Stay On Your Side

AN: Little longer chapter this time. Been hard at work, and running out of time to get some things done, but I'm still plugging along :D In fact, I got a couple more ideas I've been working on, including a new genre for me, G I JOE. Was always a fan of the 80s cartoon, and I loved the live action movies, so I've had a little idea percolating for it. Expanding my horizons and venturing into new territory again.

Hope everyone is doing well.

Let me know what you think!

o-o

-o-

o-o

"So, how are we going to handle the charging arrangement?" Prowl asked.

"Four or five mechs to a berth?" Jazz put in.

"You forget, at least two will have to charge with the twins," Prowl added.

There was a low hum as the command unit tried to figure out the best possible arrangement. The Second and Third In Command knew the twins weren't the best mechs to charge with. From eons of war, charging how, when, and where they could while protecting comrades, everyone in the Autobot forces had shared sleeping arrangements with the twins.

And tried to avoid repeating the situation.

Sunstreaker was randomly violent. IF you were lucky, he'd only punch and kick in his charge. More violent rest cycles were punctuated by stabbing, dismemberment, impromptu spark extraction, and biting.

Sideswipe was a snuggler and snickered evilly, making one's plating crawl when the surroundings were dark or creepy. Bots mentioned it was like charging next to a cyber hyena.

But there was little option at the moment.

The volcano hiccupped in the middle of the night, lava flowing into a third of their quarters. Prime was currently petitioning the local government to grant land to build a city. He was encountering opposition at every turn. The humans didn't want the metal beings to build a place of their own, though they often commented during their many visitations that the giants required more space. Since the Dinobots and Aerialbots joined their ranks, the ARK had become rather cramped.

Even more so now as several bots lost their quarters to the intensity of the volcano.

Preceptor mentioned the Dinobot's tunneling may have led to their current predicament.

Prowl took advantage of Prime's silence to send out a call over comms for charging arrangements. He'd have to rearrange the duty roster as well, depending on the requests. Not surprisingly, everyone were amicable with whoever they'd be paired with but also insisted the twins be assigned other accommodations.

The comms filled with vulgarity from the twins, mostly Sunstreaker. It didn't help having Ratchet offer running praise on Sunstreaker's extensive, and impressively inventive vocabulary.

Prowl mentally sighed. Why did he have to deal with the twins? Why was he cursed with them? If he believed in Primus and fate, he would have asked what horrible thing he'd done to deserve such a curse.

"I take your silence means you're inquiring for volunteers to berth with the twins," Prime said.

Prowl nodded. "Affirmative, Sir." One doorwing flicked. "And the consensuses is no one wants to share with the twins, who are now fluently cursing over comms."

Prime accessed the frequency and sure enough, the garbled mess filled his audios.

"Understandable," he said, shutting down comms. Honestly, his troops were more like sparklings than matured adults. And Ratchet's goading and tutorials didn't help matters.

"The twins requested anyone but minibots," Prowl informed his leader, and Jazz, who was enjoying the vulgarity over comms.

Prime felt sorry for his Second. Certainly his job never entailed such things when he first took the post. But Prowl took his assessments with dignity and grace, never complaining about his unexpected workload.

Prime hated to admit, but he'd be fragged without Prowl.

"Put them with us," Prime said.

Prowl shuttered his optics and ran a system check. There were no anomalies. His hearing was as sharp as ever. Maybe he misunderstood?

"Sir?"

"Put the twins on charge rotation with us," Prime reiterated. He hoped Prowl didn't lock up.

"And why would I do such a thing?" Prowl asked. He suddenly got the feeling Prime had lost his mind. OR had a death wish. Prowl certainly didn't have one.

"Because the twins respect us and therefore, their behavior will be less violent."

"Respect us?"

The thought was ludicrous to Prowl. The twins hated Prowl. They tortured him to no end.

And the pranks! They were reason enough to mention a firing squad.

That confirmed it. Prime was out of his fragging mind! As if reading Prowl's thoughts, Prime spoke.

"I know you doubt it, but trust me. The twins respect us."

Both doorwings drooped in disbelief. It was the closest Prowl ever came to gaping in shock.

"Make no mistake," Prime was saying, "they could terminate us in a sparkbeat. But they obey the rules and don't inflict severe damage on us or their comrades."

