I know I was drunk, I know, but I couldn't help it. God. I will never drink again.
Rosalie quickly looked around and at me "You just think that Bella, it's not true."
I frowned at her. I knew my feeling for her were real. I don't know if she was trying to make me feel better or blame it on the alcohol, but I definitely was not going to let it go. If I said, I said it.
"It's true Rosalie. I didn't understand it at the beginning, but you are such a great person. I love your personality, you are serious and fun, and so smart!" I gushed about her to her. My word vomit could not stop so I continued "Obviously you are beautiful, but there is so much more to you than your looks. I see you, Rosalie. And I see beyond your beauty." I was on the verge of tears. I knew my crush was huge. Humongous. And as the cat was out of the bag, I might as well make it worse. I stoop up to a bully, and I told the truth of how I was feeling to Rosalie. This was the night; everything was coming out.
She leaned in so quick I didn't notice, making my breath catch in the moment of her nose almost touching my nose. She looked at me, her eyes serious and sober, unlike mine were. She wanted to kiss me! I was going to die now in this seat, not from anyone else, other than this unbelievable moment.
I licked my lips and nodded, leaning in as well. I know we were in a crowded bar, but it felt like were the only ones. I couldn't help it but to have butterflies in my stomach.
She closed the distance with her cold hard lips, and suddenly I was kissing Rosalie. I took her hand in my lap and deepened the kiss.
I could taste her smell on my lips. She tasted like warm honey, and I sighed softly as she intertwined her fingers with mine.
Suddenly she pulled away and looked away.
I was blinking rapidly at it had happened so softly and yet so fast at the same time. I was almost flabbergasted at what had happened.
Before I could even realize what had just happened, the bartender was right there "Nice." He smirked at Rosalie "You girls want more drinks? They're on the house if you do that again." I suddenly felt sick to my stomach. Someone was dirtying such a romantic moment. People were disgusting.
"No. We have to go." Rosalie stood up and left me at the bar, walking away, fast.
I stood up and almost fell to the ground. I hadn't stood up since I sat down to have the shots, and my head was suddenly too dizzy, and I felt like I was going to be sick. I still managed to follow Rosalie out to the car, in her almost inhuman speed.
"Bella, I-" Rosalie started to say, but didn't finish what she was saying as I started to vomit next to car. It wasn't romantic anymore or beautiful. I felt so dizzy and so sick, as I ran after her, that my stomach had caught up to me.
She rushed to my side and pulled my hair away until I was done. After I felt so icky that I felt like crying. I had ruined this night.
"Come sit in the car Bella. But if you get sick, please tell me so I can pull over okay?" I internally smiled at her love for her car. It was quite expensive and beautifully build. Obviously she wouldn't want to ruin it with human vomit.
I nodded at her request and sat down. Just as soon as I hit the seat, I fell asleep.
"What vision Alice? I don't understand." I heard Rose say silently. I didn't open my eyes yet as I was just listening in on her, which I shouldn't do "I am with her now… No. I can't take her to the house now."
At that I opened my eyes. What had happened that required me to the house… And why didn't Rosalie want me to be there.
Rosalie whipped her head in my direction to check if I was awake and turned back to the road, driving with one hand on the wheel and one hand on her phone "I think it's best to wait for morn-"
"As if!" I said, "I want to know Rose." I told her in a stern voice, the kiss suddenly forgotten, betrayal evident in my voice.
"Fine. We are coming to the house." She said tight lipped and put her phone down.
We didn't speak the rest of the ride home, a weird energy between us brewing.
The kiss! Oh shit. She regrets it, I know it.
I was probably asleep for a while, since we were pulling in the Cullen drive way.
Carlisle was out on the porch, ready to greet us. As I stepped out of Rose's red beautiful car, Carlisle was speaking "We honored your wish Bella. I hope we weren't disturbing you." He looked between Rosalie and me. I turned to Rosalie looking at her fingers, and not making eye contact neither with me nor him.
All thee of us entered the house and all of them were sitting at the table. Esme looked the most distraught. If she could, I believe she would be green, sick with worry. What was happening? I didn't say anything I just sat down. I really hoped I didn't have any vomit in my hair or on my clothes. I was a sure I looked like a mess. I felt like one as well. But it was human, and I had wanted the experience, even if it ended with me being sick.
"It's the Volturi." Alice spoke up. I heard Edward growl, but I ignored it, hoping it wasn't at Rosalies thoughts of what had happened.
"What about them?" I asked stupidly.
"Sweety…" This time it was Esme who spoke up "They have not decided to give you a year… but a month or so."
My head was spinning for the second time this evening, but not from alcohol. I stood up. "No." I managed to say.
I looked around the table. Everyone was looking at me in pity. God, it was painful. I will just have to get over it, but I couldn't just let it go. I couldn't let go of my humanity. Not yet. Not in a month.
