Peace is not the absence of war, but a virtue based on strength of character.
Baruch Spinoza
"You can't be here." Kevin said through clenched teeth, "this is a private investigation." He looked up from Erin's computer and glared at J.J. over his rectangular glasses.
"Don't worry Kevin," J.J. said smoothly, "I'm not here on business." She moved inside the house, pulling the door closed behind her. "Where's Erin?" She asked, facing Rossi. Dave got the feeling that J.J. let herself inside his house more often than he realized.
Dave stepped away from the doorway, letting J.J. into the dining room. "She's resting."
"Can I see her?"
"What's all this?" Dave asked and gestured to the gift bag in J.J's hand.
J.J. Raised an eyebrow. "Girl stuff," she evaded.
"Ooh..now I'm intrigued," Penelope said. She rubbed her hands together in excitement. "What did you bring her?"
"Trust me," J.J. arched her brow without humor, "it's nothing fun."
"Annd," Dave cut in, "we've reached the point in the conversation, where I should go and get Erin."
"Yeah," Kevin looked up from the laptop and said with all the smugness he could muster. "I don't think any of you should be in here while I'm working. I'm supposed to keep things confidential, you see."
Annoyed at Kevin's superiority complex, Dave said, "Ya know, Kevin. You're in charge of the investigation, but this is my house."
"David, be nice to Agent Lynch," Erin said, in her most authoritative tone, coming into the dining room.
"Chief Strauss," Kevin said coldly and nodded in Erin's general direction. "I think you all should leave," he said. The temperature in the room dropped 10 degrees and everyone waited for the backlash.
Dave watched the women in the room, wondering who would be the first to speak. He could see the smoke coming out of Erin's ears and J.J. wasn't far behind.
"You know what-Kevin." Penelope bit out, surprising everyone. "We all understand that you're in charge here but- y-you..." she fumbled her words. She didn't want to make a scene but the words bubbled up anyway. "Kevin, you could be less of a jerkedy, jerk! I completely understand that ''you're in charge', but Agent Rossi and-" she fumbled again, losing her nerve. "Rossi and Chief Strauss are my friends and I need you to be nicer to them!"
"But Plum Sauce, when I agreed that you could come along, you promised you would be professional and not let your feelings for those involved," he sneered as he glanced at first Strauss and then Rossi, "cloud your judgement."
"First of all Kevin Lynch, do not call me Plum Sauce!" Penelope raged stabbing a pink manicured finger at him. "We are not together and you don't have the right to call me that stupid nickname, that I never liked in the first place. Second, the only thing you did was drive!" She roared. "Let's not forget that I am the senior tech assigned to this case. I'm supervising you."
Kevin looked up from the computer screen, red faced and furious.
"Okay, you two." Erin interjected, holding her hands out and coming to stand between Kevin and Penelope. Separating unruly teenagers was her specialty. "David, move Agent Lynch upstairs."
"These are hardly 'close quarters' " Dave argued.
"Yes," Erin nodded, "but if we'' she gestured to herself and the other women in the room, would be a hindrance to the investigation, someone has to go upstairs. He can climb the stairs and I can't." She said, as cool as a cucumber.
" You two," she gestured to J.J. and Penelope, "Come with me."
"I should be supervising Kevin-" Penelope hesitated.
"You can spare five minutes to calm down," Erin said, in a tone that dared anyone to challenge her.
"Yes Ma'am." Dave said, watching the three women move towards the living room. He turned to Kevin. "You heard your Section Chief. I'll show you to my office" Rossi said to Lynch, verbally reminding him that Erin was still his boss and therefore due respect.
"Oh-uh...I'm going to need all the devices in the house." Kevin said.
"That can be arranged," Dave said, "now move it."
"Okay," Erin sat down on the sofa, and faced Penelope. "I'm not your Section Chief right now, so I think we can all be honest with each other."
"Yes Ma'am." Penelope chewed her bottom lip, making cracks in her bright pink lip gloss.
"What the hell did you see in that guy?" Erin asked, annoyed at him and his display of superiority.
"Oh uh.." Penelope fumbled, caught off guard by the question. "That's a little bit personal."
J.J. turned to Erin, "Good luck. I've asked her once or twice and never got a straight answer."
