Chapter 7
Darcy paced back and forth upon the carpet in the library in frustration. For three days he had resided in the same house as Miss Elizabeth and still had had no luck in restoring her memories or even improving her opinion of him. He had tried everything possible without using his magic, an option he was beginning to seriously consider. Yet he knew that to do so in the present household was simply too risky. Despite all his efforts to rid himself of the woman, Miss Bingley had been extra attentive to him ever since Miss Elizabeth's arrival. The thought that he should not have mentioned his admiration of Miss Elizabeth's eyes to the lady crossed his agitated mind yet again.
Sighing, Darcy stopped in front of the window and gazed out while running a hand through his hair. Unable to process the view outside, he silently contemplated how fruitless his efforts thus far had been. Although he admitted that the discussion he held with Miss Elizabeth her first evening at Netherfield could have gone better, he was reluctant to acknowledge the fact that indeed it had been the best.
The morning following their discussion on the required accomplishments of a lady, Mrs. Bennet had arrived with her two youngest, and silliest, daughters in order to assess her eldest's condition for herself. Despite his distaste for the woman's mannerisms and opinions, especially as regarded her daughters and Miss Elizabeth in particular, he had eagerly attempted to join in the conversation. This effort, unfortunately, merely gave Mrs. Bennet cause to show her own dislike for Darcy; apparently the opinion of the neighborhood towards him was worse than he thought if this was how Mrs. Bennet treated his attempt at civility. Although Miss Elizabeth had stepped in and attempted to correct her mother's misconceptions of his words, Darcy had not missed the amusement in her eyes at his expense.
If Darcy had thought that it could not get any worse than Miss Elizabeth's amusement at her mother's insults towards him, he would have found himself to be very disappointed. Since then, he had attempted on multiple occasions to converse with her, all of which ended up in near heated disagreements. Hoping to catch her alone, he had attempted to escape the house for a walk around the same time she usually took hers, only to end up being accompanied by Miss Bingley and her disparagements towards the Bennet's, a conversation he knew to have been overheard by Miss Elizabeth. At one point he had even asked her to dance with him to which she had denied him much to her own amusement.
Slamming his fist against the window frame, Darcy cursed her insolent attitude. How could he apologize if she refused to hear him out let alone understand what he wished to say? Only the night before he had tried to compliment her by insinuating that he found her figure pleasing to the eye. In return, she retaliated by pointed out his flaws before the entire company gathered and proceeded to laugh at him. Her teasing he had slowly learned to accept and love over the years, but her laughter at his expense was insupportable.
Brushing away a single tear, Darcy asked himself why the woman he loved was so intent on hating him.
At that moment, Darcy's reverie was broken by the sounds of Miss Bingley asking a nearby footman if he had seen her brother's friend. Not wishing to have his solitude interrupted by the woman he had at last succeeded at avoiding that morning, Darcy placed a barricade around himself that would allow him to stand there unnoticed by anyone passing by. A moment later, the lady entered the library calling his name in a sickly sweet voice. Knowing that to remain unseen he must not move, Darcy unconsciously held his breath and prayed that she would leave the room.
Miss Bingley, however, seemed in no rush to leave. Having wandered around the room looking in all the many places a person of his size could hide, she turned to the small table by the chair he had been sitting in. Running her long bony finger along the edge of his half filled wine glass, she continued to let her gaze search the room for him. Disappointment written clearly all over her face, she slowly reached down to pick up his neglected book. Darcy watched as she carelessly began flipping pages, stopping every so often to read a sentence or two. Eventually she all but threw the book back down on the table and with disgust mumbled to herself, "improvement of one's mind by extensive reading indeed."
"Caroline! I was wondering where you had gone off to," Mrs. Hurst said as she entered the room. "That was most unkind of you to leave me with the Miss Bennet's. Pray tell me why you are in the library of all places. I would not have thought you even knew where this room was located," she said looking around in surprise.
"Forgive me, Louisa, but I could not stand another minute in Miss Eliza's tedious company. I very much regret agreeing to Charles' insistence that our carriage would not be available for their use until after services tomorrow."
"I must say, I am still at a loss to understand why you did agree. I thought you were most anxious to send our guests home."
