A/N: Without further ado, we'll just let you read. Thanks for your reviews.

Disclaimer: We don't own Chuck and we aren't making money from this.


Sarah blinked.

"E-Excuse me?" she tried.

Ellie just held out a hand. "Let me just save you the trouble of trying to keep up the ruse, Sarah. Chuck sat Devon and I down tonight and told us everything."

She felt herself gaping. Had Chuck simply had enough of the lies and did it anyway, in spite of what they'd all been telling him about how unsafe it would make his family for the last six months?

"Apparently, that...general woman, the NSA woman, um...Beckman, decided it was time." A wry look came over her face. "Over six months later."

Sarah didn't even know what to do with this information, so she just stood there numbly. General Beckman had approved Chuck telling his family about his being involved with the CIA and NSA and nobody had apparently seen fit to inform her about this development? Not even a warning text?

"Look, I know you probably aren't sure what to say. I really sprang this on you. I just thought you would've known about this already, otherwise I wouldn't have come straight here like this. I-I'm sorry. It was the only place I could—I felt like I needed to be here, Sarah. So I just...I left and drove here." Sarah still didn't say anything, completely at a loss, and she watched as Ellie tentatively continued. "I didn't even know...if...you'd be here. And I thought you'd know by now that...I know." Sarah sent her a questioning look. "Everything."

A loud huff came out of Sarah; she didn't know if it was relief or something else. And she moved to her dresser, facing away from Ellie, leaning her palm on the top of it and letting her chin fall to her chest. "By everything, you mean… everything everything?"

"Bryce being a spy? Sending Chuck this Intersect thing? Which...I'm not sure I'm ever really going to understand how it's even possible to do something like that, but I really have no choice but to believe it but only after thinking Chuck was playing an elaborate joke for a good twenty minutes…" Sarah couldn't find it within her to smirk like she normally would. "And this whole...joining the NSA thing."

She knew of a million other things that took precedence, other more important things she needed to ask Ellie, talk to Ellie about … and yet, she still asked this first: "So then you know...about me."

Ellie was silent for long enough that Sarah shifted her weight and glanced over her shoulder at the other woman. "Yes," Ellie said, hurt in her face. "I know. I know you were just on a mission. For the CIA. That this whole thing has been a mission for you. My brother...us...me." She shrugged.

No, not the whole thing, Sarah wanted to say as she turned to face Chuck's sister. The whole thing wasn't a mission. She needed to admit that to herself...again. And maybe she could find it within her to tell this woman the same thing. But instead, all she could say was, "Oh."

She owed Ellie so much more than that, and she shut her eyes in frustration, shaking her head at herself.

"You must...feel…" What? Betrayed? She found herself not wanting to say that word out loud. She'd felt betrayed by Chuck not telling her about his decision to become an NSA agent. She'd felt that betrayal down to her very soul. And yet, Ellie'd just learned her brother had been keeping something this massive from her for over six months. She couldn't even imagine how she felt.

"Like I've been kicked in the gut over and over and over and over? Yeah." Ellie tucked some hair behind her ear.

"I'm sorry," Sarah burst out. "I'm sorry about all of this, Ellie." She took a step closer. "I'm so sorry. But it was for your…" She paused at the flat look Ellie seemed to unconsciously send her way. "Right. I won't...say that. You've probably heard it from Chuck a million times tonight. That he was—that we were trying to keep you safe."

"Yeah." Ellie sighed. "I've heard it. But what I don't think he understands, in spite of my trying to tell him—I dunno, maybe I just didn't use my words right—is that this whole time, yeah, maybe I was safer physically, but I was trapped in this mindset that something really bad was going on in that guy's head, in his heart, and he wasn't comfortable telling me about it. I didn't know if I should push or...if I did, if I'd be pushing him away. Wondering if all the shit from our childhood was finally catching up to him and he was...depressed or...on the verge of snapping and having a nervous breakdown or something. I had no idea. And I guess I was just clinging to the fact that he was with a good woman at least, someone who could help him see his worth. But even that wasn't…"

Ellie didn't have to finish. It wasn't real, she was going to say. Sarah felt stinging at the backs of her eyes. She rubbed her clammy hands down her jeans and shifted her weight uncomfortably. "Well. He found enough worth in himself to...take a pretty big step."

