And this songfic is especially for dear Nom Anor - featuring "My name is ..." from 1999, sung by Eminem to whom of course all rights of this song do belong.
Is it just mere coincidence, that in the very same year "Vector Prime" by R. A. Salvatore was published? So let's celebrate the 20th anniversary of both!
My name is ... Nom Anor!
Hi! My name's Pedric Cuf (Who?)
My name is... Yu'shaa (What?)
My name is... Nom Anor!
Hi! My name's Pedric Cuf (Who?)
My name is... Yu'shaa (What?)
My name is... Nom Anor!
Hi! My name's Pedric Cuf (Who?)
My name is... Yu'shaa (What?)
My name is... Nom Anor!
Excuse me!
Can I have the attention of the class for one second?
Hi, kids! Do you like violence? (Yeah-yeah-yeah!)
Wanna see my Plaeryn Bol spit at a twitch of my eyelid? (Uh-huh!)
Wanna copy me and do exactly like I did? (Yeah yeah!)
Try 'kid and get kriffed up worse than my life is? (Huh?)
My shaping teacher wanted to flunk me in junior high
Thanks a lot, next semester, I'll be fifty-five
I smacked him in his face with a thud bug
Chased him with a Yorik-et*, blorashing* his nuts into a stack (Ow-w-w-w!)
At Tatooine in Chalmun's club, had my Ooglith zipped up
Became the bartender, chased all the droids asunder
Extragalactic I am, slicing through dewback traffic jam
In a Tsik Vai*, while they're screamin' at me, ("Let's just be friends!")
You know I did conquer star by star - So here I stand
For my screaming fans letting them kiss my hand. (Ahh! Ahhhhh!)
This guy at Ord Cantrell asked for my help (Dude, can I get your help?)
So I signed it: 'Dear Xandie, thanks for the support, brenzlit!'
Hi! My name's Pedric Cuf (Who?)
My name is... Yu'shaa (What?)
My name is... Nom Anor! ...
(Three more times)
My brain's dead weight, I'm tryin to get my head straight
Just musing if Mara or Leia with Coomb spores to contaminate (Umm...)
And Vergere said, "Nom Anor you're a basehead!"
Uh-uh! "Then why's your face so odd? Man, you wasted!"
At Rhommamool I fell off with my A-Wing on my ass
Faster than the Falcon, which went down too fast
C'mere Solo! (Nommie, wait a minute, that's my ship, Phahg!)
I don't give a kriff, Gods sent me to piss that galaxy off!
Well, since age twelve, I've felt like I'm someone else
'Cause with more than an Ooglith I clad my original self
After Ebaq 9 where all my plans did crash
I replaced Viqi Shesh by Niiriit Esh.
Ninety-nine percent of my life I was lied to
I've found out, my gods weren't but fluff galore (Damn!)
Still I came here to be their Executor
Stirring all up to surpass each, spilling some gore (Oh, thank you!)
Hi! My name's Pedric Cuf (Who?)
My name is... Yu'shaa (What?)
My name is... Nom Anor! ...
(Three more times)
Stop Dark Tide! This guy needs to be locked away! (Get him!)
Mara Jade, don't just stand there, operate!
I'm not ready to leave, it's too scary to die (Khapet!)
I'll have to stay on this citadel ship to be buried alive (Huh, yup!)
Am I comin' or goin'? I can barely decide
I just drank a fifth of Kri'gee; dare me to fly? (Guvvuk!)
All my life I was very deprived
I ain't had a woman in years - now my palm is too scarred to hide (Whoops!)
Ooglith ripped off like the Incredible Hulk (Hahh-too)
Prepping my Plaeryn Bol to spit on naughty folk (C'mere)
Like when I was little, used to get so hungry that I would throw fists in my crèche.
So angry like the worlds here that I did smash! (Waah, wahh!)
I lay awake and strap myself in the bed
Put on a blasterproof Ooglith and shoot myself in the head (T'uq!)
You deem me dead? (Arrhh!) Tell Shimrra's by his eyes so red (Yeah?)
That on his Hau polyp throne I sat, in this dream I had.
Hi! My name's Pedric Cuf (Who?)
My name is... Yu'shaa (What?)
My name is... Nom Anor! ...
(Three more times)
Author's notes:
*Yorik-et: Coral skipper, Starfighter of the Yuuzhan Vong
*blorashing: verb derived from Blorash, a jelly used by the Yuuzhan Vong to immobilize enemies by gluing their feet and other body parts together or to the ground
*Tsik Vai: Living air speeder of the Yuuzhan Vong