't stir up too much attention.

I sat with my back to the wall, the cold stones making my limbs shudder. The concoction rested in the palms of my hands over my lap. I had been stripped down to my dark leggings and a loose tunic. So she doesn't hang herself with it, Breaker Thram had warned. Apparently anything could be a weapon if you tried hard enough. The semi-clear liquid glinted in my hands as I rolled it inside the glass vial.

Bull stood at the door with his back pressed against the wood to secure it shut. No one would barge through it. Krem stood on the other side, I had been told, and he guarded against any unwanted visitors. Solas and Cassandra were at the opposite wall, both as defenders and aggressors. There was a high chance I wouldn't take to the transformation and that was not a chance for chaos anyone was willing to risk.

Not with The Mark vivid in my palm.

Dragon's blood with human bone marrow and rashvine. What the hell was I turning into? When had this become normal? Hell of a time to have second thoughts when the poor bastards already died for this concoction. I rolled the vial between my palms, fear stiffening my fingers and locking my elbows. What will this change? What am I going to be after? Footsteps neared me and I could see the bare feet of my trainer.

"It's time." Breaker Thram commanded. She walked over to me and reached for the vial with lightning swiftness and snapped the cork from the mouth of it. "Drink it fast, do not bring it back up. This is your only chance."

"Great. Right." I muttered. Sweat pooled in my palms with my heart screaming between my ribs, rattling them like jail bars, sobbing to be released. Heartburn and stomach acid scored down my esophagus with heat collecting behind my ears and reaching into my hairline, pulling at my hair. I squared my shoulders for a moment, inhaled deeply and held it tight.

I exhaled, my shoulders slumped, and I shot the concoction into my throat.

It pierced the soft flesh of my throat like a spear, a sunburst of spice and flame spiraling down my throat and around my neck, curdling my skin. My hands immediately grasped for my throat as violent instinct attempted to rip the fluid out. The vial shattered somewhere near my feet, time speeding through my mind, the shards dancing across the floorboards like fairy lights in the torchlight.

My throat constricted, my hands clawed at my clavicle uncontrollably.

My tonsils felt like they disintegrated along with my tongue and the whole of my mouth went cotton-dry before flooding with the sensation of gritty, packed sand. An exhale raced up my esophagus, burning the whole way up with a scream. My lungs desperately tried to inhale it back, a sob fighting past the scream with my stomach following close behind it, protesting the vile bile that it had been given. All my internal organs were in chaos and the next deep breathe that hissed through my teeth knocked me back with heat.

The stool I was on skidded across the wall and floor, I hadn't realized I toppled off from it. Did I throw that? One hand gripped my neck and tugged instinctively. Red marks were scored down my flesh. My eyes were blown wide, but the edges of my vision were blackened and scraped with colors. I couldn't see through the shadows to the people who surrounded me.

What's happening! What's wrong!

My thoughts were riots between my ears and there must have been a scream or a howl somewhere. Each of them coming from the bowels of my charred stomach, swearing from the searing pain. I could hear voices through my head as I hit the ground with both hands wild against the floorboards, scraping and grasping at nothing but the edges of the wood when the cramps struck my abdomen. My fingertips were bleeding and leaving streaks across the floor.

A bolt of magic attempted to reach me. Teal green and white with blue laced through it. My gaze snapped to it, the Mark in my hand screamed at it and without a thought my hand came up to swipe at the energy as it hurtled toward me, defending myself from the intrusion. The Mark flared open and a burst of red swallowed the magic, scattering it through the air. Gasps followed and I was uncertain if they were mine.

The deep red and copper claws over my hand struck down from momentum and scalped the floorboards, leaving deep grooves in front of me. There were noises of alarm, someone shouted for something, but there was too much chaos in my body for me to care. Everything in me vibrated and had I the presence of mind to notice, I would no doubt split through time like Flash.

