Olivia walked out on Alex's balcony. She saw Alex sitting down at the ledge. Olivia handed Alex a cup of tea. She gave Olivia a half smile, "Thanks."

"I have a lasagna in the oven." Olivia sat down behind Alex.

"Thanks but I'm not really hungry." Alex rejected the offer of food with her stomach in knots.

"Babe you haven't eaten much in days." Olivia was becoming more and more concerned about Alex's mental state.

"I know." Alex sighed out, aware of what was going on. "My stomach just… I'm not hungry." She couldn't explain the feelings she was having.

"Aren't you cold?" Olivia asked, seeing Alex sitting in jeans and a shirt in the nippy November night air.

"I live at the rink, this feels amazing." Alex smiled knowing this is the perfect weather for her. She leaned into Olivia's arms.

"Wanna talk?" Olivia was trying to figure out how to get Alex to open up to her. "I'm all yours in my arms. Under the beautiful night sky with the New York skyline."

Alex felt good in Olivia's arms and her voice in her ear. "How come you have never told me you've never skated."

Not the response Olivia was hoping for. "You've never asked." Olivia caressed Alex's hair.

"How do you know so much about skating, if you've never skated?" Alex took a sip of the tea.

Olivia thought about the times she was a little girl, "It was the one thing my mother and I would watch together. I was always so impressed with the skaters, and I was always so mesmerized by all the skaters."

"So why didn't you start skating?"

"My mother wouldn't let me. She didn't want to pay for it. She didn't want to take me. So I just enjoyed watching you guys on tv."

"But you should have told me. I could help you."

"I'm going to tell you that I don't know how to skate when you are doing quad Salchows. And I can't even do a bunny hop." Olivia laughed. "Also anytime we are at that rink I'm watching you skate we don't have time for me."

Alex scoffed as she shifted her body to look towards Olivia. "I'm not that selfish."

Olivia played with Alex's hair. "I didn't say you were. You pay a lot of money to have that private ice, and having private time with Donnelly. Not to skate with the others. I'm not taking that time away from you."

"But now I need to teach you. Who better to teach you to do something than your reigning National Champion." She smirked knowing she was good at her sport. She moved in closer to Olivia, "Maybe help me start moving into coaching."

"So you're going to coach?"

"I need to think of my options for later in life."

"You know you can't kiss your students."

"But" Alex bit her lip. "I can kiss my first student." She leaned in closer.

"Oh no, I'm sorry we are strictly professional." Olivia smiled at the conversation.

"I don't think you can afford me then."

"I've got forty dollars in my pocket. Will that cover it?"

"Since you're my first I'll give you a discount." Alex chuckled. She stuck her hand out.

Olivia looked at Alex's hand, "I have seven pockets on today. You are going to have to find it."

Alex cocked her brow. As her hand immediately went to her front pants pockets. Her hand traveled to the back of Olivia and into both of her back pockets. "Four down and three to go." Alex smiled. She stood up.

"Have you given up? That's not in your nature." Olivia question.

Alex took Olivia's hands, "Oh no, it's too cold for you out here and Casey is almost home soo." She pulled Olivia up to kiss her. She walked them into her bedroom. Alex put her hands in Olivia's hoodie's empty pockets. Alex quickly ripped off the hoodie. "Lesson one. You need to learn how to fall."

"I haven't paid you yet." Olivia locked eyes with her favorite pair of blue eyes.

Alex pushed Olivia down on the bed. She cupped Olivia's breasts to claim her prize inside Olivia's chest pocket. "This is more than forty." Alex counted the dollars.

Olivia sat up, and pulled Alex closer, "Call it a tip." Olivia unbuckled Alex's belt and opened her pants. Olivia slid her hand down Alex's pants.

Alex sank into Olivia's hand, as she straddled Olivia's knee. She began to kiss Olivia. "Tell me you love me." Alex uttered.

"I love you so much."

"Even if this all went away?" Alex panted out as she couldn't keep her mind on the activities on hand.

Olivia slowly retrieved her hand back to look at the glassy blue eyes. "I would love you even if you were a simple girl going to college trying to figure yourself out." Olivia stated.

"Are you sure?" Tears fell down her cheeks.

"Alex." Olivia sighed out. "What is going on in your you please let me in."

Alex huffed out as she sat besides Olivia. "I don't know how to explain it." Alex calmly confessed. She also heard her mother continue to say not to externalize her problems.

Olivia took Alex's hand. "Can you try?"

"Ever since Skate America and my ankle, I have had this weight on my chest, and I can't breathe." Alex confessed.

"It's okay to be stressed." Olivia pulled her in closer.

