Midoriya's text couldn't have come at a better time. My dad pulled me out of bed at eight am to sit me down at the breakfast table. He hasn't even poured his coffee before he starts grilling me about Katsuki. He's staring me down, asking why I told my siblings and not him.

Natsuo's gifted him a World's Worst Dad mug every father's day since my mom was sent away. I stare at the way he holds the coffeepot by the glass instead of the handle. I used to think my dad had baseball mitts instead of human palms. "Maybe because I knew you'd react this way?"

My mom's sitting at the other end of the table, not directly beside him, but close enough that I can see they've made some progress from the night before. She's staring at me over her mug of green tea, waiting for it to cool down. She seems comfortable around my dad though. I guess my outing served as some good trauma-bonding.

I can't tell if they're disgusted or disappointed or what the fuck. They seem shaken, and kinda hurt that I hid this from them.

My dad sets his mug down. "And so, who is that young lady you bring home?"

"Momo? She's my friend."

"I thought she was your girlfriend."

"She was," I nod. I remember how relieved we both were when we came out to each other the night of her sweet sixteen. We were supposed to have sex but I couldn't stay hard no matter how hard I tried. We've been good friends ever since. "And now she has a girlfriend."

My phone buzzes against my thigh. I pull it out to escape the conversation.

Wanna finish this blunt?

I text back so fast it's immediately read because Midoriya hasn't left the chat yet. Katsuki replies just a second after me.

"I gotta go," I say, tucking my phone back into my pocket.

"We aren't finished talking about this—"

"My friend's in the hospital." I lie. Or maybe it's not a lie. Who the hell actually knows with Midoriya?

My dad narrows his eyes. "What friend?"

"Midoriya."

My mom covers her mouth as I rise. "Oh my. That's terrible. What happened to him?"

"I don't know." I mutter, slipping my shoes on. "Probably tried to kill himself again."

My dad looks at me like I just told a sick joke instead of the probable truth. My front teeth dig into my bottom lip when I see him pointedly glance at my mother. I know she's sensitive about this kinda stuff. I wasn't trying to be mean, I was just being honest.

I reach for my keys so I have something to do other than feel like the worst kind of shit for triggering my mom.

He frowns at my hand on the doorknob. "Don't be out too late, Shouto." he says, because he knows I'm not coming back home for a while. He'd stopped setting a curfew after I turned eighteen. I think he just doesn't want me sleeping over Katsuki's anymore.

"Fuck off," I say, but only after I shut the door behind me.

I get in my car and speed all the way to Midoriya's neighborhood. I don't understand why Katsuki doesn't just walk. They live close enough anyway. Still, I stop by his house like a good friend.

I don't even have to text him, he's already outside. I blink at him. He scowls back.

"Took you long enough," he scoffs, shutting the door behind him. If I weren't socially demented, I'd take offense to this.

But I know him enough to know this is just his way of saying thanks. So I say, "You're welcome."

Midoriya's house is a four-minute drive but we get there in under two because I'm just as antsy to get high as Katsuki is. We haven't talked about last night. I kinda just left him in the foyer so I could go upstairs and forget I existed.

I think he's still pissed. He doesn't even wait for me to park before he steps out of the car. I meet him outside of Midoriya's front door a few seconds later.

"Hey, guys," Midoriya says, smiling wanly.

Even when he looks like complete shit, Midoriya is still civil enough to maintain appearances. I commend him for that. "Hello."

"You locked out or something?"

"Um." One of his eyes starts to twitch. "No. Just waiting for you, is all."

"So…" I start, wondering if his mom was still upset with us for making the living room smell like a dispensary last month. "Are we sparking up out here or?"

"Oh, hell nah. It's too hot for that—" Katsuki says, already reaching for the door. He pushes at the same time someone pulls and almost stumbles in.

Inside, a burly, six-foot-tall man stands before us. He's built like my dad, but they don't have the same aura. This guy's a different type of chaotic. A contained, sinister anger brewing in him instead of the boiling pot my dad has.