Boots entered my tunnel vision, unfamiliar and dull as they neared me. There was another scream and I rocketed away with my back slamming against the wall. A firework of green and white burst off to my left, the Mark flared in my palm with ice spiking up through my arm and into my shoulder. You're not helping! My back slammed against the wall again with such a force that I saw stars spark around my eyes in the black edges of my vision.

Arms found me and wrapped around my shoulders and back, dragging me away from the wall. My legs fought back without my consent, kicking and thrashing to throw me out of whoever had come to secure me. The arms held me tighter and I rocked to wiggle loose, the fire growing hotter in my mouth and through my lungs, scalding my tongue and the roof of my throat. I must have been screaming, but I couldn't hear a thing beyond the roaring of flames in my head and my hurricane thoughts.

My hand found purchase on one of the arms, the Mark flared wildly and without a second to consider what was happening, a copper-red claw formed around my hand and ripped. The arms tightened around me as my vision went black with irrational rage and I reached up to claw at my captor a second time. A hand caught my wrist and dragged it around my side to pin me to the floor. My lungs inhaled and my knees bent to find a way to shove myself upward.

A mountain's worth of weight slammed into my back and smacked me into the floorboards.

That's Bull?

With one arm pinned to my back and my Marked hand caught under me, I couldn't lift myself up. There was a sharp tingle in my nose and I could smell the copper-laced scent of blood from somewhere. Is it — mine? My body shoved again, hoping to buck off my Qunari. He grunted over me, but held steady. The flames were quieting in my chest, the rage in my ears and the hollow in my eyes was fading.

My limbs were going limp. The breath through my lungs was shallow and I could taste blood in my mouth. It was a sweet relief to feel it against my teeth and my tongue, knowing that it meant the concoction had disappeared from my lips. Reflexively I swallowed, my vision was darkening and I wiggled my fingers against Bull's chest where my arm was pinned.

"She's alive?" Cassandra's voice floated through my ears, garbled and distorted. My thoughts were re-organizing themselves into coherency. I could feel myself think and it made my temples throb.

"She's breathing." Bull murmured over my head. Correction; I'm panting. I can't catch my breath. I want to breathe. Gently, he sat up from his pin, his arms still holding me down. He hissed lightly and shifted again, his hips next to mine and his grip still on my wrist. "Damn, she got me good."

"Be careful." Breaker Thram broke through, kneeling next to my face as she reached over to inspect Bull's wound. I must have left that. Did I strike him? "If her blood mixes with yours, it could kill you."

"Nah, a little blood between friends never hurt." Bull dismissed her, his hand letting go of my arm. It flopped weakly against the ground. There was no strength to lift myself up or to move and roll over. My chin rested against the floor and slid so that my cheek pressed against it as well.

"Did the blood take?" Cassandra asked with a bit more sharpness to her words.

"It did. She lives, she breathes. In a few moments she'll prove it." Breaker Thram confirmed. Like hell I will, I feel like limp-ass noodles. My muscles protested every twitch that I commanded of them, my eyes were burnt from the inside out and stung with every blink.

"I hate all of you," I whispered into the floor, the heat and moisture of my breath tickled my nose. There was a long snort from my Qunari and he chuckled. My fingers tapped whatever body part of his was closest. My vision was too blurry to make sense of the world around me. "Up, please."

"Yes, ma'am." Bull agreed and gently tucked his hands under my hips and pulled me back enough to pick me up by my shoulders. A wave of shivers wiggled through my body and had me shuddering in his grip as electricity hissed just under my skin at the contact. Without a single word, Bull adjusted into a sit with his legs crossed and tucked me up against his chest.

I could hear his heart thud against my ear like a warning bell.

Cassandra knelt next to us, glaring at me. "Jaime."

"Agh, what, Cass?" My voice fought through molasses, my irritation thick with the overwhelming stimuli that smothered me. "Someone… turn off the goddamn lights. Shit hurts." My words were incoherent, apparently, because she blinked at me in confusion. Solas came closer and leaned against his staff to inspect me before looking to Breaker Thram.

