Greetings from Niagara Falls!
It's been a lifetime since the last chapter - well over a year. I was wrapping up school for a while, and then of course the international circumstances began in earnest. You may think lockdown would have been in a perfect situation to finish this fanfic, but I have a big family and I had spent a lot of my free time with them (not to mention I still had a degree to finish). Now, I'm student teaching, adding to my list of responsibilities. I know this is a whole list of excuses, but at the end of the day this is just a fun story I like to return to.
I was reading all of your incredibly kind comments and messages recently and it made me feel horrible for neglecting to update in so long. Thank you all a million times over for the favorites and for your kind words! Rest assured, we will see this thing through!
I forgot to put a blurb at the end of the last episode (or maybe I was instinctively just eager to get the episode out after so long) so I didn't get a chance to do my usual briefing about what I decided to change and why.
The contestants who were rearing to come back changed because the story changed. I chose contestants (Alejandro, Izzy, Trent, Cody, Gwen) who I thought would each make an interesting addition/return to the series. In the end, though I really flirted with the idea of Izzy making a surprise return, I just had to bring back Alejandro for story purposes. Get ready for the drama to unfurl.
Here's a weird thought … this is our first time seeing the competition (and, thus, the titular character) since 2018! Yikes! Let's get right into it! This is our longest chapter yet, so buckle up!
Sierra stood in a field of flowers. It was a beautiful, serene scene. She was joined by a horrific monster, a fifty-foot-tall behemoth with claws and snake eyes. Despite the monster's horrible features, Sierra stood happily next to it.
The love of her life, Codykins, came up from over the hill. He was dressed in nothing but a pair of his classic tighty-whities.
Sierra swooned as she saw him. "Hiiii, Codykins!"
Cody did not respond. Instead, he screamed and pointed in horror at the giant monster next to her.
Sierra giggled. "Don't worry, Codykins, Courtney is a friendly monster. She won't bite!"
As the words left her lips, the giant monster devoured Cody in seconds, cutting short his agonizing screams of pain.
Sierra awoke with a fright, sweat beading down her forehead. She panted heavily, looking around.
"You look like you've seen a ghost, eh," Ezekiel's voice came from across the room.
"She's just freaking out because we voted the dweeb off of our team," Heather rolled her eyes. "And hey, I don't blame her. That should have been Courtney taking the jump."
"Buzz off," Courtney replied, staring aimlessly out the window at the night sky.
Sierra scowled at Courtney, but her back was to the fangirl, so the dirty look went unnoticed.
==CONFESSIONAL==
"I THOUGHT SHE WAS A FRIENDLY MONSTER, CODYKINS!" Sierra wailed. "I THOUGHT SHE WAS A FRIENDLY MONSTER!"
Her misery turned to fury in less than a second. "AND SHE WILL PAY! MAKE NO MISTAKE! SHE WILL PAY FOR WHAT SHE DID TO YOU!"
"Where do you think we're going next?" Owen asked Noah, as the two lazed about in first class, gazing out the window.
"Knowing Chris? Somewhere we'll die of hypothermia, malaria, heat stroke, or some combination of the three," Noah shrugged.
Across the aisle from them sat Tyler, who eyed them peculiarly.
==CONFESSIONAL==
"I know Owen and Noah are good buddies and all, but I really feel like I got double-teamed by them in Sweden," Tyler confided. "They both, like, made fun of me every step of the way, and that's just not cool, man."
"Uh, hey, guys," Tyler got the attention of his two teammates. "Uh, where do you think we're going next?"
Noah sighed. "Owen just asked me that, Tyler, and I already spent my sarcastic one-liner in response. Sorry, dude, but keep up next time."
Tyler sank back into his seat, grumbling. Noah's thoughts seemed to lie elsewhere.
==CONFESSIONAL==
"I don't have time to entertain Tyler right now, especially after his awful performance as our 'captain' in Sweden," Noah said. "I'm still thinking about Team Amazon's elimination. Surely one of the … weaker links of the team, like Ezekiel or Cody, was thrown out. That's just going to make future contests more difficult."
Finally, the team drifted off to sleep - Owen in a food coma from a first class feast, Noah and Tyler from the wear-and-tear of the Swedish excursion. All was pleasant in the jumbo jet …
… for maybe an hour.
Owen yawned and stretched, licking his chapped lips. "Ahhh. Good morning, Noah. Good morning, Tyler. Good morning, river." He closed his eyes for another few seconds, before they shot back open. "GOOD MORNING, RIVER?!"
Sure enough, beneath Owen was a huge river, and he looked around to see that he and his fellow contestants were on a collision course straight from above. He let this realization be known with a high-pitched scream, waking up all of the sleeping contestants around him.
"Oof, Owen, come on, man, can't you save the screaming for the challenge?" Noah opened an eye, only to see the rapidly growing river as he headed down to it. His scream was even more high-pitched than Owen's. In no time, the other contestants were fully awake, and it didn't take much longer for them to hit the water.
In the plane, Chef rubbed his hands after a job well done. Chris snickered alongside him, then looked quizzically at Chef. "We really should have just thrown Ezekiel out of this thing while he was asleep."
Chef thought about this, then shook his head. "I sure wasn't gonna be the one rooting through every nook and cranny for that little creep."
Chris shrugged. "Eh, fair enough."
The contestants trod water, which they soon discovered was quite freezing.
"Look, eh!" Ezekiel pointed as he struggled in the water. "Ducks!"
"Ooo, are they roasted?" Owen asked.
Noah turned to him in abject shock. "Is there ever a time or place where you can't think about food?"
Owen beamed. "It's one of my prouder abilities."
"Homeschool's wrong, as usual," Heather gestured behind them. There were two large swan paddle-boats that had made the trip with them. The contestants gravitated towards them, naturally breaking off into their two teams - Noah, Owen, and Tyler grabbing one, and Heather, Courtney, Sierra, and Ezekiel grabbing the other.
"Is the water gettin' louder, eh?" Ezekiel asked.
"Louder?" Courtney asked him, dumbfounded.
"Maybe we're heading towards a giant hot tub, and those are just the jets?" Tyler guessed.
Courtney steamed from hearing both Ezekiel and Tyler's ideas within a minute. "I'm surrounded by idiots!"
"Well, you won't be for much longer," Noah swallowed a lump in his throat as he pointed ahead. "The water is getting louder … we're heading towards a waterfall!"
Sheer panic flashed over the faces of all seven contestants as they approached what seemed to be their end.
"I always had a sinking feeling that this show would kill me," Noah sighed, forlorn.
"That host guy can still save us, eh," Ezekiel predicted. "He's almost killed us a million times, right? So why would this be different?"
"Do you see 'that host guy' anywhere?" Heather lashed out.
Courtney lowered her head in solemn prayer. "Oh, please, please, don't let me die! If I survive, I'll tutor anyone, really! Even Duncan! Even Tyler! Heck, even Ezekiel!"
Tyler and Ezekiel looked to each other in confusion.
"What is she talking about?" Tyler asked.
"I don't know, man, but it sounds like I've got a girl praying about me, eh," Ezekiel proudly boasted.
"I never got my kiss with Cody," Sierra wailed. "Why, why?! I'm sorry Cody!"
