Chapter 2 - painful memories

-Past-

After Marinette overheard Adrien she rushed back to the group and tried to shake what she had heard from her mind. 'Maybe I'm jumping to conclusions' she thought. What girl could he be talking about? Alya nudged Marinette sensing that her best friend was off. Marinette forced a smile and gave her a thumbs up. Alya didn't say anything and decided it was just nerves over the confession. "So when are you gonna do it?" Alya asked quietly.

"I'm just waiting for the right moment. I'm gonna do it…" Marinette assured. She didn't know if she was trying to convince Alya or herself.

The group finished setting up the tables with all the food. The blankets and chairs were all set up too. Everyone fixed their plates and sat in circle around a fire pit. The sun started to set and people had broken off in their groups. Some people were posing for pictures while others were laughing about their high school memories. Marinette didn't touch her food, a hole felt like it was forming in her stomach. She had been very quiet, watching her friends discuss their graduation plans and joke about what a crazy year it had been.

Adrien had gotten up quietly from his place and started walking towards the other side of the park. "Oh! Mari! This is your chance!" Alya excitedly whispered while pointing to the blonde. Marinette nodded and got up to follow.

The other side of the park had pavilions where the lights hadn't been turned on. She found Adrien sitting at the furthest pavilion muttering to himself in the dark. Hearing her approach he looked up and gave a small smile to Marinette. "I was hoping I would see you Marinette" he said motioning for her to sit with him. Marinette blushed and slowly sat on the bench next to him.

Adrien stared out into the darkness. "Im sure you've heard since Nino can't keep a secret, I'm leaving Marinette. I got accepted to an American University. My father is actually letting me go. He thinks it would be safer since they don't have any akuma attacks there. He was the one who suggested I apply if you can believe that." Adrien chuckled to himself thinking how unlike his dad the whole thing was. Adrien turned to Marinette, "You were one of the last people I wanted to say goodbye to. You were my first real friend here and it's been hard saying goodbye to everyone. This is probably the hardest one yet. "

Thank god it was dark because Marinette knew her face was a deep shade of red. Now was the time, she had to say it. "About that… there's something I need to tell you Adrien..." Marinette muttered softly.

-Present-
Marinette's timer went off and she shook herself out of her daze. She had to start getting ready to meet Alex. She slowly emerged from the hot water and stepped onto her fuzzy bath rug. Marinette examined her wet body in the full length mirror that leaned against the opposite wall. Her skin was pale enough that it was almost see through. She was a starving artist and it showed. Her collar bones were very pronounced and if she lifted her arms, you could see her ribs. Marinette cupped her breasts that overfilled her hands pushing them up and together and then let them gentle bounce back into place. At least there was one nice change from being a teenager. Marinette turned to the side and examined her profile. Her butt had always been too big for her liking. Marinette pulled a towel off the rack and wrapped it around herself. 'Time to put a face on my face' she thought.

An hour and a half had passed and Marinette was standing outside of the Piano bar waiting for Alex who had texted he saying he was running late and still getting ready. Models. Marinette decided she should go in and get a drink to prepare for the evening to come. Marinette actually put some effort into her outfit this evening. She wore a tight black pencil skirt that came a little past her knees and had on a red body suit with sleeves that had exposed shoulders. Her skinny black heels were borrowed from a show last summer. She wore her hair straight down her back. It had grown out a lot, coming down to the middle of her back. Her adolescent bangs were no more. She slide onto a stool and waved the bartender over. Two glasses of Merlot later and still no Alex. Marinette tugged on her dangly gold earrings and swiveled on her stool facing the piano. To her disgust she spotted a blonde woman leaning against the Piano holding a martini. Chloe. Marinette was about to turn away to hide her face but stopped when she spotted Adrien heading in Chloe's direction holding out her purse. Perfect, Marinette thought.

Marinette turned around thinking maybe she hadn't been noticed yet. She flagged the bartender once more and asked for one more glass and to pay her tab. The bartender took care of her drink order and then gave her a smile. "Your tab was picked up already" the bartender said.

Confused Marinette turned around and met eyes with Adrien. He gave a devilish smile and started to walk over.

Marinette took a quick sip of her wine and realized she was quite buzzed already.

"Of all the places in Paris, you have your date here?" Adrien said slyly.

'Not much of a date, he is 45 minutes late' she thought.

"I see you had the same idea" Marinette said while gesturing to Chloe who was busy berating the musician to change the song.

"Oh we're not on a date. I promised her a while ago I'd bring her here. But not as a date." Adrien assured.

