Chapter 61

Following her statement, Lee casually tossed the letter and the photographs over her shoulder. She then placed her hand on her hip, cocked her head to the right and leaned downward towards Eddy.

"Does this have something to do with why you were late to dinner after the talent show?" asked Lee, "And why you didn't want to stay for dinner after our last practice? I knew something was up when you turned down a blowjob."

Eddy said absolutely nothing; the small Ed boys continued to appear quite nervous, as sweat began pouring down his face at a rate comparable to Niagra Falls. He swallowed heavily, continuing to stare into Lee's eyes as he contemplated is eventual explanation. As Eddy struggled to get words out, Marie and May looked upon the situation with nervous expressions, preparing themselves for the inevitable chaos.

After what seemed like an eternity, Rolf decided to chime in yet again.

"Ed Boy!" yelled Rolf, "Not only have you shamed Rolf by capturing Rolf's sweet Babushka in your gretchens of affection, but you have also lied to Rolf! Those tokens of affection were meant to be from Rolf, were they not!"

"Okay, now I'm really confused," said Lee as she looked back down towards Eddy with distress, "Can somebody tell me what the fuck is going on here!?"

"Yeah Eddy!" yelled Nazz as she stepped forward towards the small Ed boy, "Why don't you tell Lee what you've been doing!? I can't believe you'd be such a jerk, especially to someone who cares so much about you. It like, makes me so sick you know!"

At the completion of Nazz's statement, Jonny jumped in, continuing the "interrogation" initiated by Nazz.

"In the name of justice," said Jonny, "We order you to come clean regarding your misdeeds, and admit your wrongdoings to citizen Lee!"

As Eddy continued to be interrogated by Lee, Jonny and Nazz, the short boy's stress level began to climb. Unfortunately, the combination of being stressed by Lee's constant nagging concerning Lindsay, worrying about what he could procure as Lee' Christmas present, trying to hide his plan to get rid of Lindsay, and worrying about whether or not Lee cared just as much about him as he did her, drove the boy to his breaking point. As his face turned red with anger, he decided to finally reply, using his typical obnoxious, gritty voice.

"Shut up both of ya!" yelled Eddy in the direction of Jonny and Nazz, after which he turned towards Lee, "Alright, you want the truth here it is. I'm sick of hearing about all of this bullshit about Lindsay, and I'm sick of being dragged into everybody else's problems. I saw how much of a pain in the ass she was, and nobody was doing anything about it so I decided to take matters into my own hands!"

Eddy pointed towards Rolf.

"I took advantage of the fact that he liked Lindsay, and she hated him!" said Eddy, "I did everything in my power to try to use his weirdo customs to drive her away. I wrote fake notes, made fake gifts, and made him believe that she actually would go out with him. I wasn't cheating on anybody, I had to do something, she was ruining everybody's life!"

At that moment, the cul-de-sac fell into complete silence. Back near the Kankers house, May bit her bottom lip out of nervousness, as Marie slapped her hand to her forehead in frustration.

Upon hearing the truth regarding Eddy's matchmaking plan, Rolf's anger (due to the fact that he had thought Eddy was in fact in a relationship with Lindsay) had disappeared. Instead, the tall boy appeared completely distraught; his menacing glare had transformed into a frown, as his eyes began to appear glassy.

"The twiddling of affections between Rolf and his Sweet Babushka were lies?" asked Rolf, "Rolf refuses to believe!"

Perhaps the most upset individual of all was Lee, who had also developed a melancholy expression; there was no doubt that she was truly hurt over the ordeal. Nevertheless, she attempted to maintain her stoic face, as her eyes began to tear up from behind her glasses.

"So," said Lee, "You went behind my back! I told ya I had it taken care of, and you still decided to get involved!"

"What was I supposed to do!" yelled Eddy, "She's ruining my life! Because of her, I'm being forced into going to this stupid winter ball, not to mention having my money taken away! Then I have to practice fairy dancing for a week, and go up on stage in front of everyone to be laughed at like some sideshow attraction! I've been nothing but miserable for the past two weeks!"