Upon seeing the pathetic state of her team, Heather gained a fierce look in her eyes, and began climbing into the paddle-boat she was grabbing.
"All the foods left untried …" Owen reflected.
"Bring it in, big guy," Noah reached in for a final hug from his best friend. The other contestants looked shocked at Noah's genuine act of human compassion, so he shrugged. "What? We're going to die, might as well not be a total piece of human garbage while I do it."
"Hey, losers!" Noah, Owen, and Tyler looked up from their paddle-boat to see Heather, who, with the help of Sierra, was lifting Ezekiel and Courtney into their paddle-boat. Sierra appeared to briefly consider leaving Courtney in the water, but Heather nonchalantly lifted her up, foiling any murderous thoughts. "Chris may not be here, but that doesn't mean we have to accept our deaths. You boys are more pathetic than I thought!"
Noah frowned. He turned to Owen and Tyler. "Get in!"
Owen attempted to climb in, only able to with unprecedented force from Noah and Tyler. When he made it in, he fairly easily lifted his two teammates into the paddle-boat.
"Now paddle like your lives depend on it," Heather ordered. "Because they do!"
==CONFESSIONAL==
"If anyone ever wants to challenge my role as this show's strongest competitors, I'd like to give them a piece of my mind," Heather smirked. "Surviving elimination from a team stacked against me, three times, and now ordering around the other team? Yeah, I'd like to see Noah or Alejandro do that."
With fierce determination, the seven contestants paddled their way to safety on the side of the river, just before they went over the waterfall. As if to emphasize the fate they had just avoided, when all seven contestants had made it onto the shore, the current of the river dragged the empty paddle-boats back into the stream, where they plummeted off the waterfall mere seconds later.
"Oof. Canadian environmental groups aren't gonna like that," Chris noted of the paddle-boat litter as he walked up to the contestants.
Courtney jumped up and nearly pounced upon Chris. "Do you know how much legal trouble you're going to be in, McLean? I plan on making your life a living -"
"Hey, now, aren't you glad I left you guys those nice paddle-boats?" Chris smiled. "You're welcome. Anyway, welcome to Niagara Falls! Now, follow me to today's challenge."
==CONFESSIONAL==
"He has such a way with words," Noah deadpanned.
The contestants stewed as they walked along the cliff.
"You know, I would've liked a hug, too," Tyler spoke up to his two teammates.
"I'm sure you would have," came Noah's characteristic sarcastic reply. Tyler frowned.
Sierra walked with a painful look on her face, towards the back of her team. Noah saw the misery on her face, and rolled his eyes.
"I'm going to regret this," he murmured to Owen. Then, he walked up to the fangirl. "Um, you good, Sierra?"
Sierra perked up upon hearing her name, turning to Noah. "Oh! Yeah. I'm okay."
"Okay. Because you kind of look like you want to throw yourself over the Falls," Noah raised an eyebrow inquisitively. "You know that's letting Chris win, right?"
Sierra smiled softly. "Oh, you remind me of Cody. He had such a sense of humor." Her smile turned wistful.
Noah held up his hands defensively. "But you do you." With this, he backed towards Owen.
"I'll try," Sierra's soft smile faltered. "I'll try my best, Cody." A few seconds after she said this, she perked up once again.
==CONFESSIONAL==
"Perfectly slim, adorably dorky, deeply cares about Sierra?" Sierra squealed, barely containing her excitement. "I think I might have found a Substitute Cody!"
"Hello, contestants, and welcome once again to Niagara Falls, a world capital of beautiful vistas and casino life!" Chris boasted once the seven contestants assembled. Most of them perked up at the thought of what Chris was describing. "All activities of which you will not have time to enjoy during our time here."
The contestants' faces fell back to their usual annoyed expressions.
"What's the stupid challenge, already?" Heather asked.
"In due time," Chris smiled a devilish grin. "First, if you'd step over here to the Niagara Falls Casino."
Owen elbowed Noah excitedly. "Looks like we're in for a little gambling, haha!"
"Sorry, we're going to be heading to the casino's concert theater," Chris explained. "You're all too young to legally enter the casino itself."
"Well, at least we can gamble with our lives," Noah retorted to Owen, who looked a bit dejected at missing out on some casino fun.
"Today's going to be an especially exciting day for all of you," Chris rubbed his hands together, a wide grin plastered on his face.
==CONFESSIONAL==
"Looks like we might die today after all," Courtney crossed her arms.
"First thing's first. The final seven will soon become the final eight," Chris revealed, "as a previously eliminated contestant will be making a grand return."
Predictably, the contestants appeared rather shocked and excited.
"Aw, man, please let it be Lindsay!" Tyler pleaded.
"I hope it's Izzy, I'd really love to make things up with her," Owen replied.
"Cody! Cody! Please bring my Codykins back!" Sierra begged enthusiastically.
Noah's face turned grim, as he contemplated the possibilities of who could return. One name seemed to come to his mind as a worst-case-scenario.
"You're all wrong," Chris chirped, as a familiar bell chimed, signaling a musical performance. "Allow our returning contestant to make his performance known with a song."
The curtains of the concert hall stage opened to reveal a familiar, well-toned contestant, who flashed a charismatic grin. Noah's face fell; this had clearly been the worst-case-scenario.
"Alejandro is my name, love and passion is my game," Alejandro sang gracefully, "And now I'm back for the grand prize left to claim!"
"It's Alejandro?" Heather sang, mostly in shock.
"I missed the memo," Ezekiel joined in, trying to recall who Alejandro even was.
"I'm b-b-back now, back now," Alejandro flashed another grin.
"This is so against the rules, does Chris think we're a bunch of fools?" Courtney protested the former contestant's return.
"Rules?" Chris interrupted. "This ain't no Sunday school, that guy up there's a ratings jewel!"
"It's Alejandro!" Owen sang - much like Heather, out of shock more than joy.
"Oh, n-n-no, no," Heather dissed.
"I'm b-b-back now, back now!" Alejandro smiled, patting Tyler and Owen on the back, while flashing Courtney one of his signature grins. "I may have to make up for lost time, but it's certainly great to be back - nice to see you, mi muchachos."
"It's Alejandro," Sierra sang.
"So much for this show," Noah deadpanned.
"Noah, my friend, it is truly so pleasant to see you again," Alejandro paused in the midst of his song to speak to his brief adversary. He did not even try to hide that he was delivering his fakest smile yet, visible only to Noah as he stared him dead in the eyes. "I will quite enjoy picking up where we left off last, hm?"
Noah tried not to break his deadpan, but enough fear became visible in his eyes that Alejandro's fake smile converted into a knowing smirk that he had gotten the better of his rival. Content with this, he turned around to finish his song. "After being condemned to the shadows, finally it's Alejandro!"
"He's not so strong though, we'll once again make him go," Noah murmured to Owen, indirectly rhyming and thus finishing the last line of the song.
"Ah, fenomenal!" Alejandro clasped his hands together, winking at an uncertain Courtney, smirking at a stewing Heather, and finally turning to Chris. "So, I imagine I will be joining my old team once again, si?"
"Actually, no," Chris smiled again. "Because, from this point forward, there will be no teams!"
"We're all eliminated?" Ezekiel gasped in shock.
