Sorry about the delay with the chapter. It was a bit difficult for me to write because...well you'll see. But let me know if it's absolutely terrible! Also, thank you guys so much for showing this story love!
Despite Beth pestering me for half of the night, it was really comforting that she spent the night with me. We went out and got ice cream after Pops left, and like she promised she questioned me about everything between me and Clint. But there wasn't much to tell. Nothing had happened.
That's what Beth was so captured by. She said nothing had happened, yet. She was so sure that something was going to happen. And soon.
I told her she was insane. I wasn't even sure Clint liked me. Beth told me to stop being such an idiot. She said he was clearly enamored with me, just from the little things I told her.
I questioned why Clint, being an Avenger, would be remotely attracted to me. It baffled my brain! He was handsome, smart, funny, athletic. He was a literal freaking superhero.
He could have anyone he wanted.
Not to be all self-deprecating, but I didn't think I was his type. A goofy, Disney obsessed history nerd with pale skin, curly hair, glasses, and curves?
He could get supermodels, CEOs, other gorgeous superheroes if he wanted.
Beth was ready to slap me because of all the negative comments I was making about myself. She even pressed me into making a bet. She bet me five bucks that Clint and I would kiss by the end of the month.
I replied to her saying I had only had to wait three more weeks till I got my five dollars.
As much as I rolled my eyes that night it was good to have her near me. Just to have someone around. My incident with Ted last night left me jumpy and paranoid the next morning even though I knew he was in police custody.
After Beth left I didn't fully exhale and feel safe until I got to work, knowing I'd be safe there. At work, however, I got a pleasant surprise. Apparently the editor for the Smithsonian Magazine had taken it upon herself to pass my article around. I was getting praise all day. Much to my shocked, embarrassed amazement.
Much to the dismay of my boss Diana, her boss Jude came and personally commended me on the piece. I was humbled, and thankful, though a little worried about what Diana would do as petty revenge in the near future. That would be fun.
While at work I breathed a little easier when I received a call from Officer Madison officially letting me know that Ted had gone before a judge and was sentenced to 90 days in the county jail. It was a temporary relief off my shoulders for the next three months.
Still, when I was leaving work and making my way home I was constantly checking over my shoulder. The paranoia still present. I hated myself for it. I hated feeling weak. For allowing Ted to affect me and get under my skin.
It was like a curse.
He was a curse.
Someone I couldn't get rid of no matter how hard I tried.
And believe me. I've tried.
I wondered what my life would be like in ten years, in twenty years. Would I still be looking over my shoulder for him when I was in my forties?
God, I hoped not.
Clint had stayed for breakfast at the compound but left soon after. He was eager to leave and get back to D.C. and he knew everyone could tell. Though everyone kept their comments to a minimum. He had Nat and Steve to thank for that.
He was a bit disappointed to leave everyone, but he was looking forward to getting back home.
And he knew why.
It was due to a certain historian living next door.
Clint said his goodbyes, even managing to give Wanda hug, and the promise to come back up soon for a weekend when everyone was free.
The drive back to D.C. was long but manageable, making good time by getting back just before five in the evening.
Coming to his apartment he glanced at Dot's door but knew she wouldn't be home yet. Hell, he didn't even know if she went to work after what happened with Ted yesterday but he wasn't going to go over yet.
He needed to be patient. More importantly, he needed to figure out what the hell he was going to do.
Should he just outright ask her out? Should he gauge the situation more? Should he ask her how she felt?
Jesus this is why he didn't do dating and relationships. He was a mess with them. He joked around and flirted, but it somehow became more serious and real when he realized that holy crap, he actually liked Dot.
Clint felt like he was back in school. Trying to ask a girl to the prom or something.
And then what if she said no?
What if he had been completely reading the situation wrong the entire time? He'd feel like a damn fool. Clint didn't think he could continue to live next to her if that happened. It would be way too awkward and humiliating.
His head began to spin with so many scenarios.
What if they went out and it was awful? What if they didn't click? What if they clicked but broke up in the end?
How could he tell her about who he really was? How would she react? Would she hate him for lying to her?
Clint closed his eyes and tried to push everything from his head. He wished he could go out and climb the rooftops. He just needed to rest and reset his mind.
He'd close his eyes for a few minutes and try to relax.
When he opened his eyes his watch read almost six-thirty.
Shit. He'd fallen asleep.
Clint supposed going through a million different scenarios involving the woman you liked, took a lot out of you.
Getting up Clint was sure Dot was home by now and it would be acceptable to drop by and say a friendly hello…he thought?
Scrubbing his face he went into the bathroom and tried to fix his hair the best he could before thinking to himself,
Jesus what was wrong with him.
He changed into a black t-shirt with a red flannel over it and walked out of his bedroom. He stopped in front of his balcony doors and took a breath.
Clint had faced far worse things on thousands of occasions.
…though none came to mind at the moment.
God damnit!
He just needed to suck it up and just go over there.
Any second now…...
I felt the need to make dinner for a change considering all of the takeout I had been consuming lately. Plus I could take leftovers to work and have them serve as lunch for the rest of the week.