"I am indeed, Louisa," Caroline said. "But how could I not agree with our brother when Mr. Darcy was standing there witnessing the whole affair? You are aware of how hard I have been acting in order to show him that I would be a most proper and attentive Mistress of Pemberley, are you not?"
At her words, Darcy struggled not to voice his disgust to the idea of the woman managing his home. He was certain that if she were ever to gain such a position, he would lose his entire staff within a week; a most humorous and disturbing thought as he would be lost without his loyal servants.
"Indeed I am very much aware of your interest in the gentleman," Mrs. Hurst continued. "I assume that is why I have found you here?"
"Of course it is Louisa! Do not be such a simpleton." Miss Bingley snapped. "I cannot allow Mr. Darcy to fall prey to Miss Eliza's artifices. While he may find her fine eyes alluring, he has made it plain for all to see the last few evenings that he does not care for her impertinence and poor upraising."
Shocked, Darcy nearly stumbled backwards into the window sill before remembering that he must not move. He wondered if that was truly the opinion he had given the others after his attempts to converse with Miss Elizabeth. He thought he had been making good attempts towards reconciling with her, but according to Miss Bingley, Miss Elizabeth was not the only person who willfully misunderstood all that he had said. Despair began to overcome him as he realized that he had only made his goal of helping her recover her memories much more difficult to achieve. All he wanted was to show her that he cared about her opinions and intellect, but he had once again failed.
Suddenly realizing that he had been so lost in his thoughts he had missed a good portion of the sisters' conversation, he became quite alarmed upon seeing Mrs. Hurst headed directly towards him. While his barrier protected him from being noticed, it would not, however, keep him hidden if another person came into physical contact with him. Closing his eyes, Darcy hoped that she would stop her advance or turn before running into him.
"You cannot seriously be suggesting, Louisa, that Mr. Darcy has left the library via the window? What a horrid idea to imagine such a proper gentleman acting in such a manner." For the first time in their acquaintance, Darcy was thrilled to hear Miss Bingley's condescending tone as it had successfully stopped her sister mere inches from his chest. As Mrs. Hurst turned to walk back towards her younger sister, Darcy quickly released the breath he had not realized he had held.
"I am simply at a loss, Caroline, as to how else Mr. Darcy could have left the library unseen by anyone. If it were not for his book and that glass of wine sitting there, I would have thought the footman to be very much mistaken."
Stomping her foot in disappointment, Miss Bingley looked upon her sister in sudden understanding. "Oh why did you not say so before, Louisa? Of course the footman was mistaken. How did I not see that? Surely Mr. Darcy must have left the library in a great hurry and the man simply missed his exit. I dare say this would not have happened if Charles had heeded my advice and hired only servants from town. These local country folk simply cannot be trusted." Ignoring her sister's exasperation, Miss Bingley continued. "Indeed I am sure Mr. Darcy will return shortly. I will simply wait here for his return. When he enters he will see me enjoying the pleasures of a book and I am sure will be most pleased."
Chuckling inwardly, Darcy watched in amusement as Mrs. Hurst instead convinced her sister that he might be gone awhile and that she was in need of her company for herself; after all, Miss Bennet had returned upstairs to rest while her own sister left for yet another walk in the gardens. Miss Bingley reluctantly followed her sister from the room while commenting meanly upon Miss Elizabeth's penchant for long walks. Darcy, meanwhile listened, waiting for the sisters to travel further from his hideout. Guilt and amusement, however, battled within him as he heard Miss Bingley reprimand the footman for not paying close enough attention to his post.
When he was assured that the sisters would not be returning to the library, Darcy breathed a sigh of relief and turned once more to the window letting his barrier drop. Wishing for the days when he could simply shrink to a smaller size and thus hide easier, Darcy heard the entrance of the footman and turned in time to see the startled look upon the poor man's face.
"Mr. Darcy, sir. Pray forgive me for the intrusion, sir. I understood you to have left the room." The footman bowed low and began to look uncomfortably around the room.
Wishing to ease the man's discomfort, Darcy nodded to the footman with a slight smile. "It is of no consequence, Carson. Indeed it was my intention to escape Miss Bingley's notice. I rejoice in my unexpected success. I only hope she was not too harsh with you."