Heather slapped him upside the head. "No, you dolt. The teams are merged, meaning I don't have to pretend to be nice to you anymore."
Chris chuckled. "I'll give you guys a few minutes to let this all sink in. When you're done, meet me at the doors to the casino."
As Chris walked off, Noah nodded knowingly at Owen, smirking slightly. "I look forward to working with you in the future, you big lug."
"Woo-hoo!" Owen cheered in response.
Behind him, Tyler stood a bit awkwardly.
==CONFESSIONAL==
"Owen and Noah are like this," Tyler held up two fingers interlocked, "and I've always been kind of … here." With this, Tyler held up his other pointer finger. He smiled softly. "Huh, using those fancy 'metaphors' is a lot easier when it's visual."
While observing his now-former teammates, Tyler was approached by Alejandro. The jock instinctively backed away a foot.
"Easy, easy, mi amigo," Alejandro tried to calm him down quietly, without alerting Owen and Noah to their conversation.
"L-Look, man, I'm still not happy with how you tricked Lindsay," Tyler crossed his arms. "S-So, there."
Alejandro sighed. "Can I say something to you, completely honestly?" Tyler didn't answer, and Alejandro took his silence to mean agreement. "I am not at all responsible for Lindsay's elimination. I swear on the entire Burromuerto family name, and on the lives of my loved ones, that I did not purposefully help eliminate Lindsay. I do not make this promise lightly."
==CONFESSIONAL==
"How was I so convincing?" Alejandro asked rhetorically. "Simple. I wasn't lying. I actually didn't cause Lindsay's elimination, not directly, at least. Noah pulled the wool over the eyes of poor, foolish Tyler." He smirked. "And that's given me an in."
Tyler relaxed a bit, but his frown remained. "Well … assuming you're not lying, why did Noah tell me you did?"
"Well, you recall what happened in London, right?" Alejandro said. "In my absence, Noah forced you to strip the guard, stretched you on the rack, and left you behind to be captured by the Ripper." Alejandro paused to let these memories resurface in Tyler's brain.
"Hm. Yeah, he did do that," Tyler recalled.
"And if he did not convince you that I was somehow evil, who would you have voted for?"
"Him …" Alejandro's logic hit Tyler like a freight train, though admittedly quicker-minded individuals would have been able to piece it all together a bit faster. "So he lied to me to escape elimination!"
Alejandro held up his hands innocently. "I do not know if this is guaranteed, but it definitely seems like what has happened. Tell me, how has he been treating you since?"
Tyler mulled this over. "We worked well in some of the challenges after that, although, y'know, he's more close with Owen than with me." Alejandro nodded as he absorbed this information; Tyler kept filling him in. "Then, last challenge, we were on a boat, and they let me be captain, but Noah kept criticizing me the whole time, and he really hasn't talked to me since.
"I have heard everything I need!" Alejandro nodded. "It does indeed sound like you have been played a dirty trick by Noah. But rest assured, I, Alejandro, am now here, and I will make sure you have nothing to worry about."
==CONFESSIONAL==
"Deceiving people is like caring for plants," Alejandro noted. "You have to continually provide the people you trick with support, much like you would have to provide your plants with water and sunlight. And if you ignore the people you have tricked - as it seems Noah has done to Tyler recently - their trust in you will simply start to wither away."
Alejandro smirked once again. "And that's where I come in."
Courtney played with her hair as she stared over the falls. Heather walked over.
"Please don't tell me you're still in emotional turmoil over stupid Duncan and stupid Gwen. Some of us are a little tired of your broken record attitude," Heather admonished.
"How brave of you to wait until the merge to say that to me, after you're out of my team's control," Courtney returned fire.
"Your team? Psh, yeah, right. The same team you tried to throw the challenge against, like, twice in a row," Heather rolled her eyes.
"Why don't you go hang out with your long-lost boyfriend?" Courtney turned around, glaring at her.
Heather rolled her eyes. "Ugh, Alejandro and I were never a thing. He wishes."
Courtney perked up at this, but said nothing else.
After a few more seconds, the final eight contestants made their way to the casino doors. Though they still could not enter, they found the building was blocked by a massive slot machine.
Chris smiled. "Did you guys know that Niagara Falls is an extremely popular destination for newlyweds? It's true! That's why it's colloquially known as the honeymoon capital of the world!"
Sierra instinctively looked around for Cody, but her eyes fell on Noah instead. She smiled blissfully all the same.
"What does that have to do with us, eh?" Ezekiel asked. He gasped. "Are we gettin' married?"
"In a way, yes," Chris smiled again. "For today's challenges, you will be paired in groups of two - a man and a woman. Or, in one case, a man and an Ezekiel."
"Wait, but I'm a man," Ezekiel protested.
"Yeah, but we have five boys, and three girls, so, as a former member of Team Amazon, you count as a woman," Chris explained.
"Why don't you pretend to be less intelligent, since you're a girl now?" Courtney mocked Ezekiel's sexism.
"That's gonna be pretty hard," Ezekiel shook his head. "I've got a sharp noggin, eh."
"I hate to interrupt Ezekiel's blatant lies, but at this time I'd like Owen, Noah, Tyler, and Alejandro to step into this giant slot machine," Chris gestured. "Girls … and Zeke … will take turns pulling this lever and seeing who you get." After the four boys named stepped into the casino, Chris added, "oh, and I decided to throw in a grizzly bear. Y'know, just for funsies." Chris' laughter was interrupted with the sounds of angry bear roars, and the frightened and painful screams of all four boys in the machine.
Ezekiel swallowed a lump in his throat. "On second thought, being a girl is fine."
"Who wants to spin first?" Chris offered - an offer that an excited Sierra immediately took him up on.
"New Cody, New Cody, New Cody," Sierra hoped as she pulled the lever. When Alejandro came tumbling out, Sierra nonchalantly slammed the door closed on him, resulting in winces of pain. "Chris, please let me pull again! Please!"
"Well, somebody's got to take Alejandro!" Chris protested.
"I'll do it," Heather stepped forward. "I mean, I might as well, right?" Courtney frowned at her, but said nothing.
==CONFESSIONAL==
"Okay, maybe I'm just trying to move on from He Who Shall Not Be Named, but I'll admit there's something about Alejandro that I find really … great." She sighed dreamily. "Plus, I caught him winking at me during his musical debut! Why should he get stuck with Heather?"
A slightly injured Alejandro stepped out of the slot machine, dusted himself off, gave Sierra a brief dirty look, and walked over to Heather, smiling happily at her. "Well, mi chica, I must say that I'm really looking forward to working towards our vows today."
"Buzz off," Heather rolled her eyes again.
Sierra pulled the lever once again, this time receiving her goal. Noah tumbled out, and barely had time to adjust to the sudden sunlight before Sierra scooped him up. "Yay! I got New Cody!"
==CONFESSIONAL==
Noah stared at the camera in abject horror. "New … Cody?"
Courtney walked up to the lever and pulled it, receiving a wild bear for her troubles. After a brief mauling, with Heather struggling to hold back laughter all the while, the CIT got up on her feet and pulled the lever once again.
Tyler came tumbling out. Beaten, covered in bear marks, and laying on the floor in a heap, he looked up at her. "Uh, 'sup?"
