I do not own Rookie Blue or any of the characters…
Thank you, thank you for all your reviews and for reading of course, and to everyone who favs and follows. I've written more of a note at the end of the chapter in response to reviewers, so check that out. A huge thanks to Snarcasm318 for so generously letting me sound out some ideas with her, and for some great advice.
Apologies for mistakes. Hope you enjoy!
…
As the car hit the water, the Peck training kicked in. Gail braced for the impact, both hands on either side of the steering wheel just as she'd been taught. She could do nothing for Holly except ensure she herself survived so she could get Holly out.
The airbags deployed on impact. Literally in a microsecond. Gail felt herself bouncing forward to hit the nylon balloon, aware Holly was doing the same, except she was still unconscious and her body flopped forward limply like a rag doll. Holly's relaxed state might, at least, save her from further injury, Gail hoped. Almost immediately the bags began to deflate, weirdly at the same rate, or so it seemed to Gail, with which the car was subsiding.
Gail clicked open her seatbelt and pressed the button to unwind her window. Some remote part of her brain was thanking Elaine for drilling her on what to do if your car went into water. She was probably seven and couldn't figure out why this should concern her. Didn't adults drive cars? Wasn't it their job to take control in a situation like that?
'Pecks must always be prepared,' Elaine had admonished, her brow furrowing sternly, 'always ready to serve, any time, anywhere. So?' She arched an eyebrow, waiting and, when Gail didn't respond but instead looked at her truculently, sighed heavily. 'The drill Gail, from the top. What's the drill?'
Gail had recited it like a mantra. 'Seatbelt, windows, children, out.' Other kids learned nursery rhymes – she memorized survival manuals.
'Ten per cent of drowning deaths in Canada occur in submerged cars. Don't you forget that,' Elaine held up a warning finger
The front of the car was sinking fastest, the weight of the engine pulling it down. Already the cabin was starting to fill with the icy lake water. The pressure of the water outside the car made opening the door impossible. Even if Gail could somehow wedge it open even a crack, it would let in a rush of water that could sink the car in ten seconds.
It was a relatively warm day for this time of year, but still it had dropped to zero overnight, and as the water began to rise, reaching her knees, Gail became truly aware of how freezing it was. The cold brought Holly too, her eyes fluttering open and then wavering as if it were an enormous effort to remain conscious. She'd lost her glasses in the crash. It made her face appear more vulnerable, especially given the way she was blinking like a newborn puppy.
'We're getting out of here,' Gail said determinedly, reaching across to unbuckle Holly's seat belt only to find it was jammed. She repeatedly pushed the release button but without success.
The water was coming in faster now. It was up to Holly's waist, and she no longer looked as if she were about to pass out, but instead was gasping from the rush of freezing water. It took one to two minutes for a car to sink. That's what Elaine had told Gail. It didn't take a genius to realize the odds of drowning increased exponentially once the car was fully submerged and the cabin inundated.
Gail looked around for something to use to cut the belt sash but of course there was nothing. She tried yanking hard on the sash but it was stuck fast, pulled taut in the crash, in fact so taut it was lashed tightly against Holly, making it impossible for her to move. At least it was holding her upright. The water was now up to their chests. By Gail's reckoning they had less than a minute before the car sank completely.
'I'm going to dive under the water and unbuckle your seatbelt. If the water reaches your chin, you need to take a really deep breath,' Gail said, 'and then hold onto it as long as you can. Can you do that Holly?'
Holly shook her head weakly.
'It's okay. You can do it,' Gail urged.
'No,' Holly shook her head again, 'you need to get out of here. Save yourself Gail.'
This time it was Gail who was shaking her head, but vigorously. 'I'm not going anywhere without you.'
'I love you Gail,' Holly said, 'being with you,' she paused as if searching for the right words, but there wasn't time, and when Holly spoke again it was urgent but emphatic. 'I feel so blessed to have had what we have. I never dreamed I could love someone this much. But now,' she looked beseechingly at Gail, 'you need to go. Please. If you love me, go.'
…..
'Are you sure this is a shortcut?' Dov grumbled as he rounded another bend in the narrow road.
'Absolutely. Gail showed it to me when we were in uniform. We were called out to a break-in at the rowing club,' Chloe said brightly, 'anyway, you know Gail, she's memorised the quickest route to get anywhere in Toronto. Better than a GPS.'
'Yeah, well I don't see Gail on this road now.'
'What about those cars,' Chloe said as they skirted yet another bend and two cars came into view about a kilometre ahead. 'Oh shit. What about those cars!' she exclaimed as the car at the rear rammed into the one in front, then reversed and surged forward again to hit the car with even greater force. The front car veered off the road, colliding with an embankment and becoming airborne. It hovered over a grassy strip before falling nose first into the lake.
'Chloe call dispatch now,' Dov said, pressing down on the accelerator, 'we need backup and an ambulance.'
'Its Gail's car,' Chloe said, her voice, which was normally so exuberant, small with fear.
…..
Gail took a huge gulp of air, filling her lungs completely, and plunged under the water. It was murky, making it difficult, at first, to locate Holly's seat belt buckle. When she found it, mainly by feel, Gail grasped both sides of the buckle, pulling it back and forward in the hope this would loosen the mechanism. She pressed the release button but nothing happened.
Gail's lungs were starting to burn and she knew she couldn't hold her breath for much longer. She tried pulling on the sash again but it wouldn't budge. Biting back tears of frustration, Gail pushed the release button over and over, the action frenzied and desperate.
It wasn't fair. This couldn't be happening. Not to Holly. There had to be some way of saving her. There had to be. The need for air became too great. Gail's lungs felt like they were about to explode, making what started as a flutter of panic build until she could think only of blindly pushing up out of the water.
She gasped once she hit the surface. In the short time she had been under the water, the pocket of air in the cabin had shrunk dramatically. It was little wider than a foot. Even though Holly had urged Gail to go, to leave her behind in the car, some survival instinct made Holly tilt her head to keep breathing. Still, she was barely managing to keep her head upright and Gail sensed she was close to losing consciousness again.
'Stay with me Holly,' Gail implored.
Holly looked at her glassily but somehow managed to murmur, 'I'm trying but I can't for much longer. Please go, Gail.'
Gail didn't respond. No use telling Holly there was no way in hell she was leaving her down here to die alone. Any moment the cabin would be completely flooded and then there was no hope for either of them. Taking another enormous breath, Gail went back into the water. After her initial reaction to the cold, Gail hadn't really noticed it again. Perhaps it was the adrenaline. Maybe her thermo receptors, the skin cells sensitive to temperature, had taken pity on her and had shut down. Holly would probably know. There was sure to be some science behind it. However, if her thermo receptors were being kind, they stopped as soon as Gail ducked under. She immediately had a kind of brain freeze, like she had eaten ice cream too rapidly, except far worse. The pain was so intense, for a moment she thought she might pass out.
There was a time when she might have given up in a situation like this, resigned to the notion she didn't deserve anything more but that was before Holly. That was before she knew how to love and be loved, hugely, selflessly and to Gail's mind miraculously; before something very much like happiness, or perhaps it should be more rightly described as joy, had stealthily crept into her heart and settled there; before life had ceased being defined by struggle and become full of promise and hope.