Marinette was confused. He sure was dressed like he was on a date. He wore navy dress pants that were rolled above the ankle and a tight button down white collared shirt tucked into a brown belt and brown dress shoes. On his wrist was an expensive looking leather watch and his signature silver ring.

"I don't see your date anywhere actually. Did you get stood up?" Adrien asked putting his hand above his eyes, playfully squinting while looking around.

"No, I just came early. I like the music." Marinette defended shoving his arm. Adrien just shrugged and sat on the spot next to Marinette. He ordered a glass of wine for himself and brushed his hand through his hair. It looked so blonde and soft. He had the sides loosely gelled back. Marinette took a sip forcing herself to break her gaze. Adrien noticed.

"You didn't have to pay for my drinks, Adrien." Marinette said holding up her glass.

Adrien smiled. "Well, I feel like you weren't happy to see me earlier today and I'm trying to make peace. Seven years is a long time to hold a grudge."

Adrien kicked himself, why did he say that. It was totally his fault for the way things went that night. "Sorry, I didn't mean that, I just want to make amends I guess. We were good friends before all of that..." Adrien trailed off not really sure what to say next.

Marinette grimaced slightly and quickly took another sip of her wine trying to cover her face. Why was he so intent on making her like him again? He could be friends with whoever he wanted. The emotional torment she had to endure all those years ago hadn't been completely forgotten, yet he seemed oblivious to it. "I don't want to talk about it, let's just never bring it up again." she whispered into her glass.

Alex finally appeared at the front of the bar looking around for Marinette. Spotting her, he winked and casually made his way over. No apologies for being almost an hour late. Really the only thing going for him was that he was a good looking guy. He had a light blue button down shirt that had the sleeves rolled up revealing his tattoo sleeve. He wore tight white pants and had his long brown hair pulled back in a bun. He had a tattoo running down the side of his neck that Marinette knew turned into a chest and shoulder piece. Before they had gone back to her apartment the night before, he had spent quite a bit of time explaining each tattoo in detail.

Alex clapped Adrien on the shoulder. "Adrien Agreste! Thanks for keeping Dupain-Cheng company. I wasn't expecting to run into you again… so soon."

Adrien pulled his shoulder away and flashed an amused smile to Marinette. "You kids have fun" he said raising his glass and turning away to rejoin Chloe.

"Famous models are so full of themselves, he didn't even look at me." Alex said sitting onto the spot next to Marinette.

Marinette didn't respond and turned away, not wanting to face where Adrien was standing. Watching him interact with Chloe was always torture. Taking another sip of her wine she flagged the bartender. "Okay, maybe one more" she said gesturing to her glass that was only half way gone.

The bartender just nodded and took Alex's drink order as well.

The traffic in the bar slowed down and the pianist played somber tunes to match Marinette's mood. Alex had been prattling on about his upcoming shows and how he needed new pictures for his portfolio. Marinette had barely said anything and was at this point, pretty tipsy.

"What do you think, a series of black and white torso shots or a couple of 3 quarter headshots maybe? I need something edgy and fresh if I'm going to get into the winter collection."

"I think I'm ready to call it a night" Marinette said. She grabbed Alex's arm and pulled him to follow her. As soon as Marinette got up from her stool the room started spinning causing her to almost loose her balance. Alex laughed and put his arm around her waist. "Geez Dupain-Cheng, you're such a lightweight!"

Marinette blushed and straightened herself up. She held on to Alex's arm and started towards the front. After a few steps she paused. She was going to be sick. She hurried to the restrooms that were to the right side of the piano stage only to be stopped by Adrien. The concerned look on his face made Marinette feel embarrassed for getting so drunk.

"Excuse me" she said pushing past him into the restroom.

Marinette held herself together splashing cool water on her face. She took a few sips and braced herself over the sink. She wasn't going to vomit. Not here. Not with Adrien waiting outside the door.

After a couple of minutes Marinette composed herself and straighten out her skirt. Can't hide out in here forever.

Adrien was pulling open the door just as Marinette went for the handle. Letting himself slide in the closet of a bathroom, he closed the door and locked it. "What are you doing?!" Marinette squealed.

Adrien looked over Marinette. She was pale and he could tell she was having trouble standing straight. "Marinette look at you. Why didn't he feed you? You've only had wine all night?" Adrien asked.

Someone tugged on the bathroom door and they both froze. After a moment came a knock.

"Marinette are you ready to go? You're taking forever." It was an impatient Alex.

"Let me take you home. I don't like that guy Mari." Adrien whispered.

