I flopped down in a chair exhausted. I had been running around all morning and decided I needed to take a minute for myself. I wrapped my fingers around my steaming cup of tea. My brain was a whirring mess of all the tasks I would have to do once I returned. I had eight active patients, seven of which were on the mend and one that was having a series of issues that didn't make sense. I had two of my team trying to figure it out. I'd have to check on them to see if there was any kind of breakthrough. I'd also have to check on the other seven to make sure they were still improving. I hoped there wouldn't be any surprises when I returned. The last month had been like this and it was wearing on me.

Susan had quit her job at the ministry. Ever since the takeover she felt unsafe and like she was being watched. Henry supported her decision to leave. I hadn't understood what Severus had meant when he said people were being sent to Azkaban for being muggle-born until Susan told me that they were creating a new department for Muggle-Born Registration. That was the last straw for her career at the Ministry of Magic.

I looked over at the cup of tea that I didn't even want and decided I should head back to work. I just had to get through several more hours and I could go home, head over to Susan's for dinner, and then tonight was a planned night with Severus. We decided that we would meet on Friday nights. If he needed to add a meeting or cancel a Friday meeting he would get a message to me. It was our first decision we agreed on together.

"Have you found anything that would explain all the symptoms?" I asked, entering the library.

Dierdre and my assistant, Felix, looked up at the sound of my voice. Both shook their heads.

"The bezoar took care of some of the symptoms," Felix said, "Which leads me to believe that we are dealing with multiple poisons."

"And no one poison is capable of all remaining symptoms?" I asked.

Felix shook his head. "I have found three poisons that would cause all remaining symptoms and are unaffected by bezoars. Two of them fit but the third one has symptoms that we aren't seeing that are kind of important in determining if it is that poison."

"How slow-acting are the two remaining poisons?"

He looked down at his notes and sighed. "Both are fast acting, so now we have no ideas."

"What if," I mused. "Multiple poisons isn't a cause but part of one of the symptoms?"

"What are you talking about?" he asked.

"Some symptoms went away with the bezoar. What if the reason for multiple poisons being in their system was from a symptom of the initial poisoning."Both Dierdre and Felix stared at me with blank looks. "Felix!" Felix jumped in alarm. "Of course! Felix Felicis when taken in large amounts can be toxic, causing recklessness and over-confidence. Maybe he took too much, got over-confident that he was infallible, and added with the reckless behaviour, took multiple poisons. Look up the other symptoms of an overdose of Felix Felicis and let me know if they fit. I'm going to go check on the other patients."

It didn't take Felix long to come to me with the news that the other symptoms could be explained by too much Felix Felicis. It was a relief since the bezoar counteracted the other poisons that could have actually harmed him, the only thing we had to do was protect the patient from himself until the potion wore off. It was unclear how long that would be since he wouldn't tell us how much he took. I tasked Dierdre with monitoring him while Felix and I finished checking on the other patients.

Dinners at Susan's were getting intricate since she stopped working. With nothing to fill her days and the kids home, she and Laura had started branching out into other cuisines. Tonight was Spanish night. Spanish tortilla, gazpacho, paella, and flan for dessert. The house smelled amazing, but there was so much food.

"I sliced the potatoes using a mandoline." Laura boasted putting the plate with the tortilla on the table.

"Where did you get a mandoline?" I asked. Susan's cheeks blushed red and avoided my eyes. "Keep it. Charlie was the fancy one in the kitchen, anyways."

"You never know, you two could fix the relationship." Susan suggested hopefully.

I thought of the way Severus' lips felt against mine a week ago. A strong rush of butterflies flooded my stomach. "I don't think so."

"Just apologise." She urged.

"Apologise?" I questioned. "For what?"

"I don't know." Susan groaned. "You don't tell me anything, but he was really in love with you so it has to be something you did."

"Wow!" Henry shouted in distraction. "Paella! Wonderful! How can anyone argue when there is paella around?"

Susan sighed. "Sorry. It's just that you were so happy with him. I don't want you to be one of those weird people that's alone your entire life. I thought you and Charlie had something."

"So did I." I admitted.

"Then what happened?"

"Something changed." I answered after careful consideration.

"Was it you or him?" She asked.

"Does it really matter?" Henry asked, dishing tortilla onto Sam's plate.

"I just think that Ruby has a tendency to self sabotage." Susan answered.

I opened my mouth to retort, but Henry beat me to it. "You're not her mother, Sue. She's your friend, she's an adult, and she's pretty damn smart. If she is deciding to not be with Charlie anymore then it's probably well thought out and there's a reason. She doesn't need to tell you what that reason is and I'm tired of you trying to play matchmaker. Let Ruby do what she wants. I love you, but stop."

Susan and I both stared at Henry as he returned his attention to the tortilla. I made a very dignified and grown-up gesture by sticking my tongue out at Susan. She responded with a tsk and an eyeroll.

"Vindication!" I added which was met with giggles from Laura and Sam. "Where's Thomas?"

Susan groaned. "Sulking in his room. We still haven't completely decided if they will go back to Hogwarts or not yet. He's going on a hunger strike in protest."

"Why don't you just let them go back to school." I suggested. "If you feel like things aren't right you can take them out. I'm sure they'll let you know if things are bad."