==CONFESSIONAL==
"I know Noah was flirting with Courtney in Sweden, but if Alejandro's right, then … maybe Noah deserves a little jealousy!" Tyler crossed his arms, harrumphing.
Courtney scraped her new partner off the ground as Ezekiel cautiously approached the lever and gave it a pull. "Wait … who's still left in there -"
Before he finished his question, Owen flew out of the slot machine, landing on the farm boy and unintentionally pinning him to the ground. Owen looked down to see that he was sitting on someone, and smiled nervously. "Oops."
==CONFESSIONAL==
"When I was younger, me and my pop were training some new cows, and one of them accidentally sat on me. Broke every bone in my body," Ezekiel recounted. "Somehow, this Owen dude felt even heavier than that."
The four odd couples were led to a maze. "Grooms, from a vantage point, you will lead your blindfolded brides through a maze to their wedding dresses. If a bride doesn't reach the dress within the allotted time constraints, her couple doesn't progress and both members lose their chance at immunity. The first bride to get her dress has an advantage in the second part of today's challenge."
Heather put on her blindfold, frowning all the while. "Alejandro, remember it's in our best interest to win."
"Of course," Alejandro nodded.
"So you won't intentionally lead me into any obstacles, right?"
"I would never!"
Heather's frown did not dissipate - she did not trust Alejandro for a minute - but she nonetheless finished putting on her blindfold.
"Okay, uh, how's this gonna work, eh?" Ezekiel asked Owen, as the latter applied his blindfold.
"Just listen to my commands, and follow them to a T," Owen explained.
"Follow your commands?" Ezekiel nodded. "Okay. Wow, I really am like a woman, eh."
For this comment, Courtney, who was nearby, delivered a kiwi-shot to the homeschooled farm boy.
"On your marks, get set, go!" Chris started.
"Walk straight," Alejandro ordered, which Heather did. "Now, quickly turn right - I mean, left." Heather turned right before Alejandro corrected himself, walking into a wall. "Ooo! My sincerest apologies, mi chica, I misspoke."
"Yeah, right. That was so on purpose!" Heather retaliated. A brief smile from Alejandro, though Heather could not see it, confirmed Heather's version of events.
"Just turn left and keep walking straight afterwards," Alejandro said, holding back a chuckle at Heather's misfortune.
"Uh, keep walking straight," Noah directed Sierra.
"Of course, New Cody, my darling fiancee!" Sierra cooed, following his directions.
"Noah," Noah corrected.
"Hm?" Sierra responded.
"My name is Noah."
"What did I say?"
"You called me 'New Cody.'"
Sierra giggled. "Whoopsies! Sorry!"
Noah deadpanned. "Just turn right, okay?"
"Turning right, New Cody! Thank you!"
Noah sighed.
==CONFESSIONAL==
"I kept track of all the personal space violations Sierra gifted to Cody during their time together," Noah shuddered. "I wouldn't wish that on my worst enemy. And now it looks like it's going to happen to me."
"Um, Tyler, where am I going?" Courtney asked, a bit impatiently.
"Uh, right." Courtney turned right, and walked into a wall. "No, no, sorry, I meant 'right,' like, 'yeah, you're right, we should get a move on.'"
Courtney grumbled at this miscommunication. "Okay, so, where am I going?"
"Go straight, then turn right, sorry, um, my right."
"We're both facing the same way, we have the same right," Courtney scowled in her blindfold.
"Uh, right, you're right," Tyler smiled sheepishly. "I mean, 'you are right,' not 'your right,' as in the right that's not mine -"
"I get it, thanks," Courtney snapped.
==CONFESSIONAL==
"Courtney is kind of … terrifying," Tyler explained his nervousness. "I don't want to risk making her mad at me, so I guess I kind of got in my own head about giving the right directions."
Owen looked around nervously as the other groups went by. He squinted into the distance to see that there was a large wedding cake set up towards the end of the maze, by the dresses. He licked his lips. "Ezekiel, follow the smell of the wedding cake!"
Ezekiel took a deep sniff, and then stopped. "I don't really have a great sense of smell, eh. That's what happens when you spend your whole life around manure."
Owen grimaced. "Don't tarnish the deliciousness of cake with manure! Just walk straight, then turn right, okay?"
As all four groups tried their best, one groom grew increasingly annoyed.
"Which way now, my darling New Cody?" Sierra asked.
Noah sighed deeply.
==CONFESSIONAL==
"I'll admit, I thought about just giving up on trying to win immunity," Noah said. "But with Alejandro here … I think I could be done for if I don't win today."
"It's two more rights, then a left, then you're there," Noah muttered, resigned to his fate.
Sierra perked up happily, practically skipping through the remaining obstacles. Alejandro caught sight of this, and scowled. "Heather, pick up the pace a little. Another left and then run straight, as fast as you can."
"How will I know you're not leading me to go sprinting into a wall?" Heather replied.
"Just trust me on this, okay?"
Heather forced a laugh. "Sure, fine."
"Heather!"
Heather begrudgingly picked up the pace a bit, and managed to narrowly beat Sierra to a wedding dress.
"Heather and Alejandro are the first successful couple, followed by Noah and Sierra shortly after!"
Alejandro grinned at hearing this.
==CONFESSIONAL==
"There is some poetic justice in besting Noah, especially in what is only my first challenge after returning to the game," Alejandro said.
Shortly after, Ezekiel wandered out of the maze. He felt up a dress. "Wait, I gotta wear this?"
Chris' smile didn't falter. "Yup! Don't worry, it's your size." Courtney was about halfway through the maze when Chris turned his attention to the room's PA system. "Three of our four couples have made it to their dresses! Thirty more seconds until we move on!"
"May I?" Alejandro walked up to Tyler, asking to borrow his earpiece. He nodded rapidly, handing it over. "Hello, Courtney. This is Alejandro. I apologize for your miscommunications with Tyler, but I can help you."
"Oh! Alejandro, t-thank you!"
"Mm, of course, senorita. You need only take two more lefts, a right, and then, if you walk straight, you will hit your dress. I am sure it will fit you beautifully."
Courtney gushed at Alejandro's compliments, following his directions and making it to her dress in the last five seconds of the challenge.
"Wonderful job, half of Tyler and Courtney's team!" Chris congratulated. "All four couples will advance to the second part of today's challenge."
After the brides changed into their dresses, the couples followed Chris to the second part of the day's events.
"Oh, man, I hope my buds back home don't see this," Ezekiel observed his body in the wedding gown.
"Don't worry, homeschool, the animals on your farm aren't capable of understanding how big a fool you're making of yourself," Heather dissed. As Ezekiel walked off, the queen bee turned her glare to Alejandro. "Um, what was that?"
"Mm? What was what?"
"Don't be coy with me. Why are you going around helping the other contestants like how you helped Courtney back there?"
Alejandro appeared to think his response over, and then smiled calmly at Heather. "Heather, mi chica, you do not need to be jealous just because I am being a gentleman."
"Jealous!" Heather scowled. "Why, you no good -"
"Uh, Al?"
Alejandro cringed at his nickname, before plastering a smile over his face and turning to Tyler. "Ah, Tyler. Yes, what is it?"
