Night-Owl Romance
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Note: Thanks to everybody still having the patience of reading this story behemoth~! 3
I'm quite proud of this chapter xd considering the god awful writer's block, moving the focus to some past moments instead of forcing myself to write more about the 'present' was refreshing for my brain. The only canon portion of this part is V being around Zen when his bike accident happened (due to him stalking the poor soul for photos lololol).
Also tried to imagine what would make him be so reckless enough to be such a speedy gonzales on wheels.
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Chapter 46: An Evening inside a Wolf's Den 2: Interlude of the Past - Zen's motorbike accident
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~ *4 YEARS AGO* ~
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The R.F.A. was an organization at its inception, Zen having yet to officially join their ranks.
He hadn't known Rika and V for long, the couple having recently visited him backstage after the show's encore one night, when they handed him a large bouquet of red roses. It caught the actor off-guard. O-O He'd initially believed their gesture to be an innocent error as they were probably looking for the leads and must have mistaken him for one of them. At the time, Zen wasn't a well-known musical actor, nor was he a familiar figure to the regular audience members at this theatre company. He had been mostly playing supporting characters in the background or minor roles which would rarely put him in the spotlight, so he'd never had people come up to the dressing room with a gift before.
"It's no mistake, these are for you!"
Rika went as far as mentioning how much she had enjoyed seeing Zen's performance and had confessed to being a huge fan of his over the years, closely following his activities since his debut~! She made sure to butter him up in countless compliments about his acting before popping her request and the true intention of their visit.
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Rika would love it if Zen would consider working with them on some charity projects, and why not, join the R.F.A. in the long run.
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*shocked*
V was on the same page as his fiancée, plus offering the handsome male the chance to update his portfolio if he were willing to model for pictures and let him do some photo shoots.
*double shocked*
It left him with his heart fluttering wildly.
Alas,
He remained uncertain and a little bit weary of the founders' true intentions, believing that their purpose in recruiting him was to be used as a means to attract people to their events and charm the guests into donating larger sums of money than they'd originally intended to. In hindsight, he really wasn't against this notion when done for selfless reasons. Like, in this case, charity~! The benefits for the actor would apparently be worthwhile too, Rika reassuring him that the participants to the R.F.A. parties would be from various walks of life, including some from the entertainment industry, whom Zen would surely want to get acquainted with at the venue.
Everything sounded great and everything, but the actor was doubtful that this was the full extent of their plans for him. Nonetheless, he had to come clean before they'd regret their offer.
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Zen wasn't a charitable individual per se and had never seriously put his mind into becoming one.
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Before anyway.
One – donations from him would most likely be non-existent. Heck, he barely had the necessary funds to sustain himself, living paycheck to paycheck and gritting his teeth at the end of each month, dreading when the last coin would be spent. Two – his work at the theatre was a time-consuming endeavor, but very important to him. Whatever plans they had in store for him might not work due to conflicting schedules. His priority would always be his acting compared to the R.F.A. And Three – he did not want to bring unwarranted attention to the organization and ruin the purity of their events. Zen used to actively participate in gang related activities right after running away from home and, while he personally never did like any super bad stuff or willingly sought out trouble, the actor's role in the group merely that of an errand boy for his seniors (and seldom getting the money people owned to the leader through all means necessary, a few threats included... -), there were instances when some of the 'overly passionate' younger members would clash with outsiders whom they believed 'were looking down upon them and disrespecting their new family'. These conflicts could escalate rapidly, especially after nights out drinking and clubbing. Zen needed to be the level headed one in that situation and get physically involved just to break things up between the battling participants. And do it swiftly before the cops showed up, arresting the whole lot. His knuckled would turn red and appear very bruised up in the aftermath, needing to dunk them in ice water just to numb the pain. Stupid decisions by the youth, but apart from improving his fighting skills, Zen also picked up his drinking and smoking habit quite early on joining the gang, before he would be legally allowed to.
I mean...
He had to in order to properly bond with everybody there...
And it made him look cooler and seem more mature! -
In conclusion,
The actor could, although most likely would, damage the organization's reputation as a massive scandal may pop at any given time. He didn't see the point in joining them, frankly...