I looked at Rose. And suddenly I was angry with her. She tried to keep this information from me.
"You didn't want me to know." I shook my head "You are like the rest of them." I felt tears in my eyes "I just don't understand why you hate me so much!" I screamed at Rosalie, not able to take it anymore.
"You still don't get it do you!" She snarked back at me, leaving me alone in the room, wondering, with the rest of her family. It was something new again – her storming out.
The family was silent at our outburst. And it didn't help that my head was starting to throb.
I looked back at Carlisle, the voice of the family "How much time we have?"
He nodded "About a month and a half, not more. We should decide now what we are going to do."
I kind if wished I had listened to Rosalie, because I didn't want to think about the details of my fake death so I can have my real death in peace. But I went and sat back down.
"What have you come up with?" They probably already had a plan, seeing as they were ready for most things in life, even this bizarre case.
This time, Jasper spoke up "We were thinking, you were going to drive somewhere, perhaps to your friends place, and we will make it like you had another rode accident, this time, your car would be in water. They will look for a body but won't find one. They will have to announce your death in a week." I looked at Alice and she nodded.
I didn't want to ever think about how heart broken Charlie would be. I shouldn't have had been drinking. I felt bile rise back up again, and rushed to the bathroom, none of the vampires needed to use.
After I was done, I was just sitting on the floor, mortified that everyone could hear me, and terrified of how I would die.
I wanted to go home.
I walked out, wondering who would take me home, since Rosalie was no longer an option. Before I could ask them, Carlisle stood up "I'll take you home. Let's go. We can decide on a day later. You still have time."
I nodded, in denial of my sudden fate, and followed him out to the garage, to his black Mercedes.
When we were in his car, and far enough out of the hear shot of anyone from the house, he spoke up "Bella. I am so sorry for what my family has put you through. There are no words."
I was too tired to be mad at Carlisle and so I just nodded.
"I'm glad you and Rosalie are friends." That made me ears perk up and heart skip a beat. I wish he hadn't noticed but his vampire abilities were still there the last I checked, and I knew he noticed.
"I don't think we are friends anymore, after tonight."
"Don't be silly. Friends can fight. Everyone can. It doesn't mean the end."
I nodded, thinking about it. It was true. Perhaps I was just emotional about my sudden death "Perhaps, you're right."
There was silence between us as he drove me home. Rosalie didn't deserve what I said to her. I was sure now that she wanted me to have a good night, from my existential dread. She meant good and I was such a bitch to her. Unnecessarily so. Is still couldn't believe that we had kissed. It was so soft and beautiful and nice, even though there was a creepy bartender around. I wanted to keep kissing her, and even more so than ever I wanted something more with her.
I was painfully aware that I wanted more with her, but I wasn't sure if she would want that, and what had that kissed meant to her. She was with Emmett still, and I wasn't sure where he fit in this picture.
"You're good for one another." Carlisle said suddenly. It will be alright. He said as he pulled up to my house.
"Umm… Yeah… She is a great friend." I stuttered.
She smiled at me but didn't say anything. Did he know? I blushed at the though.
"Thank you for taking me home." I said and quickly go out of his car and went home, so I could shower and sleep, try to forget the hurt and focus on the good.
Charlie wasn't awake when I got in and I was grateful. I don't want to dirty up my imagine by being the wild child for the last month or so of my life.
The shower was good to me, it sobered and freshened me up. It was just what I needed. I was stills tunned I had kissed Rosalie tonight. I knew I was falling for her. Hard. That's why I felt to guilty about lashing out at her. I looked at myself in the mirror. It wa shard to believe that this was my life, the duality of it. I was facing death in more unstoppable way than anyone of my peers, and I was falling madly in love with a taken woman. Perhaps it was the dread of death that made me want to build something with her.
The truth was I was going to die, but I was going to be reborn. It was scary still, sad as hell that everyone in my life would be losing me and I will have to live with knowing I broke my parents hearts, but I might not lose Rosalie.
I went out of the bathroom, fully intending to text her or call her to apologize. I didn't know what I was going to say, but I was going to make it right. She knew what I was going through – she understood. She cared. Now I got what she was saying. She kissed me back, damn it!
But when I entered my room, I was well aware that I didn't have to contact her. She was already here.
"I'm sorry. It is incredibly creepy of me to be in your bedroom, but I needed to say I'm sorry."
"No!" I walked to her and kneeled down to where she was sitting on my bed "I am the one who needs to be sorry."
I took her hands I mine "I wish I had listened to you and not gone there tonight. I know what you were trying to do – thank you."
She smiled "You are wonderful." She spoke and I blushed a deep red. She leaned down and suddenly we were kissing once again, her lips moving in sync with mine, our hands intertwined like they were before. Only this time, no one will trouble us.
AN – hey! If you like this story, give me some love! There is something very nice coming in the next chapter!