"Is that what we're calling it?" Ellie gave Sarah a wry look, eyebrow raised.

"I don't know what else to call it," Sarah admitted with a shrug.

"Before we get into all of that, can I ask you something?"

Sarah could tell by the look on Ellie's face that whatever she meant to ask would probably cause her to have to dive headfirst into whatever this conversation was going to end up being. But she nodded anyway, because she supposed Ellie deserved to ask questions.

"When I was out there driving around in circles trying to figure out what to do with everything Chuck told me, the thing I kept wondering was how you managed to sit there on all those double dates, those family dinners and holidays, and be okay with looking at my brother like that, touching him, you know? Saying those things to him, and about him, when it was just you and me...and all that time, you never actually...felt that way. How does someone do that? How do you train a human being to be able to do something like that?"

Sarah hung her head in the silence. "It-It's just...what I had to do. For the job. To...keep everyone safe."

"And what about you?" Sarah looked up at Chuck's sister, confusion in her face. "What'd you do to keep yourself safe in the meantime?" She crossed her arms, Sarah still not really getting where she was going with that. "You pretend to love someone long enough, Sarah… Well, I mean, spy or not, you're a human being. You're a real person."

Sarah felt the power of that in her chest, and she found herself leaning heavily against the dresser behind her. You're a human being. You're a real person.

And maybe that was why she liked Ellie as much as she did. Maybe that was why she liked being around her. Casey, Beckman, Graham while he was still alive, and even Chuck… they all knew she was a spy, and they looked at her through that lens. Ellie didn't know she was a spy. She just thought she was a woman who loved Chuck. She saw her without that lens of knowing she was with the CIA. And it had been comforting, hadn't it? Being around someone who simply didn't know her in that way. Who knew her in a...different way. A more real way.

That was over.

And Sarah found it hurt. It hurt almost as bad as the last few weeks had hurt. Or perhaps it just hurt in a different way.

"You mean...how didn't I...end up having...feelings for him. Right?" Sarah asked quietly.

"I couldn't have done that. If I were in your shoes, if it was Devon with the Intersect. Even with training." She huffed then, waving her hand dismissively. "I probably sound so naive to you. I'm sure in your line of work, you have to do whatever you can to...I don't know...complete a mission."

"I didn't do it."

There was that heavy silence again. For a good twenty seconds. And then Ellie muttered a quiet, "What?"

"I didn't get through all of that without...slipping. I mean, losing my footing."

Ellie stared at her hard, and then there was a switch in her features, a smidgeon of warmth or...relief. She didn't know. She couldn't read Ellie as well as she usually could. Maybe because all of this was screwing up her ability to do...anything. She hadn't expected Ellie to show up at her door. And especially not with...this extra knowledge. She rolled her eyes at herself in her mind.

"I didn't think you did. I mean, I had my doubts."

Sarah narrowed her eyes. "I'm sorry?"

"Remember that one night you came to our apartment and Chuck had to stay a bit later at the Buy More to clean up after those Jeff and Lester freaks or whatever so I made you have a glass of wine with me?" Ellie nervously ran her hand down her shirt. Sarah nodded. She remembered. Because Ellie had asked her a pretty pointed question that night. And she'd not known how to answer. "I asked you if you thought Chuck was living up to his fullest potential at the Buy More, if you thought he could be happy doing that for the rest of his life."

Sarah nodded again.

"I kept thinking about that when I was driving around. You wanna know what finally made me turn around and drive all the way here?" Sarah met her eyes. "You very clearly didn't know how to answer. I could see it written on your face, Sarah. You looked so uncomfortable and I felt like such a jerk, putting you on the spot like that. You wanted to stick up for him. I could see that, too. Like you were looking for a way to explain to me that he was just fine the way he was." She shrugged. "I dunno. Maybe I'm completely wrong. Because then you told me that Chuck deserves better than the Buy More. And as I was driving around, I just...I couldn't believe that was anything less than real. What would be the point of pretending there, saying those things? What kind of...cover would you be protecting? Unless that was just you being completely honest with me."

