Chapter 29: Things That Go Bump in the Night

"So…"

It was 30 minutes after Kasumi had entered Genma's room late at night. 20 of those minutes were spent by her voicing her desperate, bottled-up concerns to the stoic face of a giant panda. 10 were spent on waiting for the water in a kettle to boil on the anemic hot plate that Genma kept at his bedside.

"So", he repeated, his voice full of cold, quiet fury. Kasumi felt something lick at her ankles, something freezing and fluid and sinuous. She may not have practiced herself, but she was the daughter of an experienced martial artist, so she knew what it was. If she looked carefully, she could even see it:

Seeping slowly from his shoulders and flowing across the floor in viscous tendrils like fog off of dry ice was Genma's ki, cold as the crypt and dripping with anger.

She recalled, once, when she was little, a time when she had knocked over a vase that had been her mother's favorite, back when…

…When she had been alive.

It was relatively soon after her death, and her father was still in the throes of grief, an even more emotional man than he was now. The wave of heat that had radiated off of him when the beloved pottery had shattered could be felt across the room. It had frightened Kasumi at the time, but what that had been was simply the release of the inchoate grief and rage that had become her father's life. Become her life. There had been hugs afterward, and half-sobbed apologies. (And ice cream. That bit had for some reason stuck with Kasumi for a decade at this point.)

This was something different. Genma was not a man wracked by grief, and this wasn't an accidental outburst. This was someone, in full possession of his faculties, getting very, very angry.

What her father had done accidentally in his grief had scared her as a child. What Genma was doing now scared her as a grown woman.

"So my son", Genma continued, his glasses gleaming in the low light from a desk lamp, the only source of illumination in the room. "and that Hibiki boy are cavorting around town like sailors in San Francisco? And Soun is fine with it?"

Kasumi nodded. "I-I thought he must have been oblivious to what was going on, b-but he just told me that the boys weren't doing anything wrong!"

The room dropped a fraction of a degree as Genma's freezing aura flared for a second. Silently, he stood up and walked over to the window, staring at the city skyline. Kasumi could swear she heard him muttering the word "soft" under his breath.

Unprompted, he asked, "Do you think a child needs a mother, Kasumi?"

"W-what?"

"A mother", he repeated. "Listen, I'm sure Soun did his best to raise you girls, lord knows I did what I could with Ranma, but it's clear that something about growing up without a proper mother did something to your sisters."

Kasumi balked. "Mister Saotome, surely you're not implying that I'm—"

"No, no, of course not! You're a fine young woman, Kasumi! But you were old enough when she passed to remember your mother properly. Nabiki was what, 4? And Akane 3? Practically toddlers!" Genma let out a sigh, shaking his head. "It's a damn shame, really."

Kasumi bowed her head, lost in vague memories about days spent with her mother. Shopping, cleaning, cooking, all the things that she had kept on doing once she had passed. I should have done more for my sisters, she thought, something invasive and sinister taking root in her brain. I should have done something.

"But… but I was only six, what could I have done?" she asked herself, her voice not rising much above a whisper.

"Hm?" Genma asked, looking at her over his shoulder. "What was that, Kasumi?"

"N…nothing, mister Saotome", she said. "Um, if you don't mind me asking…"

Genma's expression, or at least what was visible behind his glasses, was unreadable. He merely gave Kasumi a nearly imperceptible nod, a sign that she may continue.

"U-um, I was wondering why you took Ranma on your training trip at such a young age? I-if a mother is so important for a child to grow up… correctly, that is."

Genma merely stared at her silently for an uncomfortable amount of time, before inhaling slowly and deeply, sighing as he turned back to the window.

"While a mother is certainly an important part of the life of any child, it's a bit… different for girls and boys. For boys, a mother should be a caretaker first…" Genma turned around, his glasses once again catching the light and gleaming ominously. "...and role model distant second. Ranma, as you might have guessed by his 'proclivities', spent an awful lot of time around his mother. Hell, the boy even started imitating her! My dear Nodoka noticed, and decided to give me an ultimatum: make Ranma into a real man, or…"

After he trailed off, he saw Kasumi leaning in, listening in rapt attention.

"...Or what, mister Saotome?" she asked.

"...Or both Ranma's life and mine would be forfeit. She made us sign a suicide pact, Kasumi."


