This was not comfortable.
But Mob had to put herself through it. There was nothing else that she could do. Even if it was hot and itchy. Even if the straps were digging into her back and arms. So what if she had to keep on tugging it up. This was worth it. This was the most worth it. Rei had said so.
You had to suffer, sometimes, to look good.
Master Reigen had said that, once, when Mob asked her why she wore high heeled shoes even though they hurt her feet. You had to suffer for beauty. Mob didn't think that she was beautiful. Teru told her that a lot but he told her a lot of nice things just to make her happy. Mob knew that she was normal looking at best. Tsubomi was beautiful. Mob looked nothing like Tsubomi. Even if Rei used up every single trick and hack she had stored up Mob would still never be anywhere as pretty as Tsubomi and the other girls like her. Pretty popular girls who didn't still wear undershirts and stuff like that.
Mob missed the undershirt.
She missed how warm it was, how soft, and how she didn't have to tug at it nonstop. No matter how many times she tugged at it with her powers and even by hand when she thoughts that nobody was looking she never managed to make this thing even the least bit comfortable. How did adults walk around like this? Mob wanted to go back to the undershirt. She had her whole life to be uncomfortable. She had her whole life to walk around with this…she didn't even have words for it…on and tugging at her skirt and pinching and…and….
Sometimes you had to suffer to look nice.
And she had a very good reason for wanting to look nice. For not only wearing a bra but also making it look, through the magic of life hacks, like she actually had a reason to wear a bra. She had a good reason to put herself through it and that reason was named Teru and he liked to kiss her and also other things. There were finally other things and it was great…at least she had always imagined that they would be greats...but instead of being great they were mostly just anxiety inducing.
That was the word for when you couldn't even feel good because you were so focused on every other thing besides how his hand actually FELT.
Mob hadn't planned on it. They had just been kissing, like they liked to sometimes, and then his hand had just gone up to her chest…and she knew that it was supposed to feel good. That was why people did stuff like that, to feel good, but Mob hadn't been able to feel anything but worried. Worried about if he liked it…because she had seen some of the girls that he went out with and Mob knew that she did not measure up…and then she got this idea in her head that he was thinking about those girls and not her…and then he thought that she didn't like it so now, really, they were most likely back to square one…and Mob didn't want to go back to square one! She had barely gone past square one and gotten to square two. Mob could not go back to square one when she had already been to square two.
She knew that she needed help.
And Rei was helpful. She was the one who had the idea of filling two balloons with pudding and then sticking them in a bra. There. Rei said that they were indistinguishable from the real things. Mob wasn't sure about that but she wasn't going to complain. She had done so much to help…and Mob was grateful. Now at least she looked like she had something that was there to feel…even if she couldn't feel anything…but at least she wouldn't feel worried and embarrassed and nervous and all of those other feelings that made her feel like she was losing control of her powers or would lose control or-
This may not have been comfortable but it was worth it.
Besides, it wouldn't be for too much longer. She just had to get through this work day and then she would see Teru again, the thought makes her turn bright red, and then she could go home and take this thing off and be free of it until tomorrow…and the next day…and the next day…for the rest of her life. She doesn't know how people do it. She's tempted to ask Master Reigen how she dealt with this every single day. She probably had some way of getting through it…and Mob really wanted to ask.
Because this was the worst.
"Hey Mob, how about we go get some snacks. I'm getting hungry." Said Reigen as Mob tugged, again, at the bra that she was wearing. The bright pink one…that she was wearing underneath her white school shirt….and also that she had stuffed with at least half a box of tissues on each side. Reigen knew that she had to say something. It was her duty to tell Mob that it was not a good look for her…
Or anyone.
Reigen knew that she had to say something. When she was Mob's age she tried out the same thing…to disastrous results. Maybe trying that little trick out on the same day that they were starting gymnastics in gym hadn't been the best idea. Thank God that someone threw up a month later during health class. Well something like that wouldn't be there to save Mob. Reigen could not let that happen to her. Nope. She wouldn't be able to call herself 'Master' anymore if she just let her student walk headfirst into oncoming embarrassment.