Early on, not long after Holly had returned to Toronto, Gail told her therapist Holly made her a better person. Leslie had arched an eyebrow and inquired with deliberate casualness, 'Holly? Or is that down to you? Gail, you work hard to take responsibility for the bad choices you've made, so why not own the good ones?' Gail had twisted her mouth as she considered Leslie's question, not quite ready to accept this reasoning. Sometimes, she truly believed she'd be nothing without Holly. That if Holly hadn't appeared, and then reappeared, she would eventually wind up that sad, sorry old woman, bitter at the opportunities she'd allowed pass by, had in fact rebuffed, and resenting other people's contentment. Just one giant pity party really.
As she sat on Leslie's comfortable couch - so comfortable she sometimes wanted to sink into it - in Leslie's tastefully decorated office - the neutral tones clearly chosen to be soothing - Gail turned these thoughts over and came to a realisation at once startling and yet revelatory in that way that made her certain it was a truth. Holly did give her a reason to be a better person, but Leslie was right, ultimately it was she, Gail, who chose to be her best self. Still, it was Holly who had, in the first place, shown her it was possible, had made her want to be that person.
Even at the very beginning, when their relationship had barely taken off, was in fact about to stutter and flounder because self sabotage was what Gail did best, even then in the midst of that wreckage, Gail had had a glimpse of what could be. From the moment she shut Holly out, Gail had felt the loss of that possibility, had yearned and then grieved for it, even as she stubbornly refused to return Holly's calls. Now as she felt around for the seat belt buckle, Gail knew they deserved more time. She and Holly. Their lives together had only just begun and Gail wasn't ready, wasn't prepared to give that up, to let it go. Not without a fight.
Ignoring the sharp ache in her head and summoning a strength she didn't know she possessed, Gail once more rocked the buckle back and forth but now with greater force, working frantically to loosen it. She pressed the button again. This time, incredibly, miraculously it did release the tongue of the belt. Gail pushed herself upright, desperate for air, wanting to take great lungs full of the stuff, but once she stood the water was nearly covering her mouth and there were mere inches of space between it and the cabin roof. She took a few short breaths and, still heaving, pulled the sash away from Holly's body, catching her as fell forward. Holly's eyes were fluttering and Gail grabbed her under her arms to hold her up.
'I'm going to go out the window and pull you through after me. Just before I pull you out you need to take a huge breath and hold it.'
Holly nodded. It was then that Gail noticed the gash on Holly's forehead. Bleeding steadily. Weirdly, it was in the exact same place as Gail's scar from where Perick had slammed the door into her head. Gripping tightly under Holly's arms, Gail hauled her across to the driver's side of the car so they were both half standing on the seat. The problem was, Gail realized, Holly might not have the strength to stay upright on her own. In the time it took Gail to get free of the car and position herself to manoeuvre her out, Holly might have subsided into the water.
'Hold on to the side of the window frame,' Gail said, 'as tight as you can.' Holly did as instructed. Gail toed off her shoes, thankful she never really bothered with the laces, unclipped her gun and shrugged off her leather jacket. Another one of Elaine's lessons – remove anything that would weigh you down. She didn't ask Holly to do the same, deciding Holly needed to conserve her energy to get out of the car.
Gail kissed Holly on the cheek, just quickly. She took another deep breath and kicked off from the seat and through the window. At least, now the car was nearly submerged, the rush of water coming through the window had eased. Breaking the surface of the water, Gail took another deep breath and, turning quickly, dove back under. Reaching in through the car window, she again put her hands under Holly's arms and guided her out and up. As they pulled free, the lake finally swallowed up the car, the only trace of it a whirlpool of bubbles on the surface of the water.
…..
When she took the call from Chloe, Frankie was standing next to the decapitated head. It had been placed in a plastic bag and dumped rather unceremoniously on the boat ramp belonging to the rowing club. Chris and Duncan, who had responded to the call out, looked up as Frankie swore loudly into the phone.
'Fuck,' she said, heedless of the rowing crew who were giving their statements, 'I'm on my way.' Frankie didn't waste time once she disconnected, issuing rapid-fire instructions to the two officers. 'Moore stay here. Diaz come with me. It's Gail and Holly.'
Chris didn't hesitate. As soon as Frankie said Gail and Holly he moved, following the detective to her car.
'Is it Dr Hart?' he asked as he slid into the passenger seat. Frankie was already putting the car into reverse.
'Don't know. But Chloe said Gail's car was rammed into the lake. She and Dov watched it happen. They're approaching the scene now,' Frankie said as she peeled out of the club parking lot, the car tires squealing as she accelerated.
'What about Gail and Holly?'
'As far as we know, they're still in the car.'
Now it was Chris's turn to swear.
'If Francine Hart is behind this I'm going to shoot her skinny ass,' Frankie said vehemently. ….
…...
Cold incapacitation occurred between five and fifteen minutes of entering freezing water. Gail couldn't remember who had told her that. It sounded like a Holly thing but maybe it was part of her mother's sinking car drill. Already Gail's body was startling to feel sluggish. Her blood vessels would have constricted, decreasing the flow of blood to her extremities in order to preserve heat in her core and so protect vital organs. It made sense – the body going into survival mode - but it didn't help right now if she couldn't make it to shore because her hands and feet were too cold and her muscles refused to move. Holly must have told her that, for sure.
Once they had broken the surface of the water – a feat in itself and Gail was convinced it was sheer willpower as much as anything else that propelled them upwards - Gail looped her arms under Holly's so Holly's back rested against her chest. Then she placed one arm around Holly's waist, and her other hand on Holly's neck to keep her head upright while she towed them through the water. The position allowed Gail to kick with her legs. It was all just as Elaine had instructed, just as Gail had practiced so many times.
Holly seemed to be slipping in and out of consciousness and Gail was relieved there were only about thirty metres between them and the shore, although in her weakened state every metre felt like a kilometre. Once she reached the shallows, Gail dragged Holly the remainder of the way, collapsing onto the little strip of sand at the shoreline.
Every muscle in Gail's body ached. She'd swallowed a good deal of water and was starting to shiver uncontrollably. All she wanted to do was lie there until someone came to rescue them, but that sadly was not an option. For a start, she had to check on Holly. Hauling herself half upright, Gail knelt beside Holly, firstly checking to see if her airways were clear. Holly's chest was rising and falling, although her breaths were shallow. Gail checked her pulse. It was faint. She urgently needed to get help but who would be out on this back road road at this hour?
A sound like shoes crunching on the gritty sand made Gail turn and look up. Maybe they were going to be rescued after all. Maybe it wasn't too much to hope. When Gail saw who it was, all she could think was God how stupid was she? She was so focused on freeing Holly and getting them to dry land, she'd forgotten about the car that forced them off the road and into the lake, or more to the point had forgotten to anticipate its occupant might hang around to finish what they started. Stupid, stupid, stupid, Gail admonished herself, realizing with a surprisingly sharp pang that Elaine would be extremely disappointed in her.
'And I had so hoped I wouldn't have to use this again,' Frank Gimlet said. He was holding one of the Samurai swords loosely by his side. It was still in its casing, so that was one small positive at least. In truth, Gail wasn't surprised to see him. After all she'd had a feeling something was off about him. Cruel and calculating and clearly quite capable of decapitation. What she hadn't expected was to see Patricia Gimlet standing just behind her ex-husband, a tire iron in her hand, her mouth drawn in a mean line.
'I don't known Gimlet, seems to me you relish any excuse to use that,' Gail couldn't help but taunt. 'You'd already given Brierly enough heroin for him to OD, so what was the point of beheading him, except for your sick pleasure.'