"Sensitivity is common for survivors." Thram explained, standing with her hands on her hips. "She's taken to the blood. Light, food, even water will be difficult for her. She'll manage." I glared at the breaker over the wall of Bull's arm that rested across my shoulders and down my front.

She wasn't wrong. The torchlight beamed like a high voltage bulb and pulsed with my heartbeats. The heat from Bull's body was almost unbearable, but my strength wasn't enough to escape him. Why is he hugging me, I thought irritably. My skin pricked and cringed with each brush of searing contact between us, the hairs on my head felt fake and glued to my scalp. Am I going to throw up? I can only taste the blood. Another swallow did nothing to alleviate the sourness that coated my teeth.

"How long will this last?" Cassandra asked, a tremor in her voice. I winced and ducked my head into my shoulders, hoping to block out the voices and the noise. Bull shifted again and brought his hand up to cover my exposed ear and press the other side of my face to his chest. The thrum of his heart hurt to listen to, but it was better than the voices.

"Tonight, or if she's weaker than I thought, the next couple of days." Breaker Thram answered.

"I'll be… fucking damned if this…" I struggled, my voice sounded jumbled and doubled over in my head, making it difficult to bring the words free of my twisting tongue. My eyes shut tightly, "— No. It stops."

"I do not believe you will be able to control that, my friend." Solas spoke gently, his words a whisper to my senses.

"Fucking watch me." I snarled under Bull's arm. A rumbling chuckle went through his chest and I fought to be free of it. My soul felt like it shook with his chuckle and my knees went weak with the sensation. He handled me like an obstinate puppy and changed his arms around to hold me securely, hiding more of my face from the outside world.

"Does the blood change her attitude?" Cassandra bit sarcastically.

"It does not. Irritation from overstimulation." Thram explained with a huff. "Her attitude is of her own making. She'll learn to accept it and stop complaining."

"I'm going to eat her," I muttered angrily to Bull. The Qunari's lungs rattled with suppressed laughter and he held me tighter as if I would spring from his arms and do exactly that. I almost missed it, the gentle flutter of a palm down my spine, smooth and steady as it paced back and forth along its path. A spider's web of tingles crawled over my ribs and brought my muscles to shudder.. I blinked, but the sudden realization silenced me, surprised by how easily Bull fell into comforting me and how easily I allowed it.

It's not the first time, either.

Fuck, this was dangerous. My mouth clamped shut as a rapid strike of fear shot through my lungs into my stomach, bottoming it out. I can't trust it, I can't trust it, don't trust it. Let it go. Get out. My panicked thoughts raced around my brain and my limbs wiggled for freedom. Bull relented and eased back, his arms falling to rest on his knees with me in his lap. He tilted his head at me.

"I need sleep." I said bluntly, turning my gaze to the floor as heat rushed my cheeks. All eloquence having flown from my mind. Bull's gaze swiveled down to me, but I ignored him and crawled from his lap. His hand steadied me from the small of my back and I stumbled forward into Solas' arms. I gripped onto the elf like life was draining from my limbs and glanced at him, silently pleading for some sort of salvation.

"Right." Solas caught on, hooking an arm around my elbow. "I shall see to her and check on the Mark. We should consider the changes it will be undergoing as well."

"Advise us of any detrimental changes." Cassandra ordered us, watching us stumble toward the door. "Leliana will be told to expect a day's delay."

"No," I snapped at her unexpectedly. The Seeker was unmoved, but her eyebrows rose. My jaw tightened and my voice mangled itself down into something quieter, "I'll be ready." Solas silenced me before I said anything else damning and escorted me out the door. My gaze avoided Krem as we left, the lieutenant's stare burned holes into my back.

"... what have I done, Solas?" I asked him, clinging to his arm for sanity.

"... Ir abelas, da'len. I do not know."