"Your past may have shaped the 'you' of the present but it is only a stepping stone for a better and improved self in the future.", Rika smiled prettily, revealing that she had taken the actor's past into careful consideration before bringing up the topic to him. The R.F.A. could help improve his image in the public eye and show his growth through his participation in their charities if things went south. And Rika was quite certain too about the positive influence Zen would have on their overall charity events and guests.
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Zen would be the most suitable member to help her cause and bring her vision to life with his charismatic nature~!
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"And shining a bright light into someone's darkness, offering them some semblance of relief and happiness during their most distressing of days..."
"I believe them to be the most important gifts one can give to souls tormented by the sins of the world."
"Money is not everything people need in order to survive and build a better tomorrow."
"Sometimes, hope is what they need."
"And your acting gives people a reason to look forward to another day."
"I believe in your potential to achieve greater things."
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Zen didn't know what answer to give the cheery couple even hours later after parting ways, the actor contemplating the situation at hand while lying in his bed.
Destiny was suddenly smiling down upon him and opening up a door he hadn't dared dreaming of before. Truth be told, Zen had been struggling with a lot of personal issues prior to their meeting, apart from the hardships which came from being totally independent and not reliant on his gang mates anymore...
His landlord had significantly increased the rent starting with the following month, so Zen had to carefully reevaluate his monthly expenses which ended in quite the emotional rut for him. He couldn't buy his then-lady the gifts she'd desired anymore, otherwise he would have had to say goodbye to the warmth and security of his apartment. Food was already scarce but he couldn't cut it off entirely, nor rely on the pity of his fellow actors to feed his sorry ass in order to save up enough money to buy the newest trendy fashion item, bag or jewelry ;o; As a result, his girlfriend was in a constant state of moodiness, her feelings dwindling as her patience was running thin. She'd often accuse Zen of being unfaithful in their relationship and would cause huge scenes as she claimed his love for her was just for show and trickling into nothingness. She was no longer on the receiving end of his unlimited attention which she had been so spoiled to beforehand! Yet, the poor guy kept trying to appease his girlfriend's 'broken heart', proving himself over and over about how wrong her assessments had been and holding onto her like a rained-down puppy, praying for a brighter future together soon.
3.
Shortly after being forced to cut down a lot of his expenses towards her gifts, his lady's true colors showed as her personality almost did a 180 turn.
A day wouldn't go by without her yelling unpleasantries or stuff being thrown towards the actor's body, Zen's lady endlessly barking his ears off about the lack of attention he was giving to her despite the actor answering her every text message as fast as humanly possible and still planning countless dates like before. Heck, he'd somehow managed to meet her 5 times during one week in spite of his extreme exhaustion from his theatre commitments and lengthy musical rehearsals, feeling like he could faint on the spot from being so overworked and damn right famished, yet it still wasn't enough to meet her standards of the 'perfect boyfriend'. Moreover, she'd been constantly criticizing their encounters and how lackluster their dating life (and nightlife) had become ever since he quit his bad boy lifestyle (a.k.a. retired from the gang) which used to make him seem that much more attractive and exhilarating to her!
His cool and fun side was practically gone, a boring homebody zombie person in its wake, quite the sad empty shell of the person he used to be.
And,
Before Zen knew it,
His lady had gotten so bored with the actor's whining and excuses that not even his handsome features could have saved him from being this coldly dumped by her and treated like a complete stranger in the aftermath. Of course, his ex-lady friend didn't bother to directly tell him of her intentions like any decent human being should, Zen painfully finding out about their breakup from online sources – in fact, while skimming over her favorite social media pages, he could spot her newest photographs alongside many unknown men being borderline chummy with her (and hugging her) as they were partying together that night.
And to his horror, their previous couple photos had been deleted from her pages.
His entire presence in her online world had been erased from existence!
And for a long time, Zen had no way to find closure in this outcome for his desperate texting and calling had been met with nothing but silence or –
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*BLOCKED*
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Uff! T-T
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The harshness of their breakup had really shredded his heart and confidence in himself as a man, largely affecting the quality of his musical performances in the following weeks, the Director scolding Zen a lot and painfully picking at the shards of his actual broken heart.
