A/N: Sorry I haven't been posting as much, I've been dealing with a lot personally (plus tons of work lately). Hopefully I'll be posting more now; I'll probably go back to posting once a week. Quick note about this chapter: there's one abuse scene, between Rose and Cal. DO NOT READ IT IF THAT BOTHERS YOU! I've bolded the words at the beginning and end of the scene. Hope you enjoy the chapter!

Chapter 25

~Rose~

April 3, 1910

Philadelphia, Pennsylvania

Life was hard. It always was, and I started to not notice anymore. Father was always working or yelling about something, Mother was always at galas or out with society friends, and I was left alone with governesses, or trapped in my house.

I never noticed that there was something unusual about my family dynamic. I thought every family was like mine, where the parents didn't care about their child and the child acted out, desperate for their parents' attention. Apparently it wasn't. I realized that when I went to finishing school in London, and I found out that some parents actually spent time with their children. I couldn't imagine my parents doing that; my parents really only talked to me to scold me. My father would scold me first. His voice would echo in the hallways as he yelled. My mother would yell at me for making my father angry. I would roll my eyes and escape to my room to read Romeo and Juliet for the thousandth time.

Tonight, I sat at dinner silently, picking at my food, while my parents discussed what to do with me. I had gotten sent home from finishing school for misbehaving, and my father was trying to figure out a way to send me back. My mother sat there, agreeing with anything he said, trying to appease him.

"I just don't understand why she'd do such a thing!" My father's voice boomed. "She has one job: to become a well brought up girl so she can marry a wealthy man. That's all. I just… I don't understand her!"

"When people don't pay attention to you, you'd be surprised by the things you'd do for attention," I mumbled. I looked up to see both my parents staring at me.

"What on earth is she talking about?" My father asked, staring at my mother. I knew he blamed her for my misbehavior, and that my mother dedicated her life to convincing my father that she wasn't responsible for me.

Mother shrugged. "I-I really don't know," she said nervously. "I just don't know what's gotten into her." She glared at me, as if telling me to behave. I rolled my eyes and looked back down at my dinner. I felt anger burning inside of me, as I promised myself that I would never end up like my parents. If I ever had a child, I would spend time with them, tell them how much I loved them, and keep them close. I would do the opposite of what my parents did.

I didn't know how it was possible that my mother could feel such ambivalence towards me. I'd always believed that a mother felt a natural unconditional love for their child, and since my mother didn't feel that way about me, I thought there was something wrong with me.

After dinner, I snuck upstairs to my room. I wondered if my parents knew how deeply their actions affected me, how they made me question everything about my existence. My entire life, I was what they didn't want. My parents wanted a son, and instead they got a daughter. My parents wanted a quiet child, and instead I was outspoken. My parents wanted me to go to finishing school, and instead I was the misbehaving girl who got sent home. Maybe it did have to do with me.

I went to sleep that night and thought more about my life and my parents. I often was haunted by one specific thought: if the two people who should love me unconditionally, who should have the easiest time loving me, didn't love me, would I ever be loved? Even while part of my mind told me that I would, the other part, the part that said I wasn't lovable, overpowered it.

I fell asleep for the night, only waking up once I heard a pounding noise at the door. My eyes flashed open, just as the door opened. Standing in the doorway was my mother, wearing her nightgown and a kimono. I had never seen her not dressed up before; I had only ever seen her wearing a full face of makeup and a fancy dress.

She walked in and sat on the edge of my bed. "Rose, wake up," she shook me, even though I was already awake. "Something terrible has happened."

"What, what is it?" I asked, rubbing my eyes. "What happened?"

"I woke up this morning to all of the maids gathered in your father's room. I didn't know why they were there or what they were doing," she rambled. "He's dead."

That was the first time I had experienced death my whole life. I didn't feel anything, really. I knew I was expected to be heartbroken over his death, but I really didn't feel that way. Still, my mother and I put on an act: we wore black for a week, we cried at his funeral, and she never remarried, since it would be deemed inappropriate.

I wondered, since he was dead, if my mother would treat me differently. There would be no pressure from my father anymore, so maybe she would act the way she wanted to. Clearly, I was wrong.

We only found out later that he had killed himself, trying to spare himself from the embarrassment of losing all of our money and the family business. That was when I found out that everything I had grown up thinking about my father was a lie. He wasn't smart, he wasn't different than any other man I had known. He was a coward, just like the rest of them.

