A/N

My last update before the holidays. I think this story is more than half finished now. I have where it is going planned out in my mind, I always think it will get to a certain point quicker but lol oh well.

I would love to hear thoughts, ideas etc of what you think, where you want it to go, would like to see etc so I can take on board everything and make any changes for the better to the plot. Not saying I will do everything suggested of course, but getting a different view point is always good.

Thank you all again for reading, happy holidays, I hope they are filled with warmth.

Enjoy.

""""

Sunniva stirred the large pot that hung over the crackling fire within the kitchens. The contents within were a hearty spring broth with lamb and fresh vegetables along with dried herbs, the smell was more than pleasant and normally would have whetted her appetite and left her looking forward to her own meal. But on this day the aroma did not seem to reach her and she stared, unseeing as her trusty long wooden spoon moved the food and prevented it from becoming over cooked in the liquid. Her mind seemed determined to dwell upon her conversation with Aedre many nights past, going over small points until she felt tired of merely thinking of the situation. She felt uneasy and although she tried her best to push such whims to the back of her mind they would give her no rest.

"Sunniva!"

The voice startled her out of her stupor and she started before turning her head to see who addressed her.

"Did you not hear me call you?"

Sunniva stared at the other serving woman for a long moment. "No, my mind must have been elsewhere."

"I asked if you wanted the leftover dough putting into the cloth, I was unsure if you had finished with it for the day."

"Yes, that would be fine. I have already baked the bread for today's meal."

The other woman seemed to study her closely. "You look unwell" she almost accused.

Sunniva let out a small chuckle, but to her own ears it sounded forced and false. "You worry too much, I am just getting old. I can no longer take the day in my stride as I once did in my youth."

The other woman gave a playful sneer. "That would be a first Sunniva, age is still trying to catch up to you, but you outrun it every time." She smiled.

"Mayhap... I'm too weary to run now" Sunniva said, her voice low.

The woman gave Sunniva a rough but reassuring pat upon her back. "Some rest will see your body and mind right. Spring is here and the renewed warmth thaws old bones."

"That may be" Sunniva said, turning back to the pot.

The woman gave her a puzzled look before returning to her own duties.

Once again Sunniva's gaze bore no real attention to the meal before her, her eyes drifted, coming to rest upon the young girl sat a little away from her, nimble marred fingers working deftly upon fruit, the deep purple berry juices staining her hands as she plucked them from their stalks. Sunniva's gaze fixed upon those small hands, those small scarred hands, and her mind wondered just how deeply stained they were. The doubts would not abate and Sunniva had to finally admit that she knew so little of this young woman, her past, where she had come from and the ordeal she had endured to bear such marks of mistreatment. Not for the first time Sunniva couldn't help but wonder just how damaged Aedre was, not just her body, but her mind as well. No matter how much she cared for the girl, could she really condone the death of Guene? Had she been too hasty in compiling a story that would lift all sins from Aedre's shoulders? And the question still lingered - why had she hidden that blood spattered apron? The thought tormented her, if it had been an accident surely Aedre would have come to her, hoping for aid and help... and Gamling, what of what he had said... Guene had been killed in violence with many blows to her head, how could an act of self defence result in such vicious actions? Her mind whirled, Guene had been a spiteful, selfish woman but would she attack another with death upon her mind just for the favour of a man... even if that man was indeed king? It didn't fully make sense and when things didn't make much sense the truth was harder to grasp. She glanced at the young girl again, watched her become aware that eyes were upon her and lift her slim face to meet Sunniva's gaze. A smile curved her lips, simple and honest... innocent perhaps, but the glow from the fire cast wild and eerie shadows of orange and black and the smile somehow became sinister to Sunniva's mind.

But it was just her mind; she knew her dark thoughts had clouded her thinking for a moment. She smiled in return and turned back to her chores. She could imagine the best and worst outcomes all she liked, but it would gain her nothing, she had only one path to the truth she sought and that path led to the king. Pulling the truth from Éomer would be a hard task, and his questioning as to her motives would be uncomfortable, never had she hid anything from him or any of his kin before and glancing once more at the young fragile girl, she wondered if she would stand by that oath, or if her own feelings of protecting that which she held dear would win out.

"""""

Night had come to Edoras and Éomer's work for the day was finished. A few days hence he would be riding out once more and his muscles itched for the fresh air and the gallop of a horse beneath him. But for now he must be content with his warm fire, but he was not content - in fact his mood was foul and he had sat for a long time in silence, his fingers absently brushing through his beard as his thoughts lingered gloomily over what had been said that day.

"I am finished with my work, my lord" Baal said. "I can do no more on this night, I will begin again tomorrow."

Éomer looked over at him and nodded. "That is good."

"My lord..." Baal said, before pausing as if gauging if the rest of the words he would speak were wise. "You have said nothing of what happened today, if you wish to speak of it..."

