Disclaimer: I am not British, nor a middle-aged woman. So, unfortunately, Harry Potter doesn't belong to me.


Daring greatly means the courage to be vulnerable.It means to show up and be seen. To ask for what you need. To talk about what you are feeling. To have the hard conversations.

- Brene Brown


Chapter : James and Sirius Recount

Words : 1852

"Peter!" Sirius whispered. His eyes flicked to little Harry who was happily and blissfully asleep after the ordeal.

"Yeah. Guess babes do know, eh?" James tried to joke.

Sirius gave him a small smile. "What happened to the house. How did you escape?"

And then that was explained. Lily went and placed Harry on Sirius' bed and made a pillow fort around him so that he doesn't tumble down. By the time she made a cup of tea and something to eat, James had recounted everything that happened to Sirius.

"I was so scared," Lily heard when she was about to open the door to the living room. "I thought I can't stop him. Then he would have killed them. Lily escaped by,...by a hair's gap. If I... If.."

"Shh..," she heard, "It's okay, Prongs. Nothing happened. Nothing will happen. Cry, mate. It's okay. It's just me. Let it all out."

And then she heard the soft sobs. Lily herself had been scared out of her wits. Even she had thought James won't survive. But hearing him cry, hearing James cry. That James who didn't cry even at his parents funeral, it made everything all the more real. Their family would have been destroyed. It was luck that saved them and maybe Harry's distrust in Peter. After all, without it they may not have made a second plan, right?

She placed the tray on the counter and slid down. She allowed her own tears to flow and closed her eyes listening to James' sobs.

It had been one hell of a Halloween.

James wasn't sure when he had fallen asleep, but he opened his eyes and realised he was curled up on Sirius's sofa, leaning onto him.

"Sirius?"

"Yeah?"

"Where are Lily and Harry?" He asked.

Sirius gently carded his hair. James should have been embarrassed, but he felt nothing of the sort.

Merely a sudden pang as he remembered his own dad. He would have also done the same thing. Another thing he had lost in the war.

"They are upstairs, mate. Safe." Sirius assured.

"Hmm.."

"James?"

"Yes?"

"What now, Prongs? What are we going to do?" Sirius asked

James lifted his head from his best friends shoulder and straightened. He gave him a small smile.

"Sorry about that," He mumbled sheepishly, pointing to the drying patch on his shoulder.

Sirius rolled his eyes. With a wave of his wand the tear stains dried up and his clothes straightened.

"There!" He said with a small smile on his face. "I have destroyed the last proof of the fact that James Potter cried like a baby on my shoulder."

James scowled, though there wasn't much heat behind it, "I don't cry like a baby! I cried like a man."

Both of them chuckled. In the many years they have known each other, James had held Sirius this way several times, as he cried about the hopelessness of his house and the situation there. For once the role had changed, and James didn't particularly care.

Family takes care of each other. His mum used to say. I will do anything for my family! That is how it has always been for me.

And Sirius was family. He knew it.

But this was not the time to be silly and stupid. Peter was still alive. They don't know where Remus is. And what the hell happened to Voldemort? So he straightened.

"Siri, we need to find out what happened to Voldemort."

Sirius nodded. "And if he is dead?"

James' eyes travelled around the familiar room as he thought. He knew that the pretty blue curtain had a yellow burn mark on it when one of their silly experiments went wrong. He knew that the rug underneath his feet had a loose board and that it contains many of Sirius's secrets. Secrets from others, not from James.

"If he is dead, we leave Britain." James decided.

For a second Sirius stared at him, then a small smirk came on his face.

"Don't want people calling you the Messiah?" He asked.

James snorted, "More like 'All bow down to the slayer of Voldemort!'"

They laughed.

"And if he is not dead?"

James smirked. "Then we will be the proper marauders and roam from one place to another and keep moving. You get married to another lady plunderer and have kids with her, then Harry won't have friends problem either." He gave an exaggerated sigh and dreamy looks, "And then we will wander the world, seeing and exploring new places, stealing and plundering from people like death eaters."

Sirus burst out laughing. "Will you say I am evil if I tell you that, for one second I wished Voldemort didn't die so that we can go gallivanting around the world?"

"Nah! I won't say it." James said with a grin.

"Why, you sodding berk!"

This felt good. As if everything was alright. James knew that in a few seconds, everything would come back in a rush. And he would be angry, anguished and all sorts of other things, but for the time being it felt good.

"James, I need to tell you something."

There goes a good time! Because Sirius's tone was...well, serious.

"Yeah?" James' hands carded his hair own their own accord.

"Erm...well...I don't think Voldemort is really gone."

Now James was confused. How did Sirius know that? What does he even mean?

"I don't.."

"I know!" Sirius stood up and began pacing. Fast.

"I didn't understand anything at first too. Things were happening too fast. Nothing made sense. And then, he was so ill. So so so damn ill. I had to do something. I know I have always said that I hate him. And I did. Because he did everything that they wanted, you know.."

James stood up and firmly held Sirius by his shoulder, "Mate. Relax. Take a breath. You don't make any sense. Relax and tell me from the beginning."

