When King Aerys announced a weeklong feast to welcome the creatures from the Place of Miracles, Lord Jon Arryn immediately set out for King's Landing, along with his wards, Eddard Stark and Robert Baratheon. Jon had been quiet throughout the entire journey, as he pondered the implications of dragons returning to the world. Ned and Robert, on the other hand, were filled with excitement, as young men could only be.

When they had finally reached the capital, they were greeted by a clean shaved Aerys Targaryen on a large, scarred and talking dragon. He welcomed his lords by flying across King's Landing, as though to prove his power. When he finished, he summoned his guests to meet with the dragons, who could barely speak Westerosi, but still tried their best to be courteous to the awed nobles.

Ned and Robert were awed by the creatures as was Lord Arryn, but their time with the Dragons was brief, having been forced by time and court niceties to turn to other matters. Still, the creatures proved amazing, and it was not just the dragons. There were Walking, Talking Trees too, Skin Changing giants, and also a giant eagle who glared at all the visitors. There was also supposedly two wizards, but Ned and Robert did not meet them.

It was during those meet and greets that Robert Baratheon saw the most beautiful thing he had ever seen. Well, two things actually…. on the Skin Changer's lady chieftain's chest. The giantess was a comely creature. She had a firm, lanky body and combined it with well-filled "badonkas" (Robert's drunken words). Though not a maiden, she had the look of someone who was in her prime. If she were a normal woman, she would have had normal sized breasts. But given that she was a giant, her breasts were "enough to kill a man if she were to squeeze them on him." Robert was in love. Not in love love, for Robert's one true love was his betrothed, Lyanna Stark. Of course.

This was a different kind love, and perhaps only slightly less special.

Robert tried his best to make a good impression on the giantess at court, but her inability to speak Westerosi and the vast throng of nobles, including many young men, who were transfixed at the same things he was, prevented him.

Days passed and soon the festivities were over. Thankfully, Jon wished to remain in the capital for a while. "I have certain affairs I need to deal with, lads. So I must leave you boys on your own for awhile," Jon said. "If you need guards, talk to Vardis. And lads, I expect you to behave yourselves. That means you, Robert."

So they were free, and like many free boys, Robert was determined to seek out his Queen of Love and Beauty (for that's what he called her breasts). At first, they went to the Red Keep, but most of the creatures had already departed to places granted to them by the crown, where they might rest away from the eyes of men. Only mighty Narsologalagon and some of the larger dragons had remained near the Red Keep, and the King had made it clear that "they were his."

But Robert would not be deterred, and soon, he learned that the Skin-Changers were given an abandoned village about two hours ride from King's Landing. Outsiders were not allowed. But Robert Baratheon had learned a long time ago that there was a big difference between what is 'not allowed' and what is 'Not Allowed.' All one needs is gold, drink and a little charm.

"Please Robert!" Ned had pleaded when he bought a dozen large kegs of wine, along with men and mules to carry them. "This is folly! Even if we could find her, how will you speak to her. She could barely speak the Common Tongue."

But Robert would not be dissuaded. "Remember the Tyroshi girl, Ned? Remember her? She couldn't speak a word of Westerosi, but I still bedded her. By the Gods she had a big pair on her, but nowhere as big as my Queen of Love and Beauty"

Eddard had threatened and begged, warned Robert that he would tell Jon or even Lyanna, but Robert also reminded him of favors Eddard owed to him, favors that the latter vaguely remember. So, ultimately, he followed the young Lord of Storms End. Later, when all this is done, Ned would pray to the Weirwoods and demand the Old Gods explain how Robert Baratheon had managed to get him to go along with his mad plan. For it was madness, and yet he somehow went along with them.

Robert had paid the guards watching the Skin-Changers with gold and a keg. The guards hesitated but with a smile and a grin from the Storm Lord, they became fast friends. Their own sergeant brought them to the Skin-Changers, who regarded them with suspicion. Most of the Skin-Changers were in their human forms, but a couple of giant bears were carrying fallen trees from the wood, and putting them on a stock pile to use build wooden cottages.

Ned counted them, and he estimated there were slightly less than two dozen of them, maybe less. Many were men, but there were a few young children who peered at them from behind trees and abandoned houses. They reminded Ned of Wildlings for some reason... Wildlings who were about the size of Gregor Clegane.

As soon as they crossed the village's borders, two of the giants walked up to them. One of them said something unintelligible, and pointed at the dirt road, an obvious gesture for the intruders to go back the way they came. "Go. Leave," one of them said in accented Westerosi. Ned looked to the guards, and they seemed be ready to comply.