At that point, Lee could no longer contain the tear beginning to form in her right eye. She promptly reached up underneath her glasses, taking care to remove it before it became visible while unfortunately smearing her eye liner in the process.

"I wanted to do something together as a couple!" yelled Lee in an emotional tone, her voice wavering slightly, "You were miserable? I thought we were having fun! You don't care about my feelings at all, you only care about yourself!"

"I only care about myself!?" yelled Eddy, "What about you!? You didn't even want to hear my thoughts on any of this, you just kept demanding more and more and more!"

The entire cul-de-sad watched in silence as the argument between the red-headed Kanker sister and the stout Ed Boy escalated exponentially. Within five minutes, the peace and calm of the sunny afternoon had disappeared, replaced by complete chaos. As the two teenagers continued to argue, Marie and May continued to oversee nervously, neither girl moving a muscle while appearing to have been stricken with rigor mortis. Double Dee and Ed expressed the same concern; the two boys shared a mutual love for the holiday season, and knew that all of this fighting would no doubt shatter the spirit within their group of friends.

As Lindsay observed the nasty exchange of words between her ex-best friend and her boyfriend, the blonde girl slowly pulled her head back around the corner. She took a position leaning on the wooden fence, still within listening range, and adopted an expression of distress. A few seconds passed, at which point she lifted her hand and placed it over her mouth as a slight tear began running down the length of her face. While she had known that her stunt could potentially cause friction in Lee's relationship, seeing Lee upset firsthand seemed to strike an emotional nerve within the girl.

"You don't understand!" yelled Lee in an emotional tone, surprising Eddy slightly, "You never even tried to understand the situation."

"Oh I understand!" said Eddy, "Understand that I'm tired of being forced to do things against my will, I'm tired of your constant nagging, and most of all, I'm tired of hearing about that no good bimbo Lindsay Statorowski. Ever since she moved here there's been nothing but trouble, and I feel like her name's the only thing I heard come out of your mouth."

Eddy lifted his hands up to his eyes and acted as if he was crying.

"Boo Hoo," said Eddy, "I was picked on all my life too, but you don't hear me constantly talking about it do ya!? Well guess what I'm done dealing with your problems."

Eddy took a deep breath, at which point he delivered one final statement in a loud, booming voice; a voice not heard since he quelled the Kankers attack on Double Dee after his infamous fist fight with Jimmy.

"DO YOURSELF A DAMN FAVOR AND GET OVER IT, OR WE'RE OVER!"

Roughly five seconds of silence followed Eddy's statement, although it seemed as if it were an eternity. During this time, Lee stood as still as a statue, staring into Eddy's angry face with a neutral expression. Eventually her bottom lip began to tremble, as tears began to run down her face uncontrollably. The proud, stoic girl quickly shielded her face to avoid being seen expressing emotion, turned away from Eddy, and ran as fast as she could across the street toward her house. Upon reaching the front door, she struggled for a few seconds to remove the house keys from her pocket. Once removed, she attempted to insert the key into the door, a task made difficult by the fact that her hands were shaking due to her emotional state. She was eventually able to open the door, after which she disappeared into the house; but not before slamming the door shut.

No sooner than the door handle latched, Marie began making her way towards Eddy; stomping angrily as an intense scowl appeared on her face. Upon reaching the stout Ed boy, she grabbed his collar with both of her hands.

"You little jerk!" yelled Marie, "Who do you think you are telling her to get over it huh!? You have no idea what she's been through!"

"Get the hell off of me!" yelled Eddy as he swatted Marie's hands away, "You have no idea what I've been through, and our relationship's none of your business anyway!"

As Eddy and Marie initiated a brand new argument, Rolf began to slowly back away from the action. The tall foreign boy was quite upset that he was possibly deceived, not only by Eddy, but by Lindsay as well. In complete denial of the situation, he decided to take action to find out the truth.

"Rolf's heart aches from all of these lies!" said Rolf in a melodramatic manner, "Rolf must go see his Sweet Babushka and ensure that all is fine with our relationship!"

As the argument between Eddy and Marie continued, Rolf began to run towards the end of the street, intent on making his way to Lindsay's house in an effort to confirm that their relationship was genuine. Lindsay, upon hearing Rolf's approach, emitted a slight gasp and began running as fast as she could down the cross street towards Haventhought Way.