"What if something happens to them before they can let me know?" She asked. "I could never live with myself."

"Do you really think any of the professors are going to change or let anything truly bad happen to students just because of the presence of one perceived bad egg?" I asked.

"PERCEIVED!?" Susan shouted.

"Sorry." I said, trying to stop the coming explosion. "Just because there is one…monster, do you think that will make McGonagall, Flitwick, or Slughorn less protective of their students? I don't. If anything truly bad were to be a threat, those three would take it out, along with the other professors."

Susan silently considered what I was saying while nibbling a slice of potato. She sighed and put her fork down. "Thomas, darling, come downstairs."

The sound of a door opening was followed by a strong "No!" and then the sound of a door slamming.

"You'll probably want to come down, Thomas." Henry called out.

The door opening sounded again, this time followed with heavy, dramatic footsteps. Thomas appeared moments later, looking so much like his father I felt as though I were a student again. "What?" he whined.

Susan straightened herself up, ready to deliver big news. "I've decided that you and your siblings will be returning to Hogwarts this year."

Thomas' eyes lit up. "Really?"

"Yes," Susan said calmly. "On the condition that if anything even remotely dangerous happens you must alert me and your father." Thomas nodded his head enthusiastically. "REMOTELY DANGEROUS, maybe even mildly concerning. Anyways, are you going to sit down to dinner with us now?"

Thomas took his seat and took a serving of soup.

Dinner was finished and it was time for me to leave. I could have gone straight to my meeting with Severus, but part of me was convinced that Susan would know who I was aparating to if I did it from her house. I said my goodbyes and was gone to my flat.

My feet hit the floor of my kitchen. I was met with a gasp. "Jesus, I'll never be used to that."

I turned to find Charlie standing by the sink.

"Charlie!" I gasped. "What are you doing here?"

"I'm sorry I've been away so much." he said. "I've been busy, but I've missed you."

Oh no. "I thought you were avoiding me." I said, incredulous.

"Of course not," he assured. "I've just been busy, like I told you I was. Why would I avoid you?"

"I thought we were breaking up!" I half whined.

His eyes went wide and a startled look crossed his face. "Do…you…want to break up?"

"Kind of." I blurted immediately.

"Oh." Sadness took over his looks. "I see."

"I'm sorry, but I never see you anymore. I thought we were avoiding each other. I thought we were on the same page. You've been so odd lately. I thought we both felt the drifting apart."

"You've been avoiding me?" He asked, looking at me with puppy dog eyes.

I sighed. I was sounding like an absolute ass. "I wasn't, but then I thought you were so I started avoiding you back. But now, I guess you weren't avoiding me, so now I was just avoiding you and you were busy and I thought we were breaking up and you didn't have that intention at all and this is a mess now. I thought it was clean cut, but I guess not."

"And you want to break up?" he clarified.

I nodded slowly. "I…kissed Severus about a week ago. I love you Charlie, but I really love him. I've been denying it to myself, but it's become impossible to ignore. I'm sorry. This was so much okay-er when I thought we were already over."

Charlie nodded his head slowly. "I can't say I'm completely blind-sided. I thought something like this would happen. When Susan said he murdered someone and your initial reaction was to assume there was a reason for his actions…" he trailed of with a slight laugh. "It was ridiculous, you were trying to justify a man for killing another." There was a pause where he just stared at me, pain and pity in his eyes. "You're sure he's worth it? You're sure he's one of the good ones?"

"He questions his own worth, too." I whispered. "He's worth everything. And yes, he's definitely one of the good ones. He's good at hiding it, but I…sometimes I feel like I'm the only person in the world he lets see the real him. When we're together…I'm sorry. You don't want to hear this."

He shook his head. "No, I don't."

"I'm so sorry." I whispered.

"I should go," he said. "I'll…come back sometime when you're at work and collect my things. I'll slide the spare key under the door when I leave." His movements were jerky and awkward. He made his way to the door.

"Charlie." I said. He turned to face me. "If he didn't exist, I would have chosen you. You're an amazing guy."

A small smirk tugged at his mouth. "You're really bad at consoling speeches."

I laughed a little. "I'm sorry. It sounded better in my head."

Charlie placed his hand on the doorknob and turned back to me. "Call me if he turns out to be a complete asshole."

He opened the door and was gone. My heart pounded dramatically in my chest.

I stared at the door for a few moments after he left. I was surprisingly upset considering I had already thought the relationship was over. I replayed the conversation in my head and cringed at how crass I had been. Charlie was sweet, thoughtful, funny, and understanding. He deserved a better break-up than that. He deserves someone better than me.

I caught sight of my watch and started when I saw I was late for my meeting with Severus. I glanced at the door again, a pang of sadness stabbed in my stomach. I lifted my wand and headed to the Shrieking Shack.

My feet hit the floor. I was surprised to find the room lit by lamplight. Severus sat in the chair, his head resting on his fingertips. He jumped up at the sound of my arrival. I could see his body relax when he saw it was me. I wondered who he thought it might have been.

"I didn't think you were going to show up." he said, sitting back down.

"Sorry," I apologised. "I got caught up with something unexpected."

He nodded his head. "Decisions have been made," he muttered. "About the school."

"What kind of decisions?" I asked, taking a seat on the dust covered sofa.

"Alecto and