"Why, hello there," he tells Katsuki.

"Uh," Katsuki mumbles, too confused to react. "Hi."

The man looks down at Midoriya. The skin of his face is scarred and sun damaged. It wrinkles unsettlingly when he frowns. "Where'd the girls go?"

Midoriya turns and shoulder checks the man on his way inside. "Home."

Me and Katsuki stare at each other for a moment. The man swallows his lips up in a familiar smile. His large palms upturn as he shrugs, holding the door open for us.

"Teenage boys, right?" he sighs and suddenly it all clicks. This is Midoriya's father. The man I've heard so little about and never seen. I know he's his dad only because of their identical strained smile.

Some part of me wants to remind the man that we're all the same age, but I don't know how to interact with this man. He's so much different than mine and Katsuki's dad. I don't even know his name.

Katsuki shakes his head, walking in before me. "Just him," he says.

The man looks after both of us. My toes curl against my slides as I follow Katsuki mechanically down the hall. There's something strangely predatory about his gaze.

"So, that's him?" Katsuki asks after I shut the bedroom door behind us. "Your old man?"

Midoriya says nothing, but the way he slumps on the wall and down to the floor answers for him. That's how sulky I used to get when my dad used to drop me off at school and people would stare. I want to ask what the deal is, but I hate answering questions about my dad more than anything, so I simply sit beside him and pull my lighter out my pocket.

I flick the flame and watch Midoriya stare into it for a moment. It's the same look Touya would get in his eyes on my birthday, watching the candles drip onto my cake, gaze fixed firmly on the tiny flames.

Midoriya reaches into his own pocket for the joint and lights it. "Thanks," he murmurs around his first hit.

My phone buzzes against my thigh but I ignore it because the blunt's passed to me next. I take my hit and let the smoke fill my lungs all the way down to my diaphragm. I should be ashamed of how much relief this shit gives me. I usually am, but I've had a terrible week, so I don't give a fuck.

It's insane how I can have weeks of nothingness— legit feel like I'm reliving the same day over and over again— and then fifty live-changing events happen back to back. Natsuo bailing Touya out was very brotherly, but I wouldn't consider it a net good. That motherfucker deserves to be behind bars.

I'd also have liked for my mom to come back earlier. Preferably before I became addicted to drugs to cope with her absence but whatever. I'd also have liked to not be outed in front of both my parents like that. Especially not in front of Katsuki.

I felt so bad, I couldn't even look at him. I'm not ashamed of what we did, I'm just embarrassed that my dad's homophobic and made Katsuki feel weird about us.

My mom, my dad, my brother, Katsuki, all these little worries fade into distant thoughts as I exhale. Fuyumi always talks about mindful breathing. I hope this is what she means. I don't realize it's Katsuki's turn until he snatches it out of my hand.

"Pass that shit, already," he snaps.

I think he's just cranky. He'll mellow out after a few hits. We all will.

And we do. Two hits into our blunt rotation, we've all significantly chilled out. I take another appraising glance around the room. It hasn't changed since the first time I've been over on his sixteenth birthday.

Uraraka and Asui went home after we cut the cake, but Iida and I got to sleep over. I remember Midoriya confessing he had a crush on me while Iida was brushing his teeth and not being able to sleep all night. For a whole week.

I ended up inviting myself over again a month later and kissing him after the third shitty superhero movie he made me watch. We ended up making out until the credits rolled and his mom got home.

I stare up at his sun-faded posters as I reminisce. They were more vibrant back then. He was such a bad kisser.

I don't know how much time has passed, but it must've been a while because we hear knocking on the door.

"Izuku? Are you in there?"

It's his dad. The doorknob starts rattling. We're all so used to being home alone at Midoriya's that we never bother locking the door.

"Fuck!"

"Fuck."

"Fuck—"

Midoriya's father opens the door just in time to hear his son say fuck. He doesn't even blink twice at the explicative, he walks inside as if Midoriya just welcomed him in. What the hell is wrong with him? If it was my dad, he'd have pulled me out the room to give me a talking to. Even Katsuki's dad would have given us all a stern glance.