"Dislocated doorwings, blown tires, glued to berths, tables, wall, the ceiling," Prowl argued. "You don't consider that 'severe damage?'"

"Irritations," Prime corrected. "But considering their ruthless nature and ability to terminate without hesitation, their pranks and minor injuries are nothing compared to what they are capable of. They could terminate every one of us in our charge, but they submit to my command and your punishments for infractions."

It was official. Prime lost his fragging mind.

"Sir, perhaps you should take some time off?"

"I'm not crazy, Prowl," Prime assured his officer.

Prowl offered an undignified snort, a thing unheard of until recently.

Prime remembered when Prowl first arrived and witnessed his first Praxian crash. Terrified, Prime had called for a medic. Coincidently, that was also Ratchet's first day as CMO as his predecessor sacrificed himself to save the last survivor of Praxus.

Prime paused.

Only now did it occur to him how closely linked everyone was. The human expression was 'Seven Degrees of Separation.' Prime's crew was a mishmash of regions and frame types. The fact they had come together to fit so perfectly left no doubt they were intended to be this way.

"You have to admit, the twins have calmed down over time."

Prowl recalled the first time he met the twins. They had picked fights with the handful of huge, bulky triple changers who had joined the Autobots… and sent every one of them to Ratchet. When asked why they had picked the fight, both smirked and confided they needed a challenge.

But over the eons, the fights died down. Whether it was from lack of opponents or the maturity, they now put more effort into more respective outlets for their energy.

Well, Sunstreaker was respective.

Sideswipe was merely annoying, taking it upon himself to see how much trouble he could inflict and consequently, have to pay brig time. His pranks weren't so bad in the beginning but they were increasing the longer he stayed on Earth. Something about the planet brought out the imp in him.

"Never thought the twins could be calm," Prowl scoffed.

"Doubtful they will ever be fully domesticated, but with time and patience, they may yet surprise us."

"They already have," Prowl muttered. "I still have squirrel droppings in my office."

Prime suppressed a laugh. Sideswipe had relocated a dozen squirrels to Prowl's office, a song about a Mississippi squirrel blaring from his speakers as Prowl chased the woodland critters out of the ARK.

"Put them on charge cycle with us," Prime offered, taking the heavy responsibility of charging with the two menaces.

"Sir, by my estimation, there is an 81.7622% chance such an arrangement will lead to a disaster," Prowl stated, battle computer running complex computations.

"I'll be fine," Prime said.

"You know their reputation," Prowl tried a different tactic. "Especially Sunstreaker's."

"I think I'm big enough to take whatever punishment he may inflict in his charge," Prime said, rising to his full height, dwarfing Prowl by a measure.

Prowl's brow ridge quirked. "And Sideswipe?"

"If I can charge through bombs falling during a war zone, I can handle a giggler," Prime deadpanned.

Prowl's expression softened. Prime had a point.

"And myself?" Prowl asked, wondering if he could change berth assignments. He didn't fancy charging with either of the twins. "Why have I been added to this unstable equation against my will?"

"Though you don't believe it, Prowl, the twins do respect you," Prime said.

"And the grabbing of my doorwings?" Prowl persisted hotly. "The rough handling I'm forced to endure for their amusement?"

"It's their way of showing affection," Prime concluded.

"I'd rather they hate me," Prowl couldn't hide the shudder. "If I must charge with them, I'll have to have Ratchet disable my receptors."

"They won't hurt you," Prime said bemused, rolling his optics. Prowl could be such a drama bot sometimes.

"Can I have that in writing?" Prowl gave a long suffering sigh, adding, "I will inform the crew of the new charging arrangements."

He took his leave, hoping to catch some rest in his office before retiring for the evening. If he had to charge with the twins, odds were he'd end up being woken by pain in some form or another.

Unfortunately, Prowl's distraction cost him a booby trap laid by a certain ruby Lamborghini. Not paying attention, Prowl opened a drawer on his desk to extract a datapad, and discovered three mouse traps, which dislocated two digits.

When evening fell, mechs loitered about, uncomfortable with sharing living space, if only for a short time while the volcano had colic and unsure how to proceed to their quarters in a dignified fashion…that wouldn't result in catcalling from a Lamborghini.

Prime was in his quarters, sitting at his desk, rubbing tired optics from the bureaucratic red tape the humans were throwing up to impede him. Sideswipe bounded in unannounced and immediately plopped down on Prime's spacious berth.