Unfortunately, speed running was easier said than done for Lindsay for multiple reasons. The combination of low endurance, due to rarely progressing over anything but a brisk walk, and her high heeled boots seemed to make the simple task a chore; in addition, with each step, Lindsay's face appeared to grimace as if she were experiencing pain in the joints of her legs.

The lanky debutante had barely made ten steps toward the end of the street, by which time Rolf had made his way around the corner and spotted her.

"My Beautiful Schmetlockin!" yelled Rolf enthusiastically as he jogged in an effort to catch up to Lindsay.

Lindsay stopped running and planted both of her feet flat on the ground, putting an end to her futile escape attempt. She remained still, her right hand wrapped around her rib as she lifted her left up towards her mouth; her eyes were wide and glassy, and she appeared to be deep in thought.

"Lidsy," said Rolf as he approached Lindsay from behind, "Rolf has been deceived by the snake-in-the-grass Ed boy and is confused regarding our relationship. Rolf and his sweet Babushka are tied in the locks of affections in truth, yes?"

Lindsay paused for a few moments, thoughts racing through her head at a rapid pace as she pondered the situation she was faced with. She eventually decided to reply.

"Not right now Rolf," said Lindsay, refusing to turn around to face the boy, "I need some time to think."

At that moment, Lindsay began walking away from Rolf's position at a rapid pace. Unsatisfied with the answer provided, Rolf decided to give chase.

"Lidsy, must you not hear Rolf's words!?" asked Rolf as he followed the tall girl, "You appear to be upset, please allow Rolf to walk you back to your residence and console you in the arms of this son of a shepherd. Rolf recalls that we must also obtain flowers for our trek to the holiday hootinanny set to take place tomorrow no?"

Lindsay continued on her way, pretending not to hear Rolf's words, as the boy continued to follow her.

"Lidsy!" yelled Rolf as he reached out and grabbed her shoulder, "Please hear Rolf's pleas!"

As Rolf grabbed Lindsay's shoulder, the force caused the fabric constituting Lindsay's ever present fur coat to undergo a slight stress. The force was not enough to tear the coat, but there was no doubt that the blonde girl could feel the fabric being stretched. Rolf's action apparently set off a proverbial alarm within Lindsay's psyche; this combined with the stress she was under to win the ball crown, and the knowledge that she had single handedly hurt Lee's feelings, seemed to push her to the breaking point.

"Don't touch me you freak!" yelled Lindsay as she whipped around, batting Rolf's hand away from her coat, "Are you stupid or something? Did you not hear what that midget said out there!? You were nothing but a scam to get back at Lee. You can forget about coming to the dance, you've done all I need you to do. Quit following me, and stay away from me for now on. We're through!"

Lindsay whipped around and continued on her way down the cross street, disappearing from view as she turned onto Haventhought Way. Rolf remained in his position, paralyzed with shock upon the realization that his relationship was all a lie. The teary eyed teenager proceeded to place his hand on his chest.

"Rolf's heart," said Rolf in a quiet manner as tears began streaming down his face, "It's broken."

Back on the cul-de-sac, Eddy and Marie continued to exchange words as the remainder of the children looked on. Ed and May stood in silence, periodically exchanging nervous expressions, and feeling powerless to help the situation. Likewise, Jonny and Nazz remained mute, seemingly dumbstruck at the events triggered by their sudden intervention.

Double Dee, however, seemed to be quite unhappy with the events taking place before him. For a couple of weeks, the boy had been in the middle of moral dilemma; he had been entrusted with information regarding the reasoning for the bitter rivalry between Lee and Lindsay, but was not able to take any action to remedy the situation. In addition, he was completely aware of the plan Eddy had concocted to use Rolf as a Lindsay repellent, and his pleas for Eddy to cease and desist before things got out of hand fell on deaf ears.

