This has to be the most embarrassing moment of my life, the thought going around Kellie's head at that second. Tony and pepper were still having their heavy make-out session until Phil coughed; he also looked embarrassed.
I zoned out until Tony remarked on the security, which I had to snort at. Tony turned to me and looked me up and down at pepper's displeasure.
'And who are you? He asked a bit more flirty than I thought appropriate as he was eight years older. 'Not your girlfriend, and like what eight years you're junior' I saw pepper shoot me a thankful look.
'I am Kellie potter's black belt and your teammate, not that I had a choice in this though' I shot Phil a dirty look which, to mine and Tony's amusement, made him go white and look slightly sorry.
I zoned out until Phil shook me out of my thoughts of duelling my friends when I got back by shaking my shoulder 'come on. Hopefully, Tony will show up at base sometime soon; in the meantime, we should get to the jet before it leaves.
The car ride was one word, boring. The only entertaining thing was Phil's face when I started singing secrets when the silence became too much for me to bear.
We got to the jet rather quickly, considering New York's traffic which I heard was legendary for being very slow.
At the jet, an agent took my bag off me and said it would be given back to me when it had been checked out. I turned to the man.
'If I find out one of you lot has so much as touched my undergarments, so gods help you, I will shove your gun so far up your arse you will be seeing bullets for weeks', I all but snarled.
The man's face was so funny that I almost burst out laughing it was only the look on the blonde's face which I realised only seconds later was captain America himself, that stopped me. Still, when the guy I practically threatened went, I laughed.
Captain Blondie looked at me, concerned 'are you alright, ma'am' he seemed so concerned that I had to stop laughing. 'I am fine, thank you. His face was hilarious.
I was about to reply when a mousy brown-haired man who was a bit taller than me came over.
Captain Blondie recognised him if his face was anything to go by. 'Dr Banner, I have heard a lot about you' Dr Banner looked a bit nervous.
'Bruce banner is amazing at science and has breathtaking anger management issues and is one of my heroes', I commented when I saw his face lose his smile when Captain Blondie greeted him.
I turned to him with a smile and extended my hand for him to shake 'pleasure to meet you. I am Kellie and your teammate for the foreseeable future, not that Nicky gave me much choice.
Bruce gave me a look 'you too then' I nodded fake sadly 'yes, but I will make his life hell you don't piss off a prankster' Bruce had a look of horror 'y y you're a prankster' I nodded a smirk making its way across my mouth.
'I pity him, I do', Bruce murmured, but the big grin made me think he couldn't wait till had my revenge Captain Blondie looked very lost at are exchange, but just as he was about to ask what the hell was going on, Natasha walked up to us 'Id come it's going to get a little hard to breathe in a few minuets'
Bored is one good word that would describe Kellie potter; at that moment, she was told to leave her stuff in her room and look around for a bit until the rest of the team joined.
But as there was nothing to do, she began plotting, and when she began planning, she started to cackle, and when she cackled, Bruce ran from the room in fear.
That led her to sneak around and put traps everywhere, not to harm people but to make them look ridiculous.
As it were, she had charmed Nicky's door so that when he walked in, he would look like Might Guy and feel rather bored; she persuaded agent hill's door to make her look like Tsunade.
She had put the same charm on other random with different Naruto characters' doors, just in case.
Luckily, Captain Blondie walked through the door that made him wear Minato's outfit. It suited him so well that she would bow and address him as Hokage-same every time she saw him.
It confused him and everyone else...except for Bruce. It seemed he had watched or at least read Naruto once.
Getting bored with naruto, she charmed Nicky so that every time he spoke, words like "I am a midget Cyclops" or "Don't hate me because I am beautiful..." would appear above him. The best part was he couldn't see it!
Bruce got a real kick; even Mr.-I-don't-have-humour (captain Blondie) laughed.
The final thing she did (which ended up with her in her room) was her going around yelling, "ART IS A BANG UN" she had never seen anyone go the colour Nicky did
"MISS POTTER, YOU WILL STOP THIS AT ONCE AND GO TO YOUR ASSIGNED ROOM UNTIL I TELL YOU TO COME OUT".