With my iPod connected to my speaker, I was in the middle of cutting red potatoes when I heard a knock on my balcony doors.
Thank God no one could see me because I jumped about a foot in the air. Clearly still demonstrating that my anxiety was still high.
Thanks again Ted.
Stepping out into my living room I was excited, if slightly confused to see Clint standing there, back so soon.
Walking over to the door I opened it and said "Clint, hi!" Smiling at him.
"Hey, how are you?" He politely asked me with a tiny smile.
"Good, good," I said.
"I'm surprised to see you back so soon." Confessing to him "Did everything go okay with your visit?" Asking him as I stepped aside and gestured for him to come in.
"Thank you." He said to me "It went really well. I just wanted to get back, but I promised I would visit again soon. It was great to see everyone. It helped a lot." He told me.
"Good I'm glad." Giving him a genuine smile.
"If you're hungry I'm making dinner for a change." Telling him as I gestured to the kitchen.
He smiled "I could eat."
"Great." Smiling back like an idiot.
And we stood there standing like two idiots until I mentally shook my head and went into the kitchen.
Oh Dot.
"Whatcha cooking?" He asked hopping onto a free countertop.
"Baked lemon chicken with rosemary potatoes and carrots." Resuming my chopping.
"Come on I want to hear all about your trip." Lightly pressing him as I continued to cook.
"Not much to tell." Clint shrugged his shoulders.
Oh okay, yeah the Avengers getting together at the Avengers compound. No big deal.
I didn't express that thought though.
"Did you at least have fun?" Asking him.
"I did, it was nice to see everyone again. I even took your advice and talked to Wanda, that's Pietro's sister." He said shyly.
"Really?" Dropping everything and focusing my attention on him "How did it go?" A hopeful look on my face.
"Really well. We were able to talk a bit. It did both of us good to open a dialogue. She wants to be friends." Clint lightly blushed.
"Oh Clint that's fantastic!" Hopping up and down a little "I'm so happy for you." Beaming.
He let out a few chuckles at my antics. But I couldn't help it. This would be so wonderful for him and Wanda.
"How were things here? Anything exciting happen?" He asked me.
Suddenly caught in the spotlight I tried to not let it show "No, nothing new to tell." Stumbling just a tad.
Damn.
There was a brief millisecond of silence before he spoke again, but I caught it nonetheless. It made my skin flood with an embarrassing heat.
He was a master spy. He knew I was lying.
But I wasn't going to tell him about Ted. Not a chance in hell. Clint had enough to deal with. He didn't need to get sucked into my vortex of problems as well.
"No new overnight aquatic bird guests to speak of?" He joked.
Internally I let out a sigh that he decided not to press me on my lie.
"No, none this time." Laughing out as I seasoned the potatoes before popping them into the oven.
I tried not to let my skin itch as I worked on preparing dinner knowing he was watching me and not saying anything.
I had no idea what he was thinking. The only noise came from my speaker.
After a while, Clint said, "I have no idea who half these artists are."
"I can make you a playlist grandpa." Smirking at him as I put the chicken in the oven.
"Ouch. Rude much?" He gasped in mock hurt.
"I have a feeling the ladies have said worse to you." Joking once more as I washed my hands.
"Damn Dot! Are you trying to break my heart!" He exclaimed. This time real shock was on his face and it made me burst out laughing.
"No I'm sorry." Drying my hands, even though the smile was still on my face "Besides I'm not much of the heartbreaker type." Bringing up my subtle self-depreciation.
Turning around I set the timer on the oven.
Instantly I felt someone behind me.
The musky scent told me it was Clint, but then again who else would it be. I didn't even hear him get off the counter and move towards me.
Swallowing the lump in my throat that appeared out of nowhere, I slowly turned around and found myself inches from Clint's face.
"Hello." Feeling a tad bit breathless.
"Hi." He said softly staring down at me. His whole perfect body hovering over me.
I tried swallowing the lump again but my throat was bone dry.
We didn't say anything. All we did was stare at each other and the longer we did that the more nervous and sweaty I became.
Clint's eyes roamed around my face, studying me intently and it made me want to shrink up and crawl into a hole.
I felt so exposed but there was nothing to feel anxious about. All he was doing was staring.
I didn't mind his staring. I just had no idea what he saw that he found so interesting.
Finally, his eyes settled on my lips.
"Dorothy." Clint's voice was low and warm as he flicked his gaze back to my eyes.
I don't think what came out of my mouth could be considered a word. More like a mousey, squeaking sound.
His lips turned slightly upward at the noise. Making me sure I had turned pink.
I turned to duck my head in humiliation, but Clint with his lightning reflexes caught my chin and gently held my face in place.
Totally would be lying if I said I had tried to fight him one bit.
"I'd disagree." He said to me.
My eyebrows furrowed, "What?" Totally thrown for a loop.
"You said you're not the heartbreaker type. I'd disagree." His eyes lasering into me.
"Then you're not as smart as I thought you were." Quietly speaking, staring back.
