The days bled together in a stream of grey weather. The dreary March rain melded into April showers. The rain seemed to decide a down pour was necessary every time I needed to head to the greenhouses for Herbology. It did feel like the weather was mimicking the way I had felt. Since the incident with Severus I had been too afraid or embarrassed or something, not even I knew why, to even talk to him. This inability had caused me sadness that could be easily remedied though I, for whatever reason, would not allow myself.
Severus had begun writing notes that would appear on my parchments during class just long enough for me to read them before they would be gone. Notes of flattery or suggestions of meeting in the Shrieking Shack, all of which went unanswered. I had to admit some of the notes made it difficult to not smile to myself, appearing unprovoked to my classmates, like some crazy person.
"Have you talked to Charles Brandon?" Susan asked.
She had decided that Charles Brandon from the Jane Austen book Sense and Sensibility was the best fit for Severus. She argued it was perfect because Charles Brandon had secrets just like Severus. I mentioned that he was a well-liked eligible bachelor who eventually won the affections of the woman he desired after waiting and a failed relationship on her part. I protested mainly because it sounded like he was very clearly a codename but she won the argument by continuing to call him Charles Brandon anyways.
I shook my head as I had every night she had asked that question.
Mark stopped asking who Charles Brandon was after the first three nights. He realized he would never get and answer out of Susan if she didn't want to share.
"You really should." She told me again.
"It's not that simple." I said.
"You keep saying that but why isn't it?" She questioned. "He clearly likes you and it's okay to be embarrassed about…you know, but…"
"It's not that I'm embarrassed." I said. "It's just been a long time since I've talked to him at all that I don't know if he even wants me anymore."
"It's been two weeks." Susan said. "Which have been filled with signs that he would be happy whenever you're ready to talk."
"This is your last chance." Susan continued. "Easter Holiday starts next week. When we return who knows what he'll have decided to do about you."
I shut my textbook. "I'm going up to bed. I'm tired."
Susan and I had been having the same conversation for the past two weeks and it seemed odd that she would be so interested in getting me to talk to a man whom she so despised.
I changed into pajamas and laid under the covers. I read a bit of Defense reading but soon my eyelids were drooping. I decided to close my eyes for a second.
I was in a dark ballroom. Everyone around me was dancing but I didn't hear any music. I didn't recognize anyone around me. A man in a suit grabbed my hand and began spinning me around in a dance. He put his hand on my waist and I looked down at it resting there. I was wearing a green dress. I looked up and over his shoulder Susan was dancing wearing a white gown. I must be at her wedding. She looked happy and her cheeks were rosy from the heat of the dance floor. I thought I heard my name and I looked up at the man with whom I was dancing. He had no face but for whatever reason that didn't seem out of place. I looked around him and saw a man with shoulder length black hair leaning against a doorway; Severus. He wore a black suit with a matching vest over a crisp white button-down shirt and as soon as we made eye contact the rest of the wedding dancers and surroundings melted away and Severus and I were alone in darkness. He walked towards me over the blackness in which we floated. His strides were long and purposeful. His eyes never left my face.
"What are you doing here?" I asked him once he came to a stop in front of me.
"I want to talk to you." He said. "If this is the only way I can get through to you then I'm going to do it."
"Get through to me?" I asked.
"You won't answer any of my notes." He said. "And you won't come down to see me after supper anymore. I've given you the chance to meet me outside of the school if you're afraid of being caught and you still didn't answer. Don't you think I was just as scared as you were when we were almost caught? Because I was. I have just as much to lose as you do. Don't leave me because you're afraid. I can help."
"I don't understand." I said. "I'm dreaming, how can you be…"
Realization clicked somewhere in my brain.
"I can't believe you would stoop so low!" I yelled at him.
"It's the only way I can speak to you." He said. "Don't be angry."
"Don't be angry?" I spat. "You're invading my mind!"
"Maybe if you wouldn't ignore me completely when I tried the other ways I wouldn't have had to resort to…"
"Legilimency!" I finished for him. "I told you not to use those books on a whim!"
"You think this is a whim?" He asked. "Two weeks without you saying a word to me, not a single utterance. This was an absolute last resort."
"I'm waking up now!" I yelled at him before I turned away.
"Ruby, stop." He objected.
"I'm going to wake up!" I said. "Wake up, wake up, wake up!"