She had done what he said, a bit miffed that he was treating her like some 5-year-old, but the look on his face was priceless.
Shaken out of her plot... planning, that's right, planning yeah, totally 'shut up' Kellie ran to where she knew the team to be just in time to see captain Blondie jump out the open door.
"He had better have a parachute on"
Natasha turned to me. "No, he jumped out without one for the shits and giggles."
You could practically see the sarcasm.
After about 20 minutes spent arguing about whether or not she should try some ramen? Tony, Captain Blondie and two strangers walked through the still open door...
'How had she not noticed that because your stupid she had a feeling she had stuck out her tongue to herself; she shrugged. Oh well, not her problem...
"sooo, who's the guy in tights."
Bruce, who had just come in to see what had happened, burst into laughter, soon followed by Natasha and Tony.
"This is Thor, and his brother Loki" Captain Blondie didn't look as amused with my comments.
I was about to ask if Loki was the Loki god of mischief and mayhem but was thwarted by the evil Cyclops Nicky Danm.
The following 10 minutes or so were a blur to Kellie as the Cyclops named Nicky had yelled out orders left, right and centre and personally escorted Loki to his jail cell. He didn't even get to ask if Loki was THE Loki. She was ushered into a room with Bruce, Captain Blondie and Tights as she was going to call him to cause come on, who wears tights anymore... Except for Captain Blondie, but he has an excuse!
Loki walked directly up to the camera, shown on Steve's computer screen before they all closed down.
"He grows on you, doesn't he?" Bruce quipped, trying not to show that he was upset by Loki's comments about him, although it showed in his eyes.
Kelli had to butt in if only to help her friend "oh yeah, I can just see myself having tea with him now" it worked as she could see Bruce give a slight chuckle.
"Loki's gonna drag this out," Captain Blondie predicted
Kelli snorted "you think", she muttered lowly so only Bruce could hear her.
"So, Thor, what's his play?"
"He has an army called the Chitauri," Tights informed the group, "They're not of Asgard, nor any world has known. He means to lead them against your people. They will win him the Earth in return, I expect, for the Tesseract."
"An army…" Captain Blondie said sceptically, "…from outer space."
Kellie whacked her head on the table. "I had to have Jinxed it, didn't I."
She could see Bruce chuckling at her misfortune, only to stop at the look on Captain Blondie's face.
"So, he's building another portal," Bruce deduced, "That's what he needs Erik Selvig for."
"Selvig?" Tights questioned, clearly shocked to be hearing the name.
"He's an astrophysicist," Bruce explained.
"He's a friend," Tights replied. Kellie felt sorry for the guy to have found out like that.
"Loki has him under some sort of spell, along with one of ours," Natasha explained, although it was a touchy subject for her. Kelli had a feeling it was Clint as she hadn't seen him about
"
"I want to know why Loki let us take him," Captain Blondie's face brought up as it was still bothering him, "he's not leading an army from here."
"You never know he could say he is a god after all, right" Kellie chimed in brightly.
"I don't think we should be focusing on Loki," Bruce suggested, "that guy's brain is a bag full of cats. You could smell crazy on him." Kellie fell off her chair at that
"Have a care how you speak," Thor said imperiously, "Loki is beyond reason, but he is of Asgard. And he is my brother."
"He killed 80 people in two days," Natasha said disbelievingly as if wondering who would associate with the man after that family member or not. Kellie secretly agreed.
"He's adopted," Thor was quick to point out upon hearing this room." Oi, I am adopted," Kellie yelled, not liking the reasoning at all Tights did look a bit apologetic at that.
"I think it's about the mechanics," Bruce theorised, trying to break the awkward silence, "Iridium… what do they need the iridium for?"
"It's a stabilising agent," Tony said as he entered the room in a black T-shirt and jeans. Similar to what Kellie's cousin wore when he went out, which was clearly what he wore under his suit.
