Meeting
There's something unnerving about feeling your heart beat again when it was black and blue. And as I looked into your brown eyes and black curled lashes… Thump. Thump. Thump.
I looked up from my phone to see my boyfriend playing video games on the computer. Again. I really do love him, he makes these funny faces when he plays his games, twisting his mouth in exceptional ways to make sure he gets the perfect… hit? Snipe… I get up to vacuum, it's dusty as hell in this house. I click the plug into the outlet, aaand the power flickers off in the room. Fuck.
I wake up and the lights are on, I'm in my bed again, and he's back on the game. I touch my face and I hiss in pain. He got mad again, huh. I try to cry but my eyes remain sticky with eye boogers and my head pounds me into silence. But there's nothing quiet in here, his fingers on the keys, his shuffle of the mouse, my thoughts screaming.
Laying my head back into the coconut scented pillow, I'm grateful he has headphones on. I don't know and can't tell if he wants me awake yet. My body shivers from the pain pulsing on my temple and cheek. "Why, Howie, why?" I can't bring my voice above a whisper. Partly because it won't happen, and partly because I don't know if he can hear me.
It was a beautiful summer day when I saw you working at the café near my neighborhood. I was opening the door when suddenly, you sprint past me, it looked like you were rushing to your break or lunch or something. You were beautiful. I couldn't help but crack my neck looking at you run past. Still standing dumb-struck like a doorkeeper, holding it wide open still. You said hello to a friend, and took off your hat to let out a gorgeous head of dirty blonde hair. And you smiled. A crooked but jolly smile. And you looked back at me, with those welcoming hazel eyes. Still smiling.
A lady knocked my body back into consciousness, I apologized and went inside. Another day, another double chocolate chip Frappuccino. Pulling a clunky, and loud, and scrapey, did I mention loud? Chair to sit in while I wait for my order, the bells on the door ring. Turning my face instinctually, there you are again. "Howard why are you back here already?" The cashier bellows at you. You laugh and I am still staring, but the bee-line you made towards me made me perk up in my clunky, loud, scrapey, did I mention loud? Seat. "Hi. I'm Howie." You spoke. "Hi, I'm Aurum." My voice not even above a whisper.
In between all of that a few hours go by before I wake up again. I squint to look to the window and it's dark outside. He's next to me in bed breathing deeply, but not asleep. I can see a small light from his phone screen. Dick-cord I guess. I missed his lips on my skin, kissing my cheeks awake. I missed his sweet words in my ears making me blush. Most of all I miss his hands, playing with my hair. I miss you, Howie. Why?