So they needed to have one of their patented Master and Student talks.
"Ok Master Reigen." Said Mob. She didn't really want to do anything that involved a lot of walking. Walking meant bouncing and bouncing meant rubbing up against her skirt and tugging at her shoulders and sides. But if Master Reigen needed her then of course she would help.
Even if every step was worse than the one before it.
She hated this. She wished that she had just stayed in her undershirt even if she did look like she was in elementary school. She was in her third year of high school and she still wore an undershirt and she should have just accepted herself for who she was instead of trying to change to become who she thought that she was supposed to be. That was the lesson to be learned in all of this. At least that was something that she figured Master Reigen would have said if this was one of their master and student talks.
Which it eventually became.
"Mob, we have to talk about something." Said Reigen as they walked down the street and through the summer sun together. It wasn't fall yet despite what the calendar said. That was another reason why she needed to inform Mob of her predicament. Sweat and white did not go together well.
"Usually when you say that we have to talk about something it's usually either something embarrassing or I did something wrong…or you did something wrong. What's wrong?" asked Mob. She didn't want anything to be wrong….or for this to be one of their embarrassing talks. She thought, for a moment, that Master Reigen knew. Tome had known just from looking at her. She had barely set one foot in the club room before Tome dragged her out by her wrist and asked her a million and one questions because 'it was obvious that something happened' even though Mob hadn't even said a word.
Apparently it had been written all over her face.
She wondered if it was still written all over her face. It had happened just a couple days ago…but she was still thinking about it nonstop. The way they had been kissing. The way he told her that she was the most beautiful girl in the entire world. The way the he seemed so much taller than her even if it was a few centimeters at most. The way his hand had felt going up from her waist to her chest. How nervous she had been. How sad she had been once she realized that he had done this before. How embarrassed she had felt when she realized that he had probably spent the whole time thinking about how he could have been with a girl who actually had something there to touch.
So maybe it was still written all over her face.
"It's of the embarrassing variety." Said Reigen. Now was not the time to be beating around the bush. They had to talk. Mob could not walk around like that. People sucked, they would make fun of her, and also it was just impractical.
"It is?" asked Mob
"Yup." Said Reigen
"Does it have to be?" asked Mob
"I think so." Said Reigen
"Um….do we have to?" asked Mob. She knew that she should not have been doing stuff like that with Teru. She shouldn't have even thought about doing stuff like that with Teru. Mom had said so. Mob didn't know how something that felt good could be bad…and she didn't know why it was ok for boys but not for girls….but she did know that she did not want to talk about it with anyone. If it was something that she would get in trouble for doing…or even if it wasn't since it was kind of private…she did not want to talk about this with Master Reigen.
"Mob…we kind of do. I can't let you walk around like this." said Reigen stopping in some shade. The last thing that either of them needed was heat stroke. Reigen couldn't wait for the winter…but of course by the time winter came she would have been wishing for summer.
"Like what?" asked Mob
"Like that." Said Reigen
"Oh no…it is written all over my face." Said Mob. She covered her face and shook her head. She wished that her hair had been longer, that she had never cut it, because then she could have hidden behind it and maybe if she hid for long enough then Master Reigen could have changed her mind and they could have talked about something else or kept on going to get snacks…or something.
"I have no idea what you're talking about…but now I feel like I should." Said Reigen. She stole a glance at Mob. Nothing was written all over her face…and Reigen wondered what it was there could have been written on her face. She was fifteen what could…well a lot of things…things that Mob should not have been getting up to. The sorts of things that could break a person's heart and ruin a person's life…and Mob did not deserve that.
"I don't want to talk about it." Said Mob quietly.
"I'm assuming that it has something to do with your new look." Said Reigen
"Um…yes. But do we have to talk about it? I mean…" said Mob. She did not want to get into why she looked the way she did. Not even with Master Reigen.
