Night-Owl Romance
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Note: This chapter will have no Zen interaction, will just be focusing on MC's time in Seoul as a first-time student.
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Chapter 9: Choices and Consequences
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Only a handful had contacted the party planner's new online address: the leader of the coffee club Yoosung had mentioned, some Lizard gaming association and Rui, a photographer and V's close acquaintance. This small number of contacts was very manageable considering Mina's first impression of the e-mails was that those had been written in hieroglyphs – the contents were simply indecipherable! All three potential guests were expecting the girl to be magically well versed in their fields of interest, seeking the coordinator's advice about certain products or choices they should make within their line of work. She'd mildly trembled while reading their questions, furiously scribbling notes and typing out keypoints to use as a start in her research.
Nearly half the content felt so alien... ;-;
The girl was rapidly losing confidence in her abilities since she couldn't formulate a single reply within a short amount of time or without a shred of doubt of the answer's validity. However, V's words quickly flashed into mind.
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'If you ever feel overwhelmed, don't stress over it needlessly.'
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Easier said than done...
The topic she had been quite familiar with was coffee, having learnt multiple tricks from her previous jobs so she did not bat an eyelash when opening the e-mail. Was that experience useful to Mina in any way?
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(ノಥ益ಥ)ノ
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Exactly.
This club leader wanted to quiz the girl about various facts surrounding X strains of coffee beans or ranking foreign brands according to their notoriety and quality beverages – most of which she hadn't even heard of, plus other trivia about the cultures renowned for the best coffee beans in the world. Not to mention, the guy was curious about the best way to prepare certain types of drinks and what was popular these days between the youths. Hah! Mina barely knew how to pronounce most of the concoctions' names, let alone write back something intelligible and professional.
This stuff was fancier than those drinks selling in any normal shops, stores or bars.
And this hurdle marked only the beginning – the other guests came with their own sets of challenging questionnaires.
Two hours looming into the Lizard world and Mina had grown beyond desperate in her quest – no matter how much she was reading about their games, the girl had barely scratched the surface and nothing substantial could be of use.
Thus, Mina resorted to the next best option!
The coordinator phoned Yoosung for his assistance, praying the boy was available and not stuck in a raid or – "MC!"
"You need my help so badly OwO?!"
"...Yes?", she said truthfully, glancing sideways confused. Yoosung was more than happy to offer his 'expertise'. "Ask me anything and I'll be at your service, MC~! I'll save the day~~~~!", he spoke way too cheerfully, the girl sweat dropping a large amount.
"T-Thanks~!", she was already regretting this, nervously giggling and smiling from one corner of the mouth. Nevertheless, Yoosung proved to be a most valuable source of knowledge, filling up the many gaps she had about Lizard... that is, before LOLOL took over the conversation.
Mina felt as if a brick had fallen on top of her head.
The college boy was complaining about his favorite game and how some players on the server teamed up in order to ruin his reputation by creating fake accounts and pretending to be alts of his main character.
"Then... Listen to this! These guys had the nerves to go on a scamming-spree, some guild mates messaging me on CocoaTalk, asking whether it was me or not. They've done a lot of damage while I've been offline... Aigoo...! I was so upset when I heard all of this..."
"I see..."
"Can you believe such people exist?!"
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"Ruining someone's hard work without remorse..."
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"..."
Mina's eyes glistened as she was attentively listening to him, her breathing becoming heavier.
Eventually, the girl couldn't take hearing his complaints anymore and faked hearing someone ringing the doorbell before swiftly hanging up. Only later did she realize how lousy that excuse was, learning from Seven's sudden text message that the blonde had desperately called him to check the security cameras pronto.
*deep sigh*
The party planner should have been nicer towards Yoosung and help the boy out of this serious pickle in some way, but it was incredibly difficult since his connection with SKY kept poking at the many scabs left by her university experience.
Yoosung's troubles in game were mirroring those she'd experience so damn well in real life, that it made her body shake from flashbacks.
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Yes, Mina did believe such cruelty existed in people.
She had been friends with one who did not show her true colors until it was too late for the party planner.
Regrets could not heal broken dreams.
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Mina was hesitant to press the button, afraid she'd already messed up terribly.
She had done her best, she really did...
*deep sigh*
Re-reading the phrasing one last time, she stopped beating around the bush and sent out the e-mails towards the guests. She chewed onto her bottom lip worriedly as there'd been two significant details which the coordinator could not provide them: the date of the party and its setting. V hadn't been online since their initial encounter while the rest of the members did not have the authority to make decisions in his stead. Heck, even Jumin, the heir to a massive business conglomerate, had more time than the photographer to check into the messenger!