The ruby afthead was rubbing and shimmying all over the surface, trying to find a comfortable position.

"Make yourself at home," Prime said, more bemused than irritated.

"So, what did you do to piss off Prowl and get stuck with us?" Sideswipe asked, kneading the berth as a giant ruby cat trying to get comfortable.

"I volunteered," Prime supplied, hiding his amusement.

Sideswipe was trying to take up as much of the berth as he could, his way of lying claim to territory. He sprawled over the berth, draping pedes on one side while reaching over with his arms. He barely hung over the edge. He grinned upside down at Prime.

"You want me, admit it," he goaded.

Prime snickered. He wasn't immune to Sideswipe's practical jokes. Course, he wasn't pranked as often, but when he least expected it, he was the recipient of a well placed prank.

Or sometimes, not so well placed.

There were still scratch marks on his aft plates from Sideswipe's little joke with brillo pads.

"If I had half your ego," Prime retorted just as the door beeped. "Enter!"

Prowl entered, took one look at Sideswipe and his doorwings hiked into an even tighter "V." He made to exit again, probably to hide in his office, but Sunstreaker arrived. By the look on his face, he wasn't pleased with the charging arrangements either.

"I can come back later," Prowl muttered but Sideswipe crowed from the berth.

"Get over here, you sexy doorwinger!" Sideswipe flopped to his stomach and motioned with his forefinger in a 'come hither' gesture.

Prowl was not amused, nor persuaded by such presentation.

"I'd rather spend the evening catching up on my paperwork," Prowl responded.

Sunstreaker plucked the tactician's datapad out of his servos and scanned the screen, ignoring Prowl's sputtering protests. Prowl was wise enough to not touch the golden mech or wrestle away his property.

"Prowl, this schedule is for… November," Sunstreaker said with a scowl. "But it's only June. You're setting up schedules…. 5 months in advance?"

Prowl held out his hand patiently. "I must plan ahead for contingencies."

Sunstreaker handed the datapad back. "What kind of contingencies calls for a 5 month advancement?"

"If I am ever disabled, injured, or terminated, it would be wise to have certain tedious, though necessary, details preplanned and ready to be executed while a suitable replacement may be trained." Prowl stated as if it was the most obvious thing in the world.

"Prowl, you could be in stasis and you'd still figure out a way to do your job," Sideswipe laughed. He had witnessed the SIC's dedication to some rather tough extremes.

"Then in the case of my termination, this base will need such precautionary measures to ensure proper functioning and prevent any possible disruption," Prowl said flatly.

Merely hearing the SIC describe his own termination, and subsequent replacement, so stoic and logical, made the twins angry, and in Sunstreaker's case, uncomfortable. They didn't like the idea of never having their favorite doorwinged menace to keep them in line.

No one could send a bot to the brig or state regulation quite like Prowl. He had a flair for the rules.

Sideswipe rose on Prime's berth, antics long forgotten in favor of the seriousness of the situation. He held out his hand to Prowl, who observed the servo with disdain and suspicion. But Sideswipe kept his hand extended until Prowl finally relented. When he did, Sideswipe grasped his hand, yanking him forward with a startled beep, and encased the SIC with a bear hug.

Prowl's doorwings were doing an impression of Snarl's stegosaurus plate.

"You're not going anywhere, Prowl," Sideswipe said, voice muffled by Prowl's bumper. "Sunny and I will make sure of it! We'll watch your aft. We'll make sure you come back safe."

"While I appreciate the sentiment, I don't appreciate the physical display," Prowl grumbled, extracting himself from Sideswipe with a scowl. He had gotten used to the Lambo and his cuddly nature after eons of companionship. "Need I remind you, we are in the middle of a war? There are no guarantees of survival. For anyone."

"You'll make it," Sideswipe said in that charmingly idiotic way that grated Prowl's logic circuits. "With all the planning you do, calculating every possibility and making contingency plans, and with us watching your aft, you'll definitely survive to see the end of the war."

"Enough of this conjecture," Prowl said, distinctly uncomfortable, and not from Sideswipe's display of affection. It was his declaration. Totally fallible, of course. No way Sideswipe could guarantee survival in a war. But the idea he felt so strongly touched Prowl's spark. Not that he could show it and remain professional, aloof, disconnected. He had a reputation to uphold. "How are we going to handle the charging arrangements?"

