I couldn't sleep, wrote this and it really doesn't fit into the overall story but I thought it'd just be a fun little thing to stick in between last chapter and the end of the school year. I kind of get a kick out of Dany and Harry being completely oblivious to what is glaringly obvious to everyone else, and this just made me laugh, so please enjoy this little slice of life snippet.

Dancia stared out of her dorm window while rubbing her fingers against her temples slowly, attempting, and failing, to relieve the tension she felt at the moment.

After destroying Riddle's first Horcrux and returning to school she had fallen back into her regular routine and simply did her best to get through her first year without further incidents distracting herself and her friends. Oddly enough this desire was less for her benefit and more for Dora, the woman had enough stress in her life and the more time she could focus on studying for her NEWT's the better.

That was all easier said than done though because, for reasons she yet could not begin to comprehend, she had discovered that several older girls were talking about dosing Harry with love potions.

He was eleven.

What. The. Fuck.

The worst part was, they had likely done so during Draco's time as well it just didn't do anything to him since his balls hadn't fucking dropped yet, it would also explain Harry's developmental issues in his later teens, aside from being a resident of Durzkaban that is. Regardless, if you were getting potioned with something that deeply affects your mental balance before you even start having thoughts along those lines then Circe only knows what it would do to you long term.

So Dany had done exactly what any caring friend would do when she finds out some skanky sluts were after her best friend without his knowledge.

She...took care of them, at least she thought she had.

Dany had thought the humiliation of having 'WHORE' spelled out across their foreheads in painful boils would have been enough to dissuade them but apparently it wasn't, because not a week after the swelling went down they made their strike.

Not that it worked, Dany had been spiking Harry's drinks with a potion neutralizer since their first day back, constant vigilance and all that. If you aren't properly paranoid and crazy prepared you only have yourself to blame when shit happens and you're caught flat footed.

Which it would, since her best friends were Harry Potter and Hermione Granger.

Glaring across the Great Hall at the skanky sluts in question Dany came to a simple conclusion, she'd have to outsource this one to a person with limited scruples and lax morals.

She needed Aunti Bella.

Narcissa Malfoy was going through the family bank statements, quite content with the returns she was gaining from the investments she had made earlier in the year, when her thoughts were interupted by her older sister's hysterical laughter.

This...was not something new, Bellatrix would break out laughing at a new discovery or the like at random, but the tone was different. She sounded outright manic, as if she could barely contain her mirth so had given up all attempts to do so.

That...could not be good.

Sighing she closed her ledger and made her way down to the rooms Bellatrix had squatted in for the last ten years and popped her head through the open doorway.

Bella was in a bathrobe and slippers, nothing new there, with her hair up in a bun and a pair of reading glasses perched on her nose. She was holding a letter in her hand while the other was holding her stomach, her laughter actually looking like it was going to choke her.

Seeing Narcissa she waved her into the room and handed her the letter, breaking out into further laughter as her now bemused sister read it.

Dearest Aunti Bella,

I find myself in a bit of a quandry, you see I have discovered a plot being persued by several unscrupulous witches to ensnare my Harry with love potions. While I am quite aware that there is no real threat to his person as of yet, due to the simple fact that without the proper hormones existing to be affected in any noticable manner there is very little for the potions to work with, but I simply cannot let this transgression pass without response.

So I was curious if you had any suggestions on how to handle these skanky sluts and keep them away from Harry until he is capable of understanding what these dirty whores are trying to do to him?

I will of course defer to your established experience in metting out vengence, for I admit a rather grim desire to make them understand that going after my friends in such a manner is...

Unacceptable.

Hugs and Kissses

Dancia

Narcissa was vibrating with suppressed laughter before she finally broke out cackling and leaned into her still laughing sisters shoulder, the pair barely able to stand at the moment.

Lucius stepped in the room at this point, raised a perfectly plucked brow, and silently accepted the letter from his now giggling wife. After reading it he ran a palm across his face while letting out a withering sigh, then a moment later snorted lightly in amusement.

"That boy is doomed and he doesn't even know it yet...does she even know it yet?"

All he got was more laughter from the two Black witches, sighing he left the letter on the table and walked back to his office, wondering if he should even bother bringing up a betrothal agreement at this point.

Just Dany being adorably oblivious in her actions, I thought it was cute at least, anyway I'm gonna try and sleep and hope that it takes this time, nighters all!