•••

February 10, 1921

Chippewa Falls, Wisconsin

The breaks of the motorcar let out a high-pitched screech, signaling that we had arrived at the train station. The servants climbed out of the car and unloaded our bags. A tear left my eye as I realized that I was about to leave Chippewa Falls forever. I was about to be hundreds of miles away from Jack and Mia, stuck with Cal.

Out my window, I saw the Chippewa Falls inn, where Mia and I first went when we arrived, where I found out that Jack was alive. I remembered the rush of emotions I experienced, the happiness that he was alive, the relief that I had someone nearby that could help me, and eventually, the sadness that he had been there all this time, and I never knew.

Cal and I stayed in the car alone while the servants unloaded our luggage and bought the tickets. I tore my eyes from the inn and stared at him, my arms crossed over my chest. I was slouching, trying to cover the non visible bump. "How did you find us?" I asked. "How did you find out Jack was alive?"

His gaze was even colder than it was in my memory. "Private investigator," he said indifferently. "He asked that I give him the list of all people, alive or dead, that could have something to do with this. Of course, Dawson was at the top of the list." He smirked, still staring at me. "You couldn't have really believed you'd get away with running from me, did you?"

I glared at him for another moment before looking out the window again. No, I didn't believe I'd get away with running. I spent countless sleepless nights worried that Cal would find us, that Mia and I would be dragged back and Jack would end up in prison. Things hadn't ended up that way, and I was incredibly grateful for that, but that didn't mean that this situation was any less painful.

I was going to be back with Cal, pregnant with Jack's child. He hadn't bothered to touch me in years, since he just thought I wasn't worth the effort, but now I was almost sure that he would punish me somehow, once we were alone. Once he found out I was pregnant, I was sure he'd find out soon, things would be infinitely worse. That was alright, I decided. It wasn't really alright, but I was more than willing to sacrifice myself for Mia and Jack.

I did have my concerns about Mia and Jack. Mia would be heartbroken that I was gone, I knew that for sure. One day, though, I knew she'd understand that I did it for her safety and freedom. And one day, I hoped, we'd see each other again. As for Jack, I knew he'd worry about me. I knew he'd worry about Mia, and I knew he'd be heartbroken too, but that he'd shove away that sadness and devote himself to taking care of Mia.

"Sir," Cal's manservant peeked his head into the car. "The train will be arriving soon."

"Yes, thank you," Cal pulled his coat shut and fastened the buttons. He glared at me as he opened the door and exited the car. "Let's go, sweet pea."

I closed my eyes for a moment. I didn't want to go with him. I wanted to get out of the car and run all the way back home. I wanted to sit next to Jack, leaning against him, and have Mia on my lap. That life was over now, as much as I wished it wasn't. I had to do this, go with Cal, for Mia and Jack. Sacrificing myself for Mia was something I was more than willing to do.

I got up out of the car, following Cal to the station. He held out his arm to me, for the sake of appearances, and I took it, with no choice but to allow him to lead me back to the life I'd fought so hard to break free of. I was trapped once more, a porcelain doll being put back on her shelf… a butterfly in it's glass jar.

As we approached the train entrance, I realized I had one last chance to change Cal's mind. I stopped and turned to him, a desperate look on my face. "Please, Cal," I begged. "Please."

He sighed and motioned towards the train. "Get on the train, Rose."

That was it. I had no choice but to follow his instructions, and before I knew it, we were on the train back to Pittsburgh. Cal and I didn't say a word to each other. After all, what was there to say? He didn't want me anymore, I knew that for sure, and I certainly didn't want him.

Cal's parents, on the other hand, turned on me the way Cal did. Once Nathan realized that I would never provide the Hockleys with an heir, he said the same things Cal did: that I had seduced him, that this marriage was a mistake, and, worst of all, that they wasted my fertility on Mia. Elizabeth, who followed anything her husband said, agreed.

Most painful of all was my mother. She treated me the same way the Hockleys did, even though I knew she battled infertility as well. She would be angry at me for leaving, I knew, and that she wouldn't understand what led me to run away. After all, if my father treated me the way Cal treated Mia, she wouldn't do anything to stop it.

I hoped nothing would happen, that I'd simply live a lonely life of sitting silently at dinner, attending functions I had no interest in attending, and spending hours alone in my room. I hoped for anything but Cal's physical and emotional abuse.