If these were the last words she uttered, then Gail would go down swinging. She wasn't being reckless. Plainly there was no hope of pacifying either of the Gimlets, of talking them down. Too late for that now. Gail saw it in their eyes, their expressions identical. Set with a determination both ruthless and amoral. They had come here to murder and nothing, no entreaty, no appeal to their better natures, no bargaining or clever words, would sway them from that purpose.
'I'm going to enjoy killing you, you nosey bitch,' Gimlet said, unsheathing the sword and coming to stand over Gail.
Instinctively, she moved so she was shielding Holly. Gimlet and Patricia wouldn't know who Holly was. Maybe killing Gail would be enough for Gimlet. Given Holly was unconscious, there was a chance he'd leave her be.
'Who's she?' Gimlet said, viciously kicking Holly's leg with the toe of his shoe.
'She has nothing to do with this,' Gail said, trying for all the world not to sound desperate, to appear like she didn't care.
'She's from the forensics lab,' Patricia supplied, 'she's the one I saw beheading the corpse.'
Gimlet smiled, his mouth quirking into a sneer that was pure menace. 'Sweet,' he said, sounding like he thought it anything but, 'protecting your girlfriend. Hard to find loyalty like that these days.'
He raised the sword high above his head. Gail heard the sirens then. A patrol car and an ambulance. She could tell by the sounds. Quite near. The noise distracted Gimlet and he shook his head irritably and looked back uncertainly at his ex wife, all the while keeping the sword above his head.
The whole scene might have been quite comical if Gail hadn't been preoccupied by the very real possibility, well actually probability, she and Holly were about to die. How many times over the last twelve months had Gail found herself in a similar position? Actually, it had started before then with Perick. Policing could be a dangerous occupation, but really what were the odds. Perick, Aaron, Zaheer and now Gimlet. Gail's very own bogeymen. Oh then there was Lucia. Each time she'd walked away. She'd survived. Problem was her luck had to run out sometime. The sirens were getting closer but not close enough to save her or even Holly.
'Police. Back away from Detective Peck and put the sword down slowly.' It was Chloe advancing towards them, with Dov at her side, both with guns drawn. Gail should have been relieved, however sensed Gimlet wouldn't go quietly. She looked up at him warily as he stood unwaveringly, the sword still upraised.
'Back away now or I will fire.' It was Chloe again. Gail had never heard her like this. Angry, her voice low and forceful, leaving no doubt as to the seriousness of her intent.
'And if she doesn't, I will blow your fucking brains out, Gimlet.' It was Frankie who spoke now. She'd come up a different path with Chris, emerging just to the right of Gail and Holly.
Finally, Gimlet took a step back, and then another, dropping the sword on the sand so it landed with a dull thud.
'Thank Christ,' Gail breathed out
….
Several hours had passed since they arrived at the hospital. Holly was unconscious the entire ambulance ride. She had been intubated, the gash on her forehead sutured and both she and Gail were sent off for head scans, which had come back clear. Holly woke briefly and they removed the tube from her throat, which brought on a coughing fit. Gail had hovered by her bed, feeling useless as the doctors and nurses went about attending to Holly with an impressive efficiency.
Gail was supposed to be in bed. There was some talk of hypothermia but now she knew Holly was safe she'd finally stopped shivering. Still, the doctors insisted Gail, as well as Holly, be under observation. Elaine turned up with sweats for both women ('those hospital gowns are so immodest,' she'd tutted) and Holly's spare glasses as well as a pair of Gail's jeans, a hoodie and combat boots.
'I thought I'd bring you day clothes because I know you won't stay in bed,' Elaine said with a sigh, 'best not to have you wandering the hospital looking like a vagrant.'
'I'm surprised you didn't bring me an evening gown,' Gail quipped, nonetheless feeling appreciative.
'I really wish you would give me a key to your place. I had to pick the lock,' Elaine said, ignoring Gail's jibe.
Becca and Kurt arrived next, sweeping Gail into a warm hug. Elaine looked on curiously.
'You kept Holly safe. Thank you,' Becca said quietly, holding on to Gail for a little longer.
'I did my best,' Gail said bashfully.
'Nonsense,' Elaine cut in sharply, 'you are a hero, Gail. If it weren't for your actions Holly would still be trapped in that car beneath the lake.'
Gail winced. She couldn't understand why her mother was being so strident. Staking a claim to this space perhaps? Did she resent Gail's easy relationship with Holly's parents so was asserting her proprietorial rights as Gail's mother? Or was she laying the groundwork for a commendation, maybe even a bravery award. She'd like that. It would probably mean Gail ending up on the news. All in all another fillip for Operation Peck as Gail scathingly referred to Elaine's campaign to manoeuvre the family back into a position of power and influence.
At the mention of Holly being trapped in the car, Becca blanched.
'We got out pretty quickly,' Gail reassured her, touching Becca's forearm lightly, 'we actually weren't in the water too long.'
When two nurses came in to check on Holly, Gail suggested they step out into the waiting area. Holly was still sleeping and Gail figured it was best they didn't disturb her.
'Holly is okay though?' Becca asked once out of the room.
'Yeah, she woke up a little while ago and was able to recite her name and date of birth,' Gail reassured her.
'Plus, I called David Phillips, the head of neurology. He took a look at both Gail and Holly's scans and gave them the all clear,' Elaine said.
'So Holly's in good hands,' Kurt said decisively, clearly hoping this piece of information would ease Becca's fears.
'Absolutely,' Gail smiled.
'But what about you, Gail?' Becca said, tilting her head to one side and creasing her brow in that way Holly did when she was concerned. 'I haven't even asked,' she added apologetically.
'A little sore and tired, but I'm okay.'
'And these people who ran you off the road, they're connected with your investigation?' Kurt asked. As Gail nodded, he said, 'when Sergeant Shaw called, I was sure that doctor, Francine Hart, was responsible. These other two - they've been arrested?
'They are in custody and will be charged,' Elaine answered for Gail. 'Kurt and Becca, why don't we get a coffee in the cafeteria. I can fill you in,' she said, shepherding Holly's parents towards the elevator before they had a chance to reply.
Gail shot her mother a grateful look. She really didn't have the energy to go over what happened just yet. Frankie would be here before long to take her statement, just as soon as she finished interviewing Frank and Patricia Gimlet.
…
The sound of Holly coughing again woke Gail from a light doze. Immediately, she was up out of her chair and by Holly's side.
'Are you okay?' she asked, leaning over cautiously, not wanting to spook Holly, who understandably appeared slightly dazed.
Holly's face, when she finally focused on Gail, registered complete surprise and then confusion. In fact, she did a double take, her head jerking back so violently for an instant Gail had the impression Holly was recoiling from her.
'Where am I?' Holly said, her voice raspy from having had the tube down her throat. As she struggled to sit up, Gail went to her aid.
'In the hospital,' Gail replied slowly. 'You were in an accident, but you're okay now.'
'In an accident?' Holly said, gingerly touching the bandage on her forehead as if testing it were real, her expression caught between alarmed and perplexed. 'But I don't get it,' she frowned in concentration, clearly trying to piece together what happened, 'did you respond to the call out?'
'Um,' Gail hesitated. If Holly had blanked out the accident then Gail probably needed to be careful about what she said. 'Not exactly.'
'But, but,' Holly faltered, clearly trying to figure out Gail's involvement, 'you were at the scene.'
'Um, yeah.'
Holly ran her hand over her face and then winced when she reached the bandage.
'Are you okay,' Gail asked worriedly, 'should I call the nurse. Do you need pain meds or something?'