Kodachi opened her eyes and blinked as soft pinkish-red light suffused through her room, the late morning sun being diffused through her drawn curtains.

Goodness, what time is it? She thought, yawning and attempting to stretch before finding that her left arm was being pinned to the bed by one Akane Tendo. After a second of battling her morning brainfog, she remembered what had happened that had led to this sleeping arrangement and blushed profusely.

Gently, she lifted her girlfriend enough to slip her arm out from under her without waking her and padded quietly out of her room, only to find Shampoo doing the same thing a couple of doors down.

The two girlfriends stared at each other for a second, their trains of thought following a similar track; one that resulted in both of them turning bright red and simultaneously trying to nonchalantly break eye contact.

"...So—" Kodachi began in an attempt to break the silence, before being cut off.

"I-it was an accident!" Shampoo stammered, waving her hands. "W-with the vase! Shampoo promises!"

"...Vase?" Kodachi said with a confused blink. "Shampoo, darling, what are you talking about?"

"... Kodachi did not hear the sound of Yoiko turning into piglet and squealing in shock last night?"

Kodachi guiltily recalled the sounds from her own room that she was worried had carried through the walls last night. "Uh, no. We, were, um. Asleep."

"Oh, I see." Shampoo said. However, just as Kodachi began to relax, she followed up with "And this would be after the very loud sex, yes?"

If this had been a comedic manga, this conversation would have been happening over breakfast, and Kodachi would have a mouth full of orange juice or coffee or something to spit out and start choking on. Unfortunately, both girls had woken up just barely on the right side of noon, and were still standing in the hallway, with no drinks in hand.

She had to settle for a mortified gasp. It just wasn't the same.

"Oh, god." she moaned. "Just kill me now and be done with it."

Shampoo leaned into her girlfriend and got onto tiptoes, planting a kiss on her cheek. "Airen is so uptight! Kodachi should be more comfortable discussing these things with her girlfriend."

Kodachi sighed. "I suppose you're right. Oh, before I forget, Yoiko needs to take her hormones. I should wake her." She walked over to the guest room door, only to find herself blocked by Shampoo.

"U-uh, you let Shampoo get her." the purple-haired girl said, sweating slightly.

"Oh? A-alright…" Kodachi said, before a sudden suspicion took hold of her. Looking over the smaller girl's head and into the room, she saw Ranko and Yoiko, both sleeping peacefully in their cursed forms, with Yoiko nestled comfortably on top of Ranko's breasts. She had, of course, shed her clothing, being both far too small for them and an animal besides.

What was slightly less expected (though, Kodachi reflected, not by that much) was that Ranko was naked as well.

Quickly looking away and shielding her peripheral vision with her hand, Kodachi said, "Ah. Yes. Quite. You go and wake them, Shampoo darling. I'll, um, see to Akane in the meantime."


By the time everyone was awake, dressed, and gathered at the island table in the middle of the Kunos' airy kitchen, it was past noon and Kodachi was fretting about how late she and Yoiko were taking their premarin.

"Dachi, I'm sure it's fine", Akane reassured her, resting a hand on her girlfriend's arm.

"It's supposed to be every twelve hours." Kodachi fretted. "Not whenever you're up to it! Oh, I've never waited this long to take my morning dose, it's not even morning!"

"U-um", Yoiko said, beginning to catch some of Kodachi's apparently infectious nervous energy. "I-is that a problem? I kinda just take mine whenever I wake up and go to bed…"

"You're fine, Yoiko", came the deep voice of Tatewaki, who walked into the kitchen with Hiroshi in tow, both of them looking tired and mildly annoyed. "My sister is simply something of an anal retentive about her HRT schedule."

Kodachi gulped down her pill and turned to her brother as he poured himself a cup of coffee. "Oh, Tatchi! You're certainly rising late this morning! Usually you'd be training by now, or else doing something out in the town."

"Yes, it's a funny thing", Tatewaki said, without a trace of humor in his voice. "Hiro and I found ourselves kept awake into the early hours of the morning."

None of the assembled girls said a word as he took a long, loud drink of his coffee, instead opting to shoot each other slightly guilty looks.

"Still", he said when his cup was empty. "It's nice to know that you were all able to enjoy yourselves last night. Maybe next time Hiro and I could walk in on some of you, right as you're about to… I don't know, whatever it is lesbians do."

