CHAPTER THREE
"So. Palpatine. Emperor Palpatine. The undead Sith Lord. Evilest guy in the galaxy. He's your grandpa?"
Finn's question breaks the long, stunned silence that has fallen over Rey, Poe, and himself. Rey is just grateful that somebody has finally said something.
"Yes," Rey sighs. "I know. It sounds ridiculous."
"You're right about that," Poe scoffs.
"It's a lot to take in."
"Right again, that's twice in a row."
"Does anyone else know about this?" Finn whispers.
"Luke knew. So did Leia. Ben found out just a little before I did."
"Well that explains why he was so desperate to get to you. Of course he'd want a Palpatine on his side."
"Don't do that," Rey snaps. "It's an insult to him and to me."
"Sorry," Finn mutters. "I didn't mean—"
"I wasn't expecting any of this to be easy, but in all the time we've known each other, I've never given you a reason not to trust me."
"Well you do have a history of running off on your own, charging into dangerous waters— sorry, not helping," Poe cuts himself off at the look on Finn's face.
Rey had thought that saying the whole story out loud to some one else would make it feel more real, but it's still just as bizarre as when it was happening. Perhaps even stranger.
She's spent so long taking things as they come, addressing every challenge like it was it's own separate piece of a whole, that stringing it all together feels wrong. As if she couldn't possibly be the same person that all of these things have happened to. And in a way she's not. She's not the scavenger on Jakku anymore, or the apprentice on Ahch-To, or even the fighter on Kef-Bir who was trying so desperately to deny everything she knew to be true. Everywhere she's gone, everything she's done has changed her. Sometimes in obvious ways, sometimes in subtler ways. But they've been changes nonetheless.
She's tired. Her head is spinning. All of the adrenaline that had been keeping her functioning is rapidly fading away. Even sitting up straight feels like a massive effort.
Right now she feels less like all the Jedi and more like a roasted porg.
"Where is everyone else?" she asks, mostly just to stop Poe and Finn from asking any more questions.
"Rose is trying to restore the rest of Threepio's memory. Maz is helping with triage. And Chewie's…" Finn looks in the direction Rey saw Chewbacca earlier, but he's not there anymore. "I thought he was—"
A very distinctive roar cuts Finn off. All three of them whip their heads in the direction of the noise and Rey's heart stops at what she sees.
Chewbacca is standing at the side of the X-Wing, in what is clearly a fit of rage. From this far away, she can't quite see Ben, but surely he's aware of Chewie's presence. And Chewie is aware of his.
The ruckus has drawn the attention of several other people, though no one is daring to get too close. That's good at least. That means she has a chance to get to them.
Rey pushes herself off the bench, ignoring the shaking in her arms.
"Rey, wait," Finn says, as she uses his shoulder to stabilize herself.
"You know she won't," Poe sighs.
She doesn't waste time arguing with them, partly because she knows they won't change her mind and partly because she knows they'll follow her anyway. And she's right.
She pushes through the crowd as politely as possible, walking as quickly as she can without breaking into a full run. Finn and Poe are close behind, flanking her on either side.
They're not far. Chewie hasn't calmed down at all, but at least he hasn't stormed into the jet and ripped Ben apart. Yet.
Good sense would tell her to stay far away from an enraged Wookie, but she seems to have run out of any of that for the day.
"Chewie!" she shouts, knowing she's still too far away for him to hear her over his own yells.
Just a few more paces, a few more seconds and she should be able to—
Chewbacca wrenches the door of the X-Wing open and Rey stops dead in her tracks. If he decides to kill Ben, he will be too fast for her to stop him. She could try to use the Force to throw him off, but she's not sure she's in control enough to do it without hurting anyone. And based off Ben's physical and mental state, she doubts he'd even put up a fight.
She feels a hand on her shoulder — Finn's no doubt — but she keeps her eyes fixed on the jet.
Everything happens in slow motion. Chewbacca leans over the seat, his massive size nearly shielding Ben from view. Ben puts his hands out, and from this distance she can't be sure, but it seems like he says something. Chewbacca doesn't move. Neither does Ben. And then, slowly, Chewie drops his arms. He makes a noise, but it doesn't contain the anger it did before.
Rey feels her legs moving before she's even consciously aware she's walking. She's become disturbingly used to her mind and body feeling disconnected from one another today.
The crowd parts more easily for her now. She can hear the murmurs. At least some people are sure to have recognized the large, dark-haired man sitting amongst them.
She makes it to the X-Wing just in time to catch what sounds like the end of a conversation.
"I know," Ben whispers. "I know. And you can't imagine how badly I wish I could take it back."
Chewie growls. He's reminding Ben of the time he almost killed him.
"Part of me wishes you had. The world would be a much brighter place today."
"The world is brighter today because of you," Rey cuts in. She can feel the regret and the shame and the heartbreak rolling off of him in waves. She can sense his thoughts and she doesn't like where they're headed.