"Well, what works for me is, I curl up beside you, holding you close, and let you hear my calming voice to lull you to charge," Sideswipe said, falling back on the berth and holding up his arms as if expecting Prowl to fall into them.

Prowl huffed, crossing his arms over his chest and throwing Prime a long suffering gaze.

Prime stepped up, having been observing his unruliest soldier confronted with his friendliest enemy and engage in common banter.

"Prowl, since your frame type requires a certain amount of care, what would be the best position for you to prevent damage?" Prime asked.

"In my arms!" Sideswipe crooned with a hooting laugh.

"Given the circumstances, and Sunstreaker's violent tendencies, I believe it would be wise to be as far away from him as possible," Prowl said, casting an approving optic to Sunstreaker, who didn't object to the evaluation.

"Well, I'm charging in the front, so the rest of you will have to be behind me," Sunstreaker growled, optics darkening with underlying threat.

It was a natural position for a frontliner to assume. If there was any alarm in the night, they would be closest to the door to answer the call or defend those behind them. It's the same reason Sunstreaker never sat with his back to a door.

"But, I'll need to get up several times a night to pee!" Sideswipe interjected.

The other bots ignored him.

"I believe our best configuration, is to have myself near the wall, with Prime in front of me, Sideswipe, then you, Sunstreaker, in your favorable position."

"Oh, baby," Sideswipe crowed.

"Idiot," Sunstreaker groused. "And that won't work. Sideswipe is a cuddler and the slagger likes to wrap himself around you like a second plating, so I don't want him near me."

"I'm hurt," Sideswipe said, feigning pain in his spark.

"Get over it,' Sunstreaker snapped irritably. He was tired and grumpy and he really needed a charge before early shift.

Prowl's battle computer commenced, factoring in suggestions, possibilities, previous histories, examples, and countermeasures and sighed when only one solution gained a high success rate for all mech's charging without incurring injury.

Though it was a slim chance of only 34%. The other options didn't factor above the 2% range of rest and injury-free charge.

"Very well," Prowl said, motioning for Sideswipe to get up. "Then the best choice would be with myself placed near the wall, to prevent certain parties from damaging my frame," Prowl glared poignantly at Sideswipe, who had the good graces to blush sheepishly, "then Sideswipe, Prime, and finally, Sunstreaker."

"Sounds good to me," Sunstreaker said, motioning toward the spacious berth. "Lie down and shut up."

"He has such a commanding presence," Sideswipe laughed, pretending to help Prowl get settled, but only irritating the SIC. Prowl swatted Sideswipe's servos from his doorwings and glared as Sideswipe rapped the SIC on the bumper as he lay down beside him. "Knock, knock, officer!"

"Oh, Primus," Prowl groaned. It was going to be a LONG charge cycle.

"Oh, say that again, only with more feeling this time,' Sideswipe goaded, but was instantly quelled when Prime laid down, pressing next to the frontliner and extending his EM field harshly. Rebuked, Sideswipe settled down as Sunstreaker took up a tactical rest position. "How long do you think we'll have to share a berth?"

"According to Perceptor's calculations, the volcano will settle itself within the week," Prime said, glad Sideswipe wasn't ignoring protocol and pestering his three berth mates into possibly terminating him. "Until then, we must make due with the arrangements."

"Think Wheeljack can set off a device, like cold fusion or something, and get the volcano to chill out?" Sideswipe asked, throwing an arm over Prime while simultaneously shimmying his aft on Prowl's leg.

There was a long pause.

"Tomorrow, I will inquire of Wheeljack and Perceptor of the suggestion," Prowl stated.

Prime turned down the lights. Silence fell. Engines lowered to a dull hum as four mechs began their cycle down routines.

Then out of the darkness, came Sideswipe's voice.

"I'm warning you two, I better not feel a tire iron, or someone is going to be in trouble!"

Two bots laughed heartily while the third tried to understand the humor. Once the innuendo was understood, he too began to chuckle.

Maybe charging with the twins wouldn't be a total disaster?

Then Sideswipe began to giggle.

o-o

-o-

o-o

Hope everyone enjoyed! Be sure to click the button and let me know what you think.

Reviews are LOVED, and signed reviews are answered (if there's inquiries)