So tonight has been one of the craziest things I've had to deal with in my life and if you knew anything about my childhood that would definitely be saying something. It is currently 4:30 in the morning, I fell asleep on Lily before she even got off of work, and was enjoying getting more than three hours of uninterrupted sleep when my highschool friend (Who I had not talked to in months) showed up in the dead of night.

Apparently her going out with my (may I emphasize lame as hell and not fun in the slightest) parents constituted as her whoring off and her ex told her that she didn't deserve to be a mother and should have aborted their daughter before she was born because of it. To top it off he was going to kill himself if she didn't take him back, oh and he had their daughter at the time.

Yeah.

So that's been my past few hours, I now have an infuriated woman sleeping in my room with her kid, I'm sleeping on the fucking couch, and I'm trying to find good reasons why not to introduce her ex to my Louisville slugger.

This weekend, rocks.

So you know what? Fuck it, not a complete chapter at all but I need some positive feedback because my entire faith in mankind was kinda turned on its ear tonight by one man and I just need to do something for myself.

Seriously people, I don't give a shit what you do with your personal lives, but don't draw your kids into it, fucking hell.

Lady Dancia Alya Malfoy's List of Acceptable Friends and Acquaintances For One Lord Harry James Potter

1.) Lady Dancia Alya Malfoy-Naturally

2.) Lady Susan Anna Bones-Ancient Dark Gray Familial Ally, Eventually Becomes Smoking Hot and a Rather Skilled Necromancer.

Note:First Witch in Our Year to Hit Puberty, it Did Not Go Well For Her First Time Around So Make Sure to Get Older Witches to Look Out For Her. Possibly Buy Her a Can of Bear Mace, Wizards Never Expect Getting Maced and it is Kind of Funny to Watch.

3.) Hermione Jean Granger-Starts Out Annoying As Hell, Unyielding Loyalty, Eventually Quite Cute, Terrifying Beyond Words When on a Personal Crusade or Protecting Harry. Amazing Poker Face and She Knows it.

Note:Must Take Under My Wing Early On Before Childhood Know It All Attitude Forces Me To Kill Her Out of Shear Aggravation. Also Mind That Andromeda Liked the Woman, That Should Say Enough on the Potential of Being Terrifying.

4.) Lord Neville Franklin Longbottom-Ancient Light Gray Familial Ally, Harry's God-brother, Eventual Badass.

Note:Thank Circe He is a Self Confident Boy This Time Around, Waiting Till Sixth Year For Him to Become Useful Would Have Been Beyond Tedious. Get Him to Talk to That Rudding Hat As Soon As Possible So He Can Get His Sword. Neville is Hilariously Destructive With That Bloody Thing and I could Use the Laughs.

5.) Weasleys Besides Percival and Ronald-Light Aligned, Poor, Hotheaded, No Sense of Fashion, Deathly Loyal, Focus on the Curse Breaker and Twins, Possibly Ginerva When She Grows Out of Her Infatuation For Harry.

6.) Lord Theodore Tiberius Nott-Ancient Dark Familial Ally, Hates Riddle, Loves Books, Wicked Sense of Humor, Closet Doctor Who Fan. Always Thought Hermione Was Attractive, Perhaps Set Them Up This Time Around? Couldn't be Any Worse Than Ronald.

Note:Weakness For Crystallized Pineapple, May Not Be Useful Now But One Never Knows When They Must Casually Bribe an Ally.

7.) Blaise Zabani-Connections to the Italian Ministry, Smooth Talker, Hates Riddle, Assassin in Training, Entirely Far Too Charismatic For His Own Good, Womanizer to the Extreme and Rather Proud of it.

Note:His Mother is Terrifying Make This Clear to Harry, Man Whore.

8.) Lady Daphne Greengrass-Ancient Pure Neutral Ally, Hates Riddle, Eventually Criminally Smoking Hot For an Ice Queen, Becomes A Solicitor, Not to be Trifled With.

Note:Remember That She is a Closet Lesbian and is Most Likely to Run Off With Tracey Davis After Graduation Leaving Whoever is Betrothed to Her to Marry Astoria, Again. Ugh.

9.) Luna Selena Lovegood-Can't Help it, She is Hilarious Especially When Left to Her Own Devices, Loyal Beyond Words to Harry, Entertaining Drunk, Eventually Very Cute in that Waif Like Manner.

Note:When She Wants Pudding, Get Her Pudding. Also Let Her Know Crumple Horned Snorkaks Only Migrate Through Sweden in the Spring, Her Reaction Ought to be Adorable.

"DANY!" An excited voice yelled out from down the hall snapping Dancia from her idle list making, a habit she had taken up as of late preparing for her eventual debut at Hogwarts. Seriously she needed to prioritize things to make the first few years at the very least go smoothly, but there was always hiccups to plot around.

Like for instance, Quirrell, he was a liability and she should just eliminate him early on, but his actions on Halloween turned Hermione from an insufferable know it all to Harry's most loyal and frankly useful friend. A few years of being continuously let down and outright betrayed by authority figures would iron out the rest of her annoying personality quirks.

So what to do? Leave the possessed shell of a man to moulder for a couple months until he nearly gets a twelve year old girl killed by a troll to be saved by Harry? Or would just training Hermione as early as her Diagon Alley trip in wizarding etiquette, customs, and politics be enough?

That opened its own can of worms because that would make her more loyal to Dancia rather than Harry and that wouldn't help at all. Dany could keep herself out of trouble and had a century old wizard's experiences to call on.

Harry was Harry, he was a trouble magnet that needed all the help he could get.

Speaking of which...

"Hello Harry, you seem pretty excited what is the occasion?"

Her best friend entered her room and stopped before her holding what looked like a wad of hastily shredded parchment, "They're here! Our Hogwarts letters!"

Oh, well bollocks was it that time already?

"Oh interesting, mine must still be... oh, speak of the Devil and he shall appear." A moment later a barn owl landed on her desk, offered a letter, and as soon as she removed it from its claw the owl snapped at her and took off.

She really hated school owls, Dany needed to make sure Harry got Hedwig again, he loved that stupid owl despite her prickly personality so it would make a good birthday present regardless.

Dancia barely glanced at the envelope before tearing it open, reading the acceptance letter she let out a sigh than smiled at the practically vibrating boy before her while gently waving the parchment in her hand.

"Shall we tell mum and the aunts?"

"Oh they know already but they all have headed back home to congratulate Dora, we should get going too!"

Dany tilted her head to the side curiously before replying, "What would they need to congratulate your sister for?"

Harry's grin only grew wider as he excitedly chirped out, "She was made Head Girl!"

The Malfoy heiress just stared at her friend blankly for a few moments before whispering, "Sweet Merciless Morrigan..."

"I know right? She was so shocked when the badge fell out of her envelope she actually fainted."

"I'm feeling a bit faint as well," Dany muttered as she pinched her nose while shaking her head.

The world had truly gone mad, Nymphadora Tonks now held the highest position of authority a student could hold in Dancia's first year at the madhouse known as Hogwarts.

"Come on lets go congratulate her and find out when we can get our supplies!" Having barely enough time to close her enchanted journal, journal not diary no matter how Neville teased her otherwise, she allowed Harry to drag her towards the floo.

Well, if nothing else, this year was going to be memorable.

Like I said a blurb but so just...beside myself that I'm shocked I got this out.

I'm done, I need to try and get some sleep, this is just... *Sigh*, there is a reason I'm a misanthropic introvert, and tonight proved once again that I was right not to put too much faith in other people.

Ugh.