Sarah took a deep breath. This family would be the death of her. She was sure. She blinked a few times, fighting back nervous tears. And then she swallowed and nibbled on the inside of her cheek, before she finally sighed. "I didn't realize I was being so transparent, I guess. And I suppose that's really been the story of my life lately." She let out a mirthless one syllable chuckle, then sobered up.

"Ellie, I kept a lot from you. And I'm sorry. Saying it was a part of my job isn't an excuse; it's an explanation, I guess. But a lot of those moments were real. You Bartowskis have a real way of making a spy feel like...well, more than a spy. It's hard to be less than honest in that situation. As much as I felt...super uncomfortable."

Ellie sniffed in amusement and scratched the back of her neck. "Yeah, I could tell you were uncomfortable. And here I was just thinking you were a private person, not used to people like us."

"I'm definitely not used to people like you, Chuck, Devon...even Morgan. Not even after all these months."

"You mean people who pry?" Ellie asked with a knowing smirk.

"People who care enough to pry," she answered, meeting Ellie's gaze steadily.

She watched as tentative understanding overcame the brunette's features, and then Ellie shook her head. "I can't believe my friend is a spy. That's just crazy to me. Sent here to protect my brother who has a super-computer in his brain. Something that...that puts a target on his back. How did he keep it from me all this time?"

"Fear for your safety," Sarah said, trying to get past the fact that Ellie had just called her "my friend". And she felt the need to add, "It ripped him to shreds not telling you." And it ripped her to shreds watching him. It was way too much of a reveal for her to say that part out loud, though.

"I'm so pissed at him. I get it, and maybe I'm being unfair, but I'm still so pissed. I can't help it. It's just how I feel." Her lower lip quivered a bit, but she kept control.

"I understand that. And I understand how angry you must be at me, too. Lying to you all this time." Ellie just shrugged noncommittally. "When I was supposed to be your friend." She got another shrug, but the other woman wasn't looking at her. "All I can say is that I'm sorry for the part I played in all of that. I was one of the people who persuaded him not to tell you, to keep it all from you."

"I'm sure it's hard enough protecting someone like Chuck Bartowski without adding me and Devon into the mix. He's such a…" She shut her eyes and sighed. "God, I love him, but I can't imagine he made any of this easy on you."

"Of course not," Sarah said immediately, and she was surprised by the sudden chuckle from his sister. She felt herself smile a little. "He has a really pesky altruistic streak that's both fucking infuriating and insanely admirable and endearing all at once." She crossed her arms and pursed her lips, twisting them to the side, feeling incredibly vulnerable suddenly.

"I can see that. And I can see how much worse he's going to be once they do whatever this...training is...with him," Ellie said. Sarah watched the fury come back. "That total idiot. That complete and total idiot. Honestly, out of everything he told me, that was the one thing I could've hit him for. God damn it."

"Tell me about it," Sarah breathed, her filter breaking for just a moment.

"So...you really didn't have any part in that." Ellie was giving her a searching look.

The CIA agent held her hands up and took a step closer. "I had nothing to do with it. To the point where they all...did it behind my back, kept me in the dark. The offer was made without consulting me. He accepted the offer without talking to me about it. Cas—Agent Casey kept it from me, too. Maybe because I'm CIA and…" Well, maybe she shouldn't go through all of that with Chuck's sister. She imagined he would've side-stepped the most dangerous implications of Operation Bartowski—including Graham's potential betrayal, and how they'd all grown to distrust him over the past few months, the director of the CIA, for God's sake. Ellie might freak out...just a little. "And maybe there's some history of...competition between the NSA and the CIA. I don't know." She shrugged. She felt bad, but even if she was insurmountably angry at Chuck right now, she didn't want to get him in too deep of water with his sister. She'd let him handle that all on his own.

"Why did he do this? Why did he lie to you? What a complete ass. I swear to God, he is capable of such unmitigated stupidity." She rubbed her temples and growled in frustration. Then she broadsided her completely. "You're packing to leave. Not on a mission, but for good. Aren't you?"

Sarah gaped again, then turned to look at the suitcase. "I…"

"That's a yes," Ellie said wryly, smiling in spite of the implications.