Holly shook her head slowly. 'It's not that,' she started to say, then stopped and peered at Gail intently as if confirming, just like with the bandage, she was real.
'I've got your spare glasses,' Gail said, the intensity of Holly's gaze making her remember the spectacles.
'Why are you being so kind, Gail?' Holly said with wonder, her question not the least bit accusatory. 'I don't get it,' she looked around the room, 'is it, is this a dream?'
'Really, you think I'm only nice to you in your dreams?' Gail started to quip but Holly interrupted.
'But what are you doing in San Francisco?'
'Holly, we're in Toronto,' Gail blurted out, so taken aback by Holly's question she forgot about treading carefully.
'Why would I be in Toronto. You're in Toronto. I can't be in Toronto,' Holly said as if that settled everything,
Now it was Gail's turn to be bewildered. Holly was clearly disoriented. The doctors hadn't warned her, but Gail imagined memory loss might be normal after a concussion. Maybe she should get a doctor or nurse in here. 'Holly,' she began very gently but Holly spoke over her.
'I'm here. You're there. We can't be in the same place,' Holly reasoned, 'maybe this isn't real after all.'
'Holly,' Gail began once more, drawing out Holly's name, her tone placatory.
Oh,' Holly interrupted again as if struck by sudden understanding. It momentarily reassured Gail that was until Holly spoke again. 'Oh, I'm visiting.'
'Holly, what year is it?'
'2014,' Holly said without hesitation.
'And where do you live?'
'San Francisco,' Holly started to say but then trailed off. 'Gail, why are you asking me these questions? It's not,' Holly hesitated, 'it's not 2014 is it?'
Gail bit her lip and shook her head slowly.
'Oh. Okay then,' Holly nodded very slowly. It was clearly not okay. Gail could tell Holly was fighting hard not be flustered. This was a woman who liked to be in control of facts, to draw from them a logical conclusion, and that was definitely not happening here. Nothing was adding up. 'Okay,' Holly said again, taking a deep breath to calm herself, 'obviously, I have amnesia. What year is it and why am I in Toronto?'
Gail pursed her lips, hesitating herself before speaking. 'January 2017. You moved back to Toronto nearly a year ago. You're the deputy chief of forensics.'
'Oh,' Holly said and then 'oh' again as she absorbed this information. 'I've lost three years.' She looked up at Gail 'I came back for the job?'
'Yeah,' Gail drew out the word, 'and-.' She stopped.
'And?
'To be with me,' Gail found herself saying shyly, unaccountably nervous. What if Holly or this version of her from 2014 didn't want that? Didn't like the idea of them being together? What if she hated Gail for breaking her heart, for breaking up and not coming to San Francisco and for telling Holly she couldn't maintain contact, that it was best if they didn't speak or email or text.
'We're together?' Holly asked with what was either surprise or wonder. In her current state of agitation, Gail couldn't tell. She bit her lip again and nodded.
'Like together together. In a relationship together? Girlfriends,' Holly said.
'Yep,' Gail popped the 'p'. Now it was coming. Holly was going to tell her it was a huge mistake.
'You're kidding me. Really?'
'Yep,' Gail said again, wishing she could be more articulate, in this moment especially.
'Really,' Holly said, her face breaking out in the broadest smile. 'This isn't a dream? Really. That's,' she paused, 'is it weird to be sitting in a hospital bed with a bandage on my forehead and a splitting headache feeling so incredibly happy?'
Gail grinned. Okay, that was not the reaction she had expected.
…...
'Short-term memory loss is not uncommon when a patient sustains a head wound such as Holly's. The traumatic nature of her ordeal may have also contributed to her amnesia,' Dr Phillips explained.
He was a genial man with a calm and confident manner. Slightly grizzled grey hair. Probably a curly mop when he was younger, Gail decided, but now it was receding, he wore it short.
'Will she regain it?' Kurt asked.
'Well, it's hard to say for sure, but it's likely Holly's mind as well as her body needs rest. It's amazing how restorative sleep can be. Once she's had a chance to really rest, she may recover her memory.'
'And if she doesn't?' Becca asked.
'Let's cross that bridge if we come to it,' the neurosurgeon said kindly, 'in the meantime we'll monitor Holly. I'm afraid it is very much a waiting game.'
'Do we need to pretend it's 2014?' Gail said, 'or will it help if we tell Holly about her life now.'
'I'd be definitely telling her about her life now. It may prod her to remember. But try and be as normal as possible around Holly.'
…..
Gail could hear Holly before she reached her room. Not quite yelling, but her voice was raised and she sounded angry. 'Get out,' she was saying, 'get out. I don't want you anywhere near me.'
Thinking it could be Francine - she worked here at the hospital after all - Gail broke into a run. When she'd last left Holly's room, Holly was falling back asleep. It was right after Dr Phillips examined her. This, plus the realization she'd forgotten a whole three years of her life, understandably had taken a toll. Coming into the room, Gail didn't find Francine but another doctor standing at the end of Holly's bed.
'Holly,' Lisa was saying, wheedling really, 'I thought we'd put that behind us. You know, moved on.'
'Moved on? Moved on,' Holly said contemptuously, 'easy for you to say given you're incapable of loving anyone but yourself. But fine, I'll just walk away from the only person I ever really thought I could love.'
'I don't understand why you're dwelling on this now,' Lisa's brow was furrowed with genuine confusion, 'and what do you mean walk away? Gail's actions just saved your life.'
'Saved my life,' Holly exploded, 'are you such an elitist bitch you think by driving Gail away you what, helped me dodge a bullet? I've put up with a lot of shit from you Lisa, but I don't think I can forgive you for this.'
'Um, I had a hand in it too, Holly,' Gail ventured as she moved into the room, 'It wasn't entirely Lisa's fault. I could have returned your calls. I could have told you how I was feeling. Instead, I was a brat and shut you out. Anyway, I was so messed up, if it wasn't Lisa, something else would have triggered me to run.'
So you're talking to me now, Gail,' Holly said coolly. It reminded Gail of that day in the lab when she had come bearing the thumb and Holly had been so remote and cold, determined not to yield to Gail. Which was fair enough. Holly had believed in Gail. Had trusted her. And what had Gail done? She'd run up a tree. So it made sense that Holly was hurt and angry, but mostly hurt, as Gail would discover. Later, much later, Holly told Gail all she really wanted to do that day was pull Gail close and not let her go. There was a good chance this was exactly what Holly was thinking right now, Gail thought as she tried to decide how best to respond to Holly.
'Are you guys having a fight?' Lisa said, still looking confused, 'is that what this is about.'
Holly sighed heavily, not bothering to answer Lisa, 'what are you even doing here, Gail?'
'What the hell is going on, Gail?' Lisa asked irritably before Gail had a chance to reply.
Ignoring Lisa, Gail looked directly at Holly. 'Remember I was here when you woke up before. You've been in an accident. It caused some memory loss. You think it's 2014 but it's actually 2017 and you live in Toronto-'
'With you,' Holly broke in, her face softening.
'You remember?' Gail asked hopefully.
'No, but I remember you telling me when I woke up before.'
'Well, believe it or not, you've forgiven Lisa. I even talk to her now. She's dating a cop herself, admittedly a white shirt, and she keeps trying to organise double dates with us.'
'So tazing yourself in the eye isn't an option anymore?' Holly smiled.
Gail laughed. 'That wasn't my finest moment, Holly.'
'You've changed,' Holly said, a note of wonder creeping into her voice, 'you-'
'I grew up, Holly.'
