Chapter 30
It was now 9:30 p.m. Double Dee and Marie had finished their dinner around two hours ago, and had made their way back to the cul-de-sac. After saying their good nights, and sharing a kiss, the two teenagers fled had to the comfort of their homes to escape the cold air, joining the remainder of their peers who had already escaped to their beds in an effort to rest up for the following school day.
While most of the cul-de-sac had already immersed themselves in the world of dreams, two particular individuals had not yet retired to their dwellings. Up in the "Melon Cave", Captain Melonhead, and his partner Splinter the Wonderwood were wide awake and at their post. The two were sharing a beach chair, keeping an ever vigilant eye over the Rethink Avenue cul-de-sac. Of course, due to being caught in the act of transporting Kevin's bike to the shop for repairs, the two were joined by their new sidekick, the Harlequin Honeydew (aka Nazz), who was currently sitting in a lawn chair opposite of Jonny and Plank.
While Jonny was quite enthusiastic about his position as the "eyes and ears" of Rethink Avenue, Nazz was less than thrilled with her job as the keeper of Haventhought Way. The Harlequin Honeydew costume consisted of a one piece, green female bathing suit, fully exposing the arms and thighs, accented by white cowgirl boots covering a large portion of her thighs. Her hands were covered with green gardeners gloves, and her eyes were masked with a lime green bandana, similar to one worn by Robin.
Due to the limited skin protection the costume had to offer, and the open air design of Jonny's tree house, Nazz was quite uncomfortable. She sat with her arms folded, her teeth chattering heavily as her entire body shivered due to the extreme cold. This coupled with the fact that Nazz was exhausted from the school day, made for a very uncomfortable experience.
In front of Nazz sat a telescope on a tripod, the intent being to be used as a tool to closely observe any potential events occurring within Haventhought Way. The two had been on watch for around two hours, the highlight of the night being the detection of a small skunk darting across Rethink Avenue.
Nazz glanced at her cell phone, noting the time, after which she turned towards Jonny.
"Jonny," said Nazz in a rather irritable tone, "It's 9:30 dude, shouldn't we be heading in? We got school tomorrow."
"Not quite yet HH," said Jonny as he scanned the lane with his telescope, "We still have a half hour left on patrol, and we must remain vigilant. Remember, crime and injustice can strike at any time."
"Right," said Nazz sarcastically, after which she sighed, folded her arms, and turned around to face Haventhought Way.
Unfortunately for her, Nazz's line of sight was directed toward the area behind Eddy's house, which was occupied by a large, three-story single family dwelling; the home of the Statorowski's. The backyard of the Statorowski residence was quite large, and consisted entirely of grass. The back face of the house was colored blue; a sliding glass door at ground level led into the kitchen, flanked by two large windows on both sides. Two windows, serving two second story rooms of unknown function, were placed directly above the two ground level windows; both were accented with elaborate shutters that seemed to be quite expensive. Finally, on the third story, in the center of the "triangle" created by the gable roof, was a single double hung window. This particular window served Lindsay's bedroom, the interior of which was masked by thin curtains, although the light from the lamps within managed to escape through.
"Great," whispered Nazz to herself, "Just my luck, I have to sit and stare at her house for the next half hour."
Just as Nazz completed her previous sentence, her eyes detected movement within Lindsay's backyard. The backyard did not have any lighting whatsoever, and the area was just at the limits of the range of the Rethink Avenue streetlights. Despite the low quality of illumination, Nazz was able to discern a human figure making it's way through Lindsay's backyard.
"Who is that?" asked Nazz as she leaned forward in her chair.
Jonny, without hesitation, turned around to face Nazz.
"What is it Honeydew?" asked Jonny, "Is there crime afoot?"
Jonny ran towards Nazz and promptly mounted the telescope, gazing towards the area of Lindsay's yard. Although the lighting was limited he was able to make out the identity of the individual; the stout body frame, yellow sweater, and thin black hair gave it away.
"Ah ha!" said Jonny, "Target sighted! Looks like Mr. McGee is paying Ms. Statorowski a visit!"
"Eddy?" asked Nazz in a surprised manner as she stood up from her chair, and grabbed a pair of binoculars to observe for herself, "What is he doing at Lindsay's?"
Eddy happened to be in the process of attempting to execute another phase of his Rolf/Lindsay plan. He had written a fake letter earlier that day, addressed from "Rolf" detailing his deep affections for the girl. He had retrieved a toy gun from his garage that fired darts tipped with suction cups, and was currently in the process of attaching the letter to the shaft of one of the darts with a piece of tape.