"I suppose not. Especially if I do this." Clint whispered before closing the inches between us, capturing my lips with his.
His lips were soft and warm. They moved gently against mine. Mimicking movements. It was all slow, nothing rushed. Everything savored.
All the air left my lungs and my head felt fuzzy but I wasn't sure if it was because of the lack of oxygen or from the kiss.
I was going with the kiss.
Much to my disappointment, Clint broke away, but that was probably a good decision since I was starting to feel a tiny bit dizzy.
Struck completely dumb I had nothing to say except to stare up at this handsome man who I had just kissed and pray that I didn't have a slack-jawed expression on my face.
Clint looked down at me, anxious, and afraid. Two things I had never seen from him. Was he regretting kissing me?
The longer I stayed quiet did his anxiety unfold onto his face. Suddenly I realized he was waiting for me to respond.
Clint Barton, the Avenger superhero, was worried about what I thought about the kiss. If I thought it was a mistake.
It broke my heart and took my breath away at the same time.
He looked so vulnerable in a way I didn't think was possible for someone like him.
Steeling my courage I raised myself on my tiptoes and kissed him again. I could feel the surprise when he didn't respond for the first microsecond but then he knew what to do.
Gently he wrapped his arms around my waist pulling me closer. As we kissed sweetly and tenderly I brought my shaking hands to rest on his chest, hoping he wouldn't notice.
Clint broke away and stared down at me. A frown present on his face.
"You're shaking." He said worriedly.
"It's a good kind of shaking." Blushing red. "The kind of shaking that comes from excitement and too many butterflies in the stomach."
Pausing I couldn't believe I said something that stupid "Jesus that sounded so cliché." Dropping my head to his chest to hide my mortification.
I felt Clint's laughter as it shook his chest, jostling me up and down. His arms tightened around my waist.
"No, it was adorable." Feeling him kiss my hair.
"You're just saying that to make me feel better." Snuggling closer into him, letting his scent completely overwhelm me. Not caring if it was clouding my senses. It was a pleasant way to cloud my mind.
We stayed intertwined together for a few minutes. Contented, happy, cautiously optimistic silence filling the air around us.
But something kept nagging at the back of my head. Screaming to get out even though it was going to wreck everything.
"Clint there is something I need to tell you and when you hear it you might regret…well, I'm not entirely sure what you were looking to do other than kiss me, or if you just wanted to kiss me." Flustering out with my nerves going every which way.
Picking my head up I looked at him. He patiently waited for me to get my ramble out of my system.
"I mean I-" Trying to get the words out but they were sticking in my throat "The thing is-"
Tears sprung to my eyes as I began to get frustrated that I couldn't just spit it out and say it.
"Hey, it's okay you don't have to tell me." Clint moved his arms to my neck and was cradling my face in his warm hands trying to soothe me.
"No I do because it's a big deal." Croaking out and I roughly wiped away my tears feeling weak. But more only took their place.
Freaking damnit!
"Im-you're attractive. Nope, strike that. You're damn handsome." Attempting to crack a joke "I'm not so naive and stupid to think that a guy with your looks and personality and charm would be a monk and never have gone out or been with a woman." Saying but it was all a jumble and I knew I wasn't making sense. That was evident by the confusion on his face.
Closing my eyes I took a breath and tried to sort my mind.
"What I'm saying is that I might not have as much experience as you would. I've only ever been in two relationships, and I'm…I'm still a virgin." Choking down my humiliation.
His eyes went so wide I would have literally given my soul to have the earth open and swallow me whole.
The shame of my confession overflowed through me from the tips of my fingers down to my toes.
"And it's not a religious thing or anything like that. It's just I haven't met someone who I trusted, respected, and loved enough to be with like that, and I know some guys don't like being with an experienced woman. But since I have no idea what you were expecting to happen with us, if you even wanted an us-"
Clint swiftly cut my rambling off as he bent down and kissed me.
This kiss was different than our first two. This one was filled with reassurance and tones of passion. It made me breathless as I stood on my tiptoes bunching his shirt in my fists to grasp onto him as much as possible.
When we broke apart my cheeks were definitely flushed as I tried to control my breathing.
Clint brought our foreheads together. I noticed his pupils were larger than before. Seeing his eyes like that sent a shiver through me.
"I don't care Dorothy." Was all he said.
"But…you're, you're-" I stopped myself when I almost said the word.
Avenger.
But that's what he was. He was a whole-class above me.
"Stop." He gently shushed me "I do not care Dot." He stroked my cheeks "I am not looking to get you into bed Dorothy. I want to get to know you more. I want to go out with you and go from there."
Tears sprung to my eyes again only this time it wasn't from frustration and anger at myself. Staring into his eyes all I saw was sincerity but still, I was holding myself back.
Afraid.
Reaching up I put my hands over his.
"Please don't break me." Whispering out in raw emotion.
Clint raised his head and kissed my forehead.
Dropping my head back into his chest I let it go.
I didn't analyze and point out that Clint never answered me.
I wasn't sure how to feel about that.