'So now you're mature and all,' Holly arched an eyebrow provocatively, 'does that mean I can't ask you to taze Lisa, you know as a special favor to me. Seeing as I am your girlfriend. Just a low voltage. Just enough to make her hair stand on end.'
'I said I grew up, I didn't say I'd matured completely, and you are my girlfriend after all,' Gail grinned wickedly and Holly smirked.
'Oh my god, you two,' Lisa burst out, 'you are never going to let me forget that night at the Penny.'
…..
After Lisa left, Holly's parents returned.
'Did you guys fly over especially?' Holly asked happily.
'Ah, we've been in Toronto a couple of weeks, Holly,' Kurt explained gently.
'A couple of weeks!' Holly exclaimed. She turned and looked at Gail, 'you didn't tell me I'd been out that long.'
'No. Just a few hours. Kurt and Becca have moved back here. They live in a house just round the corner from us.'
'Oh.'
'Yes, Gail helped us find it,' Becca beamed.
'Oh, okay,' Holly started to nod but then stopped. 'Wait, Kurt you aren't exactly enamoured with the police. Remember that lecture you gave about the police as instruments of state oppression. The coercive arm of governments which are becoming increasingly authoritarian and autocratic'
'Yeah Kurt. I'd like to hear that lecture,' Gail teased.
'I wasn't referring to Canada,' Kurt said in his defence.
Holly beckoned to Gail and, as Gail bent down, said in a stage whisper, 'Becca and Kurt have a healthy disrespect for authority.'
'Good thing it's healthy,' Gail kidded, 'I won't need to arrest them.'
'Gail,' Holly hissed, 'you can't say that when they're standing right here. You want them to like you, at least I want them to like you. It's important. Wait, do they know we're dating?'
'Holly, we adore Gail,' Becca gushed, 'she's part of the family now. Don't tell Kurt, but,' Becca lowered her voice conspiratorially, 'Gail's going to teach me how to shoot.' Kurt raised his eyebrows good-naturedly, because of course he had heard what Becca said, and of course he knew about this plan she'd hatched with Gail.
'But I wish you'd two would hurry up and give us grandchildren. I mean, your father and I aren't getting any younger,' Becca continued, her voice returning to a normal level.
'Oh,' Holly worried at her lip, 'this isn't some kind of alternate universe is it?'
…
'I was supposed to come to a family dinner at your house, but Gail and I broke up,' Holly told Elaine, 'at least I think we did. She's not talking to me.'
Elaine arched an eyebrow. 'Is that right? She often doesn't talk to me either. I've always found if you wait it out, Gail gets over it.'
'Not this time. I think she really means it,' Holly said, wiping away a small tear which had leaked out of the corner of her eye, 'I'm not even sure what went wrong.'
'Why don't you tell me everything, dear. I am her mother after all so I can help you figure out what's going on in that head of hers.' Elaine's voice was soft and understanding but her expression was the wolfish one she often wore in an interrogation when a suspect was on the point of cracking
'As if,' Gail scoffed from the doorway of the hospital room. She was standing with her hands on her hips and a look of incredulity on her face. Really, her mother was using Holly's amnesia to pump her for information about why she and Gail broke up three years ago. 'I think you forgot to bring your thumb screws, mother.'
'Gail, I'm not interrogating Holly,' Elaine sighed.
'Yeah, well if you want to know why we broke up, you just needed to ask. I was an idiot. I hurt Holly. I had a lot of shit I needed to sort out.'
'No. It wasn't just you,' Holly broke in, 'I should have known it was too soon to introduce you to Lisa. She can be an elitist asshole, sorry Superintendent. I wasn't just having fun. I thought that was obvious. I mean, I dragged you into an interrogation room when Ford was on the loose, I sat at the hospital with you when your friends were shot and I saved you from your drunken haircut. I thought it was clear how I felt.'
'To anyone else.' Gail, who hadn't advanced into the room, pushed her finger in the doorjamb and twisted it around, feeling vulnerable and uncomfortable about the Penny incident all over again. 'But, you know me-'
'You went up that tree.'
Gail nodded numbly.
'You thought I was just like all the others. Why would I bother with all those texts and calls if I wasn't serious about you.'
'I know, I know. I was a brat. It was stupid, but no one sticks around, not until you. It seemed easier to run before I got hurt.'
'Oh,' Holly frowned, 'this is so messed up. And now I think I have another girlfriend. Well, I'm dating someone. It was Lisa's idea. Best way to get over someone is to get a leg over someone,' Holly stopped, suddenly conscious of Elaine's presence. 'Sorry, Superintendent. Lisa's words.'
'I've never found that to be very sound advice,' Elaine said.
'Yeah,' Holly agreed, 'I'm not even sure I like this girl very much. She's not-' Holly broke off.
'She's not Gail,' Elaine said, sounding surprisingly empathetic. She had been watching the exchange between the two women keenly. No secrets now, Gail thought, knowing her mother was sure to grill her about the interrogation room and the haircut at a later date.
Holly nodded and looked down at her hands as if a little embarrassed she'd revealed this much.
'You do have a girlfriend,' Gail said, coming into the room properly now, 'and it's me. Remember, Holly it's not 2014. You were in an accident. It's 2017.'
When Holly looked up at Gail she was frowning like she didn't quite get it. Then she pushed her glasses back up her nose, bit the inside of her lip and narrowed her eyes a little, just like she always did when puzzling out a conundrum. Holly's concentrating face, Gail called it, and teased her because there was something of the mad professor about it. 'Oh, oh of course,' Holly finally said as if it all suddenly made complete sense. She gave Gail a huge smile and then turned to Elaine. 'So why did you let me think it was 2014, Elaine?' she asked sharply.
Elaine, at least, had the decency to blush. Just a little, but enough so Gail and Holly noticed. Busted, Gail thought, that was so an interrogation. Still, at some point she was going to have to thank Elaine for insisting she learn all those drills.
….
'There's no point taking Holly's statement just now,' Gail said gloomily, 'she thinks it 2014.'
Amnesia?' Frankie asked and Gail nodded. They were sitting in a little room, just off the waiting area, normally reserved for patient's families. 'It's temporary isn't it?'
Gail shrugged despondently, 'we hope.'
'So 2014? Before or after you two split?'
'After. About the time she moved to San Francisco. Although she got confused talking to Elaine and thought it right after I stopped talking to her.'
'Holly wouldn't be the first person to find talking to your mother confusing,' Frankie quipped, 'man that's kind of fucked up but funny too. Is Holly really pissed with you? That I gotta see.'
'Yeah it's hilarious, Anderson,' Gail rolled her eyes, 'Holly's sort of sad and then happy when I tell we're together.'
'Well, that's good isn't it. What if her 2014 self decided she wanted nothing to do with you.'
'Don't joke. I'm still waiting for that penny to drop.'
'Not going to happen, Gail,' Frankie said firmly, 'remember when you and Holly got back together after the Chicago conference, Chloe said you two were inevitable. She's right you know.'
Gail blew out a breath. 'So the statement.'
'Your statement should be enough for now. Gimlet and Patricia have admitted running you and Holly off the road.'
'Really. I thought they'd be real hard asses. Give up nothing.'
'It took awhile,' Frankie admitted, 'but they cracked when I intimated each was framing the other.'
'Basic move. Criminals are idiots.'
'Yep. Plus we found the rest of Brierly's body in a freezer in Patricia Gimlet's garage. That gave us a certain amount of leverage.'
'I bet,' Gail grinned, 'these two get stupider and stupider.'