Nazz continued observing Eddy's action through the binoculars. As he worked to attach the letter to the dart, Nazz was able to partially discern the contents of the letter. In particular, she was able to make out the first few lines, written in Eddy's handwriting:
To my Lindsay,
You are the light of my life, the reason for my existence.
I want to hold you in my arms, and never let you go.
My dearest love, I...
Of course Eddy had not made up these words himself, rather they were plagiarized from a poem written in his English textbook. Nevertheless, due to Nazz's ignorance of Eddy's true intentions, she was quite flabbergasted by what she had seen. She lowered her binoculars, her face displaying a confused expression.
Inside the Statorowski house, all was dark and quiet with the exception of one room located on the third floor. The room was quite large, around the size of the living room of a typical residence. The walls were covered with hot pink wall paper, which was accented with graphics of red roses. A door on the wall opposite of the window led to an extremely large walk-in closet, which was filled with what seemed to be hundreds of shirts, pants, dresses, and shoes. A hook was mounted on the outside of the door, on which hung Lindsay's signature maroon designer coat. A few feet from the closet door was a door leading to Lindsay's personal bathroom, which was currently cracked open, revealing a small amount of the white tiled floor.
Across the room sat a large, elaborate cherry vanity. The top surface was covered with piles of makeup kits, nail polish, and other beauty accessories. A large mirror was mounted to the top of the vanity, the perimeter of which was accented by various pictures of Lindsay taken throughout her career modeling designer winter clothes.
A few feet away from the vanity was a large queen sized canopy bed, complete with a wooden headboard and sheets in various hues of pink. Next to the bed sat a red night stand, on which sat a small lamp, currently acting as the only light source for the room. Directly next to her bed, a long sleeved bath robe hung from the canopy for protection from the cold, in case a trip to the bathroom was needed.
Lindsay herself had changed into her pajamas and climbed underneath her bed covers. She was currently wearing a purple nightgown which, when standing would hang to her knees, exposing her shins and bare feet. The gown was sleeveless, and the shoulder straps were accented with white graphics made of silk. Her hair, which nearly always hung to her shoulders in loose waves, had been placed into a tight bun for sleeping; her signature large gold-hooped earrings had also been removed and placed into their box on the vanity for safe keeping. Finally, the mauve eye shadow that usually adorned her chestnut shaped eyes had been removed.
Lindsay was currently leaning her back against the headboard; sitting up as her red comforter covered her body up to her waist.
In her hands, Lindsay clutched a framed photograph, viewing it intently under the dim light of her lamp. The photograph depicted a small blonde haired girl. The young girl appeared to be five years old, and was wearing purple business attire tailored to her size. The girl was smiling happily as she clasped her hands in front of her. To her left, a large framed man kneeled on one knee. The man was dressed in a well pressed black-colored three piece suit, accented by a red tie. His blonde hair was gel styled, and combed to the front. He too was smiling heavily, as he placed his arm around the small girls shoulder. The frame of the photograph was colored blue, and was adorned with gold letters reading "Daddy's Little Helper."
Lindsay continued to stare at the photograph for a few more seconds with a somber expression, at which point a series of three knocks rang out from the area of the door leading to the hallway. These knocks were followed by the shrill voice of her mother, reminding Lindsay that "It was time for bed, and a good night sleep was the key to keeping youthful looks."
Lindsay, in what seemed like an instant, shoved the photograph underneath her pillow as if she were attempting to keep it a secret. She pulled the covers over the remainder of her body, and reached for the lamp switch.
"Yes mother," said Lindsay in a rather polite manner as she switched off the lamp.
Lindsay listened as her mother's footsteps traveled down the hallway, eventually culminating with the sound her bedroom door closing. Lindsay rolled her eyes, punched her pillow, and forcefully laid down on her side as if she were agitated.
Back outside in the Melon Tower, Nazz and Jonny continued to observe Eddy's actions with surprise. They watched as Eddy loaded the pistol with the modified dart, aimed it towards Lindsay's bedroom window, and carefully pulled the trigger. The toy discharged the dart with an audible click, which was followed by the sound of the suction cup hitting the exterior of Lindsay's window. The dart remained in place on Lindsay's window as planned, at which time Eddy quickly scampered through the yard towards the fence. He quickly scaled the fence and disappeared into the darkness of the lane.
Jonny pulled his eye away from the telescope as Nazz lowered the binoculars away from her eyes, both adolescents being quite confused at the display they had just witnessed.
