I was putting on my shoes when Ben walked past me without a word, Hank right behind him. I watched them leave in silence and Newt must have observed it all.
"Cold shoulder?," he asked.
"Something like that. Ben's been acting weird."
"Weird?," Newt probed.
"I don't know," I shrugged. "Yesterday he told me to stay away from him."
"What?," Newt's voice portrayed his surprise. "Seriously?"
"Yeah," I stood up and stretched. "He just kind of freaked out on me..."
"That's so unlike him...," Newt murmured more to himself than to me.
"It's probably not a big deal," I decided to let it go. "I'm sure he'll calm down."
"Hmmm, yeah," Newt nodded. "Have fun in the kitchen," he wished me a good day before closing his eyes to get more sleep.
I wanted to let it go, I really tired, but all morning it nagged in the back of my head. How is he mad at me? I thought we got over it all? What is his problem all of the sudden? Did I do something to him? I was so involved in my own head I didn't even recognize Newt come up to get his lunch.
"Can you hear me?," he laughed.
"Hm? What?," I snapped back to see him in front of me smiling.
"What are you thinking about?," he asked.
"Nothing," I shook my head and grinned.
"Nothing huh?"
"Yeah, I guess I just kind of zoned out."
"Yet still looking as gorgeous as ever."
I felt the blush rise in my cheeks, and handed another bowl to a Glader.
"See you at dinner?"
"I'll be here," I looked back up in time for Newt to lay a small peck on my cheek. When he pulled away we locked eyes, his swirling caramel pools were endless and mesmerizing. I lifted my hand and brushed away his shaggy bangs," You need a haircut," I told him while keeping our stare.
"I know," he agreed lowly.
My hand slide down the side of his face, landing on his neck, my thumb brushing the edge of his jawline, my eyes darted down to his lips. Newt took that as a signal and leaned forward so our lips could meet. It was soft and sweet, a light pressure connecting us temporarily, that was until Newt pulled me closer to him and now our entire bodies were touching.
"HEY! Hey, not by the food you love sick dogs," Siggy called from the kitchen.
I pulled away with a laugh, now deeply embarrassed of our intimate moment on display for everyone.
"Sorry Siggy," I chuckled and looked towards the Gladers. A few of them were watching, some laughing others had not even noticed.
"Sorry Fry," Newt raised a hand in apology, then lowered his head to mine. "See you at dinner," he almost growled the words. It made that flame inside me ignite and I had to take a second after he left to get a hold of myself and breathe normally.
Siggy looked over to me as we were preparing dinner, I caught him and giggled," What?"
"Well, I was thinking. I keep hearing how much the Glade wants you cookin' again."
"Really?"
"Yeah," he chuckled. "I hear it more than I should... so, it got me thinkin' if you want to cook again?"
"Really?!" I faced Siggy.
"Really," he confirmed with a small smile.
"I would love to!"
"Well then I guess tomorrow morning you can make breakfast."
"Oh thank you, Siggy!," I jumped on him and hugged him tightly. "Thank you!"
I caught him off guard but he steadied himself and wrapped his thick arms around me gently.
"Okay, okay," he smiled and pushed me off him. "Go to the Bloodhouse, see what all we have left, I can help you think of something."
"Yes! Yes, okay!," I sprinted from the kitchen and made my way to the opposite corner.
I couldn't pry the smile from my face, I was practically skipping through the grass when I saw Ben. He was hurrying into the Deadhead, looking over his shoulders and looked like he was talking to himself. He didn't see me as he disappeared into the trees. I stopped and looked back to the Bloodhouse, Winston will still e there. I need to know what is going on with Ben. I broke from my path and jogged to the Deadhead, I had a pretty good idea of where Ben was going. I followed him at a distance as he rushed past the graves and towards my tree, I gave a silent hello to Jackson as I stealthy tracked Ben.
It was just like the other day, Ben was pacing, gripping his hair in frustration, muttering inaudible words to himself. Something has to be wrong, what would have Ben so upset? It has to be why he lashed out at me. I took a second and then stepped out so he could see me.
Ben froze, his eyes were wide and I saw him try to put on a new front.
"Ben..."
"What are you doing here?," he asked with a stiff lip.
"I could ask you the same thing," I walked down the small slop so we were on the same ground.
"I told you to stay away from me," Ben argued.
"Then you shouldn't be here."
"You don't own the Deadhead, as much as you'd like to believe."
"Ben," I was already tired of the back and forth. "Talk to me. What is going on? You blew up on me the other day and I have a right to know why."
"Nothing," he spun away from me.
I sighed," Seriously? Why can't you talk to me?"
"Because it has nothing to do with you."
"Doesn't mean you can't talk to me about it."
