"Now remember, you have to keep what I told you to yourself," Xander told the two as they parked the quad runners next to the ship.
"That means I'd have to lie to Zoe," Wash pointed out, "my lovely and dangerous wife. The wife I made certain promises to when we got married. Those are sacred vows!"
"You don't have to keep it quiet forever," Xander assured him, "just for a little while."
"I can keep secrets for a little while," he admitted with a slow nod. "Unless someone reads them from my mind and tells everyone," he said with a pointed look at River.
River rolled her eyes. "I wasn't exactly in my right mind and you wanted her to know what the present was even more than she wanted to know, so naturally I told her so you'd both feel more comfortable."
"That… makes a lot of sense," Wash admitted thoughtfully. "I can see where anticipation and excitement could read like that."
"Good, I only need you to keep quiet for a week at most," Xander told him.
Wash looked uncomfortable. "An entire week?"
"Make him taller and he'll go for it," River told him.
Wash perked up, a smile growing on his face. "That would make a big difference," he admitted.
Xander wet his thumb and ran it across the pilot's forehead, causing his form to swell and his clothes to tighten as he shot up nearly a foot in height and half that in width.
"Tah mah duh hwoon dahn!" Wash cursed as he tore at his pants and shredded his shirt, falling over as he struggled to remove the much too small clothes, tearing his heavy denim pants as if they were made of paper.
"It didn't do that with me," River noted.
"You wore looser clothes than he does," Xander replied with a shrug. "Also, I made him stronger and tougher than he would have been naturally."
"That…" Wash said slowly as he regained his feet, before falling silent as he examined himself. "Tsai boo shr," he muttered with a slowly growing smile.
"That good for a week?" Xander asked with a grin.
Wash flexed his newly grown muscles, causing his shirt to split open. "I have no idea what you are talking about, this is just the results of fresh air and exercise." He grinned widely, standing there in his slightly too small boxers and the remains of his Hawaiian shirt.
Xander grinned and handed the barely dressed man a roll of gold coins.
"Gwai-gwai long duh dong!" Mal exclaimed as he and Zoe approached the four.
"Wash?" Zoe asked cautiously.
Wash smiled at his wife. "I've been working out lately," he lied, "I'd hoped to keep it from you until I had some decent results to show for it."
Xander handed him another roll of gold coins with a grin.
Zoe just stared at them for a moment. "I'm not going to ask," she decided, eyes running up and down her husband's form.
"Care to share anything about…" Mal trailed off and shrugged, gesturing at the forests that now surrounded the small town.
"It's a very nice planet, with a very rapid growing season," Xander offered.
"Yeah, that works," Mal said, tossing a roll of gold coins to Xander who caught them and stared at them for a moment before bursting out laughing.
"We better get you inside," Zoe said, grabbing her husband's arm and pulling him towards the ship, "can't have you wandering around half naked heatin' up the women folk."
"Heatin' up the women folk?" Wash questioned with a grin, recognizing his wife's tone and eagerly following her.
"Your robot girls really do resemble River," Mal said as he noticed the cyborg standing quietly behind the two.
"Cameron does," Xander told him, "the rest look completely different."
"She made good time getting here," Mal said. "Must have been a courier ship we missed."
Xander grinned and handed him the roll of gold coins back and another one besides. "She was always good at finding her way around the verse."
"We should go visit the clinic," River told Xander. "my brother and Kaylee are there. So, you can heal the sick colonists and we can pick up Kaylee and my brother, that way the Captain can go back to watching Inara."
"I'm not…" Mal trailed off at the amused look on River's face and straightened his jacket. "I'm not going to dignify that with a reply, I'm just going to go back to my drink," he said before turning and striding off.
"He's got a girl here?" Xander asked with a grin.
"No, but yes," River said and took a deep breath. "See, Inara and him have a thing, a huge thing, an awkward thing, a different worlds but fit together thing. Inara was a Companion, which is like a social position that sometimes requires sex, but is usually just looking pretty in social situations and giving advice to people with more money than sense. Being a bit old fashioned and very jealous with little control of his tongue when he's upset he has said some horrible things to her. Thankfully she's a lot more mature than he is, and has had extensive training in psychology so she knows he doesn't really mean it and is just being a mouthy bitch because he cares. Unfortunately, she also gets emotional and loses sight of that for a second and lashes out at him in return. She would retire from being a Companion and just be one of the crew but… that's a secret, so I can't tell you, even though I wish I could because it'd make things so much easier, but I swore on my pinky and being a reader I've got to have some limits and my pinky seems like a good one," she rattled off at high speed.