Double Dee's moral conscience had taken a beating, and it was quite obvious that the boy was becoming fed up with the sneakiness that had been displayed by his friends throughout the holiday season. Seeing his two closest connections at each others throats, over issues resulting from their own personal actions, brought an intense anger to the usual docile boy. As he continued to listen to the shouting match, the boy began to adopt a gradual appearance of anger; his face turned from a shade of pink, to a shade of dark red in manner of seconds, as his eyebrows gradually turned downwards. He began showing his teeth, as if he were a predatory animal ready to pounce on it's prey. As the jugular veins on both sides of his neck began to become prominent due to high blood pressure, the sock-headed boy finally decided to break his silence.

"ENOUGH!" yelled Double Dee at the top of his lungs, silencing the argument, and gaining the attention of everyone standing within the cul-de-sac.

In an instant, Eddy and Marie ceased their exchange of words, freezing in place as if they were wax figures; Marie had grabbed Eddy by the collar of his shirt with her left hand, and had her right fist raised, appearing as if she were about to deliver a punch to the boy. Eddy had lifted his hand up to defend from the punch, while grabbing Marie's forearm with his opposite hand. Both teenagers now stood with wide eyes, staring in the direction of Double Dee.

As Double Dee began angrily making his way towards the two individuals, Jonny attempted to intervene.

"Citizen Double Dee," said Jonny, "Please leave the breakup of fights to the experienced crime fighters, for our creed..."

Double Dee immediately turned toward Jonny and Nazz.

"Your assistance is neither desired or required!" yelled Double Dee as he pointed toward Jonny's house, "Both of you, leave immediately!"

Without hesitation, Jonny and Nazz both scattered in the direction of their respective residences. Both were completely silent, apparently realizing the dire nature of the situation they exacerbated.

After dismissing the dynamic superhero duo, Double Dee turned his attention back to Eddy and Marie.

"You and You!" said Double Dee as he pointed to Eddy and Marie in sequence, "For the past week, I have been forced to stand by and observe the neighborhood fall into disfunction as a result of both of your actions. Well, I am here to tell you that I will be silenced no more, and I will not entertain any additional secrets, or scams!"

Double Dee paused to catch his breath.

"To think how much emotional turmoil all of this has caused," said Double Dee, "Because of both of your actions, Lee is now upset beyond belief, poor Rolf's heart has been broken, a beautiful relationship has potentially been destroyed, and most of all, the joy associated with the holiday season has been completely shattered!"

At that point, Double Dee turned and began making his way up the gravel path leading to his front door. As he took a hold of the door handle, he turned around and delivered one final line to his best friend and girlfriend.

"Until you two decide to be open and honest individuals," yelled Double Dee, "Don't look to me for any assistance in solving any further problems, that is, unless you wish to proceed in a morally acceptable direction. I will entertain nothing but the truth from this moment forward!"

Double Dee entered his home, and slammed the wooden door behind him leaving Marie and Eddy in shock at the display they had just witnessed. While Marie appeared quite disheartened, Eddy scoffed at Double Dee's comments.

"Oh so now it's my fault!?" yelled Eddy, in an aggressive manner towards Double Dee's house, "I've bent over backwards this whole season to please everyone, including you, and now I'm taking all the heat!?"

Eddy turned away from his friends, and began walking towards the end of the street.

"I don't need this crap right now!" said Eddy, "I got better things to do than get blamed for everybody else's problems!"

Marie, May and Ed observed Eddy make his way towards the end of the street, turning the corner onto the cross street and disappearing from view. A few seconds passed, at which point Marie made her way over toward the sidewalk, took a seat on it's concrete ledge, and buried her face into the palms of her hands.

May and Ed shared a melancholy glance for a few moments. Ed, recognizing that it was time for him to leave and provide the sisters some privacy, kissed his Little May goodbye, and began his journey down the sidewalk toward his forest green residence.

May, deeply disheartened by all of the negativity, slowly walked towards the end of the sidewalk, and took a seat next to her sister. Marie sensed her presence, lifting her head as she let out a sigh and began a conversation.

"Well," said Marie, "What a great way to start winter recess. Lee's pissed off, her and Eddy are at odds, and now Double Dee's mad at me. Not that I blame him, I brought this on myself."

"Don't beat yourself up," said May, "You were just trying to protect Lee, like any good sister would."