"Actually yes it does," Ben sniffled, I could hear his anger fading.
"Ben," I walked around him so we were facing each other. "Tell me."
A tear fell off Ben's face and hit his shirt," I can't tell you."
"Ben," I stepped closer. "I'm here for you, we're shanks, remember?"
Ben wiped his eyes and turned to the tree," I remember when you first got here," he changed the subject.
I looked to my tree, notches now the only design on the bark. "What day am I at now?," I asked because I knew he would know.
"It's 105," he whispered another tear falling.
"Ben," I stood beside him. "I remember when it was my 100 day, you wanted to talk to me about something."
"I... I can't," he told me. "I'm sorry. I didn't mean to get so angry the other day... I just know that I can't talk to you, or else I'll let it slip. I can't tell you and I'm sorry."
"Look, it scares me to see you like this. I don't know what's wrong or how I can help," I laid my hand on his shoulder to offer support.
"You can't help," Ben reached out and touched one of the marks on the tree.
"You almost sound like me," I made the joke hopefully to see him laugh but it had no effect on him. "I always say there is no one to help... but the truth is that when I talk about it, it does help. Ben?"
He finally faced me on his own," I can't tell you, please just stop asking."
What could be so bad? Did he kill someone? Did he get into a fight?
I crossed my arms," Well, I guess I'll just have to figure it out on my own."
"What?," Ben sounded tired. "No, just let it go."
"It can't be about the Griever attack, that was too long ago and you weren't really close to either Joe or Tucker. I don't think this is Nick, you always talked to me about him. Nothing new is really happening in the Glade, well, except Hank practicing his singing every night."
"Just stop," Ben begged.
"Unless it's... it's me?"
"What? No, it's not you," Ben shook his head.
Me and Newt? Would Ben be upset about this? He would talk to me about it i it did though, right?
"So it's not me, not the attack, not Hanks' singing. Is it Mihno?" Ben's eyes flickered, giving me a hint I was on the right track. "So Mihno?"
"What? I didn't say that, no, it's not Mihno. Look, I came here to be alone, so please just go," he turned away from me again, putting distance between us.
"I'm not leaving until I figure it out. So Mihno is clue, did something happening while you guys were running? A fight?"
Ben's anger was coming back," What part of I can't talk bout do you not understand! Just leave it alone!"
"Tell me!," I demanded.
"No!"
"TELL ME!"
"I CAN'T! I CAN'T TELL YOU! I CAN'T TELL ANYONE!"
"Tell anyone what?!
"THAT IT'S OVER!," Ben exploded, his face flushed and his eyes wide.
"What's over?," I asked calmly.
Ben laughed manically and ran his fingers through his hair, now again pacing the space between us.
"It's over, it's all just over."
"Ben, what's over?"
"You wanted to know and now you know. You know, but you shouldn't know... but I told you," Ben rambled to himself
"Ben," I reached out and grabbed his arm so he couldn't walk away again. "Tell me," I demanded. Ben froze and looked down at my hand gripping his shirt, he went unearthly still, silence ringing in the trees, choking me of the air around us. Ben crumbled onto the ground, I tried to catch him but it only knocked me onto the ground too. He was half lying on top on me, his body now shaky as he sobbed.
"Ben?," I sat up and he pulled away from me so I couldn't see his face. "Ben? Talk to me. You're scaring me. What's over? What does that mean?"
"It's over," he cried. "We're all over."
"What does that mean, Ben," I crawled to him. "Do I need to get Clint?"
Ben's hands slid down his face, it was red and streaked with tears. His eyes were puffy and his hands were shaking but he wouldn't look at me. He sucked in a low breath," There's nothing else," he paused. "The maze. We've ran the whole thing, it's empty. There's no way out," he wrung his hands on his shirt. "It's over."
The maze is empty? That can't be true.
"Ben, it's not empty. It just changes," I leaned against the tree trunk.
"No, we've kept track of all the changes. What days, which walls, where they go and how they all end up nowhere. We've ran the whole thing," he kept his eyes on the ground. "There's no way out."
"Ben, that can't be right," I felt a panic slowly creeping into my blood.
"It is," he wiped his nose. "The map is done, we finished it, but it doesn't tell us where to go. We weren't supposed to tell anyone! Oh shuck... I can't believe I told you."
"Ben... are you serious? The maze is empty?"
Ben slowly lifted his face, his red rimmed eyes resting on me," It's true."
The panic then flooded, my heart started to race and the world looked fuzzy. I reached out and steadied the spinning of my vision with the soft grass below me.
"And I promised to get you out... I promised to get everyone out of here and now I can't."
"But... But you told me... you were close?," I spoke between ragged breaths.
"I thought we were," he started to cry again. " I thought it was the way out. It was the last option we had and now it's gone and we're done and it's just over!"