Chewie whirls around to face Rey. He points at Ben, then cocks his head. A question.
"It's okay," she says. "Whatever he's told you is the truth. He's on our side now."
Ben pulls himself out of the seat and gingerly climbs out of the jet, wincing the whole time. Chewbacca moves at the sound, creating a barrier between Ben and the others.
"I'm willing to do whatever it takes to prove myself. And to make up for what I've done in whatever small way I can. Please," his voice breaks, "please just look at me."
Chewie locks eyes with Rey and she nods in what she hopes is an encouraging manner.
Finally, he turns around. Rey moves from behind Chewbacca, nerves on end, ready to interfere if need be. But her caution is unnecessary.
Ben is using one hand to steady himself against the side of the jet. With the other hand, he carefully, slowly reaches out until he's finally just barely touching Chewie's arm. She watches as the two of them lock eyes. She doesn't breathe. She doesn't think she could breathe even if she wanted to right now.
"It's me," he whispers, his eyes deep and dark and sad, young and weathered, hopeful and broken. "It's Ben."
Even the air feels still. There's no longer the slightest hint of a breeze. If she'd thought time was moving slowly before, it was nothing compared to this.
Time practically stops. Then Chewie makes a quiet, indecipherable noise. And then a small sad smile plays on the corners of Ben's mouth. Everything moves very slowly until it suddenly moves very fast.
Chewbacca pulls Ben into a hug. If she couldn't see the way Ben's hands were clutching onto Chewie and the slight shuddering of his shoulders, she might think he was being smothered to death.
It's easy to forget that Ben knew Chewie as a little boy, that their history goes back so much farther than hers does with either of them. But it's clear as day right now. Making Ben look small is not an easy task, but he looks like a child again in the giant Wookiee's arms.
The moment feels too intimate to observe so closely. A family reunion no one was meant to see.
Rey steps back, filling the space between Finn and Poe.
"If you think this is enough to make me like him, it's not," Poe mutters.
"There's two of us that you trust, that trust him. That must at least be enough to make you hate him a little less," Rey looks up at Poe.
His face is set in a hard frown, as if he's struggling to solve a difficult equation.
"I told him I'd help give him a chance," she continues, "Please give him that. If not for him, for me and Chewie."
Poe opens his mouth, then closes it. He shuts his eyes and takes a deep breath.
After spending most of the past day in perfect mental sync with Ben, it's so difficult for her to not know what people are thinking.
"You can see how this would be hard," Finn interjects, when Poe has opened and closed his mouth another two times, apparently incapable of finding the right words.
Finally Poe opens his eyes. He looks over at Ben, who's still half-buried in Chewbacca's fur.
"He looks pretty badly injured," Poe sighs. "He shouldn't be putting so much weight on that leg."
Rey feels the start of a smile spread across her face. It's not the open-armed welcome she'd secretly been hoping for, but it is a show of concern. And maybe for now that's enough.
Before she even has a chance to thank Poe, the scene in front of them changes in a slight but significant way.
Ben's leg seems to give out under him. Chewie notices the shift just in time to keep him from banging his head against the side of the X-Wing as he goes down. The Wookiee bends over and scoops Ben up, holding him like an over-sized baby.
If she wasn't fighting back a rush of fear, she might find humor in how ridiculous he looks. But now all she can think about is the possibility that this whole day may have simply been too much. She herself feels like she could easily slip into a coma, and she was in far better shape than he was at the end of things. How many times has each of their life forces been transferred today? How much does he have left? Is that even how it works?
"Ben!" she yells, although she can already feel that he's completely unconscious.
"It's okay, look, Chewie's got him," Finn says, placing another hand on her shoulder.
She focuses on what she can control, which right now, is her breathing. A deep inhale, a long exhale, over and over again until she feels more steady. She ignores the way her own head is swimming and the way her legs seem to be screaming at her to sit down.
Chewie roars softly. He needs to know where to take Ben.
Poe sighs a deep, weary sigh.
"Take him somewhere discreet. The fewer people that see him the better."
Everything seems to tilt. Her deep breathing isn't making Rey feel better anymore. It's suddenly very hard to focus.
"Don't let him die," she gasps out. She's not sure when she grasped onto Finn's arm so tightly, but it seems to be the only thing keeping her upright.
"Make sure he gets good care," Poe says to Chewie. His voice sounds oddly muffled. "Maybe Maz will know what to—"
If Poe keeps talking, Rey doesn't hear it. Her vision blurs, spots of light dance in front of her eyes. She feels herself sink to the ground and she feels Finn pull her back up.
He right next to her ear, calling her name.
"I'm fine," she mutters. It takes the last of her strength do so. "Just need… to lie down…"
She's fairly certain she hears her name one more time before everything goes black.