He almost got kicked out of the company because of his mistakes, worse than a rookie's...
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His life was a total fucking mess now!
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So this kindness coming from the R.F.A.'s founders had brought him newfound hope that the road ahead, at least artistically, was the correct one to pursue and that his talents were greatly appreciated by some of the audience members. ^^
Their meeting truly felt like a breath of fresh spring air!
Still,
He was hard to convince in joining the R.F.A., especially after V had introduced the silver haired male to his childhood friend, Jumin, in the hopes of furthering his career and helping Zen progress faster with his acting goals. While the intention from the photographer was honorable and touched his heart, the CEO heir wasn't to the actor's liking one bit, the raven gratuitously commenting on his 'troublesome rebellious past' and bad habits obtained from it as he sensed the smell of tobacco miles away.
Zen had vowed never to be in the same room as that asshole again!
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PTUI!
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Even after rejecting their offer to join the R.F.A., Zen had kept in contact with the couple, Rika often appearing backstage of his shows and showering his performances with praises, slowly building back his destroyed confidence and self-worth. ^^ Secretly, Rika had wished that Zen would change his mind about joining their organization, but Jumin's silver-spoon fed face continued to flash in front of the male's eyes and thus prevented him to join no matter the temptation.
Ah well...
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Rika...
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His heart would flutter a bit too much whenever they'd be in the same room... her positive energy and glowing aura was awe-inspiring and brought him strength~! The actor struggled to calm his palpitations around her – regardless, he behaved when in the same room as her and revealed nothing of his inner thoughts and feelings, Zen simply indulging into a forbidden sensation that only he would know about and none other. ^^
Though,
He did feel his senses going alert more often while outdoors, like he were being followed.
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Quite unsettling...
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~ *3 YEARS AGO* ~
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Being single for an entire year had been tough on the youngster, Zen not accustomed to heading to his apartment directly after work and sitting there alone, without any loving company. Long were the days where his body would heat up as a pretty lady would be lying in his arms and, whilst he'd dearly missed the good memories of such relationships, the worse ones would tarnish the happiest of moments.
His ex-lady had once more become active on his online platforms, bothering the actor relentlessly to rekindle their bond and to continue their relationship from where they'd left off, the girl regretting the way they'd parted ways. She'd been texting him like he had any freaking say in the matter, too... She would also be sending him tens of texts and voice calls to tempt him back into her place, 'cutely' whining how uncharacteristically cold and unresponsive he was towards her. Naturally, Zen was rejecting her weak ass attempts of reigniting those love sparks between them. He wanted nothing to do with the girl ever again, blocking plenty of contacts in the process. Sure, he'd been feeling very lonely and nostalgic with the rush of old memories at the forefront, but the sharp wounds she had inflicted on his heart weren't done healing even after so long.
And while it may not be too obvious, he did have some pride left as a man.
He wasn't going to crawl back in her bed sheets after everything she had put him through... the humiliation and hurt, and intense emotional manipulations...
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*sigh*
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On a positive note – not dating anybody had allowed him to enjoy a delightful amount of stress-free leisure time. He had been able to focus on his other dreams, mostly in the weekends, Zen just crossing off another one from his bucket list~!
It hadn't been long since the actor had signed the papers to get his very own motorbike when he'd received his driver's license too~!
He'd then excitedly shared selfies and photos to his friend groups on various social media platforms and almost everybody wished the actor amazing experiences with his hot new 'two-wheeled babe'~!
Rika and V, however, had a fair chunk of concerns regarding Zen's rash decision which shed light on his still immature mindset. It really wasn't wise to travel by motorbike in cities where the traffic could grow hectic in an instant and could pose terrible risks to one's wellbeing – it wasn't as safe as, for example, driving it in the country side where accidents would be happeningwith much less frequency. It was also during a time when every news outlet would report on the recent statisticsin traffic: the alarming number of people injured or having lost their lives in such accidents had nearly doubled from the previous year, in the exact same month.
