Change

The way North is within sights as we've left the village for some days now, but I haven't been able to cope with the pain Sesshomaru inflicted on my body since having sex with him. I was barely conscious, and lust had taken over all rational thought in my head. Though I want to blame lust as a keen factor, it was actually due to the priestess taunting me in my dream that night. I shut my eyes and can recall it so vividly.

[Why do you hesitate, child?]

"Because I know when I'm not something desired! Leave me alone for once!"

[I can't do that, not when I've come this far with you.] The priestess wrapped her cold hands around my neck and held me in place as her features shifted between human and vulpine. [You'll give in! Give the dog demon what he desires and make the bond!]

"Again with—with this bond!" I shoved her away and watched her body float as I heard her hiss with discontent. "All that's been said to me by you is about this damn foxfire! That's all what its about! He wants nothing from me personally but the blessing to give him power!"

[The only way to truly bless the fang of a dog demon is to create a bond. You are a foolish girl and stubborn as an Ox! The young lord can give you pleasure unfound by mortal men, how is that not tempting?] She was speaking frank and I felt my face flare with heat thinking about the subtle touches he's given me. [See…you desire it too…] she cooed.

"It doesn't matter what I want…he's made it pretty clear that's not his intention…" reluctant to say it but knowing it was the truth, the priestess groaned angrily.

[I, the kitsune of Motobu Temple, have personally claimed the great dog demon Toga of the West myself and take pride in the affair!] She was resolute when speaking and her form returned to how it was when we first met. [My power is intoxicating to any powerful demon and only I choose who my power goes to.] Making that point clear, her nail touched my cheek and I dared not move. [The flames you spout out are due to your infuriating emotions you barely control. But as you've noticed—as well as the young lord—you two are compatible.] Her words became a velvety concoction that slithered into my head like a strong drink.
She slightly purred as she swiveled around me while whispering more into my ear.
[He wants you…pride being in the way, you can break it down and have your way with him.]

"That's not me…" knowing myself well enough I could never make the first move, she made something appear in front of me and I stared at my own reflection. "What?"
Seeing myself after so long and only now noticing the changes, it was shocking. Knowing my hair had changed color a little, I didn't realize it had actually changed fully to being orange and white without a trace of my own roots. My skin clear and smooth as a babies while my eyes were deeper in color but stayed the same shade of green.

[What man wouldn't want you?] She asked me. Her hands showing the me in the reflection as she pulled another mirror to what I did look like before, it was suffocating seeing me as a human to the me now as a demon. Am I really accepting it? I'm really not human any longer?
[Day by day you slowly morph to the role of kitsune. The mortal self you were once before is no more! Take what you want] her hand gripped my chin to face her. [A man desires you…who cares that its for power…] those words easily dripping from her painted red lips like a subtle poison was seeping into me easily. [I see a woman capable of taking what she wants…having fun…displaying all she can…] honeyed words so easily taken in, I felt my body flare up in heat as something warm was pressed on my lips. The priestess grinned knowingly as the dream dissipated and I woke to Sesshomaru kissing me!

I still can't believe it even happened, but the way we passionately went for one another was no joke. Thinking about it makes my cheeks burn and everywhere on my body tingle with delight just from the images. Never thought I would experience such a passion, but didn't know it would hurt so bad.

"Clara," Sesshomaru's voice broke my thoughts and I quickly faced him. "There is a waterfall at the base of this mountain, we will stop there for the evening." Unchanging in his demeanor, he hasn't spoken of what we did nor has he tried touching me.

"Alright, sounds good." Trying to act like him and not make it a big deal was stifling. But even if I did want to have him do it again, I don't think now would be a good time for how sore I was.
I mean really, how does one just go to town on a girls first time and basically break her where you can't even walk!

"…can you walk?" Hearing him and my body flinching thinking he read my thoughts, he was staring blankly at me for an answer.

"I…can…" trying to play it cool, he didn't seem fine with my answer and continued walking without riding the Kirin with me. A singular thought came to mind with how he's acted though. [Was it…was it bad?] The thought came out of the blue but not without reason. He hasn't been on the Kirin since leaving the village and continues to walk. Not once has he touched me and we've barely spoken a few words. [Oh my god he must be disgusted! Was it me? Did I smell bad? I can't read him because his features are too hard to read!] My head throbbing from the different scenarios that could have triggered the distance he's placed, but nothing came to mind since everything I recalled made me blush.

So distracted with ways that the sex was terrible or flawed, he cleared his throat and we were already at the falls?

"Um…Sesshomaru, I have a question—" he released the reins to the Kirin and headed to the water without even turning my way and I felt devastated. [Ok…I can take a hint when I see one.]

Slowly I dismounted the Kirin and shuffled my way over to the falls to bathe. Still nervous being stark naked out in the clear open without walls, I rallied my courage and stripped bare then entered the water only to find the shocking cold temperature painful. Blue flames erupted all around me and the water heated almost immediately to the point the pain subsided and I knew better. Broken uterus wall and cold water was not a match-up, the temperature shocked my system.

"Ok…have to remember that…" wincing as I dipped in I heard a branch snap and whipped my head around to see Sesshomaru? "Uh Se—" he was gone just as I noticed him and I was left speechless. "Was he worried because of the flames?" I didn't think it possible as he left so quickly, but when looking at the waters reflection I could only see the fox priestess stare back at me and little of what I was. "...maybe I'm better off being a demon...emotions seem to not be a factor." The tears fell quietly, but it stung thinking that I was thinking of being human and turning into a full demon.

[Then let's become one...] hearing the priestess outside my head and watching the water swirl to her shape in the reflection, her hands rose above and reached for me as I froze in place. [Forget your mortality...let us become something greater.] Sweet and tantalizing as she caressed my face, her palms warm though I knew she was merely a phantom in my mind, I felt so open. [Come...]

The water was warm as I slowly dipped further in and was being hugged by the priestess. Her figure was merely half of what it was before, yet it felt so full to me as I wrapped my arms around her waist and accepted the fact I was not needed as Clara. Clara the human was passive and weak. Here, there is only room for power and control, a form which is only cared about.

[Yes child...succumb to me now...ease your mind...there is much to do.]