Jay had been doing much better in the past six weeks and it was getting closer to the beginning of July, when he and Erin were officially on Furlough. They had decided to drive up after work on the Thursday evening, meaning they would be in Wisconsin for the whole weekend - coming home Monday morning and back at work on the Tuesday. They only had four weeks left to work before they go to the cabin and they were both so excited. The past six weeks had bought them some rough cases, where they were working constantly, Erin's birthday, which is still a tough time for her, so they didn't celebrate properly again this year. Erin had struggled surrounding the days of her birthday, the pain of losing Nadia was hard on her and was still raw. Jay had been a much needed rock for her, he let her deal with her pain in her own way, letting her come to him when she was ready. The team didn't make a huge fuss either, they just acted like any other day, and went for drinks at Molly's. Erin thought that Jay was behind that and she loved him even more for it.
While Erin was hosting girls night at the apartment, Jay and Will decided to go out to Molly's to have a proper catch up. They hadn't spoken much recently, and there was something important that Jay wanted to ask him. They sat down at a table in the corner, so they were not disturbed by anyone. Jay wasn't sure how to go about asking Will what he wanted to, so he began by talking about Will's problems, "How's it going with Nina? You said you two had talked again this week - guess it didn't go so well?"
"Nope," Will sighed, taking another swig of his beer. "She told me today that she had a job offer down in Phoenix… and she wants me to go with her."
Jays eyes widened, not expecting his brother to say that, "Wow… so are you going to go?"
"No... I told her I couldn't do that."
Jay was shocked, he thought Will would've gone to be with her in a heartbeat, "How come? I thought you loved her."
"I do, I really do... but," he sighed, thinking of how to word it. "I feel like coming back to Chicago has been the best thing for me. I love my job now, my friends and not to mention me and you have reconnected properly for the first time in god knows how long."
"You should go, if that's what you want, you should go. Will, I'm so glad we have reconnected but if you love her, you should go. Don't use me as an excuse."
"I'm not, I promise. I just don't want to leave Chicago. You are a big part of that, but you're not the only reason. Just being back here has helped me. You've seen the change in me since I moved here. I feel more at home here than I ever did in New York. I don't want to ruin the progress I've made," Will explained.
"What did Nina say? Have you told her yet?" Jay asked, curiously.
He nodded, "I told her. All of those reasons and I think she understood. I said how you're my little brother and I hadn't been there for you when you really needed me to be there… and I don't want to make the same mistakes as I did. I did say that I didn't want to leave my job, or the city again. Those years I spent away were really rough for me and I don't want to repeat them. I think she thinks Nat is the reason that I'm staying, but she isn't. She wasn't even a factor in my decision… It's just, even if I did go with her, I don't know whether she would ever truly accept that me and Nat were just friends and.." He sighed, "I just think she would always use it in an argument. I truly do love her, but I can't go with her."
"As long as your happy bro, that's all that matters. You know you can stay as long as you like, right?"
Will nodded, "I know, but I'm sure I'm cramping your style. I'm going to start looking for places to rent next week. Now enough about me, I want to know why you bought me out here tonight. I know it's not just because of girls night, because you usually go out for a run… So, what's up?"
"Uhm nothing… I just wanted to spend some time with you," Jay lied, he really didn't know how to bring it up so just stalled.
Will raised his eyebrow, "Seriously? You know I don't believe that right?"
"Why wouldn't you believe it? It's the truth!" Jay lied again.
Will just laughed, "You know that you're a really shit liar, right? You constantly scratch the back of your neck and look down. It's okay, I think I know why you wanted to talk."
Jay's head shot up, "What? You do?"
"It's about Erin, isn't it?" Will asked and when Jay didn't reply, he continued. "You want to ask her to marry you, don't you?"
"How'd…" Jay wondered but Will carried on.
"I just knew because I have sensed a difference in you. You worship the ground she walks on, and she has been such a rock to you over the past few months… I just knew that you want to spend the rest of your life with her. Now I know you probably wouldn't have come to me about this if it wasn't for the whole ring situation," Will said and Jay just sighed. "Jay, mom always said whoever found the girl first can have the ring. I'll get the safety deposit box key from my apartment next week, it's in our safe."