Zen's safety had been on their mind... but the silver haired male was really chill about the subject and shrugged off their concerns~!
He wasn't a speedster and would be vigilant in traffic~! *wink emoji*
Regardless of their opinions, the decision was his alone to make and no one could have convinced Zen out of buying the motorcycle. The silver haired boy had fallen deeply in love with riding that specific model and had thought about it ever since his most trustworthy hyung from back in the gang days, Haejung, had allowed the actor to use his own baby for a test run after witnessing the sorry state of the actor post-break up.
And then Haejung would often lend it for further test runs throughout the months~! 3 Until he'd replaced his bike with a newer model, the older male willing to sell that bike to the actor whose eyes lit up like a kid's inside a candy store!
The sensations of freedom and strength the motorcycle was giving him were exhilarating~! 3 3 3
However, on that fateful evening, Zen hadn't been in the right headspace and had forgone all safety measures when the accident had occurred.
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~ *2.7 YEARS AGO* ~
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Empty.
He felt completely empty inside, devoid of any emotions, good or bad.
The silver haired actor had just been presented the shocking news that the lead part, which he had been auditioning for and working so hard to get for the past couple of months, had been snatched away by a newcomer to their company. Apparently, the connections this guy's family brought with him would impact the nature of the production in its entirety and bring forth more attendees at their shows, so the director had molded his decision to the benefit of everybody there.
"No hard feelings, you will get another chance, boy~! Keep working hard~!"
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HAHAHAHAHAHA!
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Wishful thinking from the Director as this 'precious new musical star prodigy' would eventually leave right after the promotions had ended in order to do TV appearances and model in random commercials with glowing reviews.
*sigh*
Again,
Zen had been utterly defeated by the power of money and connections, feeling his efforts over the years arise to nothing substantial.
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Would he ever become recognized for his talents?
Could he never succeed at anything with his strengths alone?
Was having connections and relying on people with money the only way to progress in this business?
Was he really battling against rushing tides, pushed back to square one each and every single time he'd plunge forwards?
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Nothing really worked in the male's favor on any level of existence and he was growing damn right desperate for a change. Zen's personal life was in complete shambles – fuck, he was still waking up pining for that stone hearted harpy! His low income after years and years of constant hard work was a constant strain and slap in the face, the actor struggling to get by every month.
And with this latest news, the passion he carried in his heart for acting was fading dangerously, for the constant failures and rejections in auditions had become too hard hitting on his aching soul. Zen had fallen into a deep slump, the clutches of depression strongly hugging him and paralyzing his thoughts.
The only good thing left in life right now,
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Was his motorbike.
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So, he'd done what any sane person would while there was a downpour in the city.
Drive in the heavy rain without his full protective gear, other than his helmet. (please do not attempt this at home)
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*VROOOOOOOM*
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The actor didn't realize that he had been crazily speeding until he couldn't avoid the guardrails from the corner anymore, unable to control bike enough to avoid a frontal collision with it.
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*SCREEEEEEEEEEEEECH*
*THUD*
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*PIT-PAT PIT-PAT PIT-PAT*
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Pathetic...
He was so pathetic...
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*PIT-PAT PIT-PAT PIT-PAT*
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Somehow, dying whilst doing something he'd enjoyed didn't seem like such a terrible way to go...
His only wish though...
Selfishly...
Was to have had more days left on this earth... ^^
A second chance at living more earnestly, maybe even ridding himself of his teenage vices and improper, immature behaviors...
Make amends to those he had hurt throughout the years and to those he had coldly abandoned, without a glance in return...
Apologize for being a terrible, disappointing son who had run away from home right before an important family celebration marking his brother's success in entering a good law firm, not bothering to once call home ever since to give his family at least a semblance of comfort that he wasn't lying dead in a ditch...
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Like now~!
LMAO!
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Shit...
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And who knows...
Maybe if someone out there was listening to his desires...
Zen would really like a second chance...
To find someone who'd be patient enough with him and his endless short comings...
And who would fully support his dream and cheer him up on bad days, cry with him on the better ones when he'd achieve new milestones with his acting...
And take care of his heart...
With a bit more care than those before...