'Rodney and Natasha are combing through the house now. What's the bet the Samurai sword Gimlet was waving about comes back as a match for the weapon used to decapitate Brierly.'
'So was the motive protecting the company?'
'Yep. Once again it's all about greed. Brierly and Damien came to Patricia with evidence of the animal cruelty thinking she'd help them expose Gimlet. She pretended to be on their side but contacted Gimlet immediately.'
'Protecting her stake in the company came first.'
'Indeed. It was she who came up with the plan to kill Brierly by giving him an overdose. She invited him to her house on the pretext of discussing what was happening at EquanimityPlus. She and Gimlet planned on dumping him in an alley and leaving him there to die, but he ODed at her house before they had a chance to move him. Gimlet had the bright idea to behead him. Supposedly to frame the animal liberationists who protested outside EquanimityPlus. Thought we might make a connection with the fake guillotine they set up.'
'You sure he wasn't just looking for an excuse to use the sword.'
'Wouldn't rule it out. Blood lust certainly seems like a thing for him.'
'Yeah, if you guys hadn't turned up when you did, Rodney might now be autopsying my head,' Gail shuddered, 'why did he and Patricia come after Holly and me?'
'They got it in their heads, no pun intended, you'd figured out the whole thing.'
'But that's plain dumb. If I had figured it out, at the very least I would have told you and Chloe and Dov. Were they planning on killing you three as well.'
'Who knows, as you say criminals are stupid,' Frankie shrugged, 'maybe they were overtaken by murdering madness.'
Gail and Frankie had talked about this before. How murder could drive you over the edge. Gail called it the madness of murder. For some murderers, it was like the act of taking someone's life induced a psychosis, made them paranoid and illogical and liable to act recklessly. Holly had joked Gail should try to convince the Association of Psychiatrists to add it to its list of recognised mental illnesses. Counterproductive, Gail pronounced, pointing out that if it made murderers do stupid things then they were easier to catch.
'What about Damien? Shit, that wasn't his head out by the lake?'
'No, that I believe is the head Holly was practicing on last night. Natasha recognised it.'
'One of the Gimlets got into the morgue?' Gail asked.
'Yep,' Frankie nodded, 'Patricia and it was alarmingly easy. She deliberately bumped into Dr Wilson on his way out of the elevator and swiped his pass. As you know, because of cutbacks, a security guard only patrols the morgue at night. Seems Patricia saw Holly decapitating the corpse and decided to use it to lure the two of you out to the lake.'
'And we holding hands when we left the morgue.'
'And she figured you were together. Decided killing you both was the only option.'
'I had this feeling we were being watched when we left the morgue last night, but when I looked around I couldn't see anyone. Figured I was jumpy because of Francine. But seeing Holly slice off that head must have made Patricia even more convinced we were on to her.'
'Yeah, well you pretty much had figured it out,' Frankie said.
'I never imagined Patricia would be working with Gimlet,' Gail shook her head, 'so how did they plan on silencing Damien?'
'Gimlet said he believed he could reason with his son and swears he never had any intention of killing him.'
'But the fact Damien is in hiding suggests otherwise.'
'I'd say he's in fear for his life but hopefully he'll come forward now. Especially as your mother has a press conference scheduled for an hour's time. She plans on detailing the arrests and your heroics.'
'Oh man,' Gail groaned, 'can you stop her. Please.'
'And keep my job. Not likely.'
…..
'I've seen you before,' Holly said to Frankie, 'you tried to pick me up at a conference in Chicago.'
That would be right, Gail thought, Holly would remember Frankie. She recalled nothing from the last three years except meeting Frankie. Still, the fact she remembered anything at all was progress Gail supposed, yet couldn't help feel a little begrudging.
'Frankie used a really cheesy pick-up line, that's why I remember I guess,' Holly said, as if she knew what Gail was thinking.
'Yeah,' Gail said, suddenly interested.
'We probably don't need to revisit that,' Frankie hedged.
'No, no. This I want to hear,' Gail said with glee.
'Frankie asked what someone so beautiful was doing in a dive like that and offered to transport me to a much better place.'
Gail grinned wickedly. Of course she'd heard this story before. Holly had told her how she'd looked at Frankie and then at her bowl of granola and berries and yogurt and then back at Frankie as though seriously weighing her options and then said she'd pass because her breakfast was more appealing. When she heard this, Gail decided Holly must have been momentarily channeling her, but Holly said it Frankie's conceitedness had rubbed her up the wrong way.
'She was speaking metaphorically of course, when she promised to take you to a higher plane,' Gail said now.
'That was the sense I got.'
'I am still here you know,' Frankie scowled, 'and I was way smoother than that.'
'Ha, sounds better than the line she used on me about giving women the best sex on their lives,' Gail said, ignoring Frankie.
'Frankie hit on you?' Holly sounded surprised but then screwed up her face, 'that's right you two slept together or are sleeping together.'
'Were, did,' Gail said hurriedly.
'In the past,' Frankie agreed.
'Very, very much in the past!' Gail flapped a hand about as if trying to indicate the passage of time. 'Although in September 2014, which is where you're stuck, it was in the future but it's so so past now. Completely not a thing. Ancient history.'
Holly tilted her head to one side.
'What?' Gail said, realising she was making an idiot of herself.
'I know,' Holly smiled, 'you told me at the conference.'
'You remember the conference,' Gail said excitedly.
'I remember we had a lot of sex. Like really, really hot sex.'
Gail felt herself coloring. Dammit, she shouldn't be embarrassed but now Frankie was staring at her with a big knowing smirk on her face. Gail had still to exact a proper revenge on Frankie and Rodney for betting on whether she and Holly had sex that night. 'Uh Holly, is it normal to lose your filter when you have amnesia.'
'I haven't heard that,' Holly started to say, 'oh, am I'm being too candid. I just thought you'd want me to tell you everything I remembered, and I gotta tell you, Gail, that I remember.'
…
'I had a dream,' Holly said. She'd woken from another short nap. Being constantly reminded she had forgotten three years seemed to exhaust her. 'We were on the run. You were a secret agent or something.'
'Really,' Gail said with interest, sitting up straight in her chair, a little like an overeager child. 'Was I badass?'
Holly laughed. 'What do you think?'
'I was totally badass,' Gail said, 'I'd be a very cool secret agent.'
'Don't even think about it,' Holly shook her head, 'I worry enough about you being in uniform and out on patrol.'
'Um Holly, I'm a detective now.'
'A detective! Really! We should celebrate.'
'Um Holly, it happened over a year ago. You know, before we got together again.
'Oh, and I guess you celebrated with Frankie.'
Gail could tell Holly was trying to keep the edge out of her voice, trying to sound unconcerned by the thought of Gail marking this milestone with the brash detective, but failing.
'We had a few drinks at the Penny that night, yeah, but then I went home because the only person I wanted to celebrate with wasn't there. Every time something momentous happened – good or bad, I wanted to tell you. That night, on the way home I went and broke it off with Olivia because it wasn't fair she wasn't the first person I thought about when something big happened.'
How many times had Gail reached for her phone to dial Holly or composed an email she didn't send. How many times had she found herself, thinking I should tell Holly, Holly would get a kick out of hearing that. It wasn't just the triumphs, or the tragedies like Steve's betrayal; no it was little things too. A particularly stupid suspect, a tricky case, which was only solved with some even trickier forensic science.
'Olivia was your girlfriend?' Holly asked gently. When Gail nodded, she said a little wistfully, 'was she nice.'