;-;
Well, V did mention how he would be returning sometimes later this week, however...
Mina wasn't sure if all these guests would approve of such vagueness regarding their party and might have second thoughts about attending the event. Maybe the R.F.A. could specify an approximate timeline or venue area, and after V returns then she could narrow it down to more specific information. The girl really needed to know these matters as the party coordinator, but she lacked V's contact info which was a bit odd. Mina assumed the reasoning behind this decision was because of his status as the R.F.A. leader which meant that he couldn't offer his information candidly.
The girl remained a suspicious presence for the group.
But, at the same time, Mina was placed in such a vital position for their charity event – whether it was going to be a hit or miss, it would be determined from the quality of her work. In which case, shouldn't she be, like... in touch more often with V?
"Ah well... stop stressing over it. It's Day-1, not the end of the world!", she nodded determined, putting aside the phone.
"..."
"..."
"..."
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'What now...?'
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Mina tapped her fingers onto the coffee table as she wondered what activities she could be doing around the apartment. Her eyes eventually landed on the sketchbook, suddenly remembering her own abandoned art site. It had been long left in the dust, not having logged into it since her departure from SKY. The feedback wasn't plentiful when she'd began posting there but the few encouraging comments would always warm up and comfort her heart and give her strength to continue on this path.
Plus, she had regular folks commenting with each update.
3
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Sadly, their love wouldn't last.
Hatred filled up her page shortly before Mina had to forcefully put a stop to her university classes and the culprit behind the slander wasn't unknown to the girl. But she had no power to overrule the negative sentiment or solid proof. There had been an outpour of comments that were borderline vile, and mean, and spreading so much misinformation about the charlatan artist that even the girl's regulars had turned their backs onto her as soon as her true nature had been revealed.
Those few who still protected Mina with proof of her personal DM's showcasing how sweet and kind, and helpful she'd been with her constructive feedback regarding their own arts, were reprimanded for their gullible nature.
And were just as bad as this charlatan!
Mina was hesitant but curious to peek a little into that world again, hoping that the years had put a veil onto the whole debacle and healed her page – but it was a heart attack waiting to happen. The inbox was filled with thousands of messages and the most recent comments reignited her pain and disappointments so much that the girl quickly slammed her computer shut as the adrenaline rush caused her heart palpitations.
That website had died and there was no point revisiting it.
Mina took some minutes to cool herself down, drinking a liter of cold water to control her emotions before trying a different approach and see how that faired. Seven had bought her the sketchbook for a purpose. The hacker also showed no malice towards her but kindness and appreciation to her drawings. 'I think.' O-O
Judging by the titles he'd found and shared, he must have surely known of her website and reputation there.
And he did not give a damn~!
Maybe he'd also realized something was amiss, so was this his way to push the girl into reigniting her passion? Was she overthinking his gesture to this extent? Taking the sketch book and opening it to the first page, she sat in front of the small table, picking up a couple of graphite pencils, an eraser, and...
Nothing.
The gesture which used to come so naturally in the past now felt completely bizarre, the tip touching the paper in confused and uncertain strokes.
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*deep sigh*
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Mina was unsure whether to keep continuing this tragedy of a drawing or not. Nothing good would clearly come out of her attempt for Mina's heart wasn't connected to what she was doing. It was closed up, vividly remembering the awful memories of the past that shattered her world and sucked her dry of inspiration.
Her headache wasn't helping, nor her blurred vision that was ruining the paper...
The talk she had with Assistant Lee had left a lingering bitterness clutching around her body in a restrictive manner. Today, she had been unable to refuse any requests and followed him like an obedient puppy despite Mina having no obligations towards him anymore. The man had been nothing but tame and dare say kind, even pushing Mina to return to the university despite everything that's happened there.
A place which had shattered Mina's will to pursue the arts...
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In a city that fuelled the destructive chaos entrapping her passions...
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A city where happiness could turn into dust in the blink of an eye...
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~oOo~
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Here I was...
At the bus station, carrying a really heavy backpack and a large purple wheeled stroller with all the minimum necessities for the big move. I had been so thankful for the opportunity and the new adventures awaiting me, more and more excited by the day~!
Obviously, this resulted in my separation from eomma, Kim-appa and Mirae.
I thought I was ready but on that day,
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We've kissed and hugged as I said my farewells with a heavy heart.
