I took out a torch and we proceeded slowly. As in this smelled like Admiral Akbar would pop anytime. We came across many statues, nuns with swords, knights with lances, even cherubs with daggers.

Rin caressed the lifelike statue of a chubby fella with wings.
-"Why depict weapons even on these lovely babies?"

The answer came when one of them turned its neck, a crack running across the stone. It spoke, its childlike form contrasting against the deep rumble of stone.
-"Pietas."

I took Rin behind my frame and projected a construction maul since a sword here would be pointless.
Hehe...
-"What did it say?"

She put her back to mine, the corner of my eye catching a statue of a mean nun with a poleaxe.
-"Piety. If they are pious, why do they wield weapons?"

My maul caught the cherub, too heavy to fly even if its tiny wings were flapping.
-"I do the killing but you do the talkin'!"

A knight came low with a spear, a thrust aimed at my feet.
-"PIEEETAAS."

I leapt over it and crushed the helmeted face, yet it still continued to swing.
-"Any time now would be great."

My wife casted a wind spell and it raised up a wall of dust. We started sneezing and our eyes watered.

A stone priest knocked the wind out of my lungs with an iron chandelier.
-"YeeeouuUUuuuch!"

Rin's cry resonated on the walls. She pointed to the reliefs on the cave.
-"Kneel!"

I knelt and they still tried to chop me.
-"KNEEELING BUT THEY AIN'T STOPPING!"

Rin jumped over me and slapped the maul from my hands. At once the statues stopped.
-"Low and unarmed. Don't touch any of your weapons."

I put my arms behind my head and looked at the roof.
-"What is a weapon? I mean, I get that swords and spears were around the time they created them...but..."
My left caressed the ring of one of my grenades.

-"PIETY."

I retracted it.
-"Weird. They know that is a weapon."

Rin tapped her lips, her chin resting on top of my chest.
-"Maybe some bounded field which detects intent. To be flexible enough to detect future weapons...this work is truly the hallmark of true geniuses."

I rolled my better half slowly and started to raise. As soon as my form stopped hunching over, MeanNun pointed her poleaxe in my direction. Immediately hunching again, she returned to her previous post.
-"We are going to be hunchbacks by the end of this."

In this fashion, we continued exploring. I won't tell names, but some pureblood Magus, who wasn't I, was shaking with so much excitement that I swear she started to vibrate.
-"Dear, watch your steps."

She swatted my hands aside.
-"I know what IIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIMmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmm..."

I peered over the hole and waited for the splash, we were in Venice after all.
-"Are you oka...FREEZE."

Rin cradled her left leg.
-"What?"

I bit my lips and adrenaline kicked my brain in high gear. After all, it wasn't every day that you see a room full of snakes.
-"Zelrecht-damned snakes."