I felt a slight flutter in my stomach and remembered the little miracle growing there. I realized that what I wished for would never be possible. Sooner or later, Cal would realize that I was pregnant with Jack's baby, and my life would become a whirlwind once more.

I tried to think of a scenario in which everything would be alright, where this baby could be with at least one parent. At this point, I realized that I was too far gone; there was no way to take me off the path that I was on. This baby, however, could be saved. Perhaps I could convince Cal to let me send the baby to be with Jack. I could lock myself away for the next six months, then have the baby and quietly send it to Jack. After some thought, I realized that Cal would never let that happen. Perhaps I could convince Cal that the diagnosis was not a mistake, but that this was just a miracle. Maybe then, he'd feel like he had no choice but to say that the child was his.

Both solutions made me nauseous. One way, I wouldn't be able to see either of my children, and Jack would be raising two young children all alone. The other way, I was subjecting this child to a life in the Hockley mansion, stuck in the world I worked so hard to free Mia from. I closed my eyes and let one tear slide down my cheek, as I wished that things could work out, just once. They never had, I realized, from my childhood until now, and they probably never would. I'd be forced to stay with Cal until Mia was at least eighteen. That way, he couldn't take custody of her if I ran away. There was a chance he'd try to chase after me, but I wouldn't be as worried, since he would have no leverage.

I had to figure out how to send Jack a letter once I arrived. I had to talk to him and figure out what to do about all of this. I didn't know how I would do it, but I needed to figure something out.

•••

February 11, 1921

Pittsburgh, Pennsylvania

As the train pulled into the station, I could feel the walls tightening around me. Pittsburgh looked darker, gloomier, than Chippewa Falls. Chippewa Falls, despite its freezing winters, felt warmer to me, and I desperately wanted to go back.

Cal had his hand on my shoulder as he pushed me towards the motorcar. I got inside, as did Cal, and we drove back to the Hockley mansion. The gates of the mansion closed behind us, and I knew I was trapped forever.

The doors were opened for us, and I quietly walked inside, tears filling my eyes. As we entered, I remembered standing in the entryway as Mia ran towards me, happy to see that I was home. I remembered that one night, the night of the gala, right before Cal hurt Mia. I remembered how I pushed her to stand behind me so I could protect her from Cal.

I looked to my right and saw the dining room, where Mia would always come find me when she couldn't sleep. I remembered the way she stood in the doorway, the way she gripped my hand tightly as I walked her back to bed, all of it.

"Well hello," a cold woman's voice said, and my head whipped back around to look at her. No surprise, my mother was standing right in front of me. As I turned, Cal was gone, but his manservant was still with me. "Nice to see you back here."

I didn't say a single word. I just stood in front of her and crossed my arms over my chest. Once she realized that I wouldn't answer, she started to walk past me and out of the room. "I just don't understand why you'd do such a thing."

As she continued to walk past me, I grabbed her by the arm and pulled her back so I could look her in the eye. "You don't understand why I'd do such a thing?" I asked, clenching my teeth. "I know you've never cared much about Mia. Hell, you never cared much about me." I held back my angry tears. "That beautiful little girl was dying here, Mother, one day at a time, and I did my responsibility as her mother: I got her out of here. I did my job as her mother. Why the hell couldn't you do yours?"

She stared at me for a moment, not saying a word. I released her arm and walked away, going straight upstairs to my room, to lock myself away for as long as I could.

As I went upstairs, I couldn't help but notice the closed bedroom door right next to mine: Mia's room. Before I could think about what I was doing, I had opened the door and walked inside. The shades were shut and the lights were off, but I could still see everything around me. Her bed was made, the lavender bedspread tightly tucked on all four sides, and her pillows fluffed and placed on top. I picked one up, holding it in my arms and inhaling, surprised that it still smelled like her. Tears filled my eyes as I placed the pillow back down on the bed and turned my attention to the pile of stuffed animals in the corner.

I picked up the one on top. It was a normal teddy bear, one that I bought her. I knew that this was her second favorite, that she played with it every day, but her favorite was always the stuffed bunny. The stuffed bunny had been mine when I was a child, and I always wanted to give it to my daughter. It made me happy to know that Mia loved it as much as I did.

I heard footsteps moving up the stairs, and I recognized them as Cal's. I quickly put Mia's things back and ran into my own room, locking the door behind me.