"Hey!" Ranko interjected playfully. "We ain't all lesbians! Some of us like guys. Ain't that right, Yoiko?"

Instead of making any sign that she agreed, Yoiko instead let out a non-committal mumble while scratching her ear.

"...Babe?"

"I… I don't actually know?" Yoiko replied. "I-I mean, I definitely thought I did, back when you were a 'boy', but I haven't really…" Her eyes darted from face to face, silently asking her friends the same question. "...Th-thought about guys like that in a while…"

"Yoiko, it's fine if your sexuality changes as you find out who you are and what you want", Kodachi said, laying her hand on her friend's shoulder. "Why, before I had fully come to terms with being a woman, I must admit I tried my hand at dating 'other' boys, as it were." She stopped abruptly, radiating an incandescent blush and waving her hands. "O-oh, but let's not dredge up such youthful dalliances of mine and instead look to- just what is so funny, brother dear?"

Tatewaki had failed to stifle a loud snort, which had evolved into a full snicker upon his being called out. "Oh, just the idea of my 16-year-old sister describing the advances of her two-years-younger self towards her best friend at the time as 'youthful dalliances.'"

Now red with both embarrassment and anger, Kodachi shoved her brother out of the room as he threw back his head in laughter. "Alright, that's quite enough out of you, Tatchi!"

"Shall I inform Hikaru of his demotion? I seem to recall some drawings of yours that proclaimed him to be your 'first lov—'"

(SLAM)

As Kodachi's shoulders heaved up and down as she panted, Hiroshi made the mistake of opening his mouth.

"Now when Tatchi said 'Hikaru', was he talking about Gosunkugi Hikaru, or—"

"OUT!" Kodachi bellowed, pointing a finger at the door she had just pushed her brother out of. Hiroshi was quick to obey, not wanting to risk the ire of a girl who was definitely able to kick his ass with ease.


It was a short time later. Everyone had gotten washed and dressed, and had as a group stopped just outside the Tendo home. Ranko's hands fidgeted as she clenched and unclenched her fingers and wiped sweat off of her palms until both were grabbed. One by Yoiko, and the other by Kodachi, who gave it a gentle squeeze.

"You're sure you want to do this?" she asked. "I don't want you to if you're not ready."

Ranko took a deep breath and looked at Yoiko, who gulped and nodded. After returning the nod, she said, "Yeah. We're ready."

"Alright", Kodachi said, giving her hand another squeeze. "And if anything goes wrong, if you don't feel safe—"

"I know." Ranko said. She swallowed, her throat feeling unusually dry. "Your place. Guest room. Immediately. Sasuke'll grab our things."

"Alright", Kodachi repeated. "Alright. Let's do this thing, then. Shampoo, Akane?" The two girls in question looked at her in mild surprise. "I need you two to promise that you will have our backs if mister Tendo reacts poorly."

Shampoo set her mouth in a grim line and nodded, but Akane looked hesitant. Kodachi fixed her with a fierce stare.

"Akane." she said in a severe tone.

"I know, I know", she sighed. "Of course I'm here for you. It's just… it's my dad, you know?"

Kodachi pulled her into a sidelong hug. "I do, darling."

Ranko took one more look at the by-now extremely familiar house, encircled by a wall and gate that seemed slightly more… imposing than they had previously. Not by a lot, of course, she could easily jump it if it somehow came to that, but…

She shook her head. It wouldn't come to that, she was sure of it.

"Okay", she said. "Let's get this over with."


Peeking around the corner of the kitchen, Akane spied her father sitting in his usual spot in the living room, reading a book while the TV played the programming equivalent of white noise.

"D-dad?" she asked, walking into the living room.

"Ah, Akane!" Soun said, sticking a thumb in between the pages of his book to keep his place. As the rest of the group filed in, he blinked in surprise. "...And everyone else, it would seem." Bouncing back quickly, he asked, "Well, to what do I owe the pleasure, girls? Oh, pardon me boys, you as well."

As Soun let out one of his signature jovial chuckles, Ranko and Yoiko exchanged a look. Taking a deep breath, she braced herself as she said, "Uh, yeah. About that, mister Tendo… Um, is there anyone else here?"

