Chapter 147

"What is it with you guys and your boner for the beats?" Paris said disdainfully.

"You cannot possibly…"

"Like a group of self-indulgent hippies who want to claim their drug-addled musings as truly inspired artwork generated by the muse? No, I cannot possibly." Paris cut Chris off, who looked torn between fury and deep amusement. He opened the door to let them back into Truncheon.

"Paris!"

"Rory! How are you here already?"

"I was able to work from home this afternoon," Rory answered dismissively, "So I just came right back. What are you doing here?"

"I just needed to get away and think for a few days," Paris said evasively. Rory sighed deeply. Jess looked at Chris.

"Um…we have a bunch of Truncheon stuff to do. Rory, if your schedule can spare it, why don't you and Paris go get a coffee, and bring some back for us?"

"God, you're terrible at excuses. I literally saw the coffee machine in your office," Paris said, rolling her eyes. Chris smirked.

"Yeah, well, we're lazy."

"That I believe, especially with the Beats mania."

"Alright, Paris, let's go, if you're up for it."

"Sure," Paris shrugged. Rory gave Jess a kiss goodbye and they headed back out.

"Wow, she was…"

"Always has been."

"So it's not a pregnancy thing."

"Nope, that's just a Paris thing."

"Ever…?"

"God, no."

"She married?"

"Why, you interested?"

"No, just fascinated," Chris replied, grinning. Jess laughed.

"Yeah, I was too," he admitted, "She is. Her husband's also in journalism. As she mentioned, she's a surgeon."

"That man is either very lucky or very cursed."

"Just like Rory as her best friend- probably both."

"Can you even have coffee, with the, you know…" Rory gestured at Paris' stomach. Paris rolled her eyes.

"Seriously, Gilmore? Haven't you even heard of Emily Oster? I mean, she went to Brown, but setting that aside, she's really rather brilliant."

"Was that an answer?"

"Of course I can have coffee," Paris said, then smirked. "Maybe the one part of research I thought you'd be interested in."

"Well, not anytime soon, anyway," Rory said dismissively.

"But…"

"Paris."

They quickly ordered their coffees and sat down.

"What happened?" Rory said, more softly. Paris sighed, and looked down. She wouldn't meet Rory's eyes as she continued to speak.

"Doyle and I had a fight. We're not speaking. I thought about going to a hotel, but…I don't want to be alone. Especially right now."

"Isn't the whole benefit of the carrying around a child like a kangaroo that you never really are?"

"First, your lack of pregnancy awareness is disturbing, as was your metaphor. Second…seriously, Rory. I can go."

"No, don't," Rory said, reassuring her, "I'm only teasing. I want you to stay. I just want to understand what's going on so I can be here for you."

"Doyle lost his job."

"What?! At the Wall Street Journal?"

"Yep. He was downsized. He pointed out that he wasn't fired for cause or anything, like that was supposed to make it better."

"Paris…you know it's not his fault."

"I don't care if it's his fault! First of all, I'm not sure I believe it really isn't his fault. He doesn't care that much about his work, he doesn't put the effort in, and as much as we want to pretend downsizing is a neutral thing, you only get downsized if you're expendable. He didn't make himself invaluable there. He never cared enough to do that."

"…keep going."

"Plus, whether or not it was his fault, we are having a baby! Soon! He just comes in and tells me this so casually, like it's nothing, and like it's not completely screwing up our plans, plans that we've already started on, that we can't take back anymore…"

"Paris."

"No! I'm scared, Rory. It's not the money, I make enough money, but now I have to make enough money, and work is…look. It's just a bad position to be in, and I panicked. I completely panicked."

"Panicked how?"

"I yelled at him and left."

"Oh, Paris."

"He tried yelling back, but I literally couldn't understand what he was saying. My ears were ringing."

"So you haven't really talked."

"No. But what's there to say? Now we're on a single income, in an incredibly expensive city, where my husband's job prospects aren't exactly stellar, and as it turns out, the baby might need more room than a closet, so I was starting to get the impression we'd need to find a bigger space anyway, but how on earth is that going to make any sense now, and I just…it's too much, Rory!"

"Paris. Breathe. It's going to be okay."

"Is it? How do you know? Can you guarantee it? I can't, and I have to, because I am having a baby, Rory!"

"I figured," Rory smirked, gesturing to Paris' stomach. "Sit, breathe. Want another coffee?"

"…couldn't hurt."

Rory got up and walked over to the coffee line, trying to calm her own thoughts. She hadn't seen Paris this anxious in a long time, and it seemed like even though Paris, as usual, didn't stop talking, she wasn't telling her everything going on in her head. That tended to make it harder to help with things.

If Rory knew one thing, it was that she knew Paris. She had known Paris for years, she'd originally thought since high school, and maybe that was true, insofar as Paris knew Paris in high school. But that was part of the thing itself. Rory had grown to know Paris as Paris had grown to know Paris. Ascher Fleming, for example. Rory had never anticipated that being who Paris was, and neither had Paris. And they both learned from that. They both learned from Paris' relationship with Doyle. Rory might have learned a little more about Paris than she'd wanted to there, in the beginning. But she also learned about Paris as her relationship with Doyle had evolved. Paris had grown with Doyle, from Doyle, and through Doyle.

Occasionally, Rory had wondered if Paris was going to outgrow Doyle. There was such a difference in their maturity, their sense of selves, their approach to career, life, all of the above. But her last visit to Boston had sort of shuttered that thought. Marriage and baby…Paris must be happy, committed and certain. At least within Rory's purview. But things were a little bit different now. Rory had no idea what to make of the situation in front of her. It really didn't seem like Paris regretted her pregnancy- she seemed like the baby was honestly the thing she was most invested in and cared about the most. Her frustration with Doyle, however, was teetering near absurd, and was a little inhumane, considering the position he was in. Rory knew that if something like that happened to Jess, she'd want to be supportive and be there, and she would never love him any less for it.

Considering the other side, Rory noted how absurd Doyle's way of delivering the news had been. She would have been deeply perplexed by that choice too. Beyond that, she was dismayed that this was happening to Doyle, who admittedly, didn't work that hard. He liked his job, she knew, but for him she'd always felt like he saw the pinnacle of his success as his time with the Yale Daily News. Now, he was just coasting along, perfectly happy with journalistic mediocrity. Sure, the Wall Street Journal could hardly be called mediocre. But Doyle certainly could. Rory had kept those feelings to herself since college. She wanted Paris to be happy, and supported her, and that's all there was to it.

But, that said…Doyle had never been Rory's cup of tea, and she had more trouble mustering enthusiasm about how great Doyle was than for criticizing Paris for being unsupportive. In reality, a lot of Paris' worries seemed to be focused on the same things. Rory noted that Doyle's deficiencies weren't a new issue- Paris had acknowledged before his lack of ambition, so on, so forth, etc., etc. But it had been something she'd always been very matter of fact about, like she'd decided she'd accepted those things and made her peace with them. The calculus seemed to have changed when she got pregnant. And, to be fair, Rory thought that maybe Doyle would change too. And maybe he still could. But Rory could absolutely get why Paris had panicked and been so anxious and angry, and why she was here at Rory and Jess'. Rory just had to figure out how she could best support Paris here. Paris was always doing that for Rory, and that's what they were to each other. But ideally, best supporting Paris wouldn't mean her indefinitely staying in their apartment. So Rory felt very motivated to figure out how she could best help Paris, and fast. She sighed, taking another sip of her coffee and starting to ponder her options.