"No, it—It's a…" She huffed and shrugged. "I was leaning towards it. Heavily. I can't just wait around here for Chuck to…"

"Get himself killed? You don't have to tiptoe, Sarah. I've been driving around for a while. Trust me, I've come up with every possible scenario and an early death is the end of every single one of them. Having to bury my brother before I'm even forty." She looked angry still, but also like she was worried sick.

Sarah's discomfort with all of this was pushed aside by genuine concern then, and she moved to Ellie's side, taking her gently by the arm and walking her to sit on the end of her bed. She sat next to her, tucking her hands back into her lap and twisting them, uncomfortable and nervous again. "I've...gone through those scenarios in my own head. I can't watch it happen."

"Except your scenarios are probably very real, considering you're the one with the spying experience, huh? And if you're so against this, it really underscores for me just how bad of an idea it is." Ellie let out a long breath through pursed lips and blinked rapidly. Sarah kept her hands tucked in her lap still as the other woman managed not to cry. "You should've seen him, sitting there, justifying it to me so sincerely. Does he…?" She turned to Sarah then and gripped her arm tightly. "Does he really know what he's getting into? Does he understand what he's getting himself into?"

Sarah was silent for a few moments. And then… "No. I don't think so."

"Did you tell him that?" Ellie asked, almost sounding desperate as her grip tightened.

"I did." And suddenly, Ellie's involvement was making Chuck's decision even more of a damn mistake, and Sarah's anger multiplied. "He's so fucking thoughtless sometimes." Ellie was silent as Sarah shook her head. "He doesn't think things through. He just jumps in with both feet. And every single time I'm there, or Casey's there, to make sure nothing bad happens to him. He doesn't get that we aren't always going to be there. And now he wants to be a spy?" She grunted and shoved her hand through her hair. "He thinks it's gonna be so easy and he doesn't even know the half of what this job entails. He's so naive about this whole thing and it makes me feel so crazy…"

"So you're leaving."

Sarah could hear a note of confusion, and maybe Ellie was blaming her for it a little, too. She wasn't sure. She tried not to be offended or hurt by it. "It isn't that easy…"

"Oh God, Sarah. No offense. But if one more person says some iteration of 'it isn't that easy' to me today, I'm going to murder somebody." She froze then. "Probably isn't something I should say to a CIA agent, huh?"

In spite of everything, Sarah snorted. "Speaking as...as a CIA agent…" Someone who had killed more people than she'd ever feel comfortable telling anybody, let alone Ellie. "I get it. I can't blame you for it. You've really been through the wringer tonight."

"Please just be honest with me, Sarah. Why are you leaving?"

Sarah understood part of the implication, and she knew Ellie understood it too. She was packing to leave for good, and she most likely had no intention of telling Ellie goodbye first. She wondered if that hurt the other woman. She had to understand that telling her friend she was leaving, the implication of her and Chuck breaking up, facing Ellie's confusion and hurt… God, she couldn't stomach it. Nobody would be able to stomach that. Trained spy or not.

Sarah's shoulders slumped a little and she took a deep breath. She decided to drop the spy front...if only for one last time...and let her head fall into her hands. She felt a tentative hand on her upper back, just draped there, reassuringly. It was more than she deserved, and wasn't that how things always were with the Bartowskis?

Pushing her hands through her hair, she leaned her elbows on her knees and just stared at her dresser across the room, slumped forward, Ellie's hand staying on her back.

"I don't know how to do this, Ellie. I don't think I can. Not anymore. I've reached the breaking point." The hand moved a little, then slipped right back into place again. "From the beginning, all Chuck's talked about is wanting to go back, wanting to be a regular guy again, have a normal life. And I've fought for that, tooth and nail, with every last fiber of my being. I've tried so hard to protect him. Half a year, keeping him safe, trying to keep him from completely melting down, from just...breaking. The way anyone weaker might've by now. He's driven me crazy in so many ways, but it's been so worth it. Really, it has. And then, suddenly, out of nowhere, he decides to do something that'll take him...on a completely opposite path from the one I thought he wanted so badly, the one I fought to get him to all this time. I don't get it," she breathed, shaking her head.

"I can't imagine what it must've been like, having to deal with my brother for six months…" Sarah turned and gave Ellie a slightly amused, questioning look. "I mean, I've dealt with him for twenty-six years, I know. But… That just means I know better than anyone how much trouble he must've given you, and John."