"I'm just saying, pick a weekend. I'll fly you to Portland," Toni said, returning to his conversation with Phil, "Keep love alive."
"Yeah, keep love alive", Kellie cheered to amuse Bruce further
"Phil was embarrassed that Tony was talking about this in front of the group. Which made Kellie laugh to his slight horror and gestured that he should turn back to the other conversation topic.
"It means the portal won't collapse on itself as it did at SHIELD," Tony explained before pausing next to Thor, "no hard feelings, Point Break. You've got a mean swing."
"I apologise; I did not know…." Tights began.
"I said no hard feelings," Tony reiterated as he made his way open to the computer screens before continuing with his explanation as if he had never stopped.
"Also, the portal can open wide and stay open as long as Loki wants." Kellie getting a bit confused went over what he said slowly, figuring he was right, stopped and went along with it
He turned to face the computer screens before muttering, "Raise the mizzenmast. Jib the topsails," completely confusing all the SHIELD agents (and Kellie until she realised the Agent was playing a game) working on the floor. "That man is playing Galaga. He thought we wouldn't notice, but we did," he exclaimed, pointing at a SHIELD agent sitting in the last row.
Kellie saw it was the same Agent she threatened and smiled creepily, making him go pale.
"Tony frowned and briefly covered his left eye with her hand before asking, "How does Fury even see these?"
"He turns," Agent Hill said exasperatedly.
"Sounds exhausting," Toni joked, obviously knowing Hill wouldn't see the humour in the situation. "No, he's a Cyclopes", she randomly yelled out, making Bruce, Tony and tights laugh.
"The rest of the raw materials," he continued suddenly back on track again.
"Agent Barton can get his hands on pretty easily," Kellie felt rather sad; she had only just noticed he had not been there.
He began clearing things from the screens only to have something to do with her hands; she noticed,
"The only major component he still needs is a power source of high-energy density. Something" Tony slipped another similar tiny metal device to the force field from earlier onto the computer systems using his clearing of the screens as a cover.
Only Kellie seemed to have noticed 'very slick', she thought utterly impressed.
"When did you become an expert in thermonuclear astrophysics?" Agent Hill asked.
"Last night," Tony clarified, "the packet, Selvig's notes, the extraction theory papers. Am I the only one who did the reading?"
"Does Loki need any particular kind of power source?" Captain Blondie's asked, clearly not comfortable with Tony's ability to quickly process information. This made Kellie cackle to herself quietly.
"He would have to heat the Cube to 120-million Kelvin just to break through the Coulomb barrier," Bruce said, suddenly butting in.
"Unless Selvig has figured out how to stabilise the quantum tunnelling effect," Tony said, walking forward visibly thrilled that someone understood what she had been saying.
"Well, if he could do that, he could achieve heavy ion fusion at any reactor on the planet," Bruce replied.
"Finally, someone who speaks English," Toni said, pleased. Kellie getting bored with all the science talk, yelled that she was going to see Loki; the guys all caught up with talking and planning didn't notice her cry, and Natasha just nodded.
It took her all five minutes to find Loki's cage; she walked up to the glass and pulled a chair from nowhere to sit in. This had got his attention.
"If you are here to appeal to my better nature, then you have wasted your time", he sneered.
Kellie just gave him an I-am-not-impressed look and ignored his statement
"Is it true you tricked Thor into a dress to get his hammer back?" she asked eagerly
"Pardon?" Loki seemed a bit surprised at how random the question
"Did you or did you not trick Thor into a dress?" Kellie asked him if he was a bit slow.
"Yes, I did...why?" he asked, a bit freaked out at Kellie's question.
"because I wanted to know and talk to a fellow prankster, of course", Kellie yelled happily.
As they went on to talk about pranks they had both done, Loki's eyes bled back to green, and Bruce felt a shiver go up his spine, warning him about the future doom. He pitied Nicky. He did; Loki didn't notice he had called the man by Kellie's nickname, nor did he care...