Tyler nervously turned back to where Courtney was walking a few feet behind him. Her disappointed face turned to one of dreamy joy when she locked eyes with Alejandro. Alejandro gave her a wink for her troubles, before turning his attention to Tyler once the jock began to speak. "Uh, you're, like, y'know, good with chicks. How did you make Courtney, er … not hate you? I feel like I'm gonna need her on my side if the two of us are gonna win this challenge."
"Ah, this is easy. Simply say something nice about her. This will help her relax," Alejandro explained. Tyler gave him a thumbs-up, and walked back to face his partner.
"So, Courtney. I really like your, uh, bossiness," Tyler smiled in a friendly manner, recoiling in horror at Courtney's fierce retaliatory glare. "Uh, I mean that in a good way, y'know?"
==CONFESSIONAL==
"Why is making other people not hate you so hard?" Tyler sighed. "Man, it must be nice to be Owen."
"Hey, dude, did you just see that?" Noah asked Owen. The former was being carried by Sierra, but was too lazy to ask her to put him down. The latter walked beside Ezekiel. Neither Ezekiel nor Sierra seemed to have anything to add to the conversation.
"Did I see what?"
"Tyler and Alejandro just had a conversation," Noah pointed out. Owen looked to see the jock slowly backing away from Alejandro, and then making small talk with Courtney.
"Uh … good for them?" Owen scratched the back of his head, not seeing the issue with his two fellow competitors briefly talking.
"Owen, you big lug, do you know what's going on here? Alejandro is clearly trying to form an alliance with Tyler."
"And what does that mean?" Owen asked, still not getting it.
Noah sighed. "If Alejandro gets enough votes, at any point in the future, it's game over for both of us."
"Ohhhh."
Noah turned to his bride/captor. "Sierra, you'll vote with me, right?"
Sierra grew incredibly serious. "Of course, New Cody. You have my full support for anyone you vote for."
==CONFESSIONAL==
"I've learned my lesson about ignoring the votes of my loved ones," Sierra said wistfully, wiping a tear from her eye. Her expression of melancholy turned instantly into one of rage. "COURTNEY!"
"Hey, uh, I'll vote with you, eh," Ezekiel offered.
"If all four of us vote together, and Alejandro gets Heather, Tyler, and Courtney," Noah added, as Sierra scowled at the mention of Courtney's name and Ezekiel resumed totally zoning out, "then we at least force a tie."
"Force a tie for what, my friend?" Alejandro asked.
Ezekiel looked at him. "Oh, we're talking about voting -"
Owen clasped a hand over the homeschool's mouth. "For president! Voting for president, of the, um … Noah Fan Club!"
"And I was elected unanimously!" Sierra boasted, squeezing her "New Cody" tighter.
"Really," Alejandro stared dubiously. "I believe I will refrain from joining this club."
"Your choice," Sierra closed her eyes and turned away. "Even if it's wrong."
"Alright, contestants, we're at the next leg of the challenge. Everybody ready?" Chris gestured towards a death-defying tightrope walk across the falls.
Noah's face fell from fear to its usual deadpan. "You can't be serious."
"I think you know by now that I absolutely can!" Chris chuckled maniacally. "Grooms must carry their brides across the falls, from the American side to the Canadian side. You know, most tightrope walkers require weeks, even months of practice, but I figure you kids are smart enough to handle yourselves out there without any practice at all!" Chris finished his fun fact with a smile, to the chagrin of the contestants.
"That's nice of him, callin' us smart like that," Ezekiel elbowed Owen.
"Once you reach the other side, you'll have to answer a Canadian trivia question from Chef, and if you get it right, you will be allowed to immigrate into Canada and receive immunity in today's elimination ceremony," Chris finished. "Since Alejandro and Heather were the first to reach their bride's dress, they get a headstart on the tightrope."
Alejandro gracefully lifted Heather into his arms. "Alright, let us get a move on then!"
Heather turned to stick her tongue out at Courtney, who scowled in shock.
==CONFESSIONAL==
"Don't get me wrong, Alejandro is a total scuzzball," Heather explained. "And I definitely do not like him. But if occasionally cozying up to him means getting back at Courtney for every whiny, annoying thing she did on Team Amazon, then by all means!"
==CONFESSIONAL==
Courtney was fuming. "Of all the obnoxious, insecure, nasty, horrible -"
Alejandro took off gracefully down the rope, tightrope-walking clearly located somewhere on his list of incredible talents. Heather even looked briefly taken aback by Alejandro's impressive momentum, before resuming her usual grouchy demeanor, arms crossed and turning her head to her fellow competitors. Once again, she stuck out her tongue at Courtney.
The CIT scowled. "How long is their headstart?"
Chris looked at his watch, then back to Alejandro and Heather, and then back to his watch. Finally, he shrugged. "Eh, you're good."
"Let's go, Tyler," Courtney motioned for her groom to carry her across. The nervous Tyler gingerly scooped up his bride, and walked towards the tightrope. He stared down at the overwhelming distance between them and the bottom of the falls, and swallowed a lump in his throat.
He took an uneasy step onto the tightrope, then one more, at which he immediately lost his balance and fell. Owen, Ezekiel, Noah, and Sierra winced in anticipation, but slowly opened their eyes to see Tyler barely managing to hang on with one of his hands, while the other clutched Courtney.
"Alright, my fingers of steel still got it!" Tyler smiled.
==CONFESSIONAL==
"I don't mean to brag or anything, but my fingers are, like, freakishly strong," Tyler reminded the viewers, stretching his hands.
Courtney, however, did not appear as impressed with the strength of her groom's fingers. "PULL US UP!" she shrieked, desperately trying not to look down.
"Uh … okay!" Tyler attempted to lift himself up a few times, but got nowhere.
"I'm just gonna … step over you," Owen gingerly placed a foot on the other side of Tyler's grasped hand, and walked down the tightrope.
Noah attempted to lift up Sierra, but failed, so Sierra once again scooped him up.
"Oh, I don't mind leading us, my little New Codykins," the fangirl smiled giddily.
==CONFESSIONAL==
"It's a million dollars. It's a million dollars. It's a million dollars. It's a million dollars. It's a million dollars," Noah drilled the prize into his head.
==CONFESSIONAL==
"What New Cody doesn't know is that I'm actually a licensed minister," Sierra said. "Yup! Got ordained online. If I had my old Codykins with me, I'd definitely get married! But I'm on the fence with New Cody … I need to find out if he's got the commitment and dedication to me that I need in a husband!"
Sierra walked forward on the tightrope, also stepping over Tyler's fingers as the jock desperately tried to claw his way from defeat. Noah's typical deadpan turned to horror as he, too, looked at the chasmic drop beneath them.
"New Cody," Sierra said shyly. "What would you do if I … let go of you?"
Noah looked to her with a deadpan, clearly setting up a sarcastic reply. His face paled when he saw Sierra's gleeful, slightly crazed grin.
"Uh … please don't?" Noah requested, worriedly.
"You want to stay with me?"
"Just don't let go of me, alright?" Noah said. "I feel like I shouldn't even have to say that."
==CONFESSIONAL==
"Then again, you never know with that one," Noah swirled his finger around his head in an expression of Sierra's craziness.
==CONFESSIONAL==
"'Just don't let go of me,'" Sierra repeated Noah's words, sighing dreamily. "Now that's commitment!"