Sarah huffed, shaking her head with a wry smile. "So much trouble. It's been kind of endless." Then she looked at Ellie again. "But I meant it when I said it was worth it. To keep him safe, to make sure he was okay...it's been so worth it."

"He's the only family I've got left, Sarah. I can't tell you how much I appreciate you saying that."

She smiled at Chuck's sister. "I don't get how you don't absolutely hate me right now. First lying to you about who I am, and now...leaving just as the shit hits the fan." She sat up and shook her head.

"I don't know that you really lied to me about who you are. Not really. I might not've known you were CIA, but I feel like...I kinda know you. A little. As much as you let me." She shrugged. "And I'm trying to understand why you're leaving…"

The way she trailed off was a pretty clear hint. She was trying to understand but Sarah really hadn't finished explaining, had she? She sent Ellie a side-eye and smirked a bit, shrugging. "I don't really know that Chuck would've made this choice if it weren't for me. I mean, if they'd sent someone else, some other agent. But it was me, and things happened, lines were blurred, he was...well, him. He wants to be a part of my world, Ellie. That's what this boils down to."

"Ah." Ellie nodded. "He wants to be a part of your world...because it's your world. If it wasn't, he wouldn't have chosen to be a spy. Did I get it?"

"That's the gist. And I can't be here, watching him take this destructive path for me… I didn't know what I was doing all this time, the things he was getting into his head. I didn't know what he was thinking. Now that I do know that… It's best that I go." She huffed. "Honestly, I'm just done with him."

"Are you really?" Ellie asked after a long pause.

"No, of course not," the blonde breathed, just barely managing to keep the bubble in her chest from bursting. "But I need to be. This has been the hardest six months of my life…" And she'd really seen and experienced some shit, hadn't she? "And you probably think I'm a coward and weak for running away from it. But I can't face what's gonna happen to him because...I'm the reason why…"

"This is going to sound strange, Sarah, but...can I just ask…?" Sarah sent a questioning look in her direction and Ellie crossed her arms this time. "In the last six months, have you gotten any kind of breather? Chuck's...a lot," she explained as Sarah's brow furrowed in confusion. "He's the best person I know, that idiot, but God, he is constantly putting other people ahead of himself. To a fault. I can't imagine he takes orders well, even from the government."

"HA!" Sarah burst out, blushing a little at how loud it was.

Ellie giggled good-naturedly. "Yeah, I thought not. I know firsthand that he's a handful, not that he means to be. But he's just always taking care of everyone else and...not himself. He used to do that stuff back when we were teenagers and I had to get him out of so much trouble. There was the time he made himself almost have a mental breakdown in high school because he was helping too many people and couldn't figure out how to say no." She sighed and shook her head wistfully. "And with...this Intersect in his head now, you've had to be around him practically twenty-four seven, I imagine. Making sure nobody gets to him. Making sure he's safe. Have you done anything outside of watching over him and...maybe sleeping?"

Sarah shrugged. "It hasn't been so bad. It isn't exactly a hardship being around him. Which, I guess, has been the trouble this whole time. If he wasn't...him...I could just do the bare minimum of the job and get on with my life."

"Sarah, I can't begrudge you wanting to leave. I...care about you. A lot. You're really one of my only friends outside of the insulated world at the hospital, my coworkers and such. I feel like...we've connected."

"As much as I'm capable of," Sarah muttered, rolling her eyes at herself.

"What I mean is we're friends."

The CIA agent looked at the neurosurgeon and smiled genuinely. "We're friends."

"I don't want to lose a friend. Almost as much as I don't want to lose my brother." She took a deep, calming breath and shook her head. "Will you consider maybe...thinking about staying? Please?"

Sarah looked away and slumped a little again. She couldn't stay. But before she could verbalize that, Ellie continued.

"I know. I know it's so much to ask of you. If you leave, you could be done with all of this. You could go back to whatever your life was before you were sent here. I don't presume to know. Maybe it's a lot simpler out there, even if it's dangerous." Ellie shrugged. "I don't watch nearly as many spy movies as Chuck does, and I've definitely never picked up one of those...le Carré books he left lying around his room when he was a teenager. I don't know what your life is like out there."