Especially with the compromising position we're in. We're all sitting on the carpet with the window cracked open, using a fucking DVD case as an ashtray. His dad doesn't seem to care though. He walks inside and, after scoping out the merch covering his son's bedroom in distaste, sits himself on the foot of the bed.

It's my turn and I haven't done anything but let the joint burn in my grip. After another moment of poorly concealing his disappointment in Midoriya's interior design, he brings his eyes back to us. Namely, the blunt in my hand.

"May I?" he asks.

It's dead silent as they all stare at me. Katsuki looks like he's trying to see if I have it in me to refuse. Midoriya looks like he'll rip my arm off if I pass it. His father only looks expectant. Impatient even.

I'm fucking pissed. I didn't even get to take my hit, but this isn't my weed or my house, so I just pass it.

The man takes it into his large, dry hands. I know Midoriya's mom is vehemently against her son doing any drugs, but I have no fucking idea what his dad's like. My dad doesn't approve, but he just tells me to smoke outside. Probably trying to get us to bond or something. Katsuki's mom flushes his stash down the toilet.

I wonder how his guy's going to react. For a moment, I really think he's about to ash it on my wrist and stomp the blunt out on the floor.

Midoriya's dad inspects the blunt further, slowly twirling it around his thick fingers before bringing it to his chapped lips. We all watch stiffly as he sucks in a hit. His chest expands like a hot air balloon. I wonder how proportionately big his lungs have to be for his ribcage to be so massive.

His left eye waters slightly while the bottom lid of his right eye twitches. Midoriya's eyes do the same thing sometimes. It's freaky. They even blinkthe same way.

While I don't think his dad's a stoner, I also don't believe this is his first time smoking weed either. He doesn't even cough when he blows out a thin stream of smoke down into our faces.

None of us blink. I'm not really scared, I'm just trying to see what he's going to do.

The man shakes his head slightly and considers the blunt again. "This is some uh, really potent stuff, huh?" he remarks, trying to get chummy with us.

It's Midoriya's turn. I think his dad knows because instead of passing it back, he lets it burn down another inch. I can hear Midoriya's molars grinding in the silence of the room.

"So," his dad says amiably. "This what you boys do all day?"

No one says anything.

He nods to himself as he rises with the blunt still pinched between his fingers. When it's no more than a roach, he flicks it into Midoriya's lap.

Midoriya lets it burn a hole into his tee. For some reason, they remind me of Touya and my dad.

His dad sighs as he walks himself out. "It isn't so different from what me and my old friends used to do, I suppose."

With all the weed burned up, I don't see any other reason to stick around. It sounds terrible, I know, but I'm really not in the mood to be around anyone lately. I'm trying my best not to let everyone's bullshit disturb my peace but it's really fucking hard to do sober.

I don't have to drop Katsuki off, so I just get in my car and play my music really fucking loud and drive home. I always drive back slowly since I have nothing to do.

There are more cars parked in the driveway. Keigo took my spot again. Someone needs to tell him that just because he's marrying into the family doesn't mean he's one of my brothers. He can't just take my fucking parking spot.

Anyway, I park across the street and pretend like the short walk doesn't fucking annoy me as much as it truly does.

When I go inside, my siblings are in the kitchen. It always felt like it was just the three of them and I was younger. Like I wasn't ever really related to any of them.

Touya goes out of his way to remind me of this.

"Aw, fuck. The fourth wheel's back." he remarks from the sink. Fuyumi's making him peel carrots.

I blink back. I don't understand what a fourth wheel is even supposed to mean. The fourth wheel on a car? Isn't that… how it's supposed to be?

"Shut the fuck up," Natsuo says, throwing in more washed vegetables in the sink for Touya to peel. The potatoes and turnips thud heavily into the basin.

I hope they're not making vegetable soup.

I fucking hate vegetable soup.

"We're making vegetable soup," Fuyumi states and I mentally tear all my hair out.