Alejandro glanced behind him, as Owen and Sierra walked a bit more cautiously than he was striding. When he was comfortable with the distance he put between himself and them, he looked down at Heather. "So, did you miss me while I was gone?"
"Psh, hardly. Everyone else was such an idiot."
"Oh, really?"
"Well, you can imagine. Cody, Sierra, Owen, Tyler … and then once Zeke joined the competition, the average IQ dropped by a hundred points."
Alejandro smirked. "I admit, I was surprised to see that farm boy back in the game."
"Don't even get me started. And then everything with Courtney, Duncan, and Gwen made the three of them act like a trio of morons."
"Sounds like you've been without a real rival for some time, then," Alejandro's smirk grew.
"Well … I guess, technically, there was Noah."
Alejandro's smirk faded at this, something that piqued Heather's interest. "Mm. And how was Noah as a competitor?"
"He was his team's leader for a while - out of Owen, Tyler, Duncan, and himself, he was the smartest. Though a monkey would be smarter than Owen, Tyler, and Duncan."
Alejandro nodded in appreciation of Heather's joke at the intelligence of his former teammates, but still seemed distracted. "And how did he do?"
"Poorly," Heather replied, something that immediately made Alejandro's face relax. "I mean, his team lost in Greece, barely won in Area 51 thanks to Owen's gluttony, lost in Australia, and barely won in Sweden thanks to Owen's size and stench."
Alejandro nodded once more. "Sounds like Noah was riding Owen's coattails, hm?"
"Well, what do you expect? He's a skinny little brainiac hiding behind a massive elephant for protection," Heather explained.
==CONFESSIONAL==
"Achilles, I think I just found your heel," Heather said. "And its name is 'Noah.'"
The tense conversation ended as the bride and groom reached the end of the tightrope, and walked up to Chef Hatchet, who was dressed up as a customs officer and sat in a small tollbooth.
"Hello, and welcome to the great nation of Canada," Chef read from an index card. "You must answer some questions before we allow you in. What is the national bird of Canada?"
"Are you for real?" Heather asked, turning her gaze to Alejandro. "Well?"
"Que?" Alejandro asked her.
"Don't play dumb with me, isn't this the part where you say your cousin's neighbor was a Canadian fun fact expert and you know everything?"
Alejandro raised an eyebrow playfully. "You actually think that highly of me? Mi chica, that is so -"
"That's not what I meant," Heather interrupted, grumbling.
Alejandro's smile remained, and he looked to Chef. "Is it the Canadian goose?"
Chef shook his head, and pointed back to the tightrope. "Your appeal for entry has been rejected. Go back to the start and try again."
==CONFESSIONAL==
"Between the alliances I have forged since my return, I do not think I can reasonably be eliminated - Courtney and Tyler will not vote for me, and for all her theatrics, neither will Heather," Alejandro predicted confidently. "What is important now is not looking like a threat."
As Alejandro carried Heather back the way they came, they ran into a certain superfan - and a sarcastic egghead in her arms.
"Noah."
"Alejandro," came the bookworm's reply.
"Listen, mi amigo, I have a proposition for you," Alejandro said, breaking the tense silence. "I know we both dislike one another, but I also know we both value our place in the game."
"What are you getting at?" Noah's brow raised in curiosity.
"Owen's popularity makes him a massive threat to us - massive in more ways than one," Alejandro referenced their former teammate's obesity. "Vote him off tonight, and I'll steer clear of you for the remainder of the competition. Perhaps we can face the finale as a gentlemen's battle."
"Um, hell-o?" Heather protested. "What am I, chopped liver?"
Noah stared at Alejandro, dumbfounded. "You really think I'm going to vote off my closest friend in the competition?"
"Owen will still be there, happily waiting for you like a morbidly obese puppy, if you make it to the end. He never even has to know you voted for him. I'm just saying, amigo, if you were a true strategist, you wouldn't care for silly things like 'friendships' in this game," Alejandro argued. Sierra observed the conversation with interest, looking from Alejandro to Noah, back and forth, until Alejandro spoke again. "You think about that, hm?"
With this, Alejandro gracefully front-flipped over Sierra and Noah, landing perfectly and continuing his march back to the starting point.
Noah stared uneasily, before turning back towards Chef. "We should get going, Sierra."
"Gladly!" the fangirl cooed.
Owen wobbled cautiously over the tightrope, with Ezekiel in his arms. There was an awkward silence between the two of them - probably not aided by the fact that Ezekiel was in a wedding dress.
Finally, Owen perked up. "Hey, you wanna see something cool?" When Ezekiel nodded, Owen closed his mouth and strained for a good five seconds, before letting out an enormous belch that sounded like "EZEKIEL."
Ezekiel stared at him in shock, and what looked like a little bit of horror. "Whoa, dude … are you, like, possessed, or something?"
Owen laughed. "I can burp anything! Watch!" He scrunched up his mouth, and looked past Ezekiel. "HI, AL," he burped, as Alejandro walked up to them. Ezekiel offered a wave.
Alejandro barely held back his disgust, turning a slight shade of green as he looked over Owen. "Ah, hello, Owen. And … Ezekiel, right?
"Zeke to my friends, eh," Ezekiel beamed.
"Ah, of course," Alejandro nodded.
==CONFESSIONAL==
"To be honest, other than the trickery of Noah, I cannot think of two more disgusting competitors than Owen and Ezekiel. How fitting that they ended up together for this challenge," Alejandro said.
"Sorry to bother you, Al, but we've got to get going," Owen explained. "We need to win this challenge."
"Um, we obviously want to win this challenge, too," Heather shot back.
"Everyone, there's a very reasonable way to settle this, eh," Ezekiel said, before looking at Owen. "Let's charge 'em!"
==CONFESSIONAL==
"I've had my experience riding bulls, eh, and when you're on the back of a bull nothin' can stop 'em," Ezekiel said. "Owen reminds me of a bull."
Owen smiled sheepishly. "I don't know if that's a good idea."
"What's the worst that could happen, huh?" Ezekiel shrugged. Owen thought this over, and shrugged as well.
"Alejandro, you want to do one of those show-off flips again?" Heather desperately gestured to her groom.
"WOO-HOO!" Owen bellowed. Alejandro revved up another impressive bound, but he did not have the time. Owen charged forward, Ezekiel on his shoulders with a fist raised triumphantly. This collision ended about as well as anyone could have predicted - Alejandro and Heather went careening off the side, and Owen quickly lost his balance and took Ezekiel down with him.
==CONFESSIONAL==
"Remember how I said Owen and Ezekiel are probably the most disgusting contestants?" Alejandro frowned bitterly at the camera. "Well, they are also the stupidest. Tyler, I relieve you of your crown."
"What was that?" Courtney cried, as she heard four screams of agony. She turned slightly to see four of her fellow competitors falling into the water deep below, including Alejandro. She frowned at this, before scowling and looking up at Tyler. "Any luck at all, Mr. Strong Fingers?"
Tyler, indeed, still impressively held onto the tightrope, but showed little sign of being able to lift the two of them back up. "Still working on it," he said.
As the two of them struggled, Sierra carried Noah towards the finish line.