Not great, Sarah wanted to say. But she wasn't fishing for any sympathy from Ellie Bartowski. Nor did she think she wanted either of the Bartowskis to really know the truth of what it was like out there in the spy world. It was altogether too bleak.

With Chuck… Well, none of them really had a choice at this point, did they? He was going to find out sooner or later, and everything they all loved so much about him would break. She bit back tears of guilt and anger.

"He...hurt me, Ellie. And I know this will hurt him, but…" She let out a rough breath. "This all happened because…" She tried a different tack, having a hard time getting control of what she wanted to say. She really couldn't seem to find her footing. "Maybe none of it should've ever happened. Maybe he'd be a lot safer with some other partner."

"A partner who doesn't give a rat's ass about him? I'm not sure that's the best alternative."

"A partner who he isn't going to dive in front of a bullet for."

"He's a total jackass. A thoughtless, naive, rash jackass. And I hate that he's doing this. But he's doing it, Sarah, and… Well, I'd really prefer he has a partner who'd do the same for him. The bullet thing I mean. I think it's what both of you deserve."

I think it's what both of you deserve.

Sarah felt numb and like she would cry all at once. But she just shook her head. She didn't believe it. Chuck, yes. But not her.

"Look, I…" Ellie's phone buzzed and she went into her purse and pulled it out. "It's Devon. He just wants to make sure I'm alive." She tapped a few buttons and slipped her phone back in her bag. "I should probably go. But I just want you to know that I am still...weirded out by all this. Unsettled by the fact that you're a spy. That's...crazy. But I also get it. I get that this has all been a lot for you. And my brother pulling this shit with the NSA? It's unfair and it's naive and I still can't believe he's this...stupid. I get that you're internalizing it. I get why. And I get you wanting to get outta Dodge and not have to deal with him, or the rest of us, ever again. But I guess what I'm trying to say is...please don't."

She bit her lower lip to keep it from trembling and Sarah felt tears start in her own eyes. "I know how desperate I sound, begging you to stay and protect Chuck when you so clearly want to get outta here. But please, please…" She grabbed Sarah's hands in both of hers. "Please don't let him do this without you there. He trusts you more than he trusts anybody. He cares...probably more than you know. More than I'm comfortable saying, even if I just very blatantly alluded to it." Sarah blushed and ducked her head. "He told me that you've been his lifeline through all of this. Those were his words. I don't know that he can survive without your help. I can't lose him. I don't—I don't trust anyone else in this. That general lady, John… Please just...try. However you need to rationalize it to yourself. I understand if you don't want to be with him. Really be with him, I mean. Especially not after he lied to you. But I just don't know that he can get through this without his lifeline, Sarah. It isn't fair of me to ask, but please stay to help guide him through it all. I'm sorry. I'm rambling. I shouldn't have even said any of this—"

"No, it-it's okay, Ellie. I…" She what? She didn't know, so she just shook her head. "I can't...promise. I just can't."

"I get it," Ellie said with a nod. And then she squeezed Sarah's shoulder and stood up, wiping under her eyes with the sleeves of her sweater and sniffling. "And I guess I should thank you, huh?" Sarah stood up as well, furrowing her brow. "You've kept my brother alive these last six months. And you've been a good friend to me. So thank you."

And just like that, Ellie was hugging her tight. Sarah hugged her back just as tightly. She wasn't sure if Ellie meant it to be a maybe-goodbye hug, but Sarah meant it that way, and she squeezed even harder, shutting her eyes.

"Do you think Chuck'll be a good spy?" Ellie asked, still hugging her, her voice quiet.

"Yes," Sarah said. "He'll be incredible."

"That's what you're afraid of. Isn't it?"

"Yes," Sarah answered honestly.

Ellie pulled back from the hug. "No matter what you decide, Sarah, take some time. Let yourself rest. You don't owe him more than you've already given him. You don't owe any of us. But you owe yourself some time to just...get away. From him, us, the spying stuff. All of it. Turn off your phone and just...let yourself be apart from it all. We all need that. You're human. Just like the rest of us."