My eyes flew open and I was laying in my bed. The room was dark and the book I had been reading was resting pages down on my stomach. I threw it to the side and separated my bed curtains. I didn't bother finding my shoes or slippers before I grabbed my wand and left the bedroom.
The common area was dark when I walked through to open the door onto the stairs heading down from the tower. The only noises in the halls were the slapping of my bare feet on the cold stone floors. I was too intent on getting to the dungeon to even think about the possibility of being caught out of bed.
Finally, I arrived at the potions classroom door. Without a second thought I pushed the door open and walked inside making an immediate turn for the open door leading to Severus' office. Severus was sitting at the table I usually did my assignments on with his head resting in his hands. He looked up and as soon as he saw me he jumped out of his seat.
I immediately grabbed a fistful of his robes and dragged him into the classroom and inside the ingredients cupboard.
"Open it." I said through gritted teeth.
"What?" He asked clearly confused about what was happening.
"Open the damn passage." I clarified.
He lifted his wand to the wall and drew a pattern and the stones molded into an opening. I grabbed his robes again and pulled him up the stairs and onto the chilly grounds. The wind whipped through my hair and the wet ground squished between my toes as I tugged him towards the Whomping Willow.
"Ruby." He said. "What's going on?"
I ignored him and continued to pull him behind me. Once we arrived at the tree I kept my steady pace to the tree though I let go of his robes until I pushed the knot to stop the movements of the limbs.
I walked back to Severus and yanked him to the passage at the base before I pushed him inside. In our current position moonlight was able to shine in through the hole and slightly illuminate Severus and I. I pushed him so that his back was pressed against the wall. I slapped him across the face. I pushed him harder against the wall followed by another hard slap to his face.
"Don't ever toy with my mind like that again." I told him.
"I'm sorry." He said. "I didn't know how else to…"
"I would have come to you when I was ready!" I said.
"And when exactly would that have been?" He asked.
"I don't know!" I said. "But I expected you to be respectful of how much time it took."
"I wanted to be there for you!" He shouted. "That's what people do when they care about someone!"
"You…you didn't go anywhere else in my mind, did you?" I asked.
"You mean your memories?" He asked.
I nodded my head.
"No." He assured me. "No, I would never do that to you. I just needed a way to talk to you so I sort of, directed your dream. I didn't do any digging."
"Good." I said. "Don't ever make me regret giving you those books."
He nodded in agreement. "Don't make me have to use it on you again."
I nodded in agreement. "Do you want to know something odd?"
"Tell me." He said.
"Susan has been very pushy about me talking to you." I said. "Which is weird because I still don't think she likes you a whole lot."
The moonlight lit his smile. "I may have had something to do with that."
"You didn't!" I exclaimed.
"I thought I would try influencing through Legilimency." He shrugged. "She wasn't as quick as you. I think she thinks those dreams were completely of her own mind."
"You're horrible!" I said.
"I thought if anyone could have any influence on you it would be Susan." He explained looking down, his brow scrunched. "Are you barefoot?"
My eyes went wide with slight embarrassment. "I didn't have time for shoes."
"Understandable." He said. "If you would have taken time to do that you might not have had time for the second slap."
He rubbed his hand against his cheek.
"I would say I was sorry," I said placing my hand on his cheek. "But you deserved it."
I gave his cheek another light slap.
"I told you I was sorry." He said again. "But you really left me no choice. Why are you so concerned? What do you have to hide?"
"I don't know!" I said sliding my back against the opposite wall until I was sitting on the ground. "I'm sure there is something embarrassing somewhere in my memory that I don't want you to see."
"And I will wait for you to tell me all about them on your own." He said.
"You'll be waiting for a long time." I said. "Because that will never happen."
He smiled down at me before sliding down the wall to sit across from me. He stretched his legs out in front of himself. His feet aligned with my hips and my feet only reached to the middle of his thigh. It always made me feel almost insignificant when it was brought to my attention how tall he really was.
"Are your feet cold?" He asked looking down at his side.
I looked down at them and wiggled the toes I could no longer feel and nodded my head. He reached down and picked up my feet and laid them in his lap and wrapped his hands around them. The warmth felt nice.
"We could just go inside." I said unsure if he really wanted to hold my dirty, cold feet.
He shook his head and tightened his grip. "Then I wouldn't get to be with you anymore. We can sit here for a while…if you don't want to sleep."
"No, this is good." I said and leaned my head back against the wall.