Robert, however... Robert gave both giants a wide smile. "Here now! We just met!" And he immediately walked to one of the Kegs and began opening it. "Don't you want to-"

One of the Giants changed himself into giant bear. Eddard reached for his sword, while the guards and the men guiding the keg-bearing mules fled. The mules, too, began screaming in terror. Robert, however, smiled, as though the creature had shown off a magic trick. He poured himself two cups, one for himself, and approached the bear. "Can you also change into a stag?"

The giant bear roared at him, the kind of roar that could terrify a lesser man. But Robert Baratheon was no lesser man, and he handed one of the cups to the Skin-Changer who remained human. "Drink," he ordered and drank his goblet in one gulp.

"Robert!" Ned hissed. "This is folly."

But Robert would not heed him. Indeed, his smile grew wider.

"Aerys King say not disturb. Go please." The Skin Changer who remained human said almost pleadingly.

"What. I don't understand," Robert lied.

The skin changer repeated what they said, more forcefully this time, as though raising his voice would allow the Westerosi nobles to understand them. When Robert continued to pretend ignorance, they groaned in frustration.

"Name. You understand name? What name?" Robert asked. When they hesitated, Robert introduced himself. "Mine is Robert of House Baratheon, and that over there is Eddard of House Stark. We mean no intrusion on you and yours." And Robert winked at a young boy peeking a little closer than the other Skin Changers. "We just want to give you gifts, yeah? Gifts? You understand?"

"Gift. What gif-"

"Yes, we only want to give you gifts, and be friends. Ain't that right Ned?" Despite himself, Ned was nodding his head. "We had tried to meet you in King's Landing, but we never got the chance. So here we are!" And he turned to the Skin Changer, who were staring at him in bewilderment, as though he was mad. "Now, who wants some Dornish Reds?" Robert then walked to one of the kegs, slapped it and began filling several wooden goblets.

The giant bear changed back into his human form, and he looked at his kinsman in frustration. They looked back to the others, begging for counsel, but they too looked puzzled. They began arguing, pointing at Robert whose grin never faltered. Eventually, through broken conversation, the Skin-Changers settled on a plan: "We drink this, promise leave?" One of the Skin-Changers said

Robert began nodding his head. "Aye. I promise." And then in a lower voice. "Eventually." When the Skin-Changers had drained their goblets, Robert asked, "What's your name friend? Name?"

"What name? Ah name! Anborn." The friendlier of the Skin-Changers said. He was dark haired fellow with rough features.

"Calmacil," the one who transformed into a bear said, and he showed that their goblets were empty. "Finish! Go please." He was fair haired and comely, almost like a Westerman.

Some of the other Skin-Changers had slowly closed in, curious at the wines.

"Aye! That you did! But what about the rest of your kind, eh?" Robert said, and leaned over and indicated the rest of the Skin-Changers.

"Robert," Eddard hissed in his ear, fearful at what will happen next. "Whatever you're thinking..."

But Robert waved him away, as more Skin Changers began approaching.


Ingethil fled. She fled through ash-covered lands, through blasted dread forests and past corpse strewn places. Alongside her were the kin of her dead husband, Amlin of the Beornings and brother to their high chieftain Grimbeorn. She wiped a tear away at the old wound, even as she demanded her kind to hasten. Above flew dragons, and ahead, struggling to maintain their pace, were the Ent-Wives. Guarding the rear were the Blue Wizards, who with spells, tried to beat back the shadows that pursued them. They were to go to a secret place, a place, one rumored to have had its origins in the First Age.

The Wizards said they had heard of this place only from rumors and half-forgotten legends. It was not a reassuring thought, but they had nothing else. If this legend were to be a lie, they all would perish.

But it had not been a lie, and they came to a place that bore the marks of the Eldar, and of things stranger still. There, they found a Mallorn Tree and next to it, a strange white tree with red leaves. When the Wizards saw the trees, they uttered spells, terrible and ominous, and the trees were filled with a blinding power and then...

And then…

And then Ingethil woke from her sleep, to hear the sound singing and drunken revelry. Leaving her humble cabin, she found some of the younger skin-changers singing and drinking with two young Westerosi nobles. Some of the skin changers had shifted into their animals forms, such that among the revelers, there were dancing bears, dancing wolves and even a dancing bat.

One was a small, frowning boy in his late teens. He wore a direwolf sigil on his coat, and he was trying to control his rambunctious companion (with little success).