Marinette was too drunk for this. Adrien was always too nice, he would never understand how this overly caring attitude had crushed her heart before. He was even using her nickname as if they were still so close.

"I'll be fine. I've been taking care of myself for a while without your help." Mari said looking away. Tears were stinging the corners of her eyes.

Adrien gently put his knuckle under her chin tilting her to face him. "Come on Marinette. Why are you pushing me away?"

"Do you really not know the answer to that, Adrien? You were there when it happened. You saw what I did," Marinette shook her head not wanting to finish that thought. It was still so painful. The hole in her chest started to ache.

Another knock stopped Marinette as she stared into Adrien's green eyes with his hand still gently holding her chin up to face him.

Marinette pulled away from Adrien's hand and left the bathroom.

Marinette didn't end up leaving with Alex. She pushed passed him and headed straight out into the street. She pulled off her heels and decided she was close enough to walk to Alya's apartment.

A few blocks later and a buzz from the intercom, Marinette found herself on Alya's sofa crying softly into her friend's pillow.

"Mari, I don't understand. You had Adrien buying you drinks and offering to take you home, while you were on a date, and you think he doesn't have feelings for you?" Alya asked.

"That's not how it was. You know how he is. He was just trying to be friends again." Marinette whined.

Alya rolled her eyes and handed her best friend a tissue. "What's wrong with that? You have moved on. You've seen other people. Just be friends with him then."

Marinette sighed and gave Alya a pained look. Alya should know better than anyone that being just friends with Adrien was impossible. Eventually her heart would betray her again.

-Past-

"What was it you wanted to tell me, Mari?" Adrien asked leaning closer to Marinette. She looked especially cute today. She had on a mini overall dress with thigh high socks and white Keds. Her hair was pulled back in her signature pigtails.

"Well... I've wanted to say it for a while, actually. And now with you leaving I knew I couldn't wait anymore." Marinette paused and bit her lip. Oh god.

"I... I'm i-in love with you Adrien." Marinette said.

Adrien stared at her in amazement. "Marinette... I..." he stopped not sure of what to say. Marinette was one of his closest friends. Up until now he had been sure she was involved with Luka. Adrien had never really acknowledged his feelings for Marinette because of this. Did he have feelings for her? She was Marinette, he liked everything about her. Everyone did. Adrien didn't know how to process this confession.

"I'm sorry. I-I didn't know. Why didn't you say something sooner?" Adrien asked slowly.

Not the response she was expecting but Marinette shrugged, unable to look up at his face. She had a question of her own. "I overheard you talking with Nino earlier. I didn't mean to. When you were in the parking lot. Who were you talking about?"

Adrien looked away feeling guilty. How was he supposed to explain to Marinette that he was in love with Ladybug? He couldn't reveal his secret identity as Chat Noir.

Panicking he scrambled for a response. "It- it's Chloe" he said softly. Adrien immediately kicked himself. He knew that Marinette and Chloe did not get along very well.

"Chloe" Marinette said to herself. She wanted to cry. She wanted to slap Adrien across the face. How could it be her? Was he really so shallow? So naive to her true nature? Chloe. Marinette stood up and started walking away from Adrien.

"Mari wait!" Adrien shouted.

She paused and turned to look back at him. "Have a good trip, Adrien". And with that she took off into the parking lot.

Adrien was left sitting there still wondering. Marinette loves me?

-Present-

After Marinette and Alya passed out on the couch, Nino, who had been patiently listening in the kitchen decided he need to help his best man out.

He walked into the bedroom and dialed Adrien's number.

"Hey man. They just feel asleep." Nino whispered. Adrien has texted earlier checking to see if Marinette had gone to their place after she ran out of the bar.

"Okay, I'm glad she went there and not with that guy she was with. He was ridiculous Nino. What's gotten into Marinette? She's way too good for someone like that. So self absorbed and so unaware of what she is." Adrien huffed. He pictured Marinette sitting at the bar, her bare pale shoulders and long dark hair taunting him. When he had watched her walk in from across the bar it felt like fate that he found himself in the same place as her.

He had taken Chloe home and was just settling down into his couch at his new apartment. He had been pacing thinking of Marinette and how she had just left him standing there in the bathroom. Once again with tears in her eyes.

"I don't know what to tell you man. She's been this way for a while. Alya says she is just filling a void and isn't interested in finding anything serious. Especially after what happened."

Adrien rubbed his temples. 7 years ago. What a disaster. He had told Marinette a lie to cover his feelings for Ladybug. Feelings that were never reciprocated. Feelings he never got to express because Ladybug had disappeared.