"You're me!" Buffy exclaimed.
"Yeah, now let's get you some clothes that fit," Beth said. She accepted a small gray bag from Willow that was a duplicate of the one she carried, and followed Buffy out of the room, helping cover her nearly naked self.
"How much room do you have in that thing?" Red asked, staring at the bag Willow carried.
Willow smiled. "I popped for the expanded bag before we left and even the regular bag, which Xander insisted we should all have our own of, is practically a warehouse."
"Normally a tamer just has the one bag, and it carries all the supplies needed to field an entire harem," Amy offered.
"Of course that makes dealing with inventory a chore," Willow said, "even when your tamer isn't a pack rat."
"Xander got bags for everyone because he thought we should have our own stuff as well as making it easier for Willow to keep track of the team's supplies," Marcie said, fading in on Xander's lap.
"I take it most tamers didn't do that?" Xander guessed, not surprised at all, since he'd sensed her sneaking in.
"Not really," Marcie said. "Most Tamers consider it their Alpha's duty and pay no attention to it."
"We are an unusual harem," Willow said with a smile.
"What is up with the mud and dreads?" Buffy asked, as she and Beth returned, both dressed much like Faith usually was in dark leather clothes.
"I had a vision and it just seemed right," Beth replied. "Plus it made it harder for anyone to recognize me."
"Have you considered the fact that you might not be a Pokegirl?" Buffy asked, not wanting to just blurt it out, but not sure how to subtly bring up the subject as from what Beth had told her, she was pretty sure she was just a slayer.
"Xander told me about being a slayer," Beth assured her.
"Oh, good," Buffy said relieved. "You aren't a Pokegirl, aren't in a harem, and don't need sex to stay sane."
"I am in a harem," Beth argued, not wanting to lose the home she'd found. "Xander, tell her."
"Beth is part of my harem," Xander said firmly.
"B-but she doesn't need to be!" Buffy argued.
"It's not about need, it's about want," Xander said. "As long as she wants to be in my harem, she's in my harem."
"And if she doesn't want to be?" Red challenged.
"Then she can leave," Xander said, "this is not the Pokegirl world they came from, no one can force them to stay and sex is easy to come by. I'm not some monster that is trying to enslave anyone."
Red winced. "I didn't mean it like that."
"You did," Willow disagreed, "and I'll say it again, your distaste for sexual relations is insane."
"Having to have sex once a week is insane!" Red fired back.
"It is what is is," Willow replied, "and the fact that we enjoy it and are the ones making demands removes any justification for considering Xander to be taking advantage of us," Willow said with a glare.
"It's not like you had a choice!" Red yelled.
"Why does she think we didn't have a choice?" Amy asked.
"Become a slave or lose your mind is hardly a choice," Red said with a shudder.
"You have issues," Cordite said, amused.
"How is it different from slavery?" Oz asked calmly.
"We aren't allowed to be abused and can leave at any time," Beth said. "While we… erm Pokegirls are second class citizens they are still citizens."
"I thought you could be sold off or put down," Red said, recalling what Xander has said earlier.
"Not in America," Beth replied.
"A lot of assholes have put some serious effort into getting laws passed to change that, but they've all failed so far," Willow said.
"But you still have to be in a harem?" Buffy asked.
"Technically any group of Pokegirls with a human is considered a harem," Marcie said, "so I guess it can be a bit confusing when we talk about it and don't explain which type of harem we mean."
"Girls can have harems?" Red asked, noting the way she'd said humans and not men.
"Psi-dykes and Dildoqueens would have a bit of a problem if they couldn't," Cordite replied.
"Most of the time when we refer to harems we are referring to troubleshooting teams with an actual harem master, but legally all a Pokegirl needs is to have a human who makes sure they get regular sex and vouches for them," Willow explained. "So, we could leave and join another 'harem', in fact since we are part of a real harem it'd be a serious step down, like going from police officer to mall cop."
"Safer, but dull, you don't get as strong, and the pay sucks," Oz said.
"The taming is crap too from what I hear," Marcie said. "Give me a tamer who has had a hero medal and cares for me and I'll never leave." She snuggled into Xander's arms.
"So, as long as you have someone lined up you're good," Oz said, getting the gist of what they were saying.
"And having been in a real harem a lot of people try and convince us to join their 'harem," Amy said, "so it's not hard to jump ship, except for it being a major step down going from Xander to someone else."
"We like our harem just the way it is," Willow said smugly.
"And now I feel like apologizing for pushing myself in," Human Amy said.
"Amy vouched for you, you're fine," Willow said. "It's not like it's the first time we've let a human girl join us."
"I want to meet Harmony," Cordite told Xander reminded of all the good times with her human friend, "make it happen Nerd Boy."
"Once we get our house in order here I'll arrange it," Xander promised. "Do you want her to come here or meet her at the Bronze?"
"Not even a token protest?" Cordite asked.
"Was I supposed to?" Xander. "If seeing her means a lot to you, it means a lot to me too."
Cordite looked both pleased and annoyed.
"You're supposed to argue with her," Willow explained. "Then the two of you wrestle and she twists your arm until you either agree or try and distract her with sex."
"We need a wrestling ring," Xander decided, with a grin.
"Mud, Jello, or professional?" Willow asked, following his train of thought with little effort.
"Professional," Xander said thoughtfully. "Jello and mud sound fun but also like a lot of work to clean up."