The other was a larger young man, but no older than the other. He wore a golden stag on his doublet, and he was tall, almost as tall as one of the Beorning youths he was singing with. Upon seeing the man, Ingethil barked at the young men for allowing the outsider into their little settlement. She looked around to find anyone who could explain to her who had caused this commotion, and he found in the tipsy form of Anborn leaning against a tree.

"What is the meaning of this?" she cried, as she stormed towards the young Skin Changer.

"Myyy lady," Anborn greeted. He was stinking with wine. "They meant us no harm. Theysh jusht wantsh to makes friends, see?" Anborn then fell on his knees and vomited arbor red on the ground. The young men roared with laughter (except for Ned of course, who looked like he wasn't sure how he got here).

The crowd then began singing "The Bear and the Maiden Fair" in broken Westerosi. It was made more ridiculous by the fact that Giant Bears were singing it.

"A bear there was, a bear, a bear!

All black and brown, and covered with hair.
The bear! The bear..."

Calmacil soon came, and tried to help Anborn. "Lady," he stammered. "Westerosi nobles came. Brought wine." Calmacil said with a hiccup. "Strong wine"

"I called for a knight, but you're a bear!

A bear, a bear!
All black and brown and covered with hair"

"I can see that!" Ingethil snapped. "Why didn't you tell him to leave."

"I did, my lady, but He does not seem to understand."

"She kicked and wailed, the maid so fair,
But he licked the honey from her hair.
Her hair! Her hair!

He licked the honey from her hair!"

"You could have carried them out."

It was Anborn who answered. "You mean forch 'em out. Alatar and Pallando will have... uh... will have a... will be angryyyy." Ingethil had a few more words for him. but he fell down again, a stupid smile on his face. Calmacil, meanwhile, gave up trying to help him, and lay himself next to Anborn, and closed his eyes. "Tired m'lady. Shhleep now," he croaked.

Ingethil rolled her eyes and turned her stern gaze at the party. A little over a dozen large kegs were empty, but there were still more. Now Skin-Changers may look strong and stern, but unlike men and dwarves, they rarely drink, having little knowledge of how to make or enrich them. Still, their kind are not unfamiliar to the taste of ale and wine, and most Skin Changers, particularly Beornings, are not opposed to a little sip whenever it was offered... and Robert Baratheon was offering them a lot.

She left the two there and began walking in the direction of the party. "You! Who you!" Ingethil snarled in broken Westerosi, as she came near them.

Immediately, the Skin-Changers returned to their human forms, and began stammering excuses, but Ingethil's wrath was focused on Robert Baratheon alone,

"You! Who you?" She repeated.

Robert smile was bright. Here was his Queen of Love and Beauty! He bowed like a courtier, and reached out to kiss her hand. When he raised his head, he found a frowning Ingethil, eyes distrustful. So with hand signals and broken words, he offered friendship and wine.

Ingethil narrowed her eyes, even more suspicious now. What do you really want, she thought, studying Robert's smiling, wine-reddened face. I have seen much of your kind in King's Landing, nobles who pretend generosity even as they harbored their ambitions. She deemed that Robert was no exception. He looked into his eyes, and saw only subterfuge there. Here was a young Westerosi noble who eagerly wants something from me... Whatever that thing may be, Ingethil had no desire to give it.

She turned her attention to Ned, an otherwise quiet looking young man, who looked ill at ease at the drunk Skin-changers next to him. When their eyes met, she saw the eyes of someone who desperately wanted to apologize. At length, Ingethil decided that the two young men were untrustworthy, and should be expelled as quickly as possible.

"Go now."

"Oh but we haven't had the chance to-"

"Go now!"

"Just one, lady! One. Yes?" Robert said handing out a goblet full of strong wine.

"Go now!"

"No understand," Robert lied. "You Like Arbor Red?"

The young Storm Lord had expected more words, and was surprised by what happened next. For Ingethil had lost her temper, and she changed into a giant bat. She began to flap her wings, and as she hovered above the ground, her feet tried to grab Robert.

Robert, however, was too quick and he quickly rolled away. For a moment, Ned and the rest of the Skin Changers were speechless, before Eddard Stark came to his friend's side, sword drawn. Some of the Skin-Changers also began pleading with their lady to change back to human form, arguing that Lord Robert meant them no harm, while others remained still, as though not knowing what to do.

"Put away your sword, Stark!" Robert snarled at Eddard.

"Robert, this is not the time-"

"Put away your sword, damn it! And step away."