Xander stared at her while she breathed heavily, obviously out of breath from getting all that out in a single breath. "Is there something I can do to fix all that without having to understand it or learn whatever secret your pinky is holding?" he asked hopefully.
River considered that, chewing on her bottom lip for a second. "I could ask her, that would probably be the best thing to do. She's reading to children in the saloon, so this won't take long."
Xander looked at the town as River hurried him towards the saloon with Cameron following quietly behind them. If not for the spaceships parked in the fields he was sure this town would have fit in to any cowboy movie he had ever seen. It had been a bit of a surprise to find how low tech the majority of the town was, but considering how little resources they had to work with he could understand the reason for it. He was still split on whether they adopted the look of a Midwestern town because it was practical for the amount and type of materials they had to work with or they just liked the aesthetic.
The town was mostly empty as the population was out examining the forest that had sprung up in the last couple of hours, so no one interrupted them on the way to the saloon. As they pushed open the swinging saloon doors, Xander decided it had to be a conscious decision to mimic the old west as he couldn't think of another reason to have those doors as he was pretty sure they were just movie props and hadn't existed in real life and sure enough the inside of the saloon looked just like he'd seen in the movies, tho' the only people present were Mal and the beautiful woman with dark hair he was talking with in the nearly empty bar.
"Inara!" River called out with a broad smile on her face.
"River," she replied with a smile, opening her arms to receive a hug that the younger woman was quick to take advantage of.
River whispered something in her ear as they held one another, getting a shocked look and a quickly whispered response.
"Fancy meeting you here," Mal said dryly, before taking a sip of his drink, obviously annoyed at his conversation being interrupted.
"River said it was important and something about a pinky promise," Xander told him. "I figure they'll let us know what it's about in a minute or so."
"You healed River," Inara said, "something I thought almost impossible. How… extensive is your ability to heal?"
"Complete," Xander told her bluntly.
"What about a genetic disease that degrades the nervous system?" she asked intently, Mal freezing as he started thinking about why she would ask that and connecting it to why she was being so stubborn about not joining the crew.
"Complete regeneration, but it probably won't remove it," Xander said thoughtfully. "I mean, it's genetic… so maybe on that."
Inara sighed shoulders slumping.
"Not that it matters," Xander quickly assured her. "I can set it up so you receive that level of healing once a day, so unless it is the fastest degeneration disease ever, you can pretty much ignore it."
Inara looked towards River who nodded, letting her know he was being truthful. "Please!" she begged Xander.
"Of course," Xander quickly assured her, licking a thumb and wiping it across her forehead, deliberately giving her Regeneration and triggering it, causing her to shudder and her form to swell slightly.
"Not that big a difference," River noted, as Mal stepped forward to provide support for Inara, whether she needed it or not.
"She probably had a healthy diet and did all the right things to gain her full potential growth throughout her life," Xander explained as he clasped his palms together and bright green light leaked through the cracks between his fingers.
"Are you okay?" Mal asked urgently, ignoring the others.
"I feel great," Inara said with a wide smile, before taking a deep breath and holding out a hand, palm down. "Not a tremor," she said in amazement.
Xander handed her an emerald necklace, much to her confusion. "Just keep it somewhere safe and don't let it get destroyed. Once a day you can trigger a regeneration cycle. I suggest just before bed, but you can use it if you stub your toe if you want."
"Thank you," Inara said gratefully, at a loss for words as to what else she could say unable to believe the miracle she'd just been granted before turning to Mal. "I'd appreciate an escort to my shuttle. I think we both could use… a spot of tea."
Mal smiled then frowned and winced. "Healing of this type makes people… excitable," he said. "They get a touch hormonal and it takes a bit to wear off, like being drunk."
Inara just smiled serenely. "I don't believe my plans for what I was going to do if I was ever cured has changed in the slightest." She slid her arm around his. "Unless you have any objections?"
"No," Mal quickly blurted out, "I don't believe I have any objections."
"Good, now that, that is taken care of let's see to the healing of the sick people in the clinic," River ordered Xander.
"In a rush?" Xander asked.
"It's almost lunch time and you promised me sex after," she reminded him. "I haven't had enough sex that I'm gonna pass that up and you've been teasing me since we woke up."
"I've been teasing you?" Xander asked, surprised.
