A/N I showed this to my English teacher and he told me to used more adverbs and stop using said, so here we gooooooooooo!1! Oh fuck my life

Lord Hadrian Black-Brunette-Granger-Slytherin-Gryffindor-Gaunt-Lovegood-Peverell-Potter was happy after finishing viciously fucking his harem. However, he had stumbled into a serious problem, the plot had not been advanced at all. Like all the potential problems Lord Hadrian Black-Brunette-Granger-Slytherin-Gryffindor-Gaunt-Lovegood-Peverell-Potter faced, it would be cleared aside with barely a hint of struggle.

Lord Hadrian Black-Brunette-Granger-Slytherin-Gryffindor-Gaunt-Lovegood-Peverell-Potter and his harem were standing in a plain group, with the story's text showing no information about their mannerisms or group dynamic. Standing up from his sofa, which only appeared in the scene for this sentence, Lord Hadrian Black-Brunette-Granger-Slytherin-Gryffindor-Gaunt-Lovegood-Peverell-Potter made a quick announcement to his girls quickly, Lady Obligatory Brunette-Black, Lady Hermione Granger-Gryffindor, Lady Luna Lovegood-Peverall and Lady Daphne Greengrass-Slytherin.

"Well ladies, we need to advance the plot, so let's get going!" He exclaimed, striding seriously towards the door.

As he left the door slowly, and hurriedly grabbed his harem, the decor of Greengrass manor faded, instead turning into the quidditch world cup. There was a riot, using his amazing magical skills Lord Hadrian Black-Brunette-Granger-Slytherin-Gryffindor-Gaunt-Lovegood-Peverell-Potter brutally murdered a rioter, and a muggle for funsies. He then saw a beautiful blonde girl, with massive S sized breasts and an hourglass figure being raped tremendously. Lord Hadrian Black-Brunette-Granger-Slytherin-Gryffindor-Gaunt-Lovegood-Peverell-Potter then used his amazing magical skills to OBLITERATE the rapist in an EDGY way. After that happened, the beautiful girl thanked Lord Hadrian Black-Brunette-Granger-Slytherin-Gryffindor-Gaunt-Lovegood-Peverell-Potter gratefully.

"Thankzzzzz vewy muchssz Lord Hadrian Black-Brunette-Granger-Slytherin-Gryffindor-Gaunt-Lovegood-Peverell-Potter. Me namez Fleur." The beautiful blonde slurred sexily. "Maybez we vill meetz again sometimes?" She asked sexily. Smirking, Lord Hadrian Black-Brunette-Granger-Slytherin-Gryffindor-Gaunt-Lovegood-Peverell-Potter engaged Fleur in French.

"Lady Fleur Delacour, you don't need to worry about speaking English to me, for I am a love machine, therefore French comes to me naturally. You are quite beautiful, may I kiss your hand?" Lord Hadrian Black-Brunette-Granger-Slytherin-Gryffindor-Gaunt-Lovegood-Peverell-Potter asked eloquently, looking at Lady Daphne Greengrass-Slytherin's smirk of approval as he followed proper pureblood etiquette. Not that Lord Hadrian Black-Brunette-Granger-Slytherin-Gryffindor-Gaunt-Lovegood-Peverell-Potter needed the approval of a woman, of course.

"Thank you very much Lord Hadrian Black-Brunette-Granger-Slytherin-Gryffindor-Gaunt-Lovegood-Peverell-Potter," Fleur replied in French. "I will see you again," and then the blonde girl disappeared gracefully. Smirking again, Lord Hadrian Black-Brunette-Granger-Slytherin-Gryffindor-Gaunt-Lovegood-Peverell-Potter turned around to see the entire Weasley family gathered around the Burrow, the scene easily changing to fit what was most convenient for Lord Hadrian Black-Brunette-Granger-Slytherin-Gryffindor-Gaunt-Lovegood-Peverell-Potter.

The first Weasley to approach Lord Hadrian Black-Brunette-Granger-Slytherin-Gryffindor-Gaunt-Lovegood-Peverell-Potter was Molly Weasley.

"You're a fat overweight bitch who stole my money and tried to love potion me. I hate you!" Lord Hadrian Black-Brunette-Granger-Slytherin-Gryffindor-Gaunt-Lovegood-Peverell-Potter shouted calmly.

"NOOOOOOOOOO. MY PRECIOUS LOVE POTIONS!" Molly screeched. The fat overweight bitch then melted into a puddle on the floor. Lord Hadrian Black-Brunette-Granger-Slytherin-Gryffindor-Gaunt-Lovegood-Peverell-Potter then turned to Ginny.

"You're a love potioning bitch, who never saw me as a person, who stole all my money, and you're a whore!" Lord Hadrian Black-Brunette-Granger-Slytherin-Gryffindor-Gaunt-Lovegood-Peverell-Potter explained kindly.

"But Harry, you're not meant to use dark magic. You're meant to marry me and we're gonna live happily ever after," Ginny moaned, masturbating to the thought of cheating on Lord Hadrian Black-Brunette-Granger-Slytherin-Gryffindor-Gaunt-Lovegood-Peverell-Potter as Lady Potter.