No way out? Maze is empty... that cant be true. It can't be real. This isn't real.
"No, it can't be right," I denied it. "You must be missing something."
"No, the map room shows it all. There's nowhere else we haven't been."
"Ben, you guys must have missed something."
He shook his head," No. We've double and triple checked."
Empty... no way out... trapped.
"When...," I sucked in a breath. "So Alby knows?"
Ben nodded," And all the Runners."
"When is he going to tell the Glade?"
"What?," Ben sat up straight. "No, no! We aren't telling anyone. I wasn't even supposed to tell you. I can't believe I told you! I'll be banished for it!"
"Wait, you're not going to tell the Glade?"
"No, no one can know! No one... and know you know. Oh no! Oh no!," Ben started to rock back and forth.
"You're going to hide it from everyone! Are you jacked!?," I jumped up.
Ben stood up too," No, listen, no one can know about this. No one!"
"People need to know. No, I have to tell Newt! I... I can't believe you've known for 5 days and not told anyone!"
Ben shuffled his feet and sucked in a breath, not looking me in the eyes," We've... we've known for a while."
"What?"
"Remember that day we had a 'Runner meeting'?"
I thought back to the day Ben and I had been in the Deadhead and he escaped for a meeting with Mihno. I thought it was good news, like they had found the exit... but it had been the opposite.
"YOU'VE KNOWN ALL THIS TIME!," I erupted with rage
"It's complicated, Alby doesn't want the Glade to know! You don't think this hasn't been eating away at me!? It kills me that I know this. I shouldn't have told you! See, this is why!?"
"Well, I'm telling Newt! I don't care what Alby wants."
Ben grabbed my wrist," Wait.. wait, just please."
"No," I ripped my arm from his grasp and stormed for the Homestead.
"Newt already knows," Ben called after me.
I stopped, my breath caught and my heart froze. Newt knows? He can't, he would've told me. No! It's not true. I started to run to through the trees as they clawed at me with their branches as if to try and stop me. I push past their desperate claws and into the Homestead, Gladers are starting to walk towards the kitchen, the sun was starting to set and that meant Dinner. I ran through them, weaving past their bodies in a hurry, not even aware enough to apologize for bumping into them. I scanned the tables viciously, no sign of Newt, but Siggy saw me.
"Winston sure can talk, can he?," Siggy's voice was muffled to me. "Did he say anything about pork?"
Newt. Where could he be? My eyes dashed to the Garden and I started to run again towards the green corner of the Glade. It's possible Siggy called out after me, but I wasn't focused on him. It's not true. It's not true I told myself as I skidded to a stop before the rows of fruit. Barren, no one was in the Garden, where is he? Where could he be?
I looked frantically over my shoulder to survey the Glade, hoping Newt would be right behind me. I looked at the a large plain of grass before the opening of the maze doors, beyond it was the Bloodhouse and to the right was the kitchen, now filled with Gladers laughing. I looked to the Tower, there were people on top, it was famously known for being where Alby liked to spend his time. I ran towards it, but on top was Alby and Jeff, Newt wasn't there.
"Good night, Greenbean?," Alby called but I ignored him and bolted back to the kitchen.
Scanning the tables of Gladers, none noticed me, all too busy enjoying their dismal days.
"Greenie? What are you doing? Get the table up," Siggy called to me.
He's not here! Where would he be!?, I grunted loudly with frustration. The Homestead was my last chose so I sprinted in that direction, once again disregarding Siggy. If the maze is really empty, then there is no way out. We're stuck here forever. The Greivers will kill us all.
As I was on my way to the Homestead, Newt sprang forward and surprised me. He came out of the Med Hut, a bandage on his right arm.
"Hey beautiful," he grinned.
"Tell me it's a lie," I begged him falling into his chest
His relaxed and content face quickly shifted to concern and he wrapped me up
"Are you okay? What's wrong."
"Tell me it's a lie. Tell me Ben is lying, that it's not true."
"Take a deep breath, I don't know what you're talking about," he guided me away from the main path.
"No! No! Tell me now!"
"Tell you what?," Newt looked scared for me.
"Tell me the maze isn't empty."
Newt's eyes gave him away before he could speak. "What are you talking about?," he looked over his shoulder.
"You knew," I felt my heart shatter. He knew it and didn't tell me. "You knew," I said the words in a sound just below a whisper. I said them for myself, to try and understand it I wanted to comprehend the situation; Newt knew about the maze and he never told me.
Newt's eyes were sad, oceans of sorrow as he searched for what lingered in mine. I didn't know what I was reflecting onto him, probably fear and anger, confusions and terror, but he gave no sign. He didn't even blink as he spoke," I knew."
