I can't go anywhere, I can't do anything
No, I can't close my eyes without you in my dreams
You won't leave me alone
even though I know you're gone - I See You by Luke Bryan

Shota woke in the morning feeling refreshed. Totally well-rested. He stretched his arms in an arch of toned flesh, making his neck and back straighten with a couple low pops. He felt wonderful. Then he remembered where he was and why. A twin bed, not big enough for him, yet they'd slept in it together last night. An unused student room which will be filled with a new American hero tomorrow when they flew in.

He was legitimately sad. He thought he would be, but just thinking about time moving onward without Mara's laughs to fuel it? It seemed impossible. He got out of bed buttoning his jeans and then hunting for the discarded shirt and shoes that he'd worn last night.

His dreams had been full of Mara, as he'd wanted, but they were all so sad and lonely. Even with his memories, recollections and knowledge of her coloring in the edges. He was losing the outlines, but the broad strokes of the dreams he'd had were still clinging mercilessly to his consciousness. It almost felt like a punishment more than a reward. His own terrible luck strikes again.

Closing the door with a soft click he tried to walk slowly to the common area. He tried to act like his life hadn't been turned upside down and shaken in some sort of metaphysical hold-up. He tried to act like nothing was wrong. In the eyes of his students he saw that he was failing miserably at the pretense. Ochaco watched him pass with so much sorrow on her face Shota wanted to stop to ask what was wrong. Though he was afraid he already knew the answer.

On lengthening strides he got away from Alliance Heights and moved toward his apartment in the teacher's building. Though he was not sure he would find peace there, it would be less terrible if he were alone. Except for the cat! He'd forgotten about his new roomie, and sprinted home to make reparations.

A soft purring rumble greeted him, as Dom stropped himself against Shota's legs. Obviously the cat hadn't cared too much, probably used to Nemuri's hero work and school hours. He patted him between his ears, and snagged a can of food off the counter, popping the lid and dumping the contents into Dom's bowl.

"Thanks for not being mad," Shota spoke softly to the cat. "I didn't mean to leave you without food. I'll be better."

He straightened, and then went to his room, stripping for a shower. He could swear he could still smell Mara on his skin, and if he had any hope of forgetting her, he had to get all the clothes washed and himself. Her memory clung to his skin like an ephemeral burr. He needed to be rid of it. He walked into the bath and stopped dead at the mirror.

He leaned forward, fingering his hair that had been gathered and braided. He smiled, though he hadn't wished to, and ran fingers over the fancy braid, not knowing how he'd managed to miss that his hair wasn't falling in his face all morning. With a sigh of annoyance that he needed to dismantle Mara's parting gift, he did so with quick movements.

Then he spotted something else, black marks on his skin. He frowned, lifting one arm, and turning this way and that, with the other hand pulling the skin tight so he could see what else she'd done. Deciphering the message backward made his brows draw down and a snort escape. He read it again: what looked like a phone number and 'if you feel stupid'.

He did feel stupid, but he needed to forget, not call and continue feeling stupid. He could feel a curl of happiness tickle though his being. She still cared, she wanted a connection. He got into the shower and tried his darndest to stuff that feeling into a dark corner and snuff it like a cigarette. He scrubbed his back extra hard.

When he was out, dressed, and ready to eat his breakfast, he sat at the table thumbing through the day's reports. He took a bite, chewing the warmed smoked fish slowly as he read over the newest casualty reports. Things weren't as bad as he feared after hearing about heroes that had tossed their tights with their dignity.

The evacuations were working. The students were safe in the fortified, interconnected schools. He looked over the reports pertaining to just UA. Kapu and Mara had been busy setting up both an emergency medical and a general clinic. Cafeteria rotations, hobby workshops, and even new training schedules for students in the hero course of all grades. The author of the report enthused on how these programs kept the children, all of them, less anxious and the adults enjoyed having things to do with their time besides worry.

Dom sprawled on the floor in his living room in a patch of sunlight, leaving Shota to his thoughts. They kept turning to a woman and a showdown in her bedroom that he would never forget. Red lace panties and a tank top that left nothing but the feel of her skin to the imagination. That was apparently enough to give him hours of improper thoughts. He angrily stood and washed his breakfast dishes before he headed down to Rush's for a coffee and a change of scenery.