Ingethil had landed and transformed back into her human form, and was growling at Robert. One of the Skin-Changers tried speaking to her but she snapped at him to stay back before returning her angry gaze back at Robert. "Go. now!"

"I'll go, my lady," he answered, not caring that the Skin Changer did not understand Westerosi. Robert was grinning, as inspiration took hold of him. "I'll go, but only if you can beat me!" And Robert took off his robe and doublet and stood before her like a wrestler, his supple muscles glowing with strength. "Fight me! And I leave."

The Skin Changers immediately understood what he wanted, and many of them smiled a predatory smile. They look at Ingethil who stood there as though she had just been slapped by this impudent cretin. "So be it," she snapped, and transformed herself into a giant bear, larger than any of the other Skin-Changers. Ned was horrified but Robert, somewhat drunk, only smiled.

"You fool!" Ned cried at him. "You damned fool!" But his cries were drowned out by the discord of the crowd, who eagerly watched the two combatants. At first, Ingethil did not swipe at Robert with her claws, but rather tried to tackle him. Any other man would have been easily subdued, but fleet footed Robert Baratheon evaded the giant she-bear's attacks, and for a few moments, it almost looked like he had a chance.

But then the bear began swiping at him. These attacks did not have the strength and speed to kill a man, but they were enough to injure him. Robert managed to evade most of them, but one caught him off guard and it left him on rolling on the dirt.

Ned screamed at him to stop, and Ingethil, the giant she-bear, stood still, as though to wait for him to tender his surrender. But Robert smiled, even as a shallow cut appeared on his right arm. To everyone's astonishment, rather than retreat, Robert charged the giant bear. The daring move had taken Ingethil off guard, and in an eyeblink, Robert was on the bear's back.

For what seemed like an hour, the two wrestled - man against giant bear. Robert laughed all throughout the entire battle, as though the whole thing a was game, but the she-bear roared and seemed in battle fury, as though astounded that the pampered noble was able to dodge her attacks.

Even so, despite Robert's efforts, the outcome of the battle was a foregone conclusion. Despite the young stormlord's agility, the giant bear was too strong an opponent to fight alone, and soon Robert was pinned to the ground by a claw almost as big as his chest. The battle lasted less than a couple of minutes, though it seemed longer.

"A valiant effort," Ingethil said. "But this game is over."

Robert was smiling up at her as she transformed back into her human form. "No understand," he said with a grin, unmindful of the small cut on his head.

Ingethil was going to say something, but it was drowned out by cheering from the Skin Changers, who applauded Robert's valor and his temerity. They began drinking again, and began filling up goblets for Robert and their Lady Ingethil.

"No!" Ingethil's voice halted the premature celebrations, and she unleashed a torrent of commands and curses that made the young Skin Changers put down their goblets and cups. She then turned her gaze at the intruders. "You!" She pointed at Robert then at Ned, who looked exhausted. "You. Go. No more... wine? Yes, wine. No more wine. Go."

To his credit, Robert rose up, smiled and bowed like a courtier. "As my lady commands," he said. "But before I do that..." He extended his hand. Ingethil frowned at the hand, but in the end decided to shake it. Her angry faced calmed, and for a moment, Robert thought he saw respect in her face.

"Thank you, my lady," Robert said.

Ingethil nodded, and she made gestures to signify two figures fighting. He then pointed at Robert. "You good."

Robert bowed to hide the big grin on his face.

Ingethil turned back to make sure that the Skin-Changers had put down their cups. To her surprise, they did. She was going to order then to return the remaining kegs back onto the mules, when Ingethil's eyes grew in shock as she felt hard, meaty fingers squeeze her buttocks. With a gasp, she quickly turned around, and saw next to her, Robert Baratheon smiling a dirty grin.


When Ned and Robert returned to the inn where Jon Arryn and his entourage were staying, Robert had a stinging red slap mark on the right side of his face. Along with that fearsome wound, was a large smile; the kind of smile a man has after a great deed. When Lord Arryn heard of what his wards had done, he rebuked them for an hour, before sending them to Vardis Egen for their punishment.

Egen had them clean all the Arryn delegation's horses.

"I'm sorry your plan failed Robert," Eddard said, as he shoveled away horse manure from one of the stable's stalls. He had been angry at Robert, but at that point, he was just too tired.

"Ah Ned!" Robert had chuckled, winking at his friend. Though he was carrying two buckets of horse shit, he had a pleased look on his face. "That was just the first part of my plan."


Author's Note: I'm operating under the assumption that there are other types of Skin Changers in Middle Earth, and not just the Beornings.