Darcy had watched as the man's eyebrows rose in shocked pleasure. He had not failed to notice that none of the Bingley's had attempted to learn the names of the lesser staff members while it was a necessary duty in Darcy's opinion. He had learned that the sooner one learned a servant's name the sooner one would gain said servants loyalty. He had served many different masters over the years himself, thus Darcy knew that the only families worth working for were those who took the time to learn his name.
"No sir, I thank you," the footman responded with a hesitant smile of his own.
"Very good, I am glad to hear that. I would hate for my strange disappearance to have been a source of trouble for you."
If the man had been shocked before, it was nothing to what he showed after hearing Darcy's kind words. Although the Netherfield staff had known that Mr. Darcy was a kind and understanding man, they had also heard from town that he was a proud and arrogant one. To find that he worried about his employment was truly unexpected. Never before had the footman been treated such.
Wishing to leave Darcy to his solitude once again, not to mention share news of his solicitous behavior with the other servants, the footman bowed low again and asked in a stuttering voice, "is...is there anything...may I help you in any way, Mr. Darcy, sir."
Regretting the man's sudden hesitance and discomfort, Darcy simply shook his head and thanked him. As he turned to leave though, Darcy called him back. "Perhaps you would be so kind, Carson, as to fetch me a fresh glass of wine?" At the footman's confused glance at the glass on the table still containing drink, Darcy chuckled and added with a wide grin, "preferably a glass that has not been fondled by Miss Bingley, if you please."
As comprehension dawned upon the footman, he nervously looked up at Darcy and let out a slight chuckle of his own. Upon seeing Darcy's pleased countenance, Carson grinned and promised to return soon with a new glass. Darcy thanked the man and then dismissed him as he turned yet again to the window. It did not take long for Carson to return with the fresh wine and Darcy was once more left in solitude.
Staring unseeingly at his reflection in the window, Darcy sipped his wine reflecting on all he had just learned from the conversation between Miss Bingley and her sister. It was apparent that he had a lot more to do to gain Miss Elizabeth's favor than he thought. What a muddled mess he found himself in, he contemplated. If only he could find a way to guarantee a few minutes alone with her. Alas, propriety dictated that that was not acceptable.
When Darcy had first received his memories, he was excited at the prospect of being a gentleman as it would afford him greater opportunity and freedom to search for Iliana. Now that he had finally found her and had insulted her, he found his status more of a hindrance than a help. Although it was true that he had to answer to no one but himself, he was unfortunately bound by the rules of propriety as long as Miss Elizabeth remained ignorant of her true identity. It would be much simpler to be alone with her if he was not a gentleman.
With a chuckle he recalled a time, almost two hundred years ago now, when he had been nothing more than a shop boy and she a local chambermaid. She had been sent one afternoon by the cook of the great house she was employed at, to return a newly delivered package of meat that was spoilt. From the moment she had entered the shop, he could not help but follow her with his eyes. As she left, he had discretely pulled her aside to tell her how enchanting she looked. She had blushed most becomingly and for several weeks, the two were able to meet often as he helped her to regain her memories. Although they were both bound by their master's schedules, no one thought their meeting alone was improper.
What such simple lives servants led. Darcy was well aware that there were many out there who begrudged their station in life, although he felt no compassion for them. If only they realized that in many ways they had so much more freedom than those of the landed gentry. Every move of his was always watched carefully, every word he uttered broken apart for study. No one truly cared about what a servant did unless it affected their service. They were not bound to act as propriety dictated; yet another curse he must now bear.
With that thought, Darcy decided that there was nothing he could do now, as Miss Elizabeth seemed determined to avoid him at all costs. He would simply wait, continue to attempt to converse with her, and take the first opportunity she allowed him to heartily apologize to her. He realized that until then there was no point to his moping around the library; he might as well continue to read.
As he began to head back towards his chair, however, Darcy felt as though someone was watching him. Seeing no one else in the library, he looked back out the window searching the grounds. Disconcerted, he saw no one, yet the feeling remained. Someone was out there, and although he could not see who it was, he knew that they could see him. Fear began to course through his veins as he realized that whoever it was could only be of magical blood. He knew that both he and Iliana had been watched over throughout all their lifetimes, but neither had seen another magical being since their first death well over a millennium ago. However, whoever was now watching him, was no ordinary person, but one of great power. Thoughts and speculations began to flood his mind, none of them of any comfort, as to who was out there and what they could possibly want. Whoever it was, it did not bode well for him and Iliana.