"He was nice to me," Penelope admitted, "we liked the same stuff," she smiled and said, "He didn't judge me. He's really not a bad person."
"He's not," J.J. agreed, "but that ego-"
"That's a no-go." Erin said, "right now he's on a power trip."
J.J. nodded in agreement.
"Oh! I know," Penelope nodded fervently, her glasses slipped slightly off her nose. "We're not together and I'm keeping it that way."
"Good for you, Ms. Garcia. You deserve better. David wouldn't dream of being so condescending to me." Strauss said, with a look on her face like she wanted to go upstairs and give Lynch a piece of her mind for causing such a scene in her house. "He knows I'd kill him."
JJ spoke up, "Let's not waste anymore breath on Lynch." She said as she reached down for the gift bag.
Suddenly, Erin's phone rang. She glanced at the screen. "Hang on, ladies. I have to take this." She got up from the couch and brushed J.J.'s shoulder with her fingertips.
"David!" she called, as she reached the bottom of the stairs.
She answered the call and held it to her ear. "David, come here!"
"What is it?" He hurried down the staircase, "What's wrong?"
Her hands shook and blood rushed to her ears, "It's the test results."
Dave stepped off the last step. On habit, he grabbed her hand as she put the call on speaker. Anxiety flooded his chest. Had they made the right choice in getting the genetic test?
"This is Erin Strauss. David's here too."
"Erin," Mary said, a bit too cheerful for Dave's liking, "I have your blood work back."
"How's it look?" Dave cut in, his knees shaking, he grabbed the banister for balance.
"Everything checks out."
"Everything's alright?" Erin asked, suddenly numb, her hand cold in his.
"It's great, keep doing what you're doing." Mary affirmed.
Erin's phone hit the floor and Dave launched himself into her arms. "We're okay," he said against her neck, holding her as close as he could.
Tears of relief fell off her cheeks and into the collar of his shirt. Finally! In that moment, everything was just as it should be.
"Hang on-" Dave pulled back slightly and picked up Erin's phone. "Thank you for calling," he said quickly and disconnected the call.
"Is everything okay?" J.J. asked, cautiously, having heard the phone clamoring to the floor from where she was in the dining room.
"Better than okay," Dave said, keeping Erin in his arms. "We had some tests done-"
"Good news, I hope."
"Fantastic!" Erin said, wiping her tears with the edge of her sleeve. "We're okay," she said, with her hands against her bump.
J.J. smiled.
"That is fantastic!" Penelope said, "group hug!" She wrapped Dave and Erin in a hug.
"J.J. come here," Erin said, trying to catch her breath. She pulled J.J. into the hug.
"I hate to interrupt," Kevin cut in. Standing on the staircase, "I need your cell phones."
"Geeze, Kevin!" Penelope huffed, "We were having a moment!"
"Don't worry, Penelope." Dave said, handing Erin's phone to Kevin. "There are plenty more where that came from." Rossi reached into his pocket and grabbed his phone before unlocking it and handing it to Kevin, who appeared to be enjoying this too much. Dave glared at the insensitive man. "Is there anything else you need?" He asked pointedly. He wanted Kevin to hurry up and get out of his house. For once, Kevin proved to be smarter than he looked and scurried back up the stairs to finish his task.
"Ladies, why don't we adjourn to the family room, Dave suggested. He was just about to follow them when Erin grabbed his hand. He put his arm around her and pulled her into a kiss. "I love you," she said, pulling back.
"I love you." He repeated, "more every day."
She took his hand and laid it against her bump, "Feel that?"
"Yeah," he nodded with a lump in his throat. "I can't believe we made that." He pulled her back into his arms. "I'm going to listen to Hotch and call that lawyer," he said against her hair.
The doorbell rang again. "That bell is really annoying," he groaned and let her go.
"Maybe we should put a sign on the door, 'BAU agents, welcome'"
"I like it," he grinned and turned on his heel and went to get the door.
"What are you guys doing here?" Dave asked and stepped on the front porch.
"If you've got that dog chained up, we're here to help you," Derek said.
"Hotch said we couldn't work the case."
"Yeah." Derek hedged, "He's not gonna be happy with me."
"We made an executive decision." Reid said quickly. "Can we come in?"
"Guys," Dave said scratching the back of his neck. "I turned in my badge, but you guys...you still need your jobs."
