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Chapter 29 – Things Fall Apart

Everything faded except the need to protect Konoha. Amaya saw two Sound nin leap from their places among the sleeping crowd and rush toward her, kunai drawn. She ducked a shuriken and responded with one of her own, a much more deadly, precise strike than the one she dodged. Beside her, she could hear Kakashi and Gai dealing with attackers and the thud of dead bodies. The remaining shinobi reached her, but she dispatched him with a swift slice.

She heard Kakashi talking to Sakura once there was a lull in the fighting, but her attention shifted to the arena floor. Genma was pinned against the wall fending off two Oto nin. A gash across his stomach bled a steady stream of red. He was fading fast and the Sound shinobi were opening up more cuts. Amaya summoned Mamoru, jumped into the arena, and after a few hand seals, slammed her hands to the earth. Spikes shot from the ground beneath the enemy nin, skewering them from groin to chin. A blur of white passed her and Haku caught Genma before he fell. The young nin lifted the older as if he weighed nothing.

"I let them get the better of me," Genma said as the former rogue nin carried him to relative safety inside one of the hallways snaking through the arena complex.

"Quiet. No talking until I'm done," Haku commanded while beginning to heal the Jonin's injuries. Amaya appeared seconds later, but one glance from the medic-nin-in-training told her to be silent. She decided to wait outside the hallway, in case more enemy shinobi decided to storm the arena. Though, if she was truthful, it was so no one would see the tears gathering at the corners of her eyes.

Kakashi, covered in blood not his own, found her standing guard. He glanced down the hallway where the glow of Haku's healing could be seen, but he shifted his attention to Amaya moments later. "The Hokage's been taken captive, but Anbu are trying to find a way around the barrier. We're fairly certain that this whole mess is Orochimaru's doing. I sent Naruto, Sakura, and Sasuke, along with Pakkun, after Gaara and the other Sand Genin. Gai and I are going to go see if we're needed elsewhere for the moment, but we'll be back."

She'd never understand why, in that moment, she chose to act. The Copy-nin turned to leave, but Amaya grabbed his hand. When he turned back to her, she pressed her lips against his, his mask preventing true contact. Kakashi froze, unsure of Amaya's intentions and what she might do if he moved.

Finally, the auburn-haired nin pulled away. "Don't die."

"I won't," was the only thing he could think to say. Gai called out to him and he hesitated, not wanting to leave. But he knew his priority should be the safety of the village, so he left without another word.

Amaya watched the Copy-nin go, wondering what he was thinking. Well, that and wondering why she'd just kissed him. Did she really have such strong feelings for him that she was willing to jeopardize her relationship with Genma? She sighed. At least Genma hadn't seen.


All color drained from Genma's face. Haku glanced worriedly at him, but when the Jonin remained silent, the young shinobi let the matter drop. No use probing into something that wasn't his concern.

"All done. Just take it easy for a bit. You'll feel dizzy for a few minutes." The ex-missing-nin helped Genma to his feet, and once the Tokujo could stand on his own, left to make sure no one else needed his attention. The brown-haired nin leaned against the wall, watching Amaya draw closer. Why had she kissed Kakashi? Was she unhappy with him? Did it have something to do with the way he'd treated her earlier? He regretted his words and wished he could take them back.

His thoughts went no further as Amaya leaned against the wall next to him. She smiled at him, but he could see the strain behind it. "Are you all right?" The concern in her voice was genuine as far as he could tell.

"I'm fine. Just a little dizzy. What did Kakashi want?"

"Oh," she said, her eyes sliding from his, "he and Gai are going to go see if they're needed elsewhere, but he said they'd be back."

"Oh, ok." The Tokujo paused before speaking again. "I'm sorry for the things I said this morning. It was wrong of me to force you to tell me you love me if you don't feel that way. Hayate's death…. It reminded me of the dangers of our lives and that I could lose you at any time."

"It's not that I don't…."

Genma knew she now knew he'd seen her kiss Kakashi. The unspoken end of her sentence hung between them like a katana, ready to sever their ties in a heartbeat. Why? Why was this happening to him? Was he simply not meant to be happy? What god hated him? The end of her sentence would change everything. He didn't want to believe they could end this way. Light was starting to shine through the cracks in their relationship, cracks he desperately wanted to ignore. If only they could stay in the dark for a little while longer…. He knew, though, whether either of them wanted to admit it, this was the beginning of the end. There was no turning back.