A sound from behind him made him jump as he turned around. Struggling to calm down his fast beating heart, he looked into the shocked hazel eyes of Miss Elizabeth. She was clutching a book to her chest and looked just as surprised to see him there.
"Pardon me, Mr. Darcy," she said with a small curtsey, "I did not see you there. I am sorry for startling you so."
Bowing in return, Darcy almost spilled the wine in his hand having forgotten he still held it. "It is of no matter Miss Bennet. Please do not worry yourself on my behalf. I am afraid I was too lost in my own thoughts and thus did not hear your entrance."
"In that case, sir, I beg you would excuse me; I would not wish to disturb your privacy."
Not wishing for her to leave, Darcy quickly reassured her that he would warmly welcome her company. With a raised eyebrow, she considered him for a moment before seating herself on the sofa. Sending a small comforting smile in her direction, he sat down in the chair that he had abandoned earlier and setting down his wine glass, picked up his book. Darcy watched over the top of his book as she regarded him with a confused expression before settling in to enjoy her own book.
Unable to concentrate on anything other than the young woman sitting across from him, Darcy hadn't failed to notice that his greatest desire had come to pass. After three days, he found himself alone with Miss Elizabeth. A small movement outside in the hallway caught his attention briefly as he noticed that Carson had moved to a new position so that the two of them would not be left completely un-chaperoned. Silently muttering to himself, Darcy once more cursed the fact that he was a gentleman and as such he could not be alone with her in the way he desired, in the way he needed to help her remember; ridiculous propriety.
"I'm sorry, Mr. Darcy. Did you say something?"
"I beg your pardon, Miss Bennet. I was mumbling to myself. I am sorry to have disturbed your reading." He watched as she attempted to hide her smile. "Have I said something to amuse you Miss Bennet?" he asked in confusion.
He watched as she raised her sparkling eyes to meet his and his heart skipped a beat. "I was merely contemplating the fact that you seemed to be merely repeating my own words from earlier."
Chuckling quietly he replied, "So it would seem. Although I hope that by doing so you do not take what I have said to be insincere."
Nodding seriously, she quickly returned her attention back towards her book. Not wishing to discompose her further, Darcy attempted to do the same but again could not keep his attention from wandering back to her. Knowing that this might be his last chance to talk to her for a while, he began to address her when she interrupted him.
"Mr. Darcy, I was under the impression that you were in the library seeking solitude. Indeed that is the reason I came here myself. If, however, you are in want of conversation, I believe you can find the other ladies in the front parlor."
Struggling to contain his frustration, he nodded sharply and returned to his book. For half an hour the two sat there, in silence. One seemed content to read while the other merely gave the appearance of understanding what was in front of him. When she finally stood up to leave, he stood as well to bow and regretfully watched her walk away. Unwilling to lose his last chance, however, he quickly made a rash decision and moved into action.
.
.
.
Elizabeth wanted nothing more than to leave Netherfield. For three days she had been attending her sister all while attempting to deal with the residents of the house. Mr. Bingley was the only occupant with whom Elizabeth could feel at ease with as he seemed truly delighted in her company. Miss Bingley and Mrs. Hurst took every opportunity available to let her know of their low opinion of her and her family, while Mr. Hurst did not deem her worthy of his attention. Mr. Darcy, on the other hand, was an enigma she wished to avoid.
She had been truly shocked upon that first evening when he had initiated a conversation with her and the fury she felt at his assumptions of her preferences increased her dislike of the man. She did not understand why the man continued over the following days to attempt to converse with her, and she was not ignorant of his efforts at finding a moment alone with her. The man had made it very clear that he disliked her as much as she did him. Yet despite this knowledge, she could not stop her heart from skipping a beat every time she looked upon him.
Elizabeth had always been in control of her emotions, and to feel at a loss whenever Mr. Darcy was around deeply unsettled her. Everyday found her anxiety to return home increasing at a rapid rate.