Jay sighed again, "You don't think it's too soon, do you?"
Will shook his head, "No. I really don't. Jay, Erin is the first person you've seriously dated since high school. Now I know you've been with other people in that time, but really she's the only one you've truly fell for. She'd have been the one you bought home to mom, the one who mom would dote on and adore. She's nothing like any of the other girls, and I am so happy for you. Honestly Jay, if you feel it's the right time, then it is. No one can decide that but you."
"I love her so much it's hard to even begin to explain… she's the one who has stuck by me even when I didn't deserve it. She has helped me so much after the whole Abby thing, and my ptsd… She didn't run when things got hard, she let me do what I needed to do, but still was there for me when I was ready to face my demons. To be honest, I don't think I'd have got through all of this without her. I could feel myself spiralling and I couldn't do anything about it. If it wasn't for her, I don't think I'd have come out the other side as well as I have done. I just know something bad would've happened, I'd have been distracted and I'd have probably been shot, or worse, got someone else shot. I just think that now is the right time to ask her, to show her that I'm in this for the long haul," Jay smiled, taking a sip of his beer. "So do you really think mom would've loved her?"
"Hell yeah! She'd probably have loved her more than the two of us! She'd have loved how happy she makes you. Wow, my little brother is growing up! I'm so happy for you man," Will replied, loving seeing how happy his brother was. "Okay, I'm going to get the drinks in - they're on me tonight!" He said, and left the table to go and order some drinks at the bar.
Jay just nodded and grabbed his phone out of his pocket after feeling it buzz, he had three texts from Erin, all of which made him laugh.
Ugh! So jealous of you and Will being at Molly's… I'd give anything to be there and not here - I love the girls to pieces but we are watching the fucking Notebook AGAIN! Hope you and Will are having a good time xxx - Erin
So now we are watching an episode of love island and I have no idea what's going on - please come home and save me! -Erin
Ok so you were rude and didn't reply or come home to save me - it's okay, we have decided to come out to Molly's - it's Cruz's birthday and the fire girls wanted to come and celebrate and me and Kim really fancy a beer. She text Ruz & Kev and they're on their way too so I think most people will be out later! Tony is coming too to see Sylvie cos apparently they're back on again? I think anyway… See you in about twenty minutes x - Erin
Jay chuckled at the texts, he knew how much Erin did love girls night - but usually didn't appreciate a lot of the films they watched - and it seems they had managed to convince her to put Love Island on - a reality show that Erin absolutely despises. He could tell she was ready for a drink, she'd told him earlier today all she wanted to do was spend time with him, have a few drinks and just chill and to be honest, he had wanted that too. They hadn't been together much this past week, he had been partnered with Antonio for most of the week as Erin and Jay's CIs both had information on the case they had been working on so they had often been needed in two different places at the same time, so they partnered up with Antonio and Ruzek. Erin had enjoyed bossing Ruzek around but she had definitely missed her househusband. Jay had really enjoyed working with Antonio too, they worked very well together and had a lot of fun, but if Jay was honestly, he really did miss working with Erin. Their conversations just flowed so naturally and the banter they had was top tier - he had never worked with anyone as well as he had done with Erin, being apart from her this week had made him appreciate her even more. He quickly text her back Adam, tony and kev aren't here yet - so it's just me and Will over at the back table. I'll get you a drink in ready. See you soon xxx -Jay
He smiled at his phone and put it down on the table as Will came over with two bottles of beer and four shots on a tray. "You talking to Erin by any chance?" He asked, placing the tray on the table.
"How di-" Jay begun but Will just laughed.
"Bro, you have this smitten little smile on your face every time you watch her, talk to her or text her. So what she say? Missing you already and can't wait for you to go home?"
