The group returned to Alex's place to get changed before the guests arrived. The ladies were in Alex's room as Rafael and Sonny were in the guest room doing whatever. Abbie and Olivia changed in the open room. They both put on jeans. Abbie put an oversize tank top on. Olivia put on a white fitted tee.
"That's a cute tattoo, when did you get it?" Abbie asked Olivia.
"When I turned eighteen," Olivia explained in the easiest way. "Do you have any?"
"No, but once we retire, Serena and I are going to get matching tattoos for our wedding." Abbie two bottles of ciders, she handed one to Liv. Olivia took the bottle without saying anything to Abbie.
"That sounds so sweet."
"Okay!" Alex shouted out walking out of the bathroom. "What do you think?" She was wearing black high waist shorts. Her red short sleeve button down clung to her silhouette. She had it tucked into her shorts with having the first for four buttons undone. She curled her hair. Olivia was at loss of words not knowing where to look at the goddess standing in front of her. "Yeah, I should change."
"No…" She took a step forward, "No, you look great."
Alex smiled as she tucked her hair behind her ear. She stepped closer to Olivia, "Thank you." She took the bottle out of Olivia's hand and sipped from it. "Abbie, yes or no." She looked at the brunette who was watching the two.
"If Olivia says yes, who am I to say no." Olivia heard what Abbie said, she quickly stepped away. "What did your mother say of the change of the program?"
Alex was hurt on how Olivia pulled away from the moment so quickly, "Well I didn't stay to hear her. So I'll probably hear from her in practice soon." She toasted to Abbie.
"Alexandra I'm loving this new side of you."
"I'm an adult. This is my year. I don't need Jane Cabot to be so involved I can do this on my own." Alex lifted her chin so proudly.
"I'm so proud of you." Abbie hugged Alex, "Come this deserves a shot." Abbie pulled Alex's arm to walk to the kitchen.
The party started when Alex had the patio doors opened for everyone to enjoy the pool and the music. Everyone was having a good time, between playing typical party games. Casey and Abbie made a jungle juice for everyone to enjoy, and a self-serve station, so Olivia didn't dare try to make any drinks. Olivia liked hanging outside, she loved seeing New York lights from twenty stories up.
Alex was sitting on the couch staring outside. She was drinking in her third bottle of beer. She was trying to figure out Olivia. She's gotten close, they've shared moments, and places. She knows it is right. Olivia pulls away from her faster than she moves in. Olivia didn't say anything to Alex about her skate. She took another sip of beer. She didn't know what her next step could be, she was lost of ideas. She looked down on the bottle.
"You're not going to find the answers at the bottom of the bottle." Abbie sat down next to Alex. "But here." She handed Alex one of the jello shots they made the previous day.
Alex took the shot with Abbie, "What's wrong with me?" She looked at Abbie. "Am I not worth being in a relationship with?"
"Al," Abbie gave her a soft voice.
"You were with me, was I that bad?"
"First I loved being with you. Second we broke up because I had to move to Texas to help with my grandmother." Abbie raised her brow, "The problem with you is, you don't know how to make the first move." She smirked.
"I do too."
"Please, you might dominate the ice and have so much confidence in front of the press. But off the ice you are completely different." Abbie played with Alex's hair.
Alex wasn't going to admit out loud that Abbie was right. "I don't know what to do."
"Alex, Do you think she is right for you?" Alex nodded, "And she clearly likes you. Then go for it. What's the worst that could happen?" Alex's biggest fear was to be rejected by Olivia. What was so wrong with her compared to the other girls Olivia has bedded. She looked over to Olivia as some random girl handed her a drink. Olivia quickly placed the drink beside her and they watched Olivia retreat to Alex's room. "You see that, she's not interested." Abbie saw the same action, "Go get her."
Alex knew Abbie was right. They had an earth shattering connection. "Okay. I can do this." Alex followed Olivia into her room. She heard Olivia being in the bathroom. Alex locked the door for no one to interrupt them. She opened her door to her personal balcony.
Olivia exited her friend's bathroom, and noticed the blonde leaning on the railing of the balcony. Alex's legs were endless, her golden locks were beautiful. She was like a magnet to Alex, she could always feel the pull to be near Alex. "Hey." She softly greeted. She stood next to the blonde.