•••

After changing into a more "suitable" dress, rather than the simple one I had arrived in, I sat in front of my vanity, watching an old music box play as I thought over how much had changed in the past few days. Just last week I was sitting in Chippewa Falls with Mia, the happiest I'd been in years, thinking I'd escaped Cal for good, but now I was right back where I started. Stuck in Cal's grasp, possibly forever, with no one to save me. The only difference was the growing infant in my stomach, giving me a mere two weeks, if that, to figure out how to handle things. Not to mention… Cal always had abusive tendencies, should they continue, I could only pray the baby wouldn't suffer from them.

A knock at my bedroom door pulled me from my thoughts. Not moving my gaze from the gently spinning music box, I called, "Who is it?"

WIthout a response, the door opened and Cal walked in. I had to hold back a sigh, I'd been hoping to hold off a confrontation with him for as long as I could, but it seemed my time was up. He walked over and stood behind me, arms crossed. "We need to talk."

"What more is there to discuss?" It was already established that we both despised each other, but would be spending the rest of our days together while Mia lived free with Jack. I didn't see what more Cal needed to make clear to me, I understood all of his expectations.

Cal sighed and shut the music box, moving to lean against the wall next to the vanity. "I thought that much was obvious. The public doesn't know what's happened with you and Amelia. I can't have all of us telling one story then you go and say something completely different, confusing everyone and blowing the story."

I nodded. "Alright."

"Well, it's quite simple. You were taking Mia to study in Europe, and some complications in the process delayed your return."

It took a good deal of effort not to laugh at the thought. Mia going to study in Europe at five. It sounded ridiculous. I wouldn't believe it for a moment, but I knew it would work on the rest of this society, who would accept just about any lie they were fed if it led to gossip.

Still, I nodded. Anything that kept Mia safe, I would be fine with. After all, I was lucky enough that Cal was letting her stay and coming up with something to cover for her disappearance. Lost in my thoughts, I absent-mindedly picked up the small, almost unnoticeable, necklace from Jack hanging around my neck, toying with it between my fingers.

Cal's voice interrupts my thoughts, "What's this?" He asked, staring at the necklace between my fingers. I froze and he scoffed. "Just a… garbage piece of silver." He took it in his hand and turned it over, reading who it was from. "Oh, it's from Dawson. How sweet." His fist wrapped around it as he pulled it off my neck, making a small gasp escape my lips, and threw it across the room. Tears filled my eyes as my hand gripped the back of my neck and I saw the necklace, broken on the ground across the room.

I stood up, wanting to run and pick up my last piece of Jack before anything more happened to it, but stopped myself before I could go any further. I didn't need to give Cal any more reason to harm me. His cold laugh told me it was too late for that. "You want to go get the necklace? Go on, go and get it."

I didn't move. I was sure I'd regret it if I did. I held Cal's eye contact, not moving an inch. He wouldn't give up that easily though. "You heard me, sweetpea. I said go and get it." Still holding his eye contact, I took a step, my heart pounding. I looked over to the necklace, taking my eyes from Cal for only a moment, but it was a moment too long. My eyes fell on the necklace just as a stinging sensation took over my face, the force of the blow almost knocking me to my knees. Only a step from the vanity, I was able to put my hand on it to steady myself. Afraid to look back at him, I whispered, "Cal, please. Don't do thi-" Before I could finish, I felt his knee slam into my back as he caught his finger in my hair, yanking my head back to bring his mouth to my ear.

"Don't do this?! Do you have any idea what grief you've brought to me, Rose? You run off with a gutter rat on a ship, fake your death, give me a damned daughter, and you can't give me the one thing I ask! Now, you nearly ruin my reputation to run off with the same filthy gutter rat! Anything I might do to you is what you deserve."

Tears threatened to spill from my eyes. The pressure of his knee and the burning in my scalp grew with each passing second. Years ago, these words would have been daggers in my heart, but they hardly hurt now. The man who loved me, whose opinion I valued, was gone, I hardly knew this other man who had replaced him. I closed my eyes, trying to think of what I could say to make him leave me, but nothing came to mind before I felt him lift off my back and he shove me away, knocking me off the vanity to my side on the floor. I look up at him, unwilling to move an inch.

For a moment, Cal didn't make any move either. He looked down at me with disgust, as though deciding what to do with a piece of vermin. I took advantage of his hesitation to speak. "Cal, listen. I...I'm sorry for the way things went, I am. It's almost become hard to remember the Cal I used to know when I married you, the Cal I loved and wanted to please more than anything. I know things have changed, but I beg you, please, to remember who you were. Remember that caring man I married and I beg you...have compassion"

Cal looked at me with piercing eyes and, for a moment, I thought I might have gotten through to him, but that moment ended when his look of thought changed to what was almost a snarl. "Your guilt tripping won't work with me, Rose. I've played enough of your games in the past. You're lucky I've even agreed to let Amelia stay with that bastard in Chippewa Falls."