Derek shrugged, "I've put it on the line for this team before."
"Yeah," Reid shrugged, "I have a PHD and an eidetic memory, the FBI needs more than I need them."
"When you put it that way… Come on in guys and thanks. I have to warn you Kevin is upstairs going through our computers and he's drunk with his perceived power. But that is neither here nor there. I'll show you where the ladies are". Dave led Morgan and Reid through the house. His warning about Kevin being there meant that they didn't even try to discuss more about why they were there until they were assured of some privacy.
"Ladies, guess who's come to dinner."
"What are you guys doing here?" J.J. asked, as Dave led Derek and Spencer to the living room.
"Here to help," Spencer said.
"Nope," Dave said, glancing towards the staircase. "You're here to eat."
"I can order pizza." Derek offered.
"We're celebrating," Dave said, "And pizza won't cut it."
"What are we celebrating?" Derek asked.
"What did we miss?" Reid piped in.
"We'll fill you in later, after Lynch is done upstairs. It doesn't feel right sharing this, while someone is in our house, invading our privacy." Erin said, suddenly on edge.
"Penelope!" Kevin called from the top of the stairs.
"Yes?" She met him at the bottom of the stairs.
"Can you help me?"
"Whatcha need?" She asked, with a sly grin.
His cheeks reddened up to his ears. "Whomever programmed these computers, is a better hacker than I could ever be." He admitted.
"I'm going to take that as an apology." She said and started up the stairs.
"How long were you going to let me struggle?"
She shrugged, "You're the 'agent in charge'."
"And a jerk," he admitted.
"That too." She agreed and followed him into Rossi's office.
Once Garcia, sat down and got to work, the process went smoothly and quickly. She grinned, victoriously because Rossi and Strauss had listened to her when she advised them to let her install the program she wrote to prevent their personal computers from being hacked into. She wanted to protect them from their information being stolen and sold on the Dark Web, but this worked even better as it showed a certain Technical Analyst that when it came to hacking, he might be good but compared to her, he didn't know his butt from a hole in the ground.
Erin turned to Dave, "What are we doing?"
"Waiting for Kevin to leave," J.J. said before Dave could respond.
"Well," Erin got up from the couch and headed for the kitchen. "I need some cereal."
"Ook" Dave said, confused.
J.J. grinned and went to follow Erin, "Pregnancy cravings suck."
Dave stayed on the sofa, he kicked his feet up on the footstool. Times they were a-changing in the Rossi household.
"What's going on?" Derek asked.
"we're stalling." Dave said and reached for the decanter of scotch in the side table. "Who wants scotch?"
"I'll take some," Reid said.
Erin grabbed a bowl from the cabinet, "Want some corn flakes?" She asked, turning to J.J.
"Are you doing okay?" J.J. asked and started the coffee pot.
"Fine," Erin said, opening another cabinet. She rummaged around looking for the corn flakes, but came up short.
"Yeah." J.J. said, "I don't think I believe that.
"I'm not okay." Erin slammed the cabinet closed. "I'm out of corn flakes."
"Come on," J.J. grabbed her keys. "I'll drive. You need a minute."
"I feel like I'm under a microscope," Erin said, sweat beaded down the back of her neck.
"We both know Kevin's on a power trip, but we all know you're innocent."
Erin shook her head, anxiety crept into her chest. "You're right. I do need a minute."
"Let's go. Rossi, I'm kidnapping your woman!" J.J. yelled.
Erin grabbed her coat off the coat tree and headed for the door.
The men on the couch perked up, "where are you guys going?" Derek asked.
Dave waved Derek off, indicating that he should mind his own business.
"Sorry," J.J. smirked, "girls only."
"What about Penelope?" Derek cut in.
"She's on the clock." Reid cut in, "I think we're in enough trouble, without Garcia leaving Lynch alone."
"Thank you, Doctor Reid." Erin said, relieved that she didn't have to explain herself.
"Have fun, you two." Dave waved them out the door.
"Seriously?" Derek said, raising an eyebrow.
"What?" Dave asked.
"Strauss has a disco-ball on her hand and you're not going to make her kiss you goodbye?"
"First of all," Dave glared at Derek. "I don't make Erin do anything." He said, getting off the couch. He snatched Erin's purse off the kitchen island and raced outside.
Spencer glared at Derek, "I think that's why you're still single."