'Yeah. You've met her and you like her. Probably too sweet for me, but she cared about me and maybe it could have worked if I could have got over you.'
'Oh Gail,' Holly sighed, 'we are such idiots.'
'But idiots who love each other.'
'You love me?' Holly said, seemingly surprised by Gail's admission.
'Well, yeah,' Gail said, frowning and trying to sound off-hand, like it wasn't a big deal. She was so used to telling Holly she loved her, it had just slipped out. What if Holly found this information overwhelming? What if her 2014 self wasn't ready to hear this, or worse still, didn't feel the same way about Gail.
'Really, you love me,' Holly's voice was gathering excitement and she was fighting to suppress a grin without much success. 'You love me.' She stopped and then said, 'wait you've told me that already haven't you?'
'Many times,' Gail nodded, still looking solemn and despite Holly's grin, still unsure about her reaction.
'I love you, I can't tell you how much because the way I love you is huge,' Holly said earnestly, 'I can't quantify it. But I love you. You know that, don't you? I must have told you.'
Gail nodded again, smiling now, in fact unable to stop the grin spilling over her face.
'Would it be okay to kiss you,' Holly asked, 'I really feel like I want to kiss you right now.'
'Very okay. You know you don't have to ask,' Gail said. She moved from her chair and sat on the bed so she was facing Holly. It was Gail who leaned in, placing the softest of kisses on Holly's lips. Holly smiled into the kiss, her lips quirking with a happiness Gail found infectious. It must be weird for Holly, waking up thinking she and Gail were over, that they weren't talking, let alone touching or kissing, and then finding the complete opposite to be true. It was no wonder she had asked permission.
'Who said it first?' Holly asked pulling back, 'I bet it was you.'
'Um yeah,' Gail said, drawing out the yeah and flushing and feeling annoyed with herself for being so self-conscious. It was just she had hoped to say it that first time in a much more romantic setting and in a much more considered manner than crying out as Holly trust her fingers inside her, the two of them standing in the bath tub with the shower water trickling down their bodies. .
'So describe it to me. Maybe it will help me remember. When did you say it.'
'Well. I kind of said it without thinking.'
Holly titled her head to one side. She was smiling but her expression was quizzical. 'Without thinking?'
'It was an unguarded moment. I wasn't quite myself.'
'Oh,' Holly said understanding, 'oh okay. We were having sex.'
Gail made a rueful face. 'It wasn't very romantic. We were in the shower.'
'That is kind of romantic. I mean, we have a thing for showers,' Holly smiled encouragingly.
'True, I guess, and I meant it. It wasn't just because, you know.'
'Because?' Holly arched an eyebrow teasingly.
'You have some talents, Stewart. I'm surprised you don't have women lining up to confess their love,' Gail said, recovering some of her sass.
'Ha. I don't think anyone is quite as appreciative of my talents as you,' Holly laughed as she put air quotes around the word talent.
'What talents are we talking about?' It was Lisa who spoke. She was standing at the door. Trust her to walk in right at this moment, Gail thought, trying not to roll her eyes but without much success. Holly's lips twitched just a little. Given Holly had barely acknowledged Lisa, Gail got the distinct impression she was amused by Gail's reaction.
'Ugh, are you two making out already,' Lisa said on noticing how close the two women were sitting, Holly with her arms draped around Gail's shoulders.
Holly dropped her smile. 'Lisa,' she said stiffly, 'impeccable timing as always.' Now it was Gail's turn to be amused, and she found her lips quirking in much the same way as Holly's had just before.
'You're not going to throw things at me are you, Holly. I brought Rachel,' Lisa huffed.
With that, Rachel popped out from behind Lisa, holding an enormous bunch of flowers. Christmas lilies – huge trumpet shaped flowers with their pure white petals offset by yellow stamens - dramatic yet somehow elegant, their fragrance exquisite and sweet. Holly's face relaxed and she was smiling once more, one of her warm, wide smiles.
'How come I don't get that kind of welcome?' Lisa complained.
'Because Rachel tells me – ' Holly stopped and then corrected herself – 'told me to keep trying with Gail.'
'Okay, okay. I misjudged Peck. I realize that now. But am I going to have to apologise for that for the rest of my life?'
Holly's face as she regarded Lisa was unreadable but then Gail saw the smallest glint of mischief, or was it evil. Holly smiled again but it was nothing like the smile she gave Rachel. There was nothing welcoming about it. No, it was like the fake smile Gail had perfected, saccharine and yet devoid of any sincerity or warmth. If Holly were completely stuck in 2014 there was no way she'd be looking at Lisa like that, Gail thought. In the brief period they dated before Holly went to San Francisco, there hadn't been enough time for Holly to master that expression, or even have occasion to attempt it.
In fact, it was only a few weeks back, after a particularly unedifying encounter with Jen Luck, that Holly had replicated the smile Gail had given the officer from 27 (which, as Gail intended, sent Jen on her way). The two of them had fallen about laughing. 'Oh my god, you nailed it,' Gail said, 'do I really look at people like that, like they're imbeciles.' Holly had nodded.
Now Holly was nodding again but slowly, that smile still fixed on her face. 'Yep, Lisa. I don't think you've completely paid your dues yet.'
And yep, Gail thought, no matter how playful, that was a taunt of a woman who'd spent the last year in a relationship with her. It cheered her a little because it just might mean the last three years were in there somewhere.
…..
After Rachel and Lisa left, Holly went back to sleep and Gail found herself drifting off. She woke to see Gemma Lister at the foot of Holly's bed going through Holly's chart.
'Is everything alright,' Gail whispered.
'Yeah, all good. I'm supposed to be checking on you too.'
'I'm fine,' Gail said dismissively.
'That I find hard to believe. I was told you pulled Dr Stewart out of the water. That you saved her life.'
Gail shrugged once more like it didn't mean anything.
'When I came on shift and heard about it, I thought maybe Dr Hart was responsible.'
'No, it was two other psychos who also had it in for us,' Gail said drily.
'At least you can joke about it, I guess,' Gemma said. She hesitated as if unsure and then said, 'you know that Dr Hart has gone AWOL. She didn't show for work yesterday or this morning and she's not answering her phone.'
…..
'Dr Hart's disappearance may have nothing to do with Holly or you,' Fiona Vincent reassured Gail. 'She is about to be deregistered as a medical practitioner. I intended telling Holly that at the meeting we had scheduled for this morning.'
'So what did she do?' Gail asked. She was once again in the little family room. At this rate, they'd be commandeering it as an outpost of 15.
'Talked a patient into a very risky procedure which left him paralysed.'
'That's not good but it's hardly a sackable offence.'
'It is when you're sleeping with the patient's wife. Apparently Dr Hart used the wife to coerce the patient. Had the procedure succeeded, it would have made Francine Hart something of a rock star.'
'Well, that fits. She's an attention seeker.'
'And there's more. When the operation failed, the wife broke it off with Dr Hart. The doctor then started stalking her. Left harassing messages. The woman filed a complaint with police and took out a restraining order. That's when Dr Hart transferred here to Toronto.'
'But given her history, why did this hospital agree to the transfer?' Gail furrowed her brow. Sometimes employers got sloppy when it came to background checks or paperwork went missing, but this hospital had a good reputation.
'She got good references from the hospital in San Francisco. I suspect they were relieved to see her go. A transfer meant they could wash their hands of her. Dr Hart's case hadn't come before the medical board and Toronto General didn't see a need to do a police check.'
'Shit,' Gail exhaled, 'what do we do now?'