"Just thinking about it gives me cause for anger" Éomer interrupted.

Baal nodded in understanding. "Yes, but perhaps to speak would lighten the load you bear?"

Éomer couldn't help but feel a tinge of guilt touch him. He had been sat here, warm, wrapped in fur against the slight chill of a spring night, brooding over his hurt pride while the young boy worked tirelessly for his king's cause.

"I am fine" Éomer said, a little too gruffly. "The council were put in their place and I had no choice but to bow to them in return."

"All is not..."

"Lost yet, I know boy. But my mood is ill, I dislike giving them anything they want. Their smug faces give me cause to remove their expressions by force!" He remained serious for a moment before both men chuckled.

"Yes, I can understand why. Their ideas are a little outdated."

"They are like old washer women!" Éomer said, still smiling. "Even now I can see them gossiping over the council meeting today."

Baal laughed, "I bet they are doing just that."

"Hmm" Éomer agreed. "Now, be gone. Surely you have better ways to spend your night than cheering up a foul tempered fool."

Baal grinned, "But he is a king; after all, it is my duty."

Again the two men laughed together before Baal bowed and left him alone. Éomer's spirit seemed a little lighter, laughter often had the effect of chasing away ill humour even if the bearer had intended to hold on to it. He took up a cup and poured himself a drink from a nearby jug before taking a long swig of the liquid and wiping his lips upon the back of his hand. His thoughts slowly drifted back to Aedre, it seemed many days since he had last seen her, yet it had only been a day, had he not seen her doing her chores just the day before? But of course it wasn't the same, he had not talked to her or held her within his arms since that night after the feast, it felt a world away now. He was a proud man, but he was still a man and through the hours since small worries had crept into his mind.

Had he pushed her too soon? Had what they shared been a mistake? Had she not been ready? He knew these thoughts would not be put to rest until he met with her again, yet time seemed to be against him and by the hour he returned to his chamber his only thought was of sleep. He was reluctant to admit that part of him was a little pleased by this in some way. It delayed the answer to his questions, an answer that he was not fully ready to hear if it was not positive.

He went to take another drink but stopped abruptly as a knock sounded upon his chamber door.

"Come" he called, knowing it would be Baal, forgetting some small trinket of his, as was so often the case.

But it was not Baal who entered.

Sunniva closed the door softly behind her, before turning her gaze upon Éomer.

"Sunniva! This is an unexpected surprise" Éomer said, a slight teasing in his voice, but his face became quickly serious as he saw the expression upon the older woman's face, it held an uncertain sorrow to it that told him instantly she was troubled. "Yet I feel you do not come for a visit of pleasure. Come sit, I would know what troubles you and it seems you have an urge to tell me."

Sunniva accepted his offer of a seat and waited for him to sit before she allowed her gaze to meet his.

"Éomer," she began, but hesitated. "I come to talk of Aedre."

"Aedre? Why? What has happened, she is safe?"

"Oh yes, do not fret upon that, all is well."

"Then why do you wear that expression? All is not well" Éomer said, his brow furrowing as he leaned forward in his chair.

"I worry for her Éomer, I care for her, you know this."

Éomer nodded, his face still holding confusion.

"You have kept her past from me for long enough..." She saw him about to interrupt her. "It is no good denying it, I know you wish to protect her too, but I have been with her for many years now, in all those years I have not asked you, I have not harried you, even though I wished to know."

Éomer's expression became suddenly suspicious. "Then what is it now that causes you to ask me this?"

Sunniva faltered, but it was only for a mere moment, too short a time to allow the king to pick up on. "This situation is why I ask. I feel I cannot understand nor protect her with all my strength if certain things are concealed in mist."

Éomer leant back into his chair, his face set in thought as he mulled over her words.

"What you ask is not beyond reason Sunniva, but her past... is not something I would want to speak of, Aedre is Aedre, she became Aedre when she came to Rohan."

Sunniva's expression fell. "Is her past wicked enough to cause you to say this?"

Éomer sighed, he was making the situation worse and he knew it.

"I must know, even if it is as severe as you say."

"Why must you know?" Éomer said, suddenly angry. "You are a good woman Sunniva, your heart is good but what if her past discolours the way you see her? What if it taints her and you no longer feel you can love her?"

Sunniva's eyes widened and in reply she struck a stinging slap to the king's face before shrinking back in immense regret. Éomer touched his burning cheek with his fingertips but did not turn to look at the woman that had dealt the blow. She had not done such a thing since he was a child and for a moment his senses were lost as he was taken back to the time he had been a youth and the guilt he had felt at having been struck for a misdeed.

"I-I" Sunniva stuttered. "Forgive me Éomer King, I did not mean to lay a hand upon you."