She rubbed Sarah's arm and left, just like that, the door clicking shut behind her. And Sarah was left standing by the bed, her knees weak, her head unsure, her heart even more unsure, not sure if there was ever a time when she'd felt more...human.

}o{

The next morning Sarah found herself sitting by the pool.

She hadn't left.

She was still in Los Angeles.

She hadn't left last night and, to be honest, she was beginning to wonder if she ever would. Ellie had pushed her over the edge. Or maybe it was more like she'd grabbed her by the scruff of her neck and yanked her back from where she'd be teetering over the edge.

Because amidst everything else Ellie had said to Sarah the night before, the thing that had stuck the hardest, the thing that dug inside of her the deepest, was that if she wasn't here, no one would protect him the way she would.

She was considering coming back with parameters. Like the same ones you took this assignment with originally? Sarah snorted. She looked around the pool and sighed. She thought she'd take a few days. Sit by the pool, read, recharge. As she was considering all of this, she was shocked to find her phone in her hand.

"How is he?" she texted, against her better judgment. But if she didn't, she'd continue to dwell on it. She waited a few minutes and wondered if she'd even get an answer. She figured that she probably wouldn't, when her phone beeped. She turned it over and looked at Ellie's reply.

"Surly. I threw away all of his cereal." Sarah giggled. He was an overgrown child. "Can I ask where you are?"

All Ellie got in reply was, "Yes." She grinned. God, the Bartowskis had so rubbed off on her.

"You've spent too much time around my brother." She wasn't wrong.

Sarah stared at Ellie's original question and bit her lip. She knew exactly what Ellie wanted to know. Whether she was gone, or whether she'd stayed. If she'd gone, she would've already ditched this phone by now. Ellie wouldn't know that, though. Of course.

"Same place I was yesterday." Sarah stuffed her phone deep inside of the bag she'd brought out to the pool and pulled a book out. She would read until her eyes fell out of her head, anything to keep herself from coming to terms with why she was still in Los Angeles.

}o{

Three days later she found herself in the same chair she had been in everyday since Ellie showed up unexpectedly at her door. She had decided, as much as she hated staying, she hated leaving even more. She wasn't surprised to see her phone in her hand again.

"I'm coming back," she typed. She waited with her thumb hovering over send. She was here. They were going to know about her decision eventually. And she decided after their talk the other night, Ellie was probably the first one she wanted to know. So she hit send.

She sat up and waited, turning the phone in her hands, over and over. Her phone beeped and she looked.

"Thank you." There was nothing for a few moments and then Ellie continued. "I won't be the one to tell him. He thinks I'm pissed at him….spoiler alert: I am." Sarah snorted.

"I'll tell him myself in the morning." She put her phone down when it went off again. She picked up the phone and her mouth dropped with shock.

"Hell no you won't. You take as many days as you need to take. Don't rush yourself if you need a longer break from this to figure things out. As long as you're coming back. As long as you promise to protect him."

"I will. And I'll take the time I need." She put her phone down and pulled her book back up again. Maybe next week would be better. Maybe that would give her the time to come to terms with everything, build up a plan of action. Next week she'd train Chuck Bartowski to be a spy. After she had the time she needed to settle everything in her mind. But she shook herself, willing all of that out of her head for now.

}o{

Chuck wiped his hands on his pants. If he had a time machine, he'd go back and kick his own ass. Ellie was furious with him and she had gotten rid of all the cereal he liked as well as all of the junk food in the apartment. She'd said something along the lines of, "if you want to be a God damn spy then you need to put better food in your body".

She asked a lot of questions about what he did, how his head felt, and how his training was going, but every time Sarah's name came up, the temperature of the room dropped a few degrees.

This morning Beckman had announced she was leaving Los Angeles to go back to Langley, and that the third member of the team would be joining them soon. Chuck had a million questions but the glare he received from both Beckman and Casey made him shut his mouth.

Now he was dressed for his shift at the Buy More, sitting at the table in Castle, dwelling over knowing he'd made the right decision but also knowing he should've been honest from the get-go...at the very least, he should've been honest about why he hadn't been honest… His brain was all mixed up, a mess...when he heard the door at the top of the stairs open.