Alex calmly responded, "Hey." She acted as if she was happy that her plan worked. She liked being able to hear Olivia's voice without the music drowning sounds out. "Are you enjoying the party?" She was avoiding eye contact.
"Yeah, you have very interesting friends." She observed the way everyone was just having fun. "And I thought you said Trevor was straight. He doesn't look very straight with Nick is it?"
Alex scoffed, "It's not my business to tell."
Olivia looked at Alex who was looking up at the sky. She rested her back against the railing. Olivia looked up at the sky with Alex, "You know I've lived in New York my entire life and I have seen the sky and the city look so beautiful." Olivia observed.
Alex's eyes found on the bottom of Olivia's shirt where skin was peaking out. "It's nice to come out here after a long day to be able to clear your head with a beautiful view." Alex's mouth watered as her eyes trailed up Olivia's body. The fitted tee hung so perfectly on Olivia's bra. She zoned on Olivia's lips.
"Did you feel good about your show? You looked amazing out there."
Alex smiled as she tucked her hair behind her ear, "You think? What was your favorite part?" She bit her bottom lip.
Olivia fixed the strands of hair Alex missed. "You were my favorite part to watch. The whole skate."
Alex's heart was racing, knowing everything was feeling perfect. "Come to Skate America with me." She slowly covered her body on Olivia's and held her hands.
Olivia's nose flared as she was losing her ability to breath, "Don't you want your mom or Trevor with you? Have your normal support system to be there."
Their lips were pulling together. "You're the only support I want there in the crowd." They were both heavily breathing in each other's mouths. Olivia bit her bottom lip trying to fight temptation. "It's okay." Alex's lips quivered out.
Olivia pulled Alex's neck in as their tongues gently entered each other's mouths. Alex's fingers played with Olivia's soft hair. Olivia needed more of Alex as she wrapped her arms Alex's body to pull her in tighter. Olivia was hungry for more of Alex's taste as she deepened the kiss.
Alex pulled on Olivia's belt loops. She walked them inside towards her bed. Olivia untucked Alex's shirt as both. Alex broke the kiss as she watched her hands unbuckled Olivia's belt. Olivia kissed the top of Alex's head. Alex sat down on her bed. She pushed the white tee up as she kissed Olivia's stomach. As she unbuttoned her shirt.
She sat back as she locked eyes with Olivia. She gave an innocent smile as she continued to unbutton her shirt. Olivia watched Alex pull off her own shirt. She was sitting under Olivia with nothing to hide, giving Olivia her most regretted thing she thought about herself.
Olivia stared at the pale beauty. Her eyes left the blue eyes as she looked past the red laced bra. Olivia looked down to see the scars on Alex's stomach. Scars that Alex did at her lowest mental point, after losing Abbie and Nationals. Olivia really cared for Alex but she would never want to cause Alex to return to that moment in her life. She valued Alex too much. She didn't want to have a temptation to cheat on Alex with someone else. She didn't want to hurt Alex ever.
Olivia didn't want Alex to be a one night stand. She didn't want Alex to turn into the same pattern of everyone she cared about to another person to leave her in the dark.
Olivia's emotions and thoughts were everywhere. Her eyes began to water not knowing what to do. Alex's eyes mirrored Olivia's as she saw Olivia standing there frozen. Olivia's eyes frozen to her scars that she's never seen knowing it's too much for people to handle.
"I…" Olivia knew the best way to protect both of them. "I'm sorry we can't do this." Olivia panted out and fought her tears. Olivia quickly exited Alex's room.
Alex's heart shattered as she heard the door shut. Tears ran down her face not knowing what exactly happened. She quickly put her shirt back on. She wiped her tears away.
Olivia left the party. She was feeling out of control and not knowing how to feel grounded. She hopped on a train, she needed to clear her head. She didn't know what she was doing anymore. She didn't want to go to Amanda about Alex problems even though she got Amanda's approval she didn't want her to feel weird. Rafael was off with Sonny at the party she just left.
Olivia walked up a set of stairs to knock on a door. The door didn't open up fast enough. She began to ring the doorbell. The door finally opened, "Olivia?" Kathy questioned standing in her bathrobe, "What… What are you doing here?"
"I'm here to see you." Olivia walked into the blondes townhome in queens. "I need a drink you want a drink?" She walked into Kathy's kitchen. She knew where everything was after being at this place plenty of times. She grabbed the bottle of vodka on the fridge.