Hearing such a foul name used for Jack made me want to lose a semblance of restraint and lunge at Cal, but I knew it would be hopeless. Still, I must have visibly clenched my jaw, because Cal looks amused by my reaction. He kneels beside me. "Is there something wrong, sweetpea? Do you not like your bastard lover being called what he is?"

My mouth moves before I can think it through, saying what I know I'll regret. "He's not a bastard, or even a gutter rat! He's more of a gentleman than you'll ever be."

This time it was Cal's foot colluding with my back in a swift kick as he stood, "You little slut. That Dawson brat could never be a gentleman and we both know it." He reached down and took my forearm, far too tightly, in my hand, yanking me up and making me scramble to find my footing. "I thought you'd learned to watch your mouth after all these years, sweetpea," He was right, it was stupid of me to say anything at all and now I knew I would pay for it. "but it seems you haven't and lessons must be taught, isn't that right?"

His fingers released my arm and I fell back to the floor with a gasp. His foot came again, right towards my stomach, and I scrambled to flip over, taking the blow to my back instead, as my arms instinctively wrapped around my abdomen. I braced myself for another blow, but it didn't come. Instead, Cal's voice reached me with a simple command. "Get up." I hesitated, confused, but when he said it again, angrier and more forcefully, I did as he said.

My legs were shaky as I went to stand, I could only pray they wouldn't give out beneath me. Carefully, my jaw trembling with both fear and pain, I straightened up. I could already feel the bruises forming around my lower back and where his hand had grasped my arm, but I did my best to ignore the pain. Tentatively, I met Cal's gaze. His eyes were cold and showed no sign of any emotion except anger and disgust. "Make yourself presentable and be downstairs in five minutes. Don't be late." He turned to leave and I closed my eyes, letting out a sigh of relief, but a moment too soon. The palm of his hand struck my cheek with more force than I'd ever felt behind a blow to me. Unprepared, the blow knocked me off my feet and I fell to my hands, doing nothing more than praying that I'd been given enough for Cal to be satisfied. "And next time… think twice before doing something so rash. I won't tolerate another one of your outbursts."

I don't move until I hear the door shut behind him, letting my arms give way as I collapse in a heap on the floor, letting my tears run freely and sobs rack my body for just a moment.

•••

It was late afternoon, and I was grateful that the sun had begun to set on this horrible day. Whole body ached as the bruises began to develop around my arms, my face, and my back. Nothing happened to my stomach, and that fact was the only thing keeping me together.

I sat at the writing table in my room, trying to repair the necklace Jack gave me. Cal had taken one look at it and broken it into pieces. Those minutes were on a loop in my mind.

"What's this?" Cal asked, pointing to the necklace on my chest. "Just a… garbage piece of silver." He took it in his hand and turned it over, reading who it was from. "Oh, it's from Dawson. How sweet." His fist wrapped around it as he pulled it off my neck and threw it across the room. Tears filled my eyes as my hand gripped the back of my neck and I saw the necklace, broken on the ground across the room.

That necklace was the single most important object I had. It was one of the only things I still had that connected me to Jack, the other being his child. I couldn't lose this necklace. I needed to fix this somehow. I needed to fix this entire situation.

I checked the time: it was only four thirty, which meant I had plenty of time to leave and make it back by dinner. I knew Cal was working in his office, which was in a completely separate section of the house, and that he'd never find out I was gone, as long as I made it back by seven o'clock. I put the necklace in my purse and headed for the door.

As I walked, I was met with a few stares, though that wasn't unusual. From the youngest age, people were watching me. I was the young girl whose father had died, the girl marrying Caledon Hockley, the young woman walking around with her toddler aged daughter, and now, the woman who had taken her daughter to "study in Europe" at only five years old.

I didn't mind the stares, to be honest. From early on, I was the high society girl who didn't do things the way others did. I fought my fiance to sign a contract, I took care of my daughter on my own sometimes, and I sent my daughter away. That was fine with me, and I hoped that at the very least, it encouraged others to do what I did.