"By doing what?" asked Marie, "Bringing my boyfriend into the middle of it, and not allowing him to help? By standing by, knowing that Lee was being lied to? By not being proactive enough!"

Marie stared forward, at which point a scowl appeared on her face.

"Face it, this whole holiday season is ruined," said Marie, "And it's all that no good slut Lindsay's fault."

May watched nervously as Marie rose from her sitting position.

"Double Dee's right," said Marie, "I'm tired of sitting back, watching my sister suffer over and over again. I'm going to get her back for everything, what she did to Lee back in Kindergarten, and for what she did to us all of those years. I swear it."

Marie pounded her right fist into her left palm in a fit of rage, after which she turned towards her little sister. May, adverse to conflict in general, elected to remain silent, staring wide-eyed at her sisters violent tirade. After a few moments, Marie calmed down slightly and, with a sigh, returned to a seated position next to her sister.

"I guess the first thing we need to do is go in there and make sure Lee's okay," said Marie.

"Yeah," said May, "Let's tackle one problem at a time!"

At the conclusion of May's statement, the Kankers front door flung open with force, emitting a loud slam. Almost immediately, Lee emerged from within, shielding her face as to avoid the profuse tears flowing down her cheeks from being seen. She bolted across the lawn, carrying her mother's car keys in her hand.

Before Marie and May could react, Lee had opened the driver's side door of Tabby's sedan and jumped into the seat. The tall red-head started the engine, and placed he the car into reverse. Neglecting to buckle her seat belt, she turned her head around, and while placing her right arm on the back of the passenger seat for support, accelerated the car in reverse down the driveway, turning it onto Rethink avenue to facilitate travel towards the outlet. While the car was still moving slowly in reverse, Lee shifted the vehicle into drive and slammed her high heeled boot onto the accelerator. The vehicles tired peeled out with an audible screech for a few seconds, after which the car began traveling at a high rate of speed toward the end of the street. May and Marie stared in surprise as Lee ignored the use of turn signals, turned the vehicle on to cross street and disappeared from view.

As the sound of the cars engine fell out of hearing range, Marie turned towards her little sister with fearful eyes. The black-haired girl shrugged her shoulders and decided to comment.

"Whelp," said Marie, "Now we got an even bigger problem to solve!"

As Marie and May conversed on Rethink Avenue, Lee maintained her speed, traveling down the cross street at a rapid pace. Despite not possessing a driver's license, Lee was quite the adept motorist, weaving in and out of lanes somewhat recklessly in an effort to pass "slow drivers". While she ignored most traffic rules, she did respect the red traffic signal at the end of the street, carefully slowing the car to a stop at the intersection.

It was apparent that Lee was quite distraught over her fight with Eddy. Tears seeped out of her eyes, running down her cheeks from underneath her glasses at an alarming rate, while carrying a large amount of her black eyeliner with them. Lee was, in fact, in the middle of an extreme anxiety attack; something she had not had since she attended her retreat last June, and received medication to counteract its effects. In addition, voices of a malicious nature were running through her head, another issue she had not experienced since her time away from Peach Creek, and one which she had hoped she would never have to experience again.

As Lee waited at the red light, sobbing uncontrollably, she reached for the vehicles center storage console and promptly opened it. From within, she retrieved a pack of Tabby's cigarettes and a lighter. The red headed girl proceeded to open the pack, (struggling to do so due to her hands shaking profusely from the anxiety), removed a cigarette, and placed it into her mouth. She held the lighter up to it's end, cupped her palm around it's flint, and flicked the knob a few times, eventually succeeding in lighting the cigarette.

Lee took a long, steady draw from the cigarette, coughing heavily after she did so. It had been around two years since Lee had decided to stop sneaking Tabby's cigarettes after a six month binge, and her lungs were simply not used to the reintroduction of the toxins. She pressed the door mounted button, lowering the driver's side window slightly, after which she removed the cigarette from her mouth and blew the exhaust out into the atmosphere. The slim girl sat in silence, cradling the smoldering cigarette between the index finger and middle finger of her right hand. She stared towards the sky as tears continued to stream down her face, awaiting the traffic signal to turn green.