Jay just shuck his head, "Shut up. I do not have a look. No, she was telling me that they're coming here in a bit. It's Cruz's birthday so the fire girls wanted to come to celebrate. Kev and Adam are on their way too along with Tony. Please don't say anything about what we just talked about to any of the guys when they get here… I don't want anyone else to know."
"You got it man. Consider it completely forgotten about. I would say consider my mouth zipped but if I did that, I wouldn't be able to drink you under the table," Will teased.
"HA! Yeah, you drink me under the table, I'd love to see you try," Jay replied, grabbing the two tequila shots that were for him. He held one up to Will and said, "Cheers."
"Cheers," Will replied and they both knocked back the shot, quickly followed by the second. A few minutes later, Kev and Adam came and joined them - bringing them a round of beers, including for Kim, Erin and Antonio who were all on their way.
Kim walked over to the boys and sat on a chair next to Will taking one of the beers that was on the table for her and Erin, Jay looked confused, he looked around and saw that Sylvia, Gaby and Stella had also arrived, but Erin was no where to be seen, "Where's Erin?" He asked.
"Oh yeah," Kim replied, "She asked me to tell you that she wanted to talk to you for a minute outside."
Jay just nodded, knowing that she really only wanted to talk to him to moan about going out and to kiss him, because she doesn't like kissing him in front of people (usually) and apparently that one time when they kissed in Molly's was a 'one time thing'. He smiled as he walked outside and met her down the side of the pub, "Hey, I heard you wanted to see me?" He asked, "How was girls night?"
"Ugh honestly, I hate you for persuading me to get that new TV!" She groaned, "The Notebook and Love Island in one night? Ruined my week to be honest. Apparently it's so much better on our tv though."
Jay smirked and pulled her into his arms, "But you love that tv! You've got to admit, watching the games on it and watching all those films we love is just so much better! Besides, we compromised. We didn't even have to move your band posters! My guy did an excellent job on the new unit, you've got to admit."
"Yeah… he really did, but Love island Jay! Fucking Love Island! I just wanted to spend the night at home, alone with you," She sighed, resting her head on his chest.
"We can go now if you want? Will's here and he's talking to everyone so probably won't follow us…"
She shook her head, "No, I actually think a night out with everyone is what we need. We have tomorrow and Sunday off so we can have a hangover day tomorrow and then have a chill Sunday?"
"That sounds great," He replied, leaning down and kissing her.
She pulled back, wiping the lipstick smudge off his lips, "You taste like tequila - you on the shots already?"
He chuckled, "Will got me them, to say thank you for us letting him stay. I'm sure he will buy us both plenty more tonight, you want to go in?"
She nodded and they went inside, up to the table with all their friends and sat down. Will was currently telling everyone a story about a funny incident in the ER, a story which Erin and Jay had both heard at least three times in the past week. They looked at each other and just rolled their eyes and listened to Will tell the story about the man with a deodorant can stuck up somewhere a deodorant can should not belong.
As the night wore on, Erin could tell that Jay was getting drunk. He had started to giggle - not chuckle - at nearly everything that was said and it was so nice seeing him this way when he wasn't caring about anything and just having a good time. Most people in the bar were definitely drunker than usual. Will had been buying her and Jay's drinks (as well as his own) all night so all three of them were pretty hammered. Seeing as it was Cruz's birthday, Herman had shut the bar at midnight for a good old fashioned lock in. There was currently a PD vs Fire beer pong game going on - it was getting very intense - Adam was in a game with Stella and it wasn't going well… for Adam anyway. Only Jay, Will and Erin were left at the table, as everyone else was intensely watching the beer pong match, "Has Jay ever told you about the first time he got drunk?" Will asked Erin after a lapse in conversation.
Jay's face instantly dropped, "Will. Please. No."
"Will. Please. Yes!" Erin laughed as she saw Jay cringe beside her.
"Okay, so he was about 14, and we were up in Wisconsin with my nana, grandad and mom for the end of summer. I was 16 almost 17 and had been invited to a party by my friends. I had to take this dumbass with me," He rolled his eyes. "Apparently he needed to make some more friends and was lonely."