"No it's not." Alex scoffed, "I have everything. I don't need to but stressed over a stupid ankle. There are people who would love to be where I am at…"

"Babe, this is your life. You have the pressure of America on your shoulders. You're hiding an injury. How can you not be stressed?" Olivia explained what she's been seeing since Olivia's been going to the rink.

"Because I will get better and this will be me exaggerating."

"Your feelings are valid." Olivia explained. Alex shrugged her shoulders. Olivia pulled Alex in for a hug. "What do you want to do?"

"Want... I don't know."

"You need to get these emotions don't you go back to therapy." Olivia quietly asked.

"Maybe…" Alex stated.

Olivia laid them down. "What helped you through your depression last time?" Olivia asked, trying to help.

"Trevor and Liz helped but Skating. Being by myself on the ice." Alex explained. Olivia chuckled at Alex's comment. "What?"

"I just think it's funny that the one thing that causes all this stress. Is the one thing that helps you?" Olivia observed something similar to her relationship with her mother.

"I need it." Alex confessed. "I need to be in that cold rink, listening to my blades cut the ice relaxes me. Especially during winter there is a pond under my grandparents place. To skate by myself under the trees, in the snow, it's so peaceful." Alex explained her need for figure skating. "And now I can't even do that."

"You will get back on the ice. You just need patience." Olivia explained. She kissed Alex's head.

Alex rested on Olivia's chest, listening to her heart beat. "I appreciate you helping though." Alex's eyes slowly closed.


Alex stepped on to the national ice for her long program. She was twenty points ahead of everyone with the short program. This was no surprise her short programs are always a crowd pleaser and easy to have her hardest combinations. She stood in front of everyone expecting her to place. Expecting that four years ago was a fluke or are they expecting that She doesn't have what it takes to go to the Olympics. They also know the chances for her to go at the age of twenty five is highly unlikely. This long program will decide the rest of her career.

Romeo and Juliet began to play. Alex was confused that it wasn't this year's music selection. She looked down to see her wearing her old costume. She was going to prove herself to her and others with her original piece that should have gotten her to the Olympics. She began to skate to her old routine that she still knows by heart. She turned her triples into quads. Her two double Axels were turned into triple Axels. She was doing excellent until her last jumping pass. She did her quad Salchow both arms over the head leaned forward on the landing to finish out her combination with a one arm triple lutz. She fumbled her landing sliding across the ice slamming her knee against the wall.

She stood up to see the media talking to her. "How does it feel to be a four time national champion but you don't know if you are on the Olympic team?"

Alex smiled, "Well once I get my knee checked out but I am more than qualified to go. So hopefully I will be cleared and I will make it to the Olympic ice."

"Will you consider retiring if you don't make the team? Do you think you have a real chance of even making it in four years if you don't make it this year?" the reporter asked.

Alex cleared her throat. She felt like she couldn't breathe with that question. "I don't have any plans on retiring soon. I still have a lot to do with the sport. And nothing will hold me back from going to worlds."

"Do you consider yourself a failure being a top skater but have a hard time making it to the Olympics?"

"Well…" No one has ever asked her such a question. "I think this interview is over." She walked away.

Alex walked up to Olivia's bar through the loud music, "Hey, Rafael where's Liv?"

"Hey Alex, congrats on your win. She's over there." He pointed to Olivia on the dance floor with Kathy.

Alex walked over to Olivia standing with her ex. "Hey I missed you at nationals." Alex touched Olivia's arm, the music stopped playing and the lights turned on. Olivia turned with a baby in her hands, "What's going on?"

"Yeah I didn't watch your performance." Olivia scoffed as she was watching the baby.

"I thought you said you and Barba were going to watch it?" Alex asked.

"Yeah, Unfortunately Kathy had our baby." Olivia smiled.

"But we haven't talked about having kids, I have to focus on my career."

"No, not your child, mine and Kathy's child. What's there to focus on it's not like you have a career anymore. Your foot has taken that away and you have no job prospects or a degree." Olivia looked at Alex.

"What are you saying?" Alex felt worse about Olivia breaking up with her than the doctor telling her to take six weeks off of skating.

"I'm not going to spend the rest of my life has-been loser." She leaned in closer to Kathy for a kiss.

"Alex… Alex… Alex…." Olivia repeated.


Alex jumped out of her sleep in bed. "Olivia." Alex panted out of breath. "Why are you here?"

"Because we fell asleep together." Olivia tried to dry the tears down her face. "What happened?" Alex held her chest as she was hyperventilating. "Take a deep breath." Olivia caressed Alex's cheek, "Look at me." Alex slowly looked into Olivia's brown eyes. "What just happened."

Alex shook her head, "Nothing." Alex sighed out. "Hold me. Please."

Olivia pulled Alex in for a hug. She was concerned about Alex's mental and physical state.


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