"Yes, you have," River agreed. "You are very aware of me and keep thinking nice thoughts about me as the cloud around your mind has faded!"
"Why are there two Rivers?" Inara asked, as she spotted Cameron. "Ignore that, I can find out later. Mal, let's go before we get interrupted by something."
"Yes ma'am," Mal agreed and quickly left with her.
"I'm not thinking nice thought about you because I am trying to tease you, that's just what I think of you," Xander told her. "Let me pop another blue mana so you don't have to hear them until after lunch."
"No!" River exclaimed, before forcing herself to sound casual, "I mean, I don't mind. I'm used to hearing thoughts and it's a bit distracting not to."
"Alright," Xander said, as she took his arm and pulled him towards the door.
The clinic, such as it was, was in the church just down the road. It was a nice church and looked exactly as Xander expected it to from all the cowboy movies he'd watched as a kid right down to the bell tower on top. He was now heavily leaning towards the idea that whoever set up these colonies were big fans of cowboy movies.
Shepherd stood at the altar, helping calm sick children as Simon gave them injections while Kaylee took care of the older colonists. The three stopped and stared as River entered with Xander and Cameron.
"Why is there two of my sister?" Simon asked.
"This is Cameron," Xander explained, "one of my girls."
"Oh," Simon said the confused look on his face fading as he recalled why River and Jayne had kidnapped him in the first place. "Are you here to help with the sick?" he asked, wondering how many people Xander could heal without straining himself.
"Yes," Xander agreed quickly coming up with a plan from his surroundings that should hide his actions. "Shepherd, if you'd care to lead us in a quick prayer, I'd appreciate it. It's been a while since I've managed to see the inside of a church."
Shepherd Book smiled. "I'd be glad to." He turned to the colonists. "If everyone would care to bow their head for a moment. Lord, please bless and guide us in these trying times-" the prayer was interrupted as a wave of light rolled over the congregation causing them to start and look around in shock.
"My back," an old woman said in wonder, "it doesn't hurt anymore."
"My arm don't hurt anymore," a young boy said, "and I ain't coughin' neither!"
"It's a miracle!"
Xander wasn't sure who yelled it out, but the rest of the crowd quickly agreed and the formerly injured and sick practically danced out to find their families and share the good news, leaving Xander whistling nonchalantly and trying to look innocent.
Shepherd cautiously approached him. "I'm feeling decades younger and I saw folk who were missing body parts, fingers or eye, not whole limbs, just walk out of here with them returned and a lot of the grey in their hair missing. Are you…" his voice trailed off.
"He's just a powerful reader of some type we haven't heard of," Simon told him.
Shepherd shook his head. "This is beyond anything even theorized on readers," he said seriously.
"He healed River," Simon said firmly, "if he wants to claim to be a frog wearing a human suit, I will run around catching flies for his lunch. He says he's a reader so as far as I am concerned, he is one."
"Simon makes me really proud at times," River told Xander quietly, but easily loud enough for the others to hear, causing Simon to blush and look away.
"I'm impressed," Xander told her. "Remind me to do something good for him."
"The rest of the crew agreed," Kaylee told Shepherd, "he's just a really powerful reader as far as we're concerned."
"I don't recall that meeting," River complained.
"You have been… preoccupied," Kaylee said with a grin.
"I've been having sex," River said with a broad smile, enjoying how uncomfortable it made everyone.
"Which explains why you didn't know," Xander agreed, trying not to laugh.
"I can understand and even agree," Shepherd offered, "but I'm still having a bit of a religious crisis here."
"As far as I know, the creator is the same being it has always been and being a decent person is rewarded in the afterlife," Xander told him. "I like to think I'm a decent person, but I'm not an angel or any higher power regardless of any abilities I may have. Does that help?"
"It does," Shepherd decided. "I'll just judge you by your actions, which with few exceptions, seems to be pretty positive if confusing."
"That's what I aim for," Xander said cheerfully.
Cameron stepped outside for a moment before returning. "There is a ship approaching, it is in poor condition and leaking smoke. There is a high probability that a crash may occur. I would suggest retreating into the forest to avoid injury," the T-800 announced.
Naturally this caused everyone to rush outside to see.
Cameron wasn't programmed to roll her eyes, but if she had been this is the point where she would have activated that subroutine.
"Reavers," Kaylee said, paling as she spotted the incoming ship, smoke leaking from the engines and corpses chained to the outside of the ship.
Beta by: Abyssal Angel & Mist of Shadows