"Aww, didums," Erin joked and pinched Jay's cheek and he slapped it away before drinking the remainder of his whiskey, not wanting to be a part of this conversation.
"He wasn't allowed to drink… Well, mom said he could have one beer. So he did. And he made a few friends, the night was going okay. Then he had another drink…. and another and another. He kept complaining that he couldn't feel anything so just kept drinking - thinking that he was this super heavy weight and could out drink everyone. It didn't help that a few of the guys then started giving him vodka shots because apparently he made a funny face," Will laughed, taking a sip of his beer. "At around 1am, I found him lying with his head in a dog bed, asleep. I decided to be the responsible big brother and take him home even if it meant I missed my chance with one of the hottest girls I'd ever met," Will narrowed his eyes at Jay.
He rolled his eyes, "Whatever Will, she was well out of your league anyway. Even if I hadn't been asleep in a dog bed you still wouldn't have had a chance with her!"Jay exclaimed and Erin laughed.
"Well we will never know now will we! You ruined my chances," He said jokingly, knowing full well that he didn't have a chance with Samantha, but it was funny to wind Jay up. "Well, as soon as we hit the fresh air he puked everywhere. All down himself. It was disgusting. I had to literally hose him down at my friends and half carry him home."
"Oh god, what did your mom say?" Erin laughed, imagining the scene. She had heard many stories about their mom before and could imagine her reaction to this scene.
"Oh she was furious. Annoyingly, she was more mad at me! Even though I genuinely didn't do anything! Apparently it was my fault for letting him get that way," Will rolled his eyes and Jay just grinned.
"Well, I was her poor little boy who had been corrupted by all your friends," He teased.
"So what happened?" Erin laughed, loving hearing the stories of the two younger Halstead brothers.
"Well, we were both grounded. Like that meant we couldn't leave the garden of the cabin, and could only swim as far as she could see. We weren't allowed to go and see anyone either," Will groaned, "It was so boring!"
"So did your mom ever find out the truth? That it was actually Jay's fault and you genuinely had no idea?" Erin asked.
"No, I don't think she did," Will replied but then looked at Jay's face, "Or did she? Jay, what did mom know?"
Jay smirked, downing the rest of his whiskey, "I may have told her, after I uhm, came home…" He said, and felt the mood of the table dwindle - Erin was the only person who know the full story of what Jay went through that last week of his mom's life, but he was pretty sure Will had read his mom's notes so had a good idea of what happened. But Jay knew that he had to start talking about that time, not in detail to everyone, but still talk about some of the things he and his mom had talked about. If he had any chance of getting himself back to normal, he knew that he needed to talk about it. He laughed, remembering what had been said to him after he confessed and he saw that Erin and Will's expressions had changed from concerned to intrigued, "I told her the truth and she laughed - told me she knew it all along and only grounded us both because she hated Will's friends and thought that Samantha was a terrible influence. She said she knew I was lying when I told her that it was you because…"
"You're a shit liar," Erin and Will both said at the same time, causing the three of them to laugh.
Will groaned, "I always knew it! She always liked you best!"
"Of course she did! I mean, can you blame her - look at me!" Jay grinned and the other two just shook their heads. "Okay, we're all out. I'll go and get a round in."
"I'll have a double," Will said, passing him his glass.
"You'll get what you're given," Jay replied, smacking him on the back of his head before taking the glasses off the table and going to wait at the bar to get served.
"I can't believe how well he's doing," Will said, watching Jay at the bar - joking around with Antonio.
"Yeah, he's definitely doing much better than he was," She replied, smiling at her dork of a boyfriend who looked so care free and happy.
"It's because of you, you know?" He said and she shook her head, about to deny it but Will carried on. "No, it really is. You gave him a reason to get himself out of the hole. Yeah, he's got himself out of the hole in the past - but look where that got him? He just buried himself in his work - joining the police and putting all his effort into helping others and not himself. You know, I think that's the first time he's ever really spoke openly about after he came home - and that time he helped mom. Now I know I don't really know the full extent of what happened but I had a read of her notes, and from what I read, I know those last few days must've been the hardest days of his life. Yeah, he has spoken about her before and we have talked a lot about old memories when we reconnected after me moving back to Chicago, but he's never just randomly told me something about that time. Yeah it was small, just about something they spoke about which was probably nothing compared to other things they talked about - but it has just shown me that he's finally getting passed it all or at least coming to terms with what he went through."