Thus his day slid by on a tide of unwanted thoughts and heart-twisting feelings. He'd known the first time he saw her stand up for herself and yell at him, making sure to work in an underhanded comment about being a pervert, that he wanted to see her again. His dreams had little to do with it. He missed her and she hadn't been gone for a half-day yet. He couldn't remember the last time a woman had challenged him. Or a woman who made him act like a fool in a war-zone. Or forced him to steal a kiss like a horny teenager.

The more those thoughts swirled around his brain, the harder they were to dismiss. He went looking to train with Shinso, just for the boy to get frustrated at his irritability and throw his capture scarf at his head. Hizashi was not much better. When Shota caught up with him, the other man had made fun of him just once, yet it was enough to make Shota threaten him with violence. He couldn't live like this. He had to figure things out.

He started by finding the folder he'd gotten the other day with Mara's particulars in it. Her agency in Seattle, a quick history, and a short criminal report. He'd read the criminal report, still stinging from that first confrontation. It said only that most of her records were sealed since all her crimes had been committed before puberty. He checked his watch, and cursed. He'd have to wait until midnight to call and speak to a human. He needed her number. He cursed himself soundly. He had it earlier today. Damn him for being a stubborn fool.

He redressed in workout clothes and spent a couple of hours killing his thoughts while running and weight-training in the gym. He ran back, showered, ordered up a dinner from Rush's and fell asleep on the couch waiting for midnight to roll around.

The night was beautiful. It was clear and stars sparkled overhead, even here in the middle of the city. The ten-floor building wasn't ideal for star watching, but it was perfect for watching the streets below. It had to have been just over twenty degrees, and he relented, unzipping his jacket enough to feel the night more fully. The breeze picked up, and… his hair did not whip in his face. He reached up, finding his hair in an elaborate braid.

"It's braided," Mara's soft voice floated out from behind him, and Shota turned. She was wearing a sexy version of his usual gear. Black pants that looked too tight to fight crime in, paired with a black sport bra and a black windbreaker that gaped enough in front to make him want to touch her skin again. She even had a version of his utility belt slung around her hips. A pair of silver-plated handcuffs dangling from the belt made him laugh.

"I know a braid when I feel one." He gestured at her, "I see your braids are back. I liked it the other way better." Nothing happened and he shrugged. In the grand scheme of life, changing his opinion on her braids didn't matter.

She shook a handful of slim braids at him, "I see you like these fine. That's good. That much hair would only get in the way if I had to fight someone."

"There's no one here but me," he quipped and she laughed. God, he missed her laughter. "I can think of a million things I want to do with you, but fighting? I'm sure it won't end well."

"No? Afraid to lose to a girl?"

He gave her a crooked grin, "Afraid to win." He turned away, "I'm sorry for the way things sifted out."

She nodded, dream-Mara only knowing his thoughts, she would agree to just about anything. "Do you love me, too?"

Shota startled. He kept his eyes down, the whoosh of traffic below the only sound as the moment stretched. "I don't know."

She shook her head and snorted, "I'm the only one here, Shota. Don't lie to me." He continued to stare at the night-shrouded city in silence and she touched him, a feather light caress. "I love you, Shota. You know I do. Stop running from it and admit that you love me, too."

He hung his head, his braid pulling on the sides of his scalp. It was a dream, he knew that. If he couldn't say it here, to himself, where could he? Who could it hurt to admit his feelings here? A perfect evening perched on his favorite building with the stars twinkling and the literal woman of his dreams waiting to hear those magical words. In English there were three, and he knew the words were said so often in conjunction with cats and corndogs that he hesitated to use them.

"Ai shiteru." He breathed out, his chest feeling like it had been tied with rope. "I don't know why I couldn't say it."

"It's been a long time." Mara leaned against him. She gave him a one armed squeeze that Shota snuggled into. Being like this with her was easy. Like the life he was living before was not the real him.

Shota shrugged, "I have never said that to another human." She kissed him on his stubbled cheek. "I will say it to you, the real you. I am going to talk to you. The struggle isn't good for me."

"I hope it's enough."

Shota sighed, "It will have to be. This is all I have."

In Maui

Kahui pulled the keys out of the deep pocket of his traveling coat. He loved this coat, it was hard to pick-pocket and he looked amazing in it. He shrugged out of it though, and sailed through the house to the temperature controls and turned them all back to human comfort levels. His black eyes tracked his friend.