And with each step taken, the distance between me and my family was growing.
I didn't know when I would be seeing them next,
their figures disappearing as the bus left the station...
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Seoul was an expensive city to live in.
On your own it was especially challenging.
Travelling there from Daegu was not cheap either.
So I was left on my own,
For the first time in my life...
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I was completely and utterly alone.
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I was thankful that my parents had used their savings with my move and helped me with living expenses during the first couple of months, giving me enough time to find a job and settle in comfortably into the apartment they had discovered on a website. It was supposedly from a trustworthy source, highly recommended at Kim-appa's work by one of his acquaintances whose son had gone to study in Seoul too before heading abroad.
Trustworthy source, he couldn't stress this enough.
The building complex was advertised properly online with lots of pictures and videos as proof of the vacant apartments. It looked amazing and after arriving there, apart from some cracks and water shortages here and there, I personally had no complaints with the place, even getting along with the other tenants. A younger man with short light hair and blue or green eyes was especially helpful when I would be carrying heavier loads from uni / shopping.
Everything was going as I've imagined so far.
But,
In reality...
The outward appearance of the building and its finishes hid a foul, rotten interior. Eventually, the landowner was forced to start some major construction work and bring the building up to standards after someone had allegedly tipped off the authorities of the problems, so no one was allowed to live in there until the problems had been dealt with. Unfortunately, the shocking news meant that I had to quickly find another place to temporarily live in while those problems were being solved, but they did not provide me enough time for research.
I was livid.
Thankfully – or not – that sweet guy who'd been helping me out had left me a business card and phone number. The man on the phone was an acquaintance of his who had available housing he could temporarily offer me for a cheap price each month. It wasn't the best place to live in but I could not afford renting in other areas as many people expected a 3-months deposit of hundreds of dollars MINIMUM, which I did not have to spare.
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And I did not want to bring in my family to this mess.
Our finances weren't that great and I did not want to be a burden them more than I had with this move to Seoul.
Mirae was also young and needed mom 24/7.
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There were no options I could pick.
So...
I guess I had to endure.
But...
I did not realize that the whole story of this construction site had been fabricated.
It turned out to have all been a scam.
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^.^
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And for the past year I'd been stuck living in a rundown block with outdoor metal stairs that squeaked unpleasantly and felt quite unstable to use as I've walked on them, shakily pushing forwards. My room on the third floor had very poor heating and the plumbing was also defective, water dripping in the sink night, after night... I had to keep using pots to collect the water and not waste it.
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So why was I complaining about these conditions?!
If I didn't like it,
I could always find another apartment to rent!
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I couldn't afford to.
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I couldn't complain to the landlord as he made it crystal clear how it wasn't his job to aid me in any way and he was only helping me so much because of the contact friend – the first time I've asked about these issues being fixed, the rugged man shot an ungrateful look towards my face and yelled powerfully.
He was already renting this room as cheaply as possible and now I had the audacity to complain about the conditions?!
"Be thankful I'm not asking for more of your sorry ass money!"
"!", shock ran through my features, my eyes becoming widest possible.
I had never been spoken to so rudely by a stranger and just for pointing out the problems I was facing... I wasn't demanding the man paying for all the repairs despite his legal responsibilities to do so. I wanted us to find a solution together since HE was responsible with the state of this shitty building complex, but no...
I could bargain with no one.
Also my written complaints to the authorities deemed no response.
Or to the police.
In fact, the landowner finding out from one of his officer friends made him especially threatening and dangerous. So I've kept my mouth shut, not wanting to make my situation worse for wear but the entire 'spectacle' was seen by the nearby residents who were also looking at me with judgmental expressions.
Some of the people living here were odd and... unsettling.
The worst person out of the bunch turned out to be this guy living right next door to mine.
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He said he was also a friend of my former tenant acquaintance from the first apartment building. That blue-green eyed person.
So I've let my guard down and interacted with my neighbor quite happily.
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Quite too happily.
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We were even neighbors on the same corridor which was interesting to say the least.
But...
These interactions between us had been a mistake I couldn't undo.
I could hear the guy far too well during his 'alone' times or when he was watching questionable videos to spice up his night life. Sometimes, he would be accompanied in his 'activities' by other females, different voice heard for different nights.
This guy...
He didn't appear the type to hold onto girlfriends or have one love him willingly, so...
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Yeah...
His loud routines were poisoning my dreams and ruining my sleep.