"I'm just glad he's feeling better. He still struggles and I can tell when something's got him, but the amount of times I've woken up and he's been in the living room watching his documentaries is less than it ever has been. He's actually opening up about stuff now, which I know is hard for him," She said, smiling at Jay as he walked back over to their table and placed the drinks on the table.
"Okay so we need a plan for what we are going to do tomorrow. I'm proposing a film day - we all know we are going to be far too hungover to do anything. I think we should do a Harry Potter marathon over the two days seeing as we all have the weekend off. What do you think?" Jay asked.
Will instantly agreed, "Oh hell yeah! We haven't done that in years!"
"Ugh seriously? Didn't we just watch it like last year?" Erin sighed.
Jay and Will both grinned at her, "Aww come on babe! You know you love it."
Ugh she hated it when they both grinned at her, that signature Halstead grin was very hard to say no to them when they looked at her like that - especially Jay, "Fine. Only if you buy me a hangover McDonalds first."
"Deal," Will replied very quickly - he hadn't watched the films in order in one go for years so he was thoroughly looking forward to it.
"I'd think twice before agreeing to that deal man, you should see her hungover McDonalds order," Jay teased and Erin smacked his arm. He chuckled, "I'm only joking. I think that sounds like such a good day or two though."
"Hey Halstead!" Adam yelled across the bar as he walked over to the table and both Will and Jay looked up, "Detective, not Doctor! We need you for beer pong! We might need you too, Linds. Sorry doc, CPD only."
Erin and Jay grabbed their drinks and went to go and support the CPD side of beer pong, and hopefully help win the tournament. As Will had been left alone, he decided to go over and sit with Connor and Ethan.
It was getting close to 04:30 and pretty much the whole bar was hammered at this point and they all started leaving - knowing that they'd drank far too much. Erin was the least drunk out of her, Will and Jay because they had a three hour head start on her. Jay was giggly, Erin was rolling her eyes at everything (no change there) and Will was half asleep on the table - definitely ready to go home. Kevin was telling the three of them a story about something he witnessed during his patrol days - that was what was making Jay giggle. Erin wasn't particularly interested at this point, she'd heard the story before back when she and Kev were paired up for a surveillance a few weeks prior when Jay had been with Dr Charles. She looked around the bar, not many people were here now, some of the fire guys, a couple of the people from med and most of her unit. She had caught sight of Kim who was still talking to a doctor from Northwestern, who knew Cruz from when they were younger. They had hit it off almost instantly, and Kim seemed to be enjoying his company as they'd been talking for a good couple of hours now. Kim caught her eye and nodded towards the bathrooms, not so subtly hinting at her to meet her in there. When Erin meant not so subtly, it meant that she saw the guy she was talking to look at Erin and smile to himself - meaning he knew exactly what Kim had wanted. For a cop she couldn't half be obvious sometimes. Erin excused herself from the table and another one of Kev's story, before meeting Kim in the bathroom, "You very subtly signalled for me?" She laughed as she entered the bathroom, to see Kim stood at the sink, waiting.
"Hey! I was subtle!" Kim argued, but Erin just gave her a look and Kim decided not to argue because she had other problems to think about. "Ok, so I'm going back to his…"
"Grab your coat you've pulled," Erin joked, but then saw the nervous look on Kim's face. "Kim, if you don't want to do it, don't."
"I do! I mean, have you seen him? He's hot as hell! He's well out of my league."
While Erin did think this guy was hot, he wasn't her type at all and nothing like Jay. But she still saw where Kim was coming from, "Kim, he is hot - yes. But so are you, so go out there and have some fun!"
Kim thought about it for a second, "Okay, I'm going to do it. So, have you and the Halstead bros got any plans for the weekend?" she asked, wanting to stall a little longer before going out there.