Cocking an eyebrow, Soun picked up the remote and muted the TV. "Weee-e-elll, Nabiki is upstairs, but I have a feeling that's not who you mean." All of the teens shook their heads. "Right, well, both Genma and Kasumi are out of the house at the moment. Feel free to tell me anything." He began to chuckle again. "Though, after all the big confessions I got yesterday, I can't imagine what else you could have hidden. You haven't killed anyone, have you?" He laughed uproariously at his own joke, before noticing the grim and anxious expressions on everyone's faces. "...Y-you haven't killed anyone, have you?"

"Wh- NO!" Ranko shouted.

"Sorry! Sorry", Soun said, waving his hands conciliatorily. "Forgive me for thinking that was worth a chuckle."

"With… all due respect, mister Tendo", Kodachi said, stepping forward. "None of us are exactly in the mood for jokes." She steeled herself with a deep breath through her nose. "Last night, when Akane called you, you inquired as to which of my brothers was present. Might I ask… might I ask precisely who you think my brothers are?"

With a bemused grin, Soun looked from side to side as if checking for hidden cameras before answering. "...Is this a trick question, Kodachi? I was talking about your brothers Tatewaki and Kodai, of course."

Kodachi inhaled sharply, features screwing up as if in anticipation of being struck. Wordlessly, she dug through her purse, pulling out her wallet and taking a card from it.

"Here", she said, proffering it to him. "Please, take a good look."

Soun held the card gingerly. "Is this… a student ID card?" he asked, thoroughly confused. "Kodachi, why did you give me your— wait…"

Squinting, he brought the card closer to his eyes, his brow furrowing. Kodachi simply stood there, resolute.

"Kodachi, would you mind telling me why you're carrying your brother's student ID?"

"It is not my brother's ID, mister Tendo." she said, her voice fighting to remain level. "It is mine."

Soun had stared at the ID for a long time. A very long time. When he was done staring at the card he moved on to staring at Kodachi, and at Akane beside her. His eyes drifted downward, to two hands intertwined so tightly it was difficult to tell which one belonged to who.

Or it would have been, he thought, If Akane's and Kodachi's hands were anything remotely approaching the same size.

That was the thing he found himself repeatedly thinking as he listened to Kodachi's explanation of who she was. Every time his eyes rested on what should have been a familiar feature he found his eyes lingering, studying…

dissecting.

Disgusted with himself, he gave his head a minute, almost imperceptible shake in order to stop thinking like that just as his daughter's girlfriend finished up her speech.

"...And so, mister Tendo, that is who I am." Kodachi said. She was red in the face and breathing deeply, as though she had recently been exerting herself. And, Soun supposed, she had been. Just in an emotional sense rather than a physical one.

"This is all… quite a lot to take in", he said finally.

"I understand." Kodachi said. "But we all felt it was the right time to come out to you, mister Tendo. And I thought it would help things go more smoothly if I went first."

"You don't need to understand how I feel", she continued as Soun slowly got up out of his chair. "All I ask is that you accept me as, as— EEP!" Kodachi found herself letting out a startled gasp as the older martial artist enveloped her in a warm hug.

"You have made my little girl so happy, Kodachi", Soun said, eyes beginning to fill with his trademark waterworks. "How could I possibly deny that you're a woman when you're clearly the girl of Akane's dreams?"

Equal parts embarrassed and elated, Akane threw herself into the hug that her father and girlfriend were sharing. "Daaaaad!" she half-laughed, half-cried. "Stop, you're embarrassing me!"

As both Soun and Kodachi began laughing and the atmosphere of the room lightened considerably, Shampoo. Ranko and Yoiko shared a smile.

"Now…" Soun said, pulling away from the hug. "What was it you were saying about being 'first', Kodachi?"

Yoiko stepped forward. "Um, she meant that we", she pointed at herself and Ranko, "...are girls too. Girls like Kodachi, that is." She gave him a nervous grin.

"Yep! Yoiko and I are trans too!" Ranko said. "Glad you're so understandin' about all this, mister Tendo!"

Soun stared in shock for a moment, before he began to chuckle softly. The chuckle evolved into a full-throated laugh, at which point the Tendo patriarch proceeded to list to one side, eventually losing the battle with his equilibrium and keeling over onto the coffee table, breaking it in two.

As the assembled polycule stared at him in horror, the sound of a door opening and closing could be heard from upstairs, and before long Nabiki poked her head out from the stairwell.

Taking one look at the scene before her, she sighed in exasperation.

"Seriously? You should have at least made sure daddy was sitting down when you told him."