One time, I clearly remember how we've passed each other down the hallway and, despite being a very rude gesture as he were a senior age than mine, I did not greet him. He was drunk at the time and immediately caused a scene after he'd attempted to mumble words towards my direction. I ignored him, passing by without losing speed. In his drunken haze, this called me out gleefully by another name, leaping towards me and gripping my wrist tightly.
My sensitive wrist.
And all of a sudden, he tried to force me into his apartment with the obvious intentions to keep me there for the night, but with a swift and powerful shove I've managed to get away and quickly barricaded myself into my room, forgetting all about my morning shift at the store or college for the remaining week.
My body was shivering, losing all appetite and desire for food from the shock of 'what could have happened'
If he were conscious and with more determination... I could have gotten the shorter end of the stick.
I did not give people a pass, nor excuse his actions on the alcohol – so I tried seeking help. The police officer on the phone listened to my request dully, at one point asking this - "What were you wearing? Did you provoke him? Wasn't it all a misunderstanding between you? Miss, I'm afraid we limit calls to serious incidents as we don't like to interfere in a lover's quarrel."
"W-What are you sa-"
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*-BEEEEEEEP!*
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"..."
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I simply broke down.
I was afraid to come out of my own damn apartment afterwards or ever interact with this guy.
I lost my job at the convenience store because of my inability to leave the room.
I didn't have the money to move out of here.
And I barely had money to survive each month.
I didn't have any friends in uni that could and would help me with a spare room or a couch.
The university didn't have housing for students who didn't have top rankings.
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So I was trapped,
Experiencing the worst moments in my life...
Surpassing those dark days of my sweet 16 when the wrist surgery nearly ruined my dreams.
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I couldn't concentrate on any type of studying anymore.
My grades were plummeting to the ground at an alarming rate. My creations were not up to standard anymore, making the students around me question my self-worth and question the real reason I was even admitted into SKY. I was thankful that despite the rumors, I still had people around me who understood my plight and cheered me on.
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Hyeri was a big support at the time.
Which is funny.
Because,
Later on I'd discovered how she had been the main instigator of those nasty rumors.
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So even with all these hurdles, I still managed to finish my assignments.
The teachers weren't over the moon over my work but some... Gosh, bless them~! Gave me more chances than I'd honestly deserved to prove my worth due to the potential they saw in me. One of the more renowned teachers had mentioned this aspect while handing out the canvas that he had graded poorly according to his expectations of me. The elder was extremely disappointed but nothing could match the intensity felt by his teaching assistant.
The man was responsible for creating the assignments and the work groups.
Assistant Lee was furious and while he understood her issues outside of uni, it should not reflect on her academic performance. "Your portfolio is the sole reason I am still fighting for you being in this classroom and not allowing him to kick you out.", he confessed one afternoon, arranging the glasses on his face as his eyes bore deep within hers.
"Redo the assignment with more dilligence!"
"This here – we are not playing games!"
I wish I could say that these people pushing me harder to do better and improve also gave me the motivation to prove those negative rumors wrong, but... the appalling pieces kept coming out of my depressed, exhausted body...
Eventually...
Even the most patient people had lost faith in me and my skills.
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The cherry on top came within months of gruesome experiences,\
Culminating with my "accident" at uni.
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While the teachers had been initially understanding about the injuries I had sustained after my "clumsy accident" down the staircase due to my exhaustion – which I know had not been the case at all as I had been pushed, but did not have proof to show - that did not mean that now I had free reign to pour out crap and call it a day after the healing period had ended.
*deep sigh*
Since then, these rumors and negative remarks had flourished and became more audible, the student not caring if I were nearby and could overhear their conversations. The criticisms were never-ending.
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"Did she really join with her own powers? She is so bad at it, ha ha ha!"
"My friend failed to enter the uni this semester..."
"Maybe this bitch took his spot in the rankings!"
"When you put it like that... it does make you upset how she'd surpassed someone like oppa!"
"Who did her parents pay, I wonder...? She has no talent at all! What's that shit?!"
"Hahahahaa! My nephew does better work at pre-school!"
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Assistant Lee pierced me with a frustrated expression, demanding I stay in class after hours for a lecture which I can still recite to this day.
"You're already destroying your future career with this trash. You'd show more respect for us if you'd skipped sending in your assignments than force us to review these horrendous pieces of garbage!"
"Tch... so much wasted paper..."
"IT'S REVOLTING!"