Why the fuck are we having soup in the middle of summer? Then I remember my mom's back and this is her comfort food because it requires very little chewing. "Sounds good," I say.

I pull my phone out to see what I'm going to order for dinner. As I flick through a few restaurants, I get a text from my ex. I can't believe I still have his number saved.

Inasa

Hey

Wyd

The screen almost cracks with how hard I'm squeezing my phone. He can fuck the hell off. I'm never talking to him again.

I hear Fuyumi try to get my attention over my rushing pulse in my ears. "Shouto, guess what."

"What?" I say. I'm no good at guessing. I tap into the conversation only because he hates being left on read more than my dad and I want to make sure he knows I'm ignoring his ass.

Touya grumbles and swears while I skim through a couple menus. Everything suddenly looks terrible. "Fuyumi, don't—"

"Touya just got back from group therapy." she announces.

That makes me look up from my phone. I don't understand why my brother would be embarrassed about this. It's almost like he has to keep up the image of being an untreatably immoral person.

"That's fantastic." I say flatly. It's not that I'm not happy for him, it's just that I sincerely doubt all the therapy in the world could fix whatever's wrong with any of us. I'm pretty sure we were all fucked at conception.

"And he made a friend!" she adds.

"We are not friends." Touya snarls, brandishing the peeled carrot like a shank.

"Oh, really?" Keigo asks, walking out of the bathroom. He better have washed his hands. "I didn't know that part. What's his name?"

Natsuo bites the end of the carrot and crunches it loudly. "Yeah, what is it?"

"I didn't make any fucking friends—"

"His name is Satoshi." she answers.

Touya reacts as if she'd just pulled his nudes out and was showing them to all of us. He flings the carrot in the sink and snatches the apron off his waist to throw it in Keigo's face.

If I dug a little deeper, I could probably find something telling about Touya's reaction, but my phone just buzzed again.

Inasa

I'm outside

The room spins. I need to hold on to the kitchen counter so I don't lose my balance again.

"Well, now that Touya's out, I guess someone else has to peel these…" Keigo remarks.

Natsuo scowls at him. "If you wanna stay for dinner, you're helping out. Put the fucking apron on, shithead."

"Shouto, would you get some more onions from the garage? Shouto?" Fuyumi calls. My name rings in my head.

When I bring my hand up to move my hair out of my face, I notice how wet my forehead is. It's literally always freezing in my house and I just broke a sweat. For a second, I think I'm actually about to have a panic attack.

I muster up all my strength to remain calm. "Hm?"

Inasa

Came to see you

I can already see my ex coming through the door—shoulder first since he's too broad to enter normally— as if he's not a walking disaster. I remember him trashing our hotel room after we'd make up. I remember sucking him off on his dirty car flood. I remember the dust on the curves of his headboard when he used to hold me down to fuck me.

"I asked if you could get us some more onions…" Fuyumi frowns at me. "Are you feeling okay?"

I blink. I can't remember the last time I felt okay.

"Oh. Sure. And yeah, I'm fine." I say, walking out the front door.

"They're in the garage—!" she calls before I slam the door behind me. The summer heat does nothing to cool me down. I was sweating inside, now I feel like I'm burning alive.

I see his red pick-up truck and have half the mind to spark my lighter in his gas tank.

His window rolls down as I get closer. It smells clean and crisp inside his car. His hairline's trimmed neatly like his eyebrows. He must've just left the barbershop. He's still as infuriatingly handsome as he was when he almost killed me.

I cross my arms. "What are you doing here?"

He grins at me, dimples pooling ominously on his stubble. "Nice to see you too."

I'm really not in the mood for his shit right now. Inasa always had terrible timing.

I scowl back at him. "Get the fuck outta here before my dad kills you."

"Woah. Kills me?" Inasa gasps. I fucking hate it when he mocks me like this. We both know my dad would fucking rip his head off if he saw him anywhere near me. "Why? What I do?"

I think playing all those sports in high school gave him enough concussions to sustain permanent brain damage. Inasa either doesn't see an issue with crashing my car into a bridge in an attempt to kill both of us after I tried breaking up with him, or he truly doesn't remember.