"Well," said Jonny, "It looks like our little friend Eddy is playing a little bit of hanky panky with Lindsay behind Lee's back. What a dirty trick!"
Jonny turned and began walking towards the ladder leading down to his backyard.
"Come on Honeydew," said Jonny, "To the Melon Mobile, we must go alert Lee of these misdeeds."
"Whoa Jonny, I..."
Jonny cut Nazz off with the emission of an over exaggerated "throat clearing" sound. Nazz sighed, and realizing the meaning of Jonny's signal, continued her statement accordingly.
"Melonhead, I know what it looks like," said Nazz, "But there has to be some kind of explanation for this. I mean, who would want to try to get with Lindsay? She's like the meanest girl that ever walked the earth."
Nazz pondered the situation for a few brief seconds, at which point she determined a path forward that would appease Jonny's superhero game.
"Look, Jonn...uh Melonhead," said Nazz as she walked toward the large headed boy, "I'll level with you dude. I agree that if Eddy is cheating on Lee, she needs to know about it. But let's not jump in and stir the pot right away. I don't think we have enough evidence that Eddy is truly attempting to get with Lindsay. There may be an explainable reason for this, and I don't want to alert Lee and potentially cause trouble over an unfounded accusation."
Nazz, playing into Jonny's game, stood at attention and saluted her superior.
"Captain," said Nazz, "Harlequin Honeydew recommends that we conduct a close observation of citizen Eddy over the next few days, the purpose being to ensure that he is in fact not committing relationship adultery and, if he is, to gather official evidence to plead our case."
Jonny stood still for a few moments, after which he raised his hand to return the salute.
"Harlequin Honeydew," said Jonny, "I admire your thinking skills. You are most definitely a great asset to our team. The plan is set, we will observe citizen Eddy closely over the course of the next few days to ensure that he is remaining faithful to his commitment to citizen Lee."
Jonny lowered his hand, turned away from Nazz, and traveled back to his beach chair to resume watch of the lane. Nazz ground her teeth, turned around, and took a seat in her own beach chair. The young girl was now faced with two dilemmas; the burden of playing into Jonny's superhero game, and by proxy, the burden of the knowledge that her best friend's sisters boyfriend is attempting to court Lindsay behind her back. While the idea of Eddy courting Lindsay seemed farfetched, Nazz could not help but wonder in the back of her mind if there was any possibility that it could be true.
Nevertheless, Nazz had decided to stick to her plan of observation, and keep the information to herself until the time was right. Stressed out beyond belief, she leaned back in her chair, let out a long sigh, and muttered a few words to herself.
"Damn it Julia," said Nazz, Couldn't you have drove a little faster?"
As these events unfolded outside, Lindsay had just laid her head down in preparation for her so called beauty sleep. No sooner than Lindsay's head hit the pillow, a loud tap sounded from the general direction of her bedroom window. Startled, Lindsay rose out of her bed and flung off her comforter. She immediately reached for her robe, sliding her arms through the long sleeves to protect them from the cold, and kicked her feet into her bedroom slippers. She jogged towards the window, quickly opening the curtains to determine the source of the noise.
An initial scan through her backyard revealed nothing; Eddy had made his shot and quickly darted over the fence to the lane in an effort to remain undetected. Accordingly, the only evidence of his presence was the note he had written, currently attached to a suction dart stuck to the exterior of her window.
Lindsay rolled her eyes, cracked open the window, and reached outside to grab the dart. She re-closed the window, and made her way back towards her bed, illuminating her lamp in the process. She removed the note from the dart, sat on the mattress, and began reading the note. Upon completion, she rolled her eyes and tossed the note on the floor.
"He can't even make up his own poem," said Lindsay, obviously realizing that Eddy had plagiarized the letter, "And he thinks he's going to trick me into ditching the winter ball queen, I'm not an idiot."
Lindsay sighed as she removed her robe, kicked off her bedroom slippers, and climbed back into bed.
"It's all a sham," said Lindsay, "Just like everything else."
Lindsay reached toward her prized grey handbag, currently sitting on the night stand. She placed her hand inside, removing a white piece of paper that appeared to be torn in half. She clutched the paper in both her hands, her hot pink nails standing out against the white background, as her eyes scanned the page. After a few seconds, she placed the paper back into her handbag, and reached for the lamp.
"At least all of this craziness is one way to keep her in my life," said Lindsay in a rather somber tone after which she clicked off the lamp.