"Mob, you have to wear an undershirt. Ok? You can't wear a white shirt and no undershirt. Well either that or a slip but I think that I might be the last woman in Japan who wears a slip…even though it's a lot more comfortable than it looks." Said Reigen
"But I don't need an undershirt because I have a bra on. Isn't it an either or thing?" asked Mob. She had always assumed that it was either or. Rei never said that she had to wear an undershirt and she had been wearing a bra since elementary school.
"Well sometimes it can be…but this is not one of those times. Never with a bra that's not the same color as your top…and even then never like that." Said Reigen
"Like what?" asked Mob
"Mob, if you're going to stuff your bra then you should at least do it gradually." Said Reigen
"H-How can you tell-" asked Mob
"The fact that you went up two cup sizes is one night was a pretty big clue." Said Reigen
"Oh…but Rei said that nobody would be able to tell." Said Mob
"No offense to Rei but I've seen her wear bronzer as foundation." Said Reigen
"She was trying to look less pale." Said Mob. Rei knew what she was talking about. She knew a lot about this sort of thing. More than Mob knew anyway…but still a lot less than Master Reigen knew…
"Well then I'd say mission accomplished." Said Reigen with a shake of her head.
"She did look less pale." Said Mob. Rei knew what she was doing. She had done what she had set out to do…and Mob thought that she'd looked nice. Well Rei always looked nice…and not like in that way that Mob thought that all of her friends looked pretty while she just looked pretty plain.
"Yeah that's true but bronzer is not foundation. Just…Rei doesn't know everything, alright? She's only a year younger than you, you know." Said Reigen
"I know. I was at her birthday party." Said Mob. She knew that Rei was younger than her. She didn't know why Master Reigen felt the need to point out the obvious. Even though Rei was younger than her she still knew more about these sorts of things than Mob did. She also looked older than Mob, too, but then again even some first years looked older than her.
"Rei knows more about this than I do. That's why I believed her when she said that nobody would be able to tell…but if you could tell then…" said Mob. Oh no. Now she was probably being made fun of…and she had just started a new school year too!
"No, not everyone." Said Reigen lying through her teeth. Well not really a lie because she couldn't speak for the thoughts of everyone that Mob had come into contact with that day. Besides, it was for the greater good. Mob was freaking out…not that Reigen was going to make it into a habit to lie to Mob again…because that was a slippery slope that she did not want to start down again….
"But you just said-" said Mob
"Not everyone is as observant as me. No, I bet that hardly anyone noticed…yet. But they will which is why I'm talking to you about this now. I'm just trying to save you from getting made fun of. It is your last year of middle school after all." said Reigen. She really wished that she hadn't lied…or at least stretched the truth…but she did not want to have Mob freaking out. No, she didn't need that…and neither did the rest of the city. They had barely rebuilt from the last big psychic crisis.
"It is...and I don't want anyone to make fun of me. That's why I did this." said Mob
"You didn't want to be made fun of…so you stuffed your bra full of tissues? Mob, that's not a good id-" said Reigen
"Pudding." Said Mob
"What?" asked Reigen
"It isn't stuffed with tissues, it's stuffed with pudding." Said Mob. That detail was very important. Rei had been very thorough in her explanation as to why the classic tissue trick didn't work. Tissues didn't look real enough and if you got wet then it was game over. There was nothing worse than getting caught in the rain and then having everyone figure out the horrible truth. Not that Mob planned on getting caught in the rain anytime soon…but she hadn't wanted to argue with Rei. She was the expert after all.
"Pudding….? How did you even managed to stuff your bra with pudding?" asked Reigen. She got the mental image of Mob pouring pudding down her shirt…which was downright ridiculous but that was the only way that Reigen could imagine that working out.
"It's actually balloons full of pudding." Said Mob
"Seriously?" asked Reigen. Why didn't young her think of that. It was so much easier to get them both at the same size and shape…and they looked more natural too…not that Reigen was still self-conscious about that. No, she was almost thirty. She was way, way, WAY past that. She had to be.
