The next day I was with Fry in the kitchen, he was nice and very friendly. I like him, he was genuine and when we first met he was real with me, he felt like someone I could trust. Fry told me his real name is Siggy, but mostly everyone calls him Frypan; I liked Siggy, he said he didn't mind if I called him that. He only had one other person to help him out, Joseph, a shy kid who didn't speak much. Siggy told me it wasn't my fault, Joseph never really talked to anyone. Siggy was serious about his kitchen, he himself wasn't the cleanest man alive, but he always had the kitchen in tip top shape. Siggy didn't let me actually cook, just scrub the pans and prep the meat, but I didn't mind, it was a lot better then slicing the meat, I shuddered remembering the other day.
While I was doing mindless work, like scrubbing a plate or pan, my mind kept thinking about my past. Who was I? Where did I come from? What was my name... I always got stuck there, no matter how hard I tried, I couldn't remember. When I got too frustrated I would try to think of something else, but I always drifted back. What is my name? It was day four and I had new idea, nothing came to me, there was no epiphany or sudden clarity. I was still just the Greenie. What if my name never comes... What if I never remember?
Dinner was delicious, it was goat stew, for some reason we had a lot of goat in the ice box. It was delicious and I felt some pride knowing that I had helped create it. I dipped my spoon in my bowl when Jackson sat down across from me.
"Good to see you, Greenie."
"I really hate that," I muttered into my soup.
"What?"
"I said, 'Hey, you're back'." I hid behind my spoon of soup.
He grinned,"Always for you, Greenie," he said while taking his first taste of the soup. "Wow, it's pretty good today."
"Well, thanks," I have another bite.
"Oh... were you in the kitchen today?"
"Uh-huh."
"Well that might explain it," he winked.
I felt my cheeks blush, What is this?! Why am I blushing? "Erm... thanks, Jackson."
"So, how are you adjusting to life here in the Galde."
"It's not so bad," I reply.
"Yeah, it takes some time. I can't even imagine what its like for a... a..." Jackson stopped himself and took another bite of soup.
"A girl?," I finished.
"Yeah a girl."
"Hey, Greenie," Gully says as he passes my table.
"Hi," I reply with my mouth full of soup.
He almost passes us, but backtracks and crouches next to the table. "Uhm... tomorrow, I'm pretty sure, you're training with the Builders."
"Builders? Oh yeah, I don't know," I push the soup away, so I don't take another bite during the conversation. "Why? Are you a builder?"
"I'm the Keeper of the Builders," Gully smiles.
"Okay, cool. So I'll see you tomorrow then."
"Yeah," Gully stands," See you tomorrow," he then walks away.
I turn back to Jackson who is rolling his eyes. "What?," I ask defensively.
"Oh, nothing. Nothing at all," Jackson grins and finishes his soup.
It was hard to sleep that night, my thoughts were driving me insane. Once I did fall asleep, I dreamed of being a faceless person in a crowd, no one could see me, no one cared. I screamed as loud as I could but no one heard. I ran as fast as I could to, looking to find myself in the crowd, but I got lost, people were smothering me, I couldn't breath.
"Greenie."
I jumped out of bed to find Ben standing next to me. "What? Wha-.. why?..."
"Shh, it's time to go," he beckoned me to follow.
Outside the tent, I could barely see, it was still so dark. "What the hell, Ben!?"
"Shhh," he covered my mouth," You'll wake everyone up," he pulled away and kept walking.
"Okay, but that doesn't mean it's okay for you to barge in on me while I'm sleeping! I could have been nak-...," I stopped myself and I saw Ben tense. "I mean, I could have been busy."
Ben took a deep breath," I'm sorry," he turned and faced me," I didn't think of that, but Clint said you were always wearing clothes when he come in for work, so I assumed..."
I wrapped an arm around my waist and raised the other to rest my head on," Okay... okay. Just don't do it again. Why am I even out here?"
"Yes, don't worry. It won't ever, this is the only time, because, you're training with the Runners today," he smiled and opened his arms as if to say 'SURPRISE'.
"Wait? What?"
"You're training with Runners today...," he said again, confused.
"Okay, but why?"
"Well," Ben rubbed his neck," I was told that you were quite fast the other day, no one caught you before you hit the maze." I shuffled my feet, the only reason I was caught was because of you... "So Mihno told Alby we should try and see if you've got it."
"Got what?," I crossed my arms, it was so chilly. I only had on a thin tank top and the jacket Jackson gave me.
"What it takes to be a Runner," Ben smiled.
"So... I'm going into the maze?" I didn't know whether to feel hope or terror. The maze? Zart said no one went into the maze but Runners!