I remember waking up in the hospital with my dad and his lawyer beside me. He wanted to throw Inasa in jail for murder-suicide, but I wouldn't let him press any charges. My dad finally let Inasa walk after agreeing to a restraining order.

It's actually illegal for me to see my ex.

"Get out."

"Daddy's not home right now, is he?" he smiles again, glancing at the cars in my driveway. Neither of my parents are home. I think he's taking my mom out to buy her meds. "That shiny black Maserati's nowhere in sight."

Natsuo will still gladly step in for my dad. The only thing they agree on is how much they despise Inasa. I'm not trying to save my ex or anything, I just really don't need any more problems. I pinch the bridge of my nose. "Inasa, please, I'm asking you to leave—"

"Whose car is that?" he asks, staring at the red sports car parked under the tree across my house.

"My sister's—

His hand flies out of the window to grab me by the jaw. I keep my expression calm when his thumb juts into my chin as he inches my face closer to his. "Your sister drives a white tesla," he snarls against my lips, "Whose fucking car is parked in my spot?"

"My sister's boyfriend's." I snap back. "You never let me fucking finish."

Did this piece of shit really think I invited some other guy over? Did he forget my dad is more openly homophobic than his own?

I tear his hand off of me. Inasa scoffs as he lets his arm hang out the window. There's an awkward silence where there should be an apology.

"Just leave already," I say, willing to let it slide in exchange for a valium-induced nap.

"I drive all the way out here to see you and this is how you treat me?"

I slam my hands against his door. "Who the hell invited you over? When have I reached out in the past four fucking months to agree to seeing you? Get the fuck out my sight."

"Well, close your eyes, I guess." He sighs, leaning back into his seat. "'Cause I'm not going anywhere."

His words make my skin itch. I feel the terrible urge to scratch them out of my eardrums, and deeper still into my brain. Why is he Like This?

"Goddamn it." I spit, crossing the ten steps it takes to the passenger's seat.

If I can't make him fuck off, I can at least take him away from my house.

"Move up the block," I tell him, slamming the door shut after I get inside. "y family knows what your car looks like."

"Yes, ma'am," he nods before driving all the way out of the gates of my neighborhood.

I kick his glove compartment. "Shut the fuck up."

I hate the familiar smell of his wild cherry car freshener. I hate the familiar fucking gaming soundtrack that's always playing on his stereo. I hate the way he smiles over at me like we're still together.

"So," he says after he turns into the main road. "How've you been?"

"Fuckin' fantastic." I hiss. I hate how much I sound like Katsuki.

Inasa looks at me with an amused little frown. "That's good."

I cross my arms and look out the window. Inasa starts speeding to pass the guy in front of us.

"I've been good, too." he mentions, "If you care."

"I don't."

He nods as we reach a red light. I try not to give into the temptation of glancing over at him when he leans his arm over my seat and stares at my profile.

"Missed you, Shou,"

I let the shitty soundtrack fill my silence. I hope he doesn't think I missed him too.

He reaches out to stroke my cheek. I flinch away.

"Come on," he says, "Don't tell me you haven't missed me, 'cause I won't believe you."

I missed the musky smell of his deodorant. The heat of his tan skin. His wiry arm hair. His huge hands fisted in my nape. I missed texting him late at night to see if he was down to get something to eat or eat me out. I missed running my palms through his buzzcut. I missed him calling me Shou.

"You tried to kill me." I say and wince when my voice cracks. "Why on earth would I miss you?"

Inasa tucks a strand of hair behind my ear so I can see him clearly when he answers. "'Cause I'm your boyfriend?"

I roll my eyes. I'm tired of him playing dumb. I'm tired period.

I scrub my face with my left palm. "You're not my boyfriend anymore."

"No," he agrees, taking my chin softly this time. "But I'm still your boy." he says nudging my face closer. "And we're still friends, right?"

He leans in close enough to start breathing my air. I stare at the space between our lips until the gap closes.