Sirus closed his eyes. James didn't miss the way his hands were shaking or his telltale of nervousness - chewing his lower lip. And a nervous Sirius was making James nervous.

Taking a deep breath, Sirius opened his eyes.

"I found Reggie, Prongs. And he was on the verge of death."

Of all the things, this was not something James expected. So he thought that his confusion was acceptable.

"Reggie? You mean Regulus? What about him? Didn't you say he was a death Eater?" His asked, his brows furrowed in confusion.

Sirius took another deep breath. "Hold tight, mate. It is a long story."


Sirus was in his room, fast asleep when he felt his wards breech. He jumped up, alert and ready. It shouldn't have been possible, really. He had made sure to put on the best wards possible and the only people keyed into it were James and Lily, thus by extension, Baby Harry, if he came with them. Not that either of them had visited him ever since they went to hiding. But they were family and he couldn't leave them out from the wards, just in case. Not that his other friends weren't. But with the traitor in the middest, he didn't know whom to trust.So it was with quite a big deal of distrust that Sirius crept out of his bedroom. When he reached the living room, he found, what he assumed was the reason for breached wards. A squirming bundled.But what he recognised without a fraction of doubt was the house-elf. Kreacher!

"Master must wake up, master. Kreacher will try his best master. Kreacher knows Kreacher didn't obey master's orders and leave master there. But Kreacher will punish him later. Now Kreacher must try his best to save master. Kreacher won't let anyone else hurt, Master Regulus."

Sirus had been stunned on hearing that. Confusion mixed with anger filled his veins. But he had just taken two steps forward, with the complete intention of throttling them and finding out how the hell they came in, that he heard it.

"Sorry! Sorry, mother. Please, mother. Sorry! Sirius...Siri, please don't leave me alone here, Siri. I am scared, Siri. They'll kill me. Please. I'll be good." His brother was whimpering and apologizing utter nonsense.

Sirius felt like someone had plunged a knife into his heart and twisted it. Seeing his brother like this, pleading for him not to leave, apologizing to his mother, he felt grief fill his entire bring.

Only one sentence kept repeating in his mind.

"Bloody hell, Regie, what have you got yourself into?"

He walked up to the two of them. Quite obviously, Kreacher was the first one to see him.

"Master Sirius must forgive Kreacher for coming like this. But Master Regulus is dying," Sirius realised that the old elf was crying, "Kreacher couldn't leave Master Regulus there. Master Sirius must do something."

At that moment, all their previous disagreements were forgotten. All Sirius saw there was his baby brother. His baby who crawled to his bed when he had a nightmare, instead of going to his parents.

And with his Auror training and big brother instincts kicking in, he straightened, pushing his grief aside."Kreacher, he is soaking. Start the bath. A hot bath. I'll bring him along.

"Kreacher immediately straightened, " Kreacher will do that, master Sirius."

Sirius kneeled beside his brother and waved his wand over him, casting a diagnosis spell. The result made him gasp.Many bruise marks littered his body. Bruises made from fingers and hands. And cuts, like scratches all over his body. Some poison was evidently in his system, along with some amounts of water in his lungs. If the wet patch on his carpet was anything to go by, he had clearly drowned.

"What the hell were you doing?" He whispered.He quite literally scooped up his brother in his arms, and ignored his flinch, though it made him frown.

"Please don't go, Sirius. Please. I'll be a good brother. Please don't leave me alone here. I am scared." He kept on whimpering.

Tears filled Sirius's eyes and he blinked to stop it from falling, but to no avail. It was a losing battle."Shh...it's okay Reggie. I won't leave. Never again. I'll take you with me wherever I go, from now on. Shh... No one will hurt you, Lil pie." He whispered, walking up the stairs to the bathroom.

To his astonishment, Regulus seemed to be listening."Never?" He asked in a very soft, vulnerable voice. A voice that had no business whatsoever on his brother. He was the Black heir. The confident, but nerdy boy. Next Lord Black.

"Never" He assured.

"Promise?"

"Promise. On my honour, I promise to be for you as long as you will want me."

Though Regulus seemed to be coming down from the whimpering stage, Sirius noted that whenever he stopped speaking to Regulus, a new round will start. At times apologies for not being a good son. Other times apologising that he was a coward and couldn't kill people as his Lord asked him.

All Sirius had been able to do was bath him, put him in a warm pair of clothes, cast drying charm and ask Kreacher to bring Madam Pomphrey. Then had come, the hardest task - to wait.


So what happened to Regulus? Did Sirius take him in? Can they solved their differences?Does James really mean to leave the country or was he kidding? Find out next week.


Next Week:

James and others meets Polaris, Sirius' ten-year-old brother. Daily Prophet announces Potters to be dead and Sirius as traitor.

Potters and Blacks are annoyed!


Review replies :

sleshachoks : Don't worry. There will be Baby Harry. Some new characters have to be introduced and their dynamics explained and it can't be done without smart, intuitive baby playing his role.Thank you for taking the time to review. Hope you like the rest of the story too.


Comments, reviews and constructive criticism are welcome.Once again, the 'next week' only shows the possibility of what will be shown. Based on the number of words, it can be next chapter or the one after that.

Anika.