That afternoon, when she had entered the library, it was not until she had already selected a book that she noticed the tall handsome man standing by the window. He was a stranger to her, yet there was something familiar about his stance as he searched the view beyond the window. When he turned around in shock at her arrival, Elizabeth was mortified to discover the man she had been admiring was none other than the proud and disagreeable Mr. Darcy. She had been so sure that he had been someone else before he turned around. She began to berate herself for reading too many novels during Jane's convalescence.
After a few minutes of uncomfortable conversation, Elizabeth took a seat and watched as he took his. Wishing to ignore the man's presence she eagerly lost herself in her book only to be shortly distracted by his mumbling. Not sure if he had been addressing her or not, she inquired as to what he had said. She soon began to amuse herself with his discomfort, until he stated that his apology was indeed sincere. She again began to read.
Frustration with the man soon overcame her when she heard his address. Not wishing to have yet another heated argument with him, she was quick to cut him off and warn him of her desire for solitude. Disappointed that he simply nodded instead of leaving the room, she tried yet again to read.
Although she soon lost herself in the pages of the story, she was not unaware of the gentleman's constant gaze. When she had finished her second chapter, she decided she could take no more of his disconcerting presence and decided she would fare better with Mr. Bingley's sisters. As she turned to leave, however, the room around her distorted and she found Mr. Darcy blocking her way.
Not wanting to have a confrontation with the man, she tried to move around him only to discover she was unable to move any part of her body. She then tried to open her mouth to voice her displeasure and realized that she had no voice. Looking quickly behind him, she saw that the footman right outside the door seemed frozen in time, his hand raised halfway to straighten his jacket. Turning scared eyes back towards Mr. Darcy, she saw a sad smile upon his face.
"Miss Elizabeth, I beg of you to listen to me please. I simply wish to apologize for my slight at the assembly. I did not recognize you for who you truly are, and as such, did not want to raise your expectations of me. I immediately realized my error and have since wished to form an understanding with you. You are the most handsome woman of my acquaintance and I wish daily for your forgiveness."
Elizabeth could hardly believe what she was hearing. Her stomach was dancing and her heart was beating so fast she was sure he could hear it. A small part of her mind began to rejoice in his words as she watched his blue eyes started to shine with silver flecks and his hand rose to cup her cheek. She knew she should stop him, but she still found herself unable to move as joyful warmth began to spread through her body. Those eyes, she knew those eyes, had seen them before; they promised love and comfort. Suddenly her mouth was captured by his in a gentle kiss, and she felt as though she was about to explode with happiness.
As he began to pull away from her, she felt control beginning to return to her body. She wanted nothing more than to wrap her arms around his neck and pull him back towards her. Rubbing his thumb along her chin he leaned down towards her ear and whispered, "Please, my Ellette, come back to me. I need you, my love."
A sudden fear overcame her as she heard his words and a loud voice reverberated in her head. "No! The time is not right. Do not give in, do not remember." She knew that voice but could not place it; such a deep voice filled with pain. Immediately the warmth and happiness she had felt left her and she watched as Mr. Darcy's eyes turned to a dark blue filled with despair.
Just as suddenly as he had appeared before her, he was gone and the room once more became focused. She watched as the footman reached up to adjust his jacket as though nothing unusual had occurred. Panicked, she turned around to see Mr. Darcy still rising from his bow with a puzzled look in his light blue eyes.
"Is everything all right, Miss Bennet?" he asked in a cold voice.
Shaking her head, she turned and all but ran from the room and the confusing man. As she rushed upstairs towards her room, she began to calm. Surely she had simply imagined the whole thing as there was no possible way Mr. Darcy could control time like that nor feel that way about her; it was not possible the man could have kissed her.
Determined to forget the incident, Elizabeth entered her room and threw the novel she had been reading upon her bed. How could she have been such a simpleton to allow such fancies into her head? Indeed she would be sure to endure her father's amusement at her expense if he ever found out about her short fancy. It was all Mr. Darcy's fault anyways; the man affected her in ways she could not understand.
Having finally calmed herself down and realizing it was nothing more than an impossible daydream, she turned towards a mirror to check her appearance before rejoining the ladies downstairs. She froze in shock at the sight of tears streaming steadily down her face.