"Yeah, Harry Potter film marathon," She rolled her eyes, "But, Will is getting me my hangover McDonalds so I've agreed."
"Oh wow, he must really want to watch Harry Potter because I've seen your hangover McDonald's order," Kim teased.
Erin just rolled her eyes, "Okay, stop stalling. Go out there and text me tomorrow when you're home and let me know you're okay."
"Okay I will do. Thanks, Erin… Just don't follow me out straight away so he doesn't know we were talking about him," Kim said. It was a completely illogical request but Erin went along with it anyway. She checked her phone and saw that it was 04:56, shit. They really needed to get out of here. Once she had waited two minutes after Kim, she walked back out to the table. She saw that Adam and Kevin had both disappeared too and Jay was checking his phone while Will was snoozing away with his head on the table. Lightweight Erin thought as she walked back over. "Hey, you ready to go?" She asked wrapping one arm around Jay's waist and leaning into him.
"Yep, I ordered an Uber and it says it's about 2 minutes away so we should go out and wait," He replied. "How much did Kim freak out in there?"
Erin laughed, even when drunk, Jay had his detective head on and had obviously noticed Kim's not so subtle hint to go and talk to Erin. "Not as much as I thought she was going to. She just needed a little push in the right direction - she liked him though. I told her to text me tomorrow, well today, to let me know she's okay."
"You're a good friend," Jay replied as he put his arm around her shoulder after standing up from his stool. "But you're an even better girlfriend."
"I know, now come on. Let's get sleepy home so we can go to bed," She replied, which made him laugh.
Jay shoved Will, waking him up, "What?" He groaned.
"Come on William, we are going now," Jay replied, knowing how much Will hated being called William.
"Oh thank god," Will replied and got up, feeling a bit wobbly. "How come you're not as wobbly as me?"
"Because William, I am better at handling my drinks than you. We go through this every time now come on! The Uber is here," Jay said, after receiving the notification on his phone.
"Stop calling me William!" Will grumbled, making his way to the door - ignoring the laughs coming from Erin and Jay.
They quickly said their goodbyes to the fire boys who were all on their final drink as Otis really wanted to go home as he had drawn the short straw, meaning out of he, Gaby and Herman, he had to stay and lock up. He unlocked the front door for them and locked it again behind them.
Thankfully their Uber made it back to the apartment in good time -especially because there were barely any cars at that time of the morning. They all immediately went to bed, absolutely exhausted especially now as it was closer to 6am.
Erin came out of their bathroom to see that Jay was already in bed, seemingly asleep. She wasn't surprised, he had drank a lot tonight and he had been up since 05:45 the previous day so he could go for a run, so he had pretty much been up 24 hours. She crawled into bed beside him and settled her head on his chest. She was just drifting off when Jay spoke, "I had a really good night tonight," He whispered, wrapping his arms around her.
"Me too, I think we all needed it. Don't tell Will I said this because he's offered to pay for my hangover McDonalds, but I'm kind of looking forward to our Harry Potter marathon," She replied.
"Poor Will's not going to know what's hit his bank account," Jay teased.
"Go to sleep," She grumbled, closing her eyes. She heard Jay giggle (she couldn't even be mad because his drunken giggle was cute as hell).
"Night babe," He whispered, kissing her head.
"Night," She yawned before finally falling asleep.
Jay lay quietly, not wanting to wake her up. He couldn't believe he had talked to Will about proposing to Erin. He was also surprised that Will had been okay with it and was even encouraging him. Well, even if Will hadn't been okay with it, he wouldn't have changed his mind it was just nicer for him that his brother supported him. He liked that he would now be able to talk to someone about it and as much as he loved the guys at work - there was no way he would tell any of them his plans because they'd keep dropping 'subtle' hints and it would definitely drive him crazy. All he needed now was a plan, a plan of how and when he was going to propose to the love of his life.
AN:Hope you all enjoyed this chapter! It's taken a while to write - let me know what you think :)