"Yes. Rei said that it would be a good idea…" said Mob
"Well it sort of was…but, really, the risk of getting caught is just too great. Also you flew too close to the sun with this. Try and keep it realistic next time…not that there even should be a next time. You're fine just the way you are, Mob." Said Reigen
"I'm not though…I mean I feel like I'm not. I don't know. I just feel like everyone else is prettier than me or cuter or…just…more. And I never feel like enough. I don't know why I feel like this. I mean you tell me that I'm fine and Teru tells me that I'm pretty…the pretty girl he's ever seen…but I think that he might just be telling me what I want to hear." Said Mob
"This again? Mob, there is nothing wrong with the way you look. Nothing at all. I mean we all have things about ourselves that we aren't happy with but, really, in my experience nobody cares about those things as much as we do." Said Reigen
"Really?" asked Mob
"Yeah. Honestly you're your own worst critic. The things that you notice about yourself? Not a lot of other people notice. Everyone's got their own things that they're worried about." Said Reigen. She did not want to go back to be being Mob's age. To feel, constantly, like you were being stared at. Well she had never really moved past that feeling when she thought about it…
"I know that people have their own things that they worry about…and I guess that most people wouldn't care…but I care. I mean I care and…and I think that Teru cares. I mean he tells me things like…like he thinks that I'm pretty and stuff…but sometimes I feel like he just tells me what I want to hear. I mean I've seen his old girlfriend…a few of them…and-" said Mob
"Mob, no. None of that. Haystack likes you and you know it." Said Reigen. She wanted to tell Mob that these insecurities would fade with time but that would have been a bold faced lie. These insecurities never went away, infact some of them got even worse with age. She knew that she had no reason to think the same sorts of thoughts that Mob did, that Serizawa would find some minute flaw within her and hit the road, so she had no right to lie to Mob's face and tell her that it would get better.
"I know he does but sometimes when we…um…when we're together I just get this feeling that he doesn't like me…or that he just says things to make me happy…and I know that's not true but I still feel like it's true and…and then I just get so sad and worried…and that's just how I feel." Said Mob
"Mob…I'm not going to lie to you and tell you that those feelings ever go away. They don't. They get a lot quieter and sometimes it can seem like they're gone but they always find some way of coming back. It's alright, though, because the older you get the better you get at not listening to these sorts of feelings. You're fine the way you and if someone really cares about you then they won't care about superficial things like that." Said Reigen motioning towards Mob and Rei's better on paper than in real life idea.
"I…I guess." Said Mob. She wanted to trust Master Reigen on this, she really did, but it was hard to think that far ahead. Far enough ahead that she could see herself no worried about these sorts of things. Maybe this was one of those things that could become easier as she grew up. She trusted Master Reigen even though she had lied to her before. They were past that now. Master Reigen would never lie to her again.
"It's true. Trust me on this. I've been in your shoes before…except I didn't have the bright idea to use balloons full of pudding. No, I did the old tissue trick…and that was the day that we started gymnastics in gym class. You can see where this is going." said Reigen
"Oh no…did you have to change schools?" asked Mob. That was really the only thing you could do when something like that happened to you. Change schools and then change your name and also move to a new country, too, just for good measure.
"I wanted to but my mom, ever the reasonable one, said no." said Reigen. Her mother also said that Reigen had brought it upon herself by being too lazy to grow them herself but that was not something that Mob needed to know about.
"Oh. I would have changed schools and changed my name and moved to another country if that happened to me." Said Mob
"Believe me, I wanted to. That was the most embarrassing moment of my life so far….but I recovered. That's why I wanted to warn you. You shouldn't have to recover from things like that. Trust me on this." said Reigen
"I trust you Master Reigen." Said Mob. Master Reigen was right. She had been right, before, when she told Mob not to be so worried about how she looked and stuff. Teru cared about her for who she was. That was just the truth of it. She shouldn't have been so worried. Master Reigen was right, Master Reigen was always right.
"Good. Now come on, let's get some snacks and then when we get back you can get changed. That can't possibly be comfortable." Said Reigen
"It's not…it's really not." Said Mob