"Shut up, Pretty Boy," Derek shot back, watching Dave pull the front door open.
"Hey!" Dave called, stepping into the yard. He held up the purse and waited for someone to notice him.
"Do you need something?" J.J. asked and climbed into the driver's seat.
Dave reached into his pocket and pulled out his wallet and moved towards J.J.'s car.
"What's wrong?" Erin asked, stepping out of the car.
"You didn't take your purse," he slid the shoulder strap onto her arm.
"I don't know where we're going, but I need a break from Lynch." Erin said.
"Okay," Dave said, "I'll call J.J.'s phone when Lynch leaves."
"Thanks," J.J. said, "Erin, if you want to kiss him goodbye, I promise not to look."
But it was too late, Dave and Erin were lost in their own corner of the world.
"Why did you do that?" Erin asked, slightly breathless.
"I'd rather beg forgiveness than ask permission." He held open her car door and watched her climb in. "Now, get out of here. Go have some fun." He pulled his credit card out of his wallet. "Spend some money, too."
"We talked about this, David Rossi." Erin said, through clenched teeth. "I am not with you for you to be my personal ATM. The agency already thinks I got knocked up to trap you. I can pay my own way." She paused at the thought of possibly not being able to afford to pay her own way soon, if the agency fired her. Then again she thought, she wouldn't need a lot of money in prison. If they decided there was enough evidence to prosecute her. She wouldn't be able to go on a shopping spree from her cell block.
"You're right, we did talk about this and I thought we'd finally settled it. What's mine is yours, Erin. We're in this together for the long haul. I already added you to the accounts I'm waiting for your cards to come in."
"Are you sure?"
"Of course I'm sure. You and I are a team, us and our kids, all five of them. When you need something, buy it. I don't care what the Bureau thinks. Jesus Erin." Dave raked his hand through his hair. "J.J. Take her shopping and don't leave until she runs my credit card."
"Will do," J.J. said and pulled out of the driveway.
In silence, J.J, navigated the car through the neighborhood and onto the highway. "So," J.J. asked, breaking the silence. "Where are we going?"
"We could take a tour of Club Fed, so I can get fitted for my jumpsuit," Ern said dryly.
J.J. shook her head. "The only thing you're getting fitted for is a wedding dress." She said, trying to offer comfort. "I think Rossi's right. A little bit of retail therapy never hurt anyone."
"Tell that to all the people who file bankruptcy, when they lose their jobs and can't pay their credit card bills." Strauss threw back at her.
"Really Erin, that's your response?" JJ gave her the side eye. She would have preferred to give her a scorching look to let her know she was not amused, at her comment but didn't want to risk an accident. With the luck the BAU had been having lately; One car accident was enough. Dave would kill her if he found out they crashed because she took her eyes off the road with his pregnant partner in the car.
"I'm sorry." Erin apologized, not wanting to risk her tentative friendship. "That was mean."
"Dave's not going to let anything happen to you." J.J. said, "I've never seen him this happy."
"We are happy," Erin said quietly. "I keep thinking that the bottom is going to fall out."
"What else is going on?" J.J. asked, her profiler instincts were in full force.
"I don't like having Lynch in my house. I don't like how he talks to women and I hate that I couldn't tell him off the way he deserved. I had to chew through my tongue to stop myself."
"Oh I have absolutely no doubt about that, Erin. I remember when Hastings stepped out of line when interviewing our informant that day and you read him the riot act. He hid from you for weeks."
Strauss chuckled at one of the few happy memories the two women had from that time. "I'll take that as a compliment." She said, laughing with the other blonde.
"You know what, Jen, I think you are right, a little shopping is just what the doctor ordered."
J.J raised an eyebrow. "Since when did Rossi get a medical degree?"
"Oh he is not a real doctor, but he likes to play one." JJ, hurriedly cut off the rest of her sentence.
"TMI. Erin Strauss, you have definitely been hanging around Dave too long."
"Ha!"
Meanwhile, back at the mansion.
"Do you really have to go through their text messages?" Penelope asked, staring at Kevin from across Rossi's desk. "The whole thing feels icky."
"It's not like I want to," Kevin swiped his hand across his forehead. "Crap!"
Kevin stood up abruptly, snatched some paperwork off the printer tray and raced down the stairs.