"Okay, luckily for us, I know basically every fact they could throw at us," Noah confidently predicted. "We've got this in the bag."
"And with first place, comes a night in luxury," Sierra giggled. "Just the two of us."
"Um … yeah …"
Sierra cleared her throat, before rushing through a prepared statement: "DoYouNewCodyAlsoLegallyReferredToAsNoahTakeSierraToBeYourLawfullyWeddedWifeInSicknessAndInHealth?"
Noah stared at her in confusion, before finally replying. "What?"
"Do you want to win a million dollars?'" Sierra tried.
"Yes."
Sierra grumbled. "What's another way to say 'yes?'"
Noah continued to look absolutely bewildered. "Yeah?"
Sierra stopped dead in her tracks. "New Cody, do you want me to keep walking towards the end of this tightrope?"
"Yes, I do."
Sierra opened her mouth to try and think of another way to get Noah to say the magic words, but stopped herself when she realized what he said. "S-Say that again."
"Yes, I do," Noah swallowed a lump in his throat.
"Remove the first word!" Sierra smiled giddily.
"I do?" Noah whimpered, before his look of fear and confusion turned to his signature deadpan as it occurred to him what had just happened. "Oh, you have got to be kidding me."
"YAY! YOU MAY NOW KISS THE BRIDE!" Sierra squealed with joy. Between her excited jittering, and Noah's instant squirming at this last sentence, the married couple quickly lost balance on the tightrope. As they fell over, Noah grabbed the rope in one hand, and Sierra in the other. The fangirl looked at him with pure bliss. "Oh, New Cody … promise me you'll never let go."
Noah briefly attempted to pull them up, but realized it was getting nowhere. He deadpanned once again and let go, allowing both himself and Sierra to plummet into the falls.
Meanwhile, Tyler desperately attempted to lift himself and Courtney up, continuing to fail and leaving them in a limbo-like status of not falling, but also not being able to complete the challenge. A shadow suddenly loomed over their heads, and both Tyler and Courtney looked up to see the grinning face of Chris.
"Hey, Chris … little help, man?" Tyler asked.
Chris ignored him. "I'm not sure what's less surprising to me: the fact that you two fell three feet from the starting point, or the fact that all of your fellow competitors failed in even more pathetic and hilarious ways than that. You know what that makes you?"
"Survivors?" Tyler tried.
"Winners?" Courtney asked, a pained smile on her face.
"As much as it hurts me to say this, Courtney's right," Chris said. "You two win by default! First class is yours for the taking on our next flight."
Tyler and Courtney cheered, before Tyler once again looked up at the host. "But seriously … can you help me out here, bro?"
"Of course!" Chris smiled, extending a hand. "Give me your hand!"
Tyler smiled, letting go to give Chris his free hand - only to send himself and Courtney plummeting into the falls. Chris winced as he watched them fall.
==CONFESSIONAL==
"I'm adding Tyler to my list of people who put my life in danger," Courtney said. "He'll be right in between Sierra and Chris."
As the contestants boarded the plane, Noah saw Alejandro whisper something into Heather's ear.
"I don't know about you guys, but I think I've really got a chance with that Heather chick, eh," Ezekiel puffed his chest.
"You - I … you can't be serious," Noah said.
"As serious as the day I was born. Wish me luck, eh," Ezekiel walked forward, far too proudly for his own good, into the plane. Noah shook his head with a smirk on his face, but his expression soon turned more serious.
"What's up, little buddy?" Owen asked, as the two entered the jumbo jet.
"Oh … nothing, just, y'know, tired and soaking wet," Noah managed to turn his anxious expression into a deadpan. "Listen - about who we're voting for tonight." Owen perked up, leading Noah to continue. "It's got to be Alejandro. He's an enormous threat. You remember how he took out Team Victory."
Owen nodded. "But when Duncan came back, Chris saved him from elimination last-minute. What if he does that with Al?"
Noah's brow raised. "Dude … I think this is the first time you've ever thought of something before me."
"I learn from the best!" Owen pulled Noah into a hug.
"I want in on this!" Sierra weaseled her way into the hug to squeeze Noah. "My hubby New Cody!"
Owen gave Noah a bizarre look, which Noah returned with an expression of sadness.
"Sierra, you'll vote with us tonight, right?"
"Of course, New Cody!" Sierra smiled. "It'll be for Courtney, right?"
"We can vote her off next. Right now our biggest threat is Alejandro."
Sierra opened her mouth to argue, but stopped.
==CONFESSIONAL==
"When I didn't vote the way Cody wanted me to, he got bucked out of the plane by an elk!" Sierra said. "I'll vote any way New Cody wants me to!"
"With Ezekiel, that should be four votes," Noah counted. "But I want to try and get five."
With this, he eyed Tyler, as the jock prepared to enter first class. He was hardly able to get his foot in the door before Alejandro rounded the bend, wrapping an arm around Tyler and shooting a glare at Noah, before inviting the jock into pleasant conversation and disappearing into first class. Courtney followed not long after, her pained expression turning a blushing bright red as she realized Alejandro would be in the room with her. She played with her hair before entering first class.
"I … don't think that's gonna happen," Owen smiled sheepishly.
==CONFESSIONAL==
"Nice try, mi amigo," Alejandro chuckled. "But I'm not letting my guard down ever again."
Ezekiel entered loser class - currently occupied only by Heather, who stewed quietly.
"Hey, Heather, you look like you just got beaten in a sack race. What's wrong?"
Heather struggled to find a comeback to this ridiculous comparison, before sighing. "Buzz off, homeschool. I'm busy not attracting flies, and you're making that task a lot more difficult."
Ezekiel walked closer, the insult flying straight over his head. "So, who are you gonna vote for?"
Heather glared at him, with a bitter expression that would have been hard to read by even someone who wasn't a socially inept farm boy. "Courtney."
"Courtney?" Ezekiel cocked his head.
"Yeah, remember how mean she was as team leader? She needs to leave, ASAP."
Ezekiel pondered this. "Hm. She was pretty mean, wasn't she?"
Heather smirked.
==CONFESSIONAL==
"Okay, I know, Alejandro is a total overcompensating jerk," Heather said, "but … it's only in my best interest to ally myself with him … at least for now. He wants to split the votes against him, that he's sure he's going to be getting. And if I get to vote off some of the losers still on this plane to help him out, then that's just icing on top of the cake."
The final eight contestants sat in their bleachers, eyeing each other warily as they awaited one of their eliminations. Chris entered the room, seemingly absorbing the anxiety elicited from the remaining competitors.
"I guess we should get right into it, shouldn't we?" Chris smiled. Alejandro slowly nodded, his head resting on his hand as he glared at Noah.
"First off, let's celebrate our happy married couple."
Sierra squealed with joy, clutching Noah tightly. "Aw, thank you! We're so happy together!"
Heather stifled a laugh as Noah sighed.
"Okay … a little freaky, not gonna lie," Chris said. "But I was talking about Tyler and Courtney. They didn't cross the Canadian border for their honeymoon, but they made it closer than the lot of you. They're both safe."
"Righteous!" Tyler reached over to Courtney for a fist-bump, which went unrewarded, leaving Tyler to awkwardly return his arm to a normal position.
"Nice job, Tyler," Noah smiled sheepishly.