'When Holly's up to it, she should make a statement so we can lay formal charges. I suspect Dr Hart has gone to ground. Possibly left the city if not the country, so with any luck she may not bother you and Holly again.'
'Yeah, right, ' Gail said a little bitterly, 'if we're lucky. You know, Holly has no memory of the last three years. You might be waiting awhile for that statement.'
'I'm sorry Gail,' Fiona's manner, which up to now had been brisk, softened, 'I spoke to Lisa about it. She said short-term memory loss is not uncommon following a blow to the head and there's every chance Holly will recover her memory.'
'Yeah, well,' Gail bit her lip and looked down at her hands. For some reason, Fiona's words, the shift from officiousness to compassion, made Gail feel vulnerable. She had been strong all day but now, now she was exhausted. She ached all over and her mind and body felt strung out, literally stretched thin, and she had reached the point of endurance. Which was not how a Peck was supposed to react in these situations. No, Pecks were meant to be resilient, stoic until the very end.
In truth, all she wanted to do was go home and lie in Holly's arms, draw comfort from her calm strength, and not think about the fact that both of them, but Holly especially, had almost died. She felt tears pricking at her eyes and dug her fingernails into her palms, determined not to cry in front of Fiona.
'Gail, the good news is the investigation into your conduct has finally been dropped. The Commissioner was satisfied with my preliminary findings which completely exonerated you.'
The Commissioner. Gail knew the top brass had insisted on the inquiry but hadn't realized the complaint had gone that far. Fiona stood and Gail nodded numbly, and then croaked out a 'thanks.'
'Don't thank me. You did nothing wrong. You should never have been under investigation in the first place,' Fiona said, then smiled, 'but if you quote me on that, I'll deny it. I want to keep my job.'
Gail mustered a small smile.
'And Gail, if there's anything I can do,' Fiona said, looking as if she were about to put her hand on Gail's shoulder and then reconsidering. Gail figured Fiona was put off by the look of alarm on her face. She still hated being touched, well except by Holly.
After Fiona left, Gail sat in the little room for a few more minutes. What if Holly didn't regain her memory? Would it be a terrible thing? Would the weight of not knowing take it's toll? Eat away at Holly. Would Holly resent the fact that Gail knew all these things about them, about their relationship and their history, which she did not?
'Overthinking,' came a voice from the doorway. It was Becca, looking concerned but with Holly's warm, lop-sided smile, 'Kurt and I are about to go home and Holly's asking for you.'
When Gail stood, Becca drew her into a hug. Okay, maybe there were two people she didn't mind touching her. This was the second hug Becca had given her today and it felt alright. In fact more than alright. It was comforting and steadying and it calmed Gail and made her realize she didn't have to face this alone. That she and Holly had family and friends, a whole community, who were here for them, who'd already rallied around, had checked on them and made sure they were alight. Even Elaine in her peculiarly imperious way. Chris and Dov and Frankie and Chloe who'd got there in time, Chloe so angry Gimlet would dare threaten Gail and Holly, and quite prepared to shoot him had he not dropped his weapon.
'It will be okay, Gail. I know it,' Becca said, releasing Gail from the hug and Gail allowed herself to believe her.
….
'I kind of wish it was 2014,' Kurt mused, 'then Obama would still be President and David Bowie would still be alive.' He and Becca were on their way out. It was dark outside now and both Holly and Gail were flagging.
'And Leonard Cohen and Prince,' Becca said.
'And Carrie Fisher,' Holly said.
'Trust you, nerd,' Gail smiled, knowing from first hand experience Holly could recite great swathes of dialogue from the Star Wars films, 'I bet you had a thing for Princess Leia.'
'No, I always preferred blondes.'
'Wait a minute,' Gail said excitedly, 'Carrie Fisher only died last month.'
'Uh, it's hardly a thing to get excited about, Gail,' Holly said.
'No, no. It was terrible, but it only happened last month and you remembered. That's a good sign, right?'
'I guess. It could be,' Holly agreed.
After Kurt and Becca left, Gail decided to get ready for bed. The room had two beds, something it transpired Elaine had insisted upon, knowing Gail was unlikely to leave Holly's side. As she changed into her sweats, Gail heard Holly give a little gasp. She swung around in alarm. 'Are you okay?'
Holly blushed and lowered her eyes shyly. 'I just forgot how gorgeous you are,' she admitted.
'Really, you forgot all this hotness,' Gail teased, raising an eyebrow exaggeratedly in parody of someone trying to be sultry and sexy.
Holly laughed. 'No. That would be impossible. I just forgot I was allowed to see you like that.' She waved her hand in Gail's direction.
'Like what? Naked? Do you need me to give you another show,' Gail shimmied her hips, and picking up the corner of her t-shirt, began to slowly peel it upwards.
'No stop,' Holly laughed again, 'the nurses will probably walk in and we'll be thrown out.'
'Worse things than being evicted from a hospital.' Gail dropped her hold on the t-shirt.
'I know you hate hospitals,' Holly said sympathetically, 'but they should discharge us in the morning. No reason to keep us here. My headaches gone.'
'Yeah,' Gail agreed, wondering if the doctors would release Holly if she hadn't recovered her memory but not wanting to voice that fear. She turned her back on Holly and started pulling back the covers on her bed.
'Gail,' Holly said, her voice tentative, even a little diffident, 'can you sleep here with me. I just want to hold you.'
….
In the morning, Gail woke to find Holly smiling at her. They both had their arms wrapped around each other and their legs comfortably tangled. Given the events of yesterday, Gail felt remarkably refreshed. Her body was still stiff but the aches had disappeared. She smiled back at Holly.
'You saved my life,' Holly said.
'Is that what everyone's been telling you,' Gail hedged.
'No. I remember. I was trapped in the car and it was freezing and water was pouring in and you wouldn't leave me. You kept going under the water to unfasten my seat belt and then next thing you were pulling me free.'
'You remember all that,' Gail asked, deciding now was not the best time to tell Holly about Gimlet and the sword, 'do you know what year it is?'
'2017. I remember everything. I know I couldn't yesterday but now I do. I remember finding you again and coming back here to Toronto, to you. And I remember how brave you were yesterday, how you wouldn't leave me. How you saved me.'
'I could never leave you,' Gail kissed Holly tenderly on the lips, 'Holly, you saved me first. By coming into my life, you saved me.'
…..
I could never send these two to a watery grave! Never ever. I'm sorry if I had readers thinking otherwise. The clue in the last chapter that Gail and Holly were going to survive this was that scene where Gail, Frankie and Oliver walk past the jewellery store advertising Valentine's Day and Gail says it's all a sham. If you've read my one-shot 'Valentine's Day', you'll know it's set about one month into the future and Gail and Holly are very much alive, and Frankie and Alannah are together. So it was full of spoilers!
So just for once, I haven't ended this on a cliffhanger – although Francine Hart is still out there somewhere. Is this the last we've seen of her?
Initially I didn't plan for Holly to lose her memory but then a reviewer – 5v5 - on Archive of Our Own suggested it as a possibility and it sort of took over and changed the whole direction of the chapter.
It looks like as long as Chappy keeps reading this, I'll have to keep writing. I may have made a rash promise of sorts. That said, I've been so busy, I've only had time to write and not read so I'm two chapters behind in EOINA – but I plan on catching up now.
I've replied to reviewers where I can, but thanks to all the guests for your comments. They are so very much appreciated. Sid, if you remember your password, I'd love to talk to you about this. Debby, thank you for always being so encouraging.