Mara trailed behind him, her bag slung over her shoulder, bulging with clothes that she decided to keep. She looked rumpled and out-of-sorts. He knew some of what had happened, being the excellent friend that he was. On the private plane from Tokyo to Manilla, she laid on his arm and wept openly. Dragging out parts of the tale like removing a hooked splinter.

On their commercial flight to Maui she'd slept, her hair tied back, but tangled and limp where locks hung over her shoulder. She'd floated through customs and snoozed for the ride home. She was now standing wearily in the hallway, her body drooping.

"Babe. You're falling asleep in the hallway. Your room is ready if you want to crash."

Mara nodded, "You're the best. Okay. I'll wake up never." A yawn cracked her jaw and she didn't even bother to hide it. "What day is it?"

"Yesterday, I think." Kahui cocked his hip, "It doesn't matter. Sleep. I'll get things set up around here."

She marched off like an obedient soldier and he slapped her ass as she passed him, earning an unamused glance back before she disappeared into his guest room. It really was ready for her. He had not lied when he said that she was his only friend. At least the only friend he had that he liked well enough to let stay with him and not sleep in his room.

He wandered out to the lanai, allowing his gaze to roam the startling contrast of green, black, and turquoise that made up the landscape of the Island he loved best. He'd been born in Oahu, but Maui's sparkling sand and sparse population made him feel like he was finally home the first time he'd come. He nearly jumped out of his skin when the landline rang.

He was positive that he'd alerted his secretary that he was going on vacation with Mara for a week. Why in the all-father's name has she allowed a call though on the business line? He slid the glass door open and jogged to the office.

"This had better be an emergency." He answered the phone in a gruff voice.

"It is," Shota's voice came over clearly. "I told your watchdog that you left this number with me in a bar before you left Japan. She thought that was hilarious and agreed to let me ring though. I think I was a very convincing aggrieved lover."

"I just bet." Kahui hitched the phone under his jaw and left the office to finish putting out the towels and beach gear that Mara would want when she could drag her carcass out of her room. "So. To what do I owe the pleasure? If it's not good, I'm going to call Malia and tell her that you're on the no-call list."

"Ahh." Shota paused for a moment. "I wanted to talk about Mara."

Kahui's brows rose to his hairline, "What about her?"

"I want to talk to her. She left a number on my back, so I think she wants to talk to me, too."

"That does sound plausible." He scoffed, "Am I jet-lagged? On your back? You know what, forget it. If she left you a number, why didn't you call it?"

"That's harder to explain." Shota paused, "Is she there? Her agency said that her contract with you calls for one week vacation after working with you. So I thought since you are from Hawaii…"

"Maui. And she is here, but I doubt she'll be up until later if not tomorrow. Whatever you did to her wrecked her out physically and emotionally."

"I'm sorry." Shota's sough made Kahui's scalp prickle. He could almost feel the love hormones over the line. "It's like 2-ish your time? When can I call back?"

Kahui gripped the phone. He was right about sensei, it seemed. He did not dislike Mara at all, but had.. Oh, he felt like a proud parent suddenly. "Maybe you shouldn't call back. Do you have a pen?" Kahui rattled off his cell number. "Take a vacation and say what you need to say in person. If she rejects you, I'll put you up in a hotel. There's nothing like the beach for a broken heart. If she accepts your apology, then you can stay here with us."

"What is your relationship exactly? I don't remember much about our first conversation, but after the second I wasn't sure. I know she doesn't like you romantically, though. So, do I have competition?"

"For her affection? None at all, I assure you. I was rather hoping your sexual fantasies ran toward sexy doctors, but alas." He snorted at his own joke, "Make arrangements. Call when you land. And Shota?"

"Yeah?"

"Let's try and do things her way, huh? It's for the best. Mara is one in a hundred million, and if I'm not being too rude, you'll have shot yourself in the foot if you screw up again. Come with a clear idea of what you want and she'll make it work."

"Thank you, Kapu."

"Just for you: Kahui. See you soon, Shota."

Kahui smiled and strolled back into his office to replace the receiver. He was elated for his friend and now he had a reason to get some sleep, too. Mara would be okay. He was inexplicably relieved.


AN/ I couldn't find anywhere where it says Midnight named the cat. So, I named it 'Dom' to fit with her dominatrix persona. So, Kahui is still a jerk, but he really, really loves Mara. And apparently matchmaking. LOL I'll have to add that to his character sheet. For my beta Mosevic, thank you for all your help!