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And Zen would promise that he would be taking care of her heart in return.
Forever.
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^.^
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*PIT-PAT PIT-PAT PIT-PAT*
*SPLASH SPLASH SPLASH*
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Too late for regrets now...
The light was getting closer...
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"HYUN!"
"ARE YOU AWAKE?!"
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Eh...?
Mint... eyes...?
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"HYUN?! THANK GOODNESS YOU'RE STILL BREATHING!"
"PLEASE, STAY WITH ME!"
"HELP IS ON THE WAY!"
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Those were his last memories before officially joining the R.F.A., soon after his ungodly fast recovery while being stuck in the hospital for two entire weeks.
Zen couldn't have been more thankful and indebted to V and Rika, and everything they had both done for someone as unworthy and troublesome like him.
They were his guardian angels on earth,
Giving him the second chance in life that he'd desperately needed and prayed for while bleeding out on the barren ground.
And he wasn't going to waste their precious gift~!
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Even if that meant facing the annoying CEO heir and being in the same room with him at parties,
And his bloody menacing fur ball.
*SNEEZE*
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~ *PRESENT* ~
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Since then,
Zen's motorbike accident had remained a rather well-kept secret of his, known only by those in the R.F.A. and Haejung, who nearly chewed the silver haired male off when he'd discovered this by chance. The motorcycle he'd sold to the actor had been brought in for repairs to a buddy of his who'd called the man quite terrified of his supposed injuries.
Not even his most passionate of fans (minus Jaehee) had been aware of the ins-and-outs of that night which marked the beginning of his sudden hiatus from the theatre and online platforms in general. There had been a lot of speculation despite some hushed rumors floating around which no one dared believe because the reason of his untimely absence was claimed to have been an array of plastic surgeries to enhance his beauty. Those type of rumors would quickly be refuted, obviously, with fans posting numerous threads of his selfies shown from before the hiatus in comparison to those after, remaining shocked at how little differences they would see.
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Apart from a glow-up of his smiles and heightened mood~!
LMAO!
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Apparently, V had taken extra measures to ensure that no one from the press got ahold of any information regarding his accident, the photographer somehow having direct ties to the owner of the hospital and the investigating policemen. Plus, he'd also contacted Zen's company and persuaded them not to let him out of a job because of his disappearance.
Alas,
Mina was part of the R.F.A., but Zen had stupidly overlooked that information of her not knowing this detail about his past since it wasn't information she could have researched in a fan cafe post.
Like she obviously did with various other info~! *winks*
So when her features suddenly contorted into a frightened expression, he knew that he'd screwed up, the girl becoming ever more panicked of the tumble 'she had caused' and which might have triggered his body to activate some lingering trauma from the accident. Zen was super apologetic about her feeling so bad because of him as it wasn't his intention to cause her any distress on this joyous night –
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*BUZZ BUZZ BUZZ BUZZ*
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But no matter what he'd do to calm her down (even showing in her plate another yummy fish bread~!), it would be in vain, her worries instead multiplied as the caller on her phone screen made its appearance.
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*audible gulp*
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Her mother.
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End note:
Anyway, I've always imagined that Zen didn't have the easiest life since escaping his household and it sort of determined him to join a gang. (money wise. And I've often wondered why he would ever break up with any girlfriend in the past, considering his personality in-game and how damn clingy he still is with MC during the bad endings, willing to stay in toxic situations with a heartless girl. So maybe the previous break ups were never his choice in this regards.
Ah well,
Also,
Damn, I keep loving the MysMe manhwa and the artist is drawing Zen so, so beautifully 3 my fav picture of him is the last panel artist drew in chapter 5.
I strongly urge people to read the official English version on Tappy toon. Guys. GUYS! You can unlock the chapters for free, yo! Especially after u download the app on phone and, literally, all you have to do to get some currency is to complete some offers (watch video ones in my case. Complete 30/30 per hour it says and you get 300 currency every time it refreshes i believe, still hadn't fully tested it xd). I believe every chapter needs 300 currency to unlock without spending any dime.
So, please support the artist and author so we can get more beautiful artwork ^o^~!