"Professional wrestling ring and indoor gun range," Willow said, taking out a notepad and writing it down.
Cordite sighed in irritation. "Listen unless I get some sex or violence in the next couple of minutes I'm going to die of boredom. Annoying the prude version of Willow is fun and all, but it's already reached its limits."
"Wanna go hunt vampires?" Xander asked hopefully.
"I would love to hunt vampires," Cordite said getting up and yanking Xander to his feet, dumping Marcie on the floor, before tossing him over her shoulder and striding off.
Marcie had nimbly landed on her feet and took his seat. As the door closed behind them she said, "Wow, she has really lightened up. She is not nearly as demanding as she usually is."
"Remember when she broke his hips and insisted on finishing while Willow was healing him?" Amy asked with a grin.
"More like he refused to stop," Willow replied. "I mean sure, Cordite wouldn't have let him, but it didn't even occur to him."
"If they didn't have traits in common they wouldn't be bonded the way they are," Marcie pointed out.
"Damn," Beth said with a pout, "I just realized I'm never going to experience a bond with him like you guys do, this sucks."
"The price of being human," Amy said, giving her a comforting pat on the shoulder.
"I want to introduce you to Mom," Buffy told Beth. "Also, I'm going to need someone there to explain things anyway because she's going to notice the size difference here."
"I… I guess I could meet her," Beth said slowly. She was curious what her local mother looked like and if things turned awkward she'd just return to the harem so there wasn't any real risk like at home.
"I'll go with you," Marcie offered. "I want to look around a bit anyway."
"You kinda stick out," Buffy said.
Marcie grinned as she faded away.
"Oh yeah," Buffy said, "that works."
"Let's call dad and let him know you're okay," Amy told her analogue. "We can use video call to show both of us as proof."
"We don't have video call," Human Amy said.
"Oh yea, primitive tech," Amy said, smacking herself in the head. "Oh well, we'll call anyway and see how it goes."
"I really should," Human Amy agreed reluctantly.
"Relax, you have a place in the harem regardless," Amy encouraged her.
Human Amy laughed. "That makes me feel better, though I still have a hard time believing you guys accepted me just like that."
"Of course we accepted you, you're me and I am awesome!" Amy exclaimed, throwing up her hands and releasing small bursts of fireworks.
The others filled out leaving Willow alone with Red and Oz.
"If you have something embarrassing you want to ask, now's the time to do it," Willow said.
Red's eyes darted to Oz, but she remained silent.
"Can you tell me about the Bond?" Oz asked, knowing his Willow well enough to guess at what she wanted to know.
0o0o0o0o0o
"Swords are a bit old fashioned," Cordite said, "but there is something to be said for removing limbs without getting your clothes dirty."
"You seem to do okay with just a dagger," Xander said, leaning against a tombstone.
"Take off the head fast enough and there's no blood," Cordite replied. "It's not nearly as fun, but it helps when you don't want to make a mess."
"A stake in the heart works about the same," Xander said thoughtfully. "Buffy always complains about her clothes, but it's because she doesn't just kill them, she plays with them."
"Beth is the same way," Cordite said, "it's why you got her all that black leather, it's easier to clean."
"What are some of your favorite hobbies?" Xander asked, wanting to get to know her better and find out what differences there were between Cordite and Cordelia.
"Drinking, fighting, wrestling and shows with toned naked bodies," Cordite said with a smirk.
"Now that-" Xander began.
"See, I told you. The early bird gets the worm," one vamp told another as they stepped out from behind a crypt.
"You shouldn't interrupt your betters," Cordite said with an evil grin, looking forward to committing some grievous bodily harm before dusting them.
"Listen Bitch-" *Poof* The vampire was terminally interrupted by a stake to the heart as Xander and the remaining vampire just stared at the ashes in surprise.
"I did not expect him to dust so easily," Xander admitted as he pulled back his stake.
"I… gotta go," the vampire said before turning and sprinting off.
"Mine," Cordite told Xander, "no kill stealing!"
"Yours," he agreed, waving her forward.
Cordite blurred forward, appearing in front of the vamp and landing a kick that sent him flying back almost to where he'd started from.
"Mercy!" the vampire squealed as Cordite leapt on him.
Xander smiled contently as he watched his girl beat the vampire into the ground.
A few seconds later Cordite dusted off her hands as the vampire ashed. "Opps, accidentally drove his ribs into his heart."
"You're going to have to watch that," Xander said sounding disappointed. "I guess we'll just have to find more vampires for you to train on until you get it right."
Cordite looked embarrassed for a second until she noticed the amusement he was radiating through their bond. "I guess we will," she said with a smirk as she turned and walked off. "Coming?"
Xander had to wipe a trace of drool off his lips as he watched her walk away entranced by the view. "Repeatedly," he said hurrying to catch up.
"So, what hobbies do you have?" she asked, thankful all over again that she'd listened to Willow and taken a chance on regaining their Xander.
"I am a huge nerd," Xander said unrepentfully, "I love comic books, cartoons, and video games. I love watching really bad movies and heckling them."
Cordite's smile grew even larger, this was her Nerd Boy alright! "Oh look, a victim!" she said cheerfully as the two came upon a vampire about to play with his food.
"Isn't that my line?" the vamp asked confused.
"Not tonight," Cordite said before she blurred forward.
Typing by: fyrewolf5