Then there was Ron the death eater/Slob/idiot/love potion giver/loyalty potion giver/money stealer/dumb/super uncool/ugly/bad guy/soo stupid he can't even breathe without help/poor/not from a noble family/doesnt even follow wizarding traditions and customs like the good guy Draco Malfoy/just plain bad Weasley. Also disgustingly overweight, and currently shoving a massive human child into his gullet, Ron the death eater/Slob/idiot/love potion giver/loyalty potion giver/money stealer/dumb/super uncool/ugly/bad guy/soo stupid he can't even breathe without help/poor/not from a noble family/doesnt even follow wizarding traditions and customs like the good guy Draco Malfoy/just plain bad Weasley screamed at Lord Hadrian Black-Brunette-Granger-Slytherin-Gryffindor-Gaunt-Lovegood-Peverell-Potter.

"HARRY, WE WERE MEANT TO BE BEST FRIENDS. I WAS MEANT TO BE RICH AND FAMOUS AND THIN AND AWESOME, AND YOU WENT AND STOLE MY MUD BLOOD FROM ME!" Ron the death eater/Slob/idiot/love potion giver/loyalty potion giver/money stealer/dumb/super uncool/ugly/bad guy/soo stupid he can't even breathe without help/poor/not from a noble family/doesnt even follow wizarding traditions and customs like the good guy Draco Malfoy/just plain bad Weasley said eloquently.

"YOU ALSO USED DARK MAGIC!" Molly screeched annoyingly. Fed up of their ravings, Lord Hadrian Black-Brunette-Granger-Slytherin-Gryffindor-Gaunt-Lovegood-Peverell-Potter waved his hands and magiced them all away, apart from Fred and George.

"Hello," Gred uttered mischievously.

"Lord," Forge boomed delicately.

"Hadrian," Gred intoned cunningly.

"Black," Forge groaned intelligently.

"Brunette," Gred added inquisitively.

"Granger," Forge stated aggressively.

"Slytherin," Gred claimed imperiously.

Gryffindor," Forge asserted timidly.

"Gaunt," Gred mimicked seriously.

"Lovegood," Forge laughed sadly.

"Peverell," Gred Supercaliwhythefuckareyoureadingthisalidocioused briefly.

"Potter," Forge interjected solemnly.

"Because," Gred ejaculated effectively.

"We're," Forge drooled eloquently.

"Bullies," Gred connived kindly.

"You're," Forge hinted beautifully.

"Cool," Gred muttered loudly.

"With," Forge SHOUTED eloquently.

"Us," Gred smirked awesomely.

"Right?" Forge and Gred interrogated in their very amusing twinspeak.

Lord Hadrian Black-Brunette-Granger-Slytherin-Gryffindor-Gaunt-Lovegood-Peverell-Potter smirked, greatly enjoying the twins amusing joke, he then opened his mouth to respond to their question. "That's right Gred and Forge. I'm also going to fund your entire joke shop thingy thing because you guys are cool." Lord Hadrian Black-Brunette-Granger-Slytherin-Gryffindor-Gaunt-Lovegood-Peverell-Potter reasoned reasonably. With that scene over, the burrow faded away again, this time being replaced with a magically expanded Hogwarts express carriage.

"Tie me up Master Lord Hadrian Black-Brunette-Granger-Slytherin-Gryffindor-Gaunt-Lovegood-Peverell-Potter," Lady Luna Lovegood Peverall uttered seductively. Lord Hadrian Black-Brunette-Granger-Slytherin-Gryffindor-Gaunt-Lovegood-Peverell-Potter responded by tying up Luna with a piece of rope, using his dastardly knot tying skills to truss up Lady Luna Lovegood Peverall. He then thrusted a finger into her cunt (they're also all completely nacked) and made the girl squeal.

"Oh Master Lord Hadrian Black-Brunette-Granger-Slytherin-Gryffindor-Gaunt-Lovegood-Peverell-Potter, please let me cum," Lady Luna Lovegood Peverall uttered, in between sucking on Lord Hadrian Black-Brunette-Granger-Slytherin-Gryffindor-Gaunt-Lovegood-Peverell-Potter's THROBBING cock. However, before he could shove his member deeper into her throat, Lady Daphne Greengrass Slytherin entered the cabin.

"Lord Hadrian Black-Brunette-Granger-Slytherin-Gryffindor-Gaunt-Lovegood-Peverell-Potter, there's something urgent you must know!" She shouted with urgency. Then without warning, the Hogwarts express came to a shattering stop, flinging everyone in the room against one wall, the force of which made Lady Luna Lovegood Peverall cum without Lord Hadrian Black-Brunette-Granger-Slytherin-Gryffindor-Gaunt-Lovegood-Peverell-Potter's permission.

I scowled at my slut, knowing she would be punished later, before turning to Lady Daphne Greengrass Slytherin, demanding an explanation.

"Well Lord Hadrian Black-Brunette-Granger-Slytherin-Gryffindor-Gaunt-Lovegood-Peverell-Potter, we had to find some way to grab the reader's attention before the chapter ended."

A/N Athena took one look at the adverbs, and noped the fuck out of editing this one. I can't blame her honestly. I hope you enjoyed the chapter, and the fact that it didn't take over a year for me to write a new one :) Also, the fact that this was published on independence day is absolutely not a coincidence and definitely wasn't just pointed out to me after I uploaded :D