Ben chuckled," Of course not. But we need to see if you have the strength and stamina, to keep up with us from sunup to sun down."
As if his words were the password, the door to the maze opened. I walked slowly beside Ben as we approached, Should I run for it?! No, they'll catch me and bring me back or let me die out there. It's not so awful here, I can wait like everyone else for them to find a way out.
"I know what you're thinking."
I smiled," No you don't."
I heard people coming up behind us, I looked over my shoulder to see the Runners.
"Hey Ben, got her up, huh?"
"Yeah, she is ready to run," Ben smiled. "Greenie, this is Mihno, Hank, and Nick."
I waved to them all," Hi."
The sun was making it was up from the wall, so I could see that Mihno was about the same height as Ben, with black straight hair and slanted eyes. He didn't seem to happy for me to be there, but he greeted me all the same. Hank had mocha skin with think brown curls that he brushed from his face and soft brown eyes. Nick was tall, taller than Ben, with blonde hair and bright blue eyes.
"Are you sure, Ben?," Mihno asked, eyeing me quickly,
"Yeah, I go this. Go check out the lead, they need you," Ben replied.
"Okay...," Mihno seemed unsure. After a second, they all turned and ran into the maze, I watched them in awe and the moved so swiftly and without a word between them.
"Let's go, Greenie," Ben said.
I gritted my teeth from snapping at him. I hate being called Greenie! Ben took off running and I followed him. We didn't talk, luckily for me, we didn't really run either, for the first hour or so, we jogged laps around the Glade. He called it 'the warm up' and then started sprinting. I kept his pace, but not for very long; once we were in the the Deadheads, he started weaving through the trees, cutting off the trail. I tripped and stumbled, but got up quickly to catch up to him. My side began to throb after a few more minutes I called to him to stop.
"Already, Greenie? They said you were fast," Ben panted.
I crouched to the ground," Maybe... it was... adrenaline," I said between struggled breaths. "I... don't think... I should be a runner... anyway."
"Really, why is that?," Ben squatted next to me.
"I... can't run," I said which made him laugh.
Ben sat beside me, "Well if you don't want to be a Runner, I won't make you become one."
"Thanks for your... support," I say, lowering my body to the ground while my side protested.
"You're lucky its me and not Mihno. He would make your ass run this shit all day until they came back at sundown."
"Why is it you and not Mihno," I layed back on the leaves. Their soft pile felt so comfortable, I could have just fallen asleep.
"Big lead. Maybe a way out..."
"Really?!" Maybe I don't have to wait as long as I thought.
"Yeah," Ben nodded. I figured Mihno is more important to the mission, so I stayed behind to train the Greenie," he chuckled.
"God, I really hate that," I murmured and closed my eyes, taking deep breaths.
"Hate what? My laugh?"
My lips curved into a small smile," No... I hate that name. Greenie."
"Why? What's wrong with Greenie?"
"It's just... forget it," I sat up.
"Come one, you have to tell me now!," Ben begged. I was quiet for a second, picking the leaves out that had tangled in my hair. Ben seems nice, like he can keep the secret.
"Well, it just reminds me that I know nothing about myself, you know? I don't even get the simply luxury of having a name. I don't know anything...," I feel a hot stinging in my throat as my eyes fill. I wipe them away before they fall. "It just... it just... I-I... I feel so lost. Like, who am I?" I can't fight the tears back, they start gliding down my cheeks. I try to talk through them." Why did... t-they send... me h-here?," but I didn't last and the sobbing took control of me.
I feel a pressure on my shoulder, it's Ben's hand. I look to his face, he seems unsure if it is the right thing to do, immediately he pulls his hand away, "I'm sorry. I-I... I'm sorry." I just sit there for a few more seconds, crying loudly and wiping the tears. When I finally calm down enough to speak, I thank Ben. He is so perplexed all he can say is,"Huh?"
"Thank you, Ben."
"What did I do?," his eyes are wide.
"You... you treated me like a person," I looked at him," Like I wasn't just a girl." Ben didn't say anything so I continued," You know, you were the first person to shake my hand?"
"Really?"
I sniffled," Yeah. Even though I ran into you and could have hurt you, you were still way more normal to me than these other guys. They all think I have cooties or something," I stifle a laugh and Ben laughed lowly. "And it's so weird, because I don't even know what normal is..."
"None of us do," Ben said, pulling his legs closer to him," We all are just trying to figure it out as we go..."
A swift breeze pushes the leaves all around us and sways the trees, it felt calm.
"What if I never learn my name?," I ask more to myself then to Ben.
"If that happens, then you get to pick your own name. Completely leave the past behind you."
I look over to Ben, but he isn't looking at me. "What if I don't want to leave the past behind me?"
"You're in the wrong place for that."