Éomer slowly turned to look at her, his mind returning and filling his thoughts not with anger, which he had expected, but surprise and bewilderment.

"You hit me" he said, still disbelieving.

"Forgive me." Sunniva was now upon her knees before him, her hands clutching at his robes.

Éomer let out a chuckle that held no humour. It was a strange and almost unreal situation, none dared strike him unless they too were willing to bear his anger back, no one dared strike a king. His tongue cleaved to the roof of his mouth, suddenly dry and useless. Finally knowing he could not stay seated as the woman sobbed before him he stood and walked towards the fire, his movement shaking off her clutch upon him.

"Éomer?" Sunniva said, her voice despairing.

Éomer stared into the flames, his mind working over just what his next actions or words should be; the situation was cloying and had left a strange feeling within the pit of his stomach. If a man had hit him in such a way he would have instantly known how to react, or a lover he had quarrelled with... these situations were easily put together within his mind, but a woman he respected and who should have respected him, his own mother figure of sorts... he was lost as how to deal with it.

"Éomer?" Her voice, pleading now, once again broke his concentration and a deep furrow appeared upon his brow.

"For pity's sake woman give me a moment!" he snapped, and Sunniva fell silent save for her sniffing. He ran a hand across the wooden mantel, his fingers sensing the warmness of the wood softly heated by the fire below. "I know not what to say or do."

He heard Sunniva rise and walk a few steps towards him, but she stopped a few feet away from where he stood, knowing to come too close would only serve to give more reason for anger and ill feeling.

"Forgive me, I know not what came over me, I should never..." She paused and Éomer heard her give a small gasp, fighting back renewed tears. "I could not bear the words, they ripped at my heart."

At the tone of distress within her voice Éomer glanced over his shoulder at her. The older woman stood wringing her hands, her face etched in a pained expression, his heart softened.

"To say any words would cause my love to wane for those I consider my kin, my loved ones... I could not bear it Éomer, Aedre is as much loved by me as you yourself are, no words, no matter how foul would sway me from those I call family, if only in my heart and not in blood."

Éomer felt his anger ebb away, the words were true and now that he looked back his own words seemed ill chosen and ripe for causing upset. He himself would have lashed out at such words. Had his feelings for Aedre been changed by knowing of her past? No, her past meant so little in the present, Sunniva's will was as steadfast as his own, and he had doubted her. His own blow to her had been far more bitter and hurtful than the physical blow she had dealt him.

"But I should not have struck you, no matter my own feelings..." She paused. "Forgive me Éomer, I know not what I would do if you turned from me."

"You are already forgiven." He gave a weak smile. "I could not hold your courage in defending those you love against you."

Sunniva's eyes filled with tears and she rushed forward, encircling her arms about him in a motherly embrace. "You must not forget that you are also among those I love, my heart aches from causing you pain."

Éomer laughed. "You caused me no pain; the shock caused me to reel, not your hand."

She looked up at him with concerned eyes, her palm patting his cheek softly, it was not red and he did not wince at her touch.

"See," Éomer said, grasping her hand in his own, "you need not worry." He smiled and Sunniva smiled in return. "Let us forget this and return to our seats, I will tell you all which you desire, it was wrong of me to keep these things from you for so long."

''''''''''''''''''

When Sunniva left the king's chambers, the hour was late and the corridors still and quiet. She touched her face distractedly and wondered if it looked as pale as she herself felt, the tale had left her sorrowful and horrified in equal amounts. What she had been expecting the young girl's history to be she was unsure, perhaps an abusive household where her father's fists and outbursts caused her to live a miserable and sorrowful life, or perhaps a woman that had seen the many terrors of war, losing her family and looks to the blade and flame... she had never expected this...

A child of man that had lived with foul creatures since, who knew when, a woman that had caused death and grief through no fault of her own, who had been ravaged by monsters, every single day a struggle to survive, to eat, to not die at the hands of cruel masters... to exist. Sunniva found she could not fully fathom such a life. Her little Aedre had been through so much and was still here, living and breathing. Surely the Valar had a hand in this fate.

She made her way back to the warmth of the kitchens, where a few straggling women rushed to finish their chores. But at the table, sat in patient wait, two bowls placed side by side, sat Aedre. As she saw Sunniva enter she indicated to a bowl with a hand and smile, signalling that she had been waiting for her return before eating. Sunniva smiled and took the seat next to her, picking up her spoon to begin her meal. But her eye was caught as the young girl began to eat. Sunniva's heart tugged, she wished more than ever now to protect her from any further violence and hatred, yet the same thoughts pushed their way into her mind, stronger than before, knowing now that perhaps right and wrong were blurred within Aedre's mind... and Sunniva wondered if the young woman was far beyond the help she could offer her, perhaps she was too damaged to live freely in the world of men.