"Yeah, congrats!" Owen smiled, much more brightly and comfortably than Noah.
Tyler looked away awkwardly, as Alejandro's glare intensified. "Oh, uh, thanks guys."
"However!" Chris said loudly, dramatically hushing the awkward conversation. "Despite her immunity, Courtney received a single vote."
Ezekiel proudly stood up, arms crossed. "Ha! That's what you get for, uh, being a bossy team captain, eh!" He closed his eyes triumphantly, before opening them in shock. "Hey, wait, Chris. I think you read that wrong, eh. That should be two votes."
"No, it shouldn't be," Heather smiled maliciously.
Noah's face paled in the realization that he had lost Ezekiel's vote, while Alejandro's glare was joined by a knowing smirk.
Ezekiel awkwardly sat back down, smiling optimistically at Courtney. "No hard feelings, eh." Courtney shot him a dirty look.
==CONFESSIONAL==
"Even when Team Amazon is dead, I'm still Team Amazon's number one punching bag!" Courtney cried.
"Alright, let's keep the ball rolling here," Chris continued. "Safe with zero votes are Ezekiel, Sierra, and Heather. You're all obnoxious in your own right, but apparently you weren't obnoxious enough today."
"Thanks a lot," Heather scowled.
Alejandro's smirk grew even more as he narrowed his gaze on Owen and Noah, who both appeared visibly nervous. Noah was pale - either from anxiousness or Sierra's tight grasp cutting off his bloodstream, but more likely a combination of the two. Owen tensed up, his nervous frown growing.
"Owen, my man," Chris started. "How are you feeling?"
"Are you kidding, Chris? I'm feeling like I'm about to pass out!" Owen blurted, in his characteristic honesty.
"Well, you can pass out knowing you're safe, buddy," the host revealed. "You're safe with zero votes to your name."
Owen sighed with relief, as Noah's fearful expression turned to one of sadness. He turned to look at Alejandro, who smiled at him.
==CONFESSIONAL==
"Looks like they didn't end up voting for Owen," Noah said.
==CONFESSIONAL==
"Owen is annoying, but why waste the chance to get rid of someone annoying and directly responsible for my own elimination?" Alejandro shrugged calmly.
Chris read the votes. "One vote for Noah. One vote for Alejandro. Another vote for Noah. Another vote for Alejandro." Noah, Owen, and Sierra watched Chris tensely. Ezekiel appeared mostly confused, but semi-interested, while Heather looked as though she couldn't care less. Tyler watched with a somewhat concerned expression, while Courtney looked worriedly at Alejandro, who watched Chris, the smile gone from his face - he now knew, firsthand, that he could not be 100% certain of his own security.
"One more vote for Noah. And one more vote for Alejandro," Chris tallied. "That's three votes apiece. And the final vote … is for …"
Chris revelled in the uncertainty, leading Owen to stand up. "Well, who is it?!"
"Noah!" Chris revealed. Noah closed his eyes. Sierra and Owen hugged him, wailing all the while. Tyler had a complicated look about him, as though he was unsure of what to feel, while Ezekiel was, of course, impossible to read. Heather let out a short sigh of relief, but looked around to make sure no one else had heard it. Alejandro's smile returned to his face.
"You know the procedure, right Noah?" Chris asked.
"Yeah, thanks a lot," Noah replied, standing up.
"No! Please! Throw me out instead!" Owen pleaded.
"No, Owen," Noah stopped him, genuinely touched. "You're staying here, and continuing the fight."
"Actually …" Chris' smile grew devilishly. "You'll both be staying here and continuing the fight. Because this was just a reward challenge!"
Alejandro's jaw dropped at this revelation, while Noah sat back down, in a stupor.
"Ugh, are you for real?" Heather rolled her eyes. "It's been, like, how long since you pulled that card on us? Newfoundland?"
"For your information, no one went home in Greece either," Chris reminded her. "And nobody's taking the drop of shame today either." With this, he turned to Noah. "I'd count your lucky stars if I were you. Who's to say if you'll get another one of these lifelines?"
With this, Chris strolled out of the room, preparing to do the outro. Tyler was the first to leave, awkwardly making his way back to first class. Courtney followed shortly after, looking at Alejandro - who, for his part, seemed able to control any emotion he might have been feeling enough to flash her a small smile, which she accepted with a blush.
Heather, too, took her leave, as did Ezekiel not long after. Alejandro stepped towards Noah. "Er, Owen, Sierra, would you mind? I'd like to have a word with our friend Noah here."
Owen regarded the proposition with caution, before gaining an approving nod from Noah. The larger-than-life contestant stood up and walked out of the room, followed begrudgingly by Sierra, who blew Noah a kiss on the way out.
With this, Noah did his best to regain his usual uncaring demeanor as he faced Alejandro.
"I'm guessing you got Heather to change Ezekiel's vote, huh?" Noah asked.
"Well, give Heather a little credit - she could not have pulled it off without her natural cunning," Alejandro smiled. "Cunning that, I cannot help but notice, you lack. Why didn't you vote for Owen, as we discussed?"
Noah's brow raised. "Well, I could ask you the same thing, seeing as I never agreed to vote for my best friend."
"There you go again with this 'friend' thing," Alejandro tsked. "Get that silly idea out of your big, quadrilateral head, mi amigo. It's going to get you nowhere. And I decided to ignore Owen because, surprisingly, someone in this competition got on my nerves a little more. Someone who was always ready with a comeback, but never ready to actually do any work. Someone who compared me to an eel." Noah swallowed a lump in his throat, but stood tall, even as Alejandro inched closer. "You're not fooling Courtney, you're not fooling Tyler, and you're not fooling me. You got lucky today. Your luck has run out."
With this, Alejandro turned and walked leisurely out of the cargo hold. Noah took a seat, and sighed.
==CONFESSIONAL==
"I escaped elimination today … only by the whim of Chris," Noah noted, wiping a bead of sweat from his forehead. "I think I really need to get my head in the game."
Chris laughed maniacally as he turned around in the copilot's seat of the cockpit. "Yeah, I sure think he does! Bringing back Alejandro has sure made things interesting, huh?" He looked to Chef, who nodded. "Rivalries are intensifying, and romances are blossoming - even this late in the game! What's up with Tyler? What's up with Ezekiel? And, man, what is up with Sierra?! Tune in next time to find out how we torture our final eight contestants, right here, on Total! Drama! World Tour!"
What a doozy! Old readers, thank you all so much for sticking around - and new readers, thank you for joining! Again, it's been over a year since this was last updated, but, as I've promised, I will see this story through! Rest assured, you will not have to wait until 2022 to see what comes next!
Alright, that's my spiel about the story broadly, now let's get into the nitty-gritty (spoiler warning!):
I flirted with the elimination this episode, but it had been a long time since the last "reward challenge." I know the idea of the random occasional "reward challenge" was kind of gimmicky in World Tour itself, but it provided the writers a way to keep everyone on the plane when it wasn't anybody's time to go. Plus, in the actual show, Sweden was supposed to be a reward challenge, and in "Noah the Schemer" it was not, so it only seemed fair to switch it around with Niagara Falls.
We've still got all seven of our final contestants - now eight, with the rejoining of Alejandro. Things are already looking tense …
I will see you all in China!