And to prove his point, he ripped everything apart in front of me and literally threw it in the trash bin next to the desk. It was overflowing with content that he'd ripped because of me... like burning sensation dripping from my eyes.
"It's for your own good...", the assistant whispered, unmoved by her tear stained face.
"Get your shit together, Mina. Or get the hell out of this classroom; there are far more deserving youths in the world who are ready to take your place in a heartbeat."
"You are not irreplaceable to this collective."
The man excused himself swiftly, leaving me alone in the entire classroom, standing like a fool... crumbling... as I watched my entire world shredded into lifeless pieces.
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The next week, news of Assistant Lee offering Hyeri an exhibition opportunity at his gallery for her paintings had earned the class' approval and aplause.
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And if that "accident" didn't have a solid name, then after this news,
I had my suspect.
Since the accident, Hyeri never once bothered speaking to me ever again.
Our group project – they had voted me off the team, but Hyeri was the one who shared how the other members wanted her out and she'd fought hard to keep me there.
Okay, I understood.
What brought me more conviction of this possibility was a conversation I'd overheard between two former team mates on a group project.
They should have trusted in Hyeri's initial judgment that Mina would bring their team down with her lies and craziness.
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"Hyeri had been correct all along!"
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Long story short, I tried pursuing this lead and had confided in Assistant Lee who looked as if he'd want to slap me instantly for this suggestion, but refrained as his raised hand was quickly brought into a fist towards his mouth.
He'd coughed and alleviated his anger.
"Fine, I'll play along."
But to my sheer horror, the security footage of the accident had either gaps of my fall or footage that I couldn't recognize in its place. Plus, the library records showed the wrong data and it was like I'd been erased from the system that day. Instead, I was shown being outdoors and hanging around a young man who confessed that indeed – we had been together during those earlier hours instead of working on the group assignment like "I've claimed".
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And I had never even interacted with him before.
He'd usually talk with the likes of Hyeri or the other pretty and popular girls, not me.
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"Oh..."
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Hyeri again.
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I couldn't stop from shaking when I'd realized how much the name popped up and after doing some digging, those rose tinted glasses had been shattered. I didn't realize how much of an influence a girl like her could have in this university - her parents would be frequent donors to the university, but that didn't mean she didn't possess artistic talents or knowledge.
Even so,
Assistant Lee never pegged me as a liar although he was beginning to have doubts himself in me. And while he did want to believe in my story and the sincerity behind my broken voice and tears, he also couldn't hold a student's side without evidence. Or punish another the same way.
If anything – the poor character was currently displayed by...
Me.
So If I kept going down this path, the only punishment would be given to me – and I'd risk permanent expulsion. "Are you willing to risk this?" Ah well, the damage could not be erased and the consequences stained my reputation regardless.
Assistant Lee was 100% correct about one thing.
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I was not irreplaceable here.
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The truth hurt like thousands of paper cuts and the decision I made next was one I had never dreamed possible.
But it was necessary.
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I quit university... for a while.
I managed to freeze my remaining semester of that year,
dismissing myself from all study subjects.
And I was finally free...
Free to grab a second job if necessary to fill in the cash void.
And work hard for a better living environment.
And after sorting out that crap, I could refocus on my studying and wait for the new university cycle,
Wait for the current generation of students to be gone and start fresh.
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My plan was proving difficult to accomplish...
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Still, after all this time had passed, I kept wondering why –
Why am I so unlucky to have such scenarios happening to me...?
Why couldn't I make friends that wouldn't hurt me?
Was my face really so arrogant-looking to people?
Did my smiles seem so fake?
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Was my accident really because of a stupid gallery exhibition?
I've also heard those rumors and I was honored, but REALLY I wouldn't have gotten it due to my fucking decaying skills.
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If Hyeri wanted her artwork displayed there, I'd have gladly stepped down the list or personally talked with Assistant Lee, just to avoid such crossfires.
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I didn't hold that much value to the opportunity as she had.
Unfortunately...
What-ifs couldn't change the outcome.
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In barely half a year, I'd successfully ruined my life...
Achievement unlocked~!
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My birthday present was the frozen year from SKY University, gaining the reputation of being a shameful dead last.
Hah...
I could not have imagined this scenario in my wildest nightmares...
This cruel reality...
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I felt like dying.
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But I remained strong.
And hopeful.
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I wonder...
If my salvation has arrived...
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With the R.F.A.
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*RING RING RING RING*
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Note: Dun dun dun~~~~ Stay tuned for the next chapter, which will have fluffier parts ^o^