I finally arrived at my destination and walked right through the gates and up to the front door. I knocked only once, feeling pain in my wrist as I did so. The door opened only a moment later, and it was one of the housekeepers. "May I help you?"

"Yes," I swallowed hard. "My name is Rose Hockley." My heart sank as I said that name. I desperately wished it wasn't my name anymore, that I was free of the Hockleys and the burdens of being a Hockley. "I'm here to see Samantha Ryder."

The housekeeper gave a quick nod and walked through a hallway, while another one took my coat. I smiled politely, standing awkwardly in the foyer, waiting for the first housekeeper to return, and she finally did. "Ms. Ryder will see you now."

I forced a smile and followed her into the library, where Samantha was sitting on the couch with a book. She looked up at me and knit her eyebrows. "Rose… this is a surprise. I thought it was a mistake when I heard you were at the door."

I sat down gently, afraid to upset my wounds. I had the necklace in my hand, squeezing it as tight as I could. "I need to talk to you." I said, my breathing growing heavier with each breath.

Samantha knit her eyebrows. "Okay," she placed her book on the side table and leaned forward. I knew she would never tell anyone what I told her. After all, she already knew everything else, from falling in love with Jack on Titanic to Cal's abuse.

Over the next half hour, I told Samantha everything that happened, from Cal abusing Mia, to finding Jack again. There was only one thing left to tell her. "And… I found out I'm pregnant... With Jack's child." I felt nervous, as this was my first time telling anyone other than Jack or Mia. "Cal found me and dragged me back here, but I convinced him to let Mia stay with Jack, thank God." I paused, wiping a tear from my eye. "I just don't know what to do now. I mean, I'm stuck here, and I've got six months to figure out what to do with this baby-"

"Not to mention, you've got about… three to four weeks before it's obvious you're pregnant." She looked down. "I mean, it already looks like you ate a large lunch. It'll be hard to hide soon."

I nodded. "What do I do?" I asked. "I-I don't know what to do."

Samantha sighed. "Alright, here's what we'll do," she smiled, an idea forming in her head. "First of all, you can send and receive letters using my address whenever you'd like. You'll write Jack a letter, I'll send it out for you, and I'll give you any letters he sends back." I smiled and nodded. "In the meantime, you need to find a way to convince Cal to let you go."

"But how?" I asked. "I've tried everything already, and I don't know what else to do."

"I don't know, Rose," she shrugged. "You've been married to the man for eight years. There must be something you can do, some way to convince him that a divorce is what he-" she stopped suddenly, staring at my hand. "What are you holding?"

"Oh," I loosened my fist and opened my hand to reveal the necklace. "It's a necklace Jack gave me. Cal, he… broke it." I looked up at her and knew she knew what had happened.

She smiled sadly. "Oh," she paused, looking down at the necklace. "Well, hand it over. I'll get it fixed for you." I hesitated, refusing to give over my one connection to Jack, even to someone I trusted. "Rose, you'll get it back, I promise." I nodded, finally dropping it in her hand, tears blurring my vision as I did so. I'd get him back one day, I had to believe that.

•••

I sat quietly at dinner, with no strength to talk to anyone, even as they spoke about me. Cal, Nathan, and Mother were discussing what we would tell people about where Mia was and where I had gone. I already knew the whole fake story, so I wasn't bothering to listen. Something did catch my attention: I felt eyes on me, and when I looked up, Elizabeth was staring at me. Usually when she stared, it felt angry: she stared at Mia and I while we played in the garden, she watched as Cal scolded me, and she watched how my mother treated me. Now, it seemed sympathetic.

I looked back down at my plate and picked at my food, my mind stuck on Jack. I wrote him a letter at Samantha's house and gave it to her to send, and I wondered how long it would take. It could take about a week, I realized, and by the time he sent a letter back, it would be two. By then, someone could figure out about the pregnancy. I started to panic, and I knew if I didn't leave the dinner table, I'd collapse and drown in a pool of tears.

"E-Excuse me," my voice cracked as I spoke. I placed my napkin on my chair and walked out of the room before anyone could say anything to stop me. I walked upstairs, following the path Mia and I usually took to her bedroom when I walked her back to bed.

Instead of going into my room, I went all the way down the hall to the glass doors that opened up to the terrace. It was freezing, but I didn't care. I walked straight ahead, to the railing. I placed my hands on the railing, realizing that there was no way out of this life. I swung one leg over the rail, then the other, and stood on the other side of the rail, looking down at the garden. Without giving it a second thought, I let go.