He looked up distractedly and saw the orange Converse sneakers with the blue laces, the white capris… He looked down again, froze, and shot to his feet, gaping at her.

He felt a hand on his shoulder shove him back into his seat before he could straighten up, slamming hard into his chair, still staring.

"Sit down, numb nuts," Casey growled under his breath.

"Sarah," he whispered breathlessly. Casey grabbed a file and stuck it in his face, blocking his view of the woman walking down the stairs. Chuck flashed on the contents immediately.

"Christ," Casey muttered. "That was quick. But we kinda knew that would fix the problem, didn't we?" Casey did not say that last part quietly. "Agent Bartowski, meet your CIA partner, Agent Sarah Walker." Sarah stopped at the front of the table, looking at Casey and Chuck. The air was frozen between them. Chuck felt it. And apparently Casey did, too, because he asked awkwardly, "Do you two need to talk?"

Sarah nodded and Casey fled.

He didn't know what to do with the fact that she was standing in front of him again. He couldn't move. He didn't know what to say. But because he couldn't help it, he spoke anyway.

"Sarah—" Chuck began.

"No, you need to listen," Sarah said, the spy mask in place. Chuck's heart sank at seeing it there. "You made a decision and I am here to help you make that decision a reality. You don't know yet what that means, what it really means, so from here on out, you need to listen to someone who does. You do as I say. Do you understand?" Chuck nodded. Sarah shook her head and sighed. "You really don't, and that's my fault, but I can't fix that at the moment. You've made it clear what you want."

"Sarah, I'm sorry—" Chuck began again.

"Chuck, we are spies. That's it. We aren't friends, we're spies. We're a team."

"Sarah, I—" Chuck began a third time, feeling his heart in his throat.

"You wanted to be a spy, so that's what you're gonna be. I've agreed to help train you to be a spy. You need to understand that there's no room for anything else. Because if we fuck this up, you could slip, and if you slip, you might die." She stared at him for a second, the mask still there. "Casey!" she yelled, never taking her eyes off of him. "You can come back now!"

Chuck glanced at the doorway Casey had escaped through, then looked back at her, feeling completely bereft and overwhelmed all at once. She was determined to make this all business, he could see, so he decided to play it her way, swallowing excuses and explanations, trying to get a hold of himself, and nodding.

"So what do we do?" he asked quietly.

"We do our jobs," Sarah replied. He watched as she flicked her gaze to the side, shifting her weight. "The best way to handle this is to see where you are. You're running point on this mission."

"The hell?" Casey muttered coming back into the room and walking right to the table.

"Wha?" Chuck said at the same time.

Sarah gave Casey a shut up look and turned to Chuck. "Neither Casey or I have any real advantage running point here, so this is the perfect opportunity for us to see what you can do before the training. So we know where to start."

Casey looked like he thought this was the worst idea, but if Sarah wanted it this way, he'd agree. Anyway, it gave him a chance to prove himself, to prove to her that he was cut out for this. He felt a chill go through him in spite of that thought.

"Okay," Chuck replied, nodding with determination. "Who's our target?"

"Gun runner by the name of Giles," Casey said, still giving Sarah a look as he tossed Chuck a folder. He opened it and scanned through it. Then he looked up at Casey, shook his head, and went back to the folder. "What?"

"I mean, you'd think they'd use their whole name their parents gave them," Chuck mumbled, still digging through the folder.

"Chuck," Sarah said gently, making him raise his head. "The less info someone has on you, the less likely they are to figure out who you are."

"Oh," Chuck said softly. "Makes sense." He lowered his head and then stopped. He looked back at Sarah. "Why not just use an alias?"

Sarah turned to Casey, who had an amused look on his face. "You wanna take that one?"

"Hell no, this has been all me the last two weeks. You're his handler, you handle him."

"Excuse me," Chuck cut in, making both of them look at him. "I am not for anyone to handle. I am an agent. Now, I get it, I know next to nothing, but I'm not worried, you know why? I have two of the best spies ever training me." He gave them each meaningful looks, then hardened his jaw. "I can do this."

He shut the folder and tucked it under his arm, leaving them both behind as he left the room.


A/N: Thanks for reading! Please leave us reviews. We appreciate them a lot.

-SC and DC