"Olivia what are you doing?"
Olivia poured two shots, "Well alcohol is supposed to be this magic drink that makes you feel better right?" She threw back the shot. Olivia always hated the burning sensation.
"But you don't drink, what happened?" Kathy stepped closer to her ex who was clearly in trouble.
Olivia poured another shot and tried to hand Kathy the shot she poured for her. Kathy declined the shot, Olivia shrugged her shoulders by taking both of them, "We were good together right?" Olivia asked the blonde.
Kathy caressed Olivia's cheek, "You were the love of my life. You had a way to make me feel completely safe even when you never opened up to me." Kathy took the bottle of vodka out of Olivia's hands.
"I'm sorry, I never gave myself to you." Olivia thinks that's what she might be doing with Alex.
"Shhh," Kathy pulled Olivia in for a hug, "You tried you just always had something to pull you back. You talked about a future and kids with me, but you couldn't tell me you love me." Kathy confessed looking into the painful brown eyes.
"I did," She still couldn't tell Kathy that she loved her even when their relationship was over. Olivia untied the bathrobe. "You're still sleeping, just your underwear?" She smirked looking at the naked body. She bit her lip as she brushed the back of her finger against her torso.
Kathy could alway melt. "Olivia… I have to tell you something." She whispered as her nose flared.
Olivia watched goosebumps form on Kathy's body. Her hand caressed her up Kathy's body as watched her nipples become hard. Her hand gently massaged one of her breasts. "Yeah, what is it?" She looked at the wrong blue eyes she wanted to be with.
Kathy closed her eyes, "Later." She pulled Olivia in for a kiss.
Olivia quickly dropped her hand in between Kathy's legs. She pushed off the underwear, before thrusted her fingers into Kathy. Kathy cried out as Olivia rapidly rocked Kathy's body against the counter. Kathy tried to undo Olivia's pants. Olivia didn't want Kathy to touch her. She wanted to escape the reality of turning the one person she could say I love you down. She wrapped Kathy's arms around her neck. Olivia sat Kathy on the counter as she deeply curled her fingers in Kathy. Olivia released the kiss as she kissed down Kathy's body. Olivia began to suck on one of Kathy's nipples.
"Liv," Kathy squeaked out.
Olivia could feel Kathy's walls throbbing. She returned for another kiss "Cum for me." Olivia demanded between kisses. Her thumb rubbed against Kathy's clit to push her over the edge.
"Olivia," She gasped out. "I… I…" Her legs tightened around Olivia. "I'm pregnant." She cried out as she trembled in Olivia's arms.
Olivia stepped out of the embrace as her world continued to crumble, "What?"
Kathy put her robe back on, "I'm pregnant and I'm getting married."
"Are you kidding me? Why?" Olivia started pacing back and forth.
Kathy slid off the counter, "You can't get mad at me for this. We're not a couple." Kathy snapped.
"That's because you are a coward." Olivia quickly shot. "Maybe if you could come out to your family."
"What? I came out, would we still be together?" Kathy rolled her eyes at Olivia. "Who are you kidding? You don't settle down. I was never going to be the one because you never want just one." Kathy explained Olivia's personality.
"You don't know that." Olivia stopped pacing and looked at Kathy.
"I do, I literally had sex with you even though I knew you were seeing Dana for two weeks. We broke up immediately that same night and had a three-way. You might think you can do this whole monogamy thing. That will never be you." Kathy softly described Olivia Benson.
Olivia closed her eyes thinking about Alex, knowing Kathy was completely right. She knew that this is why she couldn't be with Alex to protect Alex. She looked backed at Kathy, "And you are lying to yourself and to the world. This whole act of being a straight woman, married to a man, and with kids. You're the one who isn't going to be happy."
"We can't see each other anymore." Kathy softly expressed her feelings Kathy tried to hold Olivia's hand.
Olivia pulled her hand away, "Great," Olivia needed to snap at someone from walking out on Alex. Serena and Kathy throw her out of their lives within weeks apart. "The next time he can't get you to cum. Don't come to me, I'm done servicing your orgasms. Have a good life." She gave Kathy dagger eyes projecting her frustration on someone. She took her bottle of vodka before storming out of Kathy's place.
Don't hate me too much. I hope you enjoy though