He could see that she knew it too. Amaya left her sentence unfinished, not sure how she meant to finish it anyway. So instead she kissed him on the cheek, told him to join her when he felt better, and left to stand guard with Haku. Genma watched her go, wondering how many more times she'd walk away from him before she walked away for good.

The enemy came in twos, threes, fours, whatever got past the main line. Amaya fought almost without thinking. She was ignoring her own advice, but she wasn't a Genin. She could handle a little distraction. Genma fought by her side, just as distracted. Both Jonin never noticed the ex-missing-nin covering their mistakes. Hours slipped by. The sound of fighting drifted from the roof of the arena where the Hokage battled Orochimaru. But, eventually, the tide of attackers slowed and finally ceased altogether.

Amaya leaned against a wall, exhausted. Kakashi and Gai had never returned, and while she worried for their safety, she couldn't deny the fact they were Jonin, more than capable of defending themselves. Still she worried.

A shout distracted her and she saw Anbu chasing the Oto nin who'd erected the barrier around the Hokage and Orochimaru. They returned from the failed chase minutes later, joining their fellows who'd already headed into the battleground.

"They won't find him alive," Genma whispered from beside her.

Amaya glanced down at where he sat leaning against the same wall. "What makes you say that?"

"Just a feeling."

"I pray you're wrong," the auburn-haired shinobi replied, though she felt the same. Hope had flowed through her at the sight of the limp body in the arms of one enemy shinobi, but that hope was quickly crumbling to dust. One Anbu emerged from the newly-created trees, and raced toward the Hokage Mountain, where the Elder Council would be taking shelter.

Genma picked himself up, moving closer to her, seeking comfort for the grief he already felt. She let him wrap his arms around her, and she leaned into his embrace. Where had they gone wrong? Why didn't her heart skip a beat when he touched her? Why were her thoughts sharp when his presence used to muddle her mind with happiness?


A familiar silver-haired nin stood in front of the Stone, dressed in black for the Hokage's funeral. Amaya knew she'd find him here, but she hesitated before joining him as a cold rain started to fall. She'd done a lot of thinking in the past day, and though her heart was tying itself in knots, she knew she had to talk to him.

Kakashi didn't glance at her when she came to stand beside him. "I thought we were through. I thought I'd blown all my chances. And then you kiss me."

"I know."

"His voice remained even, though his words grew more passionate. "Since you've been back, you've done nothing but lead me on. Time and time again, I thought that maybe, maybe, this time I'll win her over. But each time, you pushed me away."

"I know." She couldn't keep her voice from shaking.

"And when I've finally accepted that I can't be with you, you kiss me."

Tears dripped down her face, mixing with the rain. "I know."

He turned to face her. "Then why?"

"Because I'm weak."

"Because you're weak? What kind of excuse is that?"

"Not a very good one."

"No, it's not." He lifted her chin and wiped a tear from the corner of her eye, his voice soft. "What're you crying for?"

"Because I'm a terrible person."

"If you're terrible, I'm worse. I couldn't take no for an answer. I thought I knew what you wanted."

"Only because I led you on. My no's were never very firm, even to me." She tried a weak smile, failed, cried more.

Kakashi gathered Amaya into his arms and rested his chin on top of her head as she buried her face in his shoulder. "We've both made a mess of this. You shouldn't beat yourself up over it." He smiled wryly at the irony, since that was exactly what he'd been doing.

Amaya pulled back, but didn't break his hold. "It's not just you, though. I've led Genma on too."

"Have you broken up with him yet?"

"No. Not yet. I'm...waiting...for the right time."

"And what if that time never comes?"

"Then I'll make it the right time."

"Will you?"

Amaya lifted her head higher. "Yes, I will. I won't hurt him for longer than I can help."

"What will you do once it's over?"

Instead of answering his question, she asked one of her own, which in itself was an answer of sorts. "Do you love me?"

"Yes. I always have. As you well know by now, part of me never let go, even when you made it clear you wanted nothing to do with me." Kakashi said, while trying to control the rapid beating of his heart. He couldn't quite bring himself to believe this conversation was happening. He stared into her green eyes. "Do you love me?"

This was the question that had plagued her since the end of the invasion, but her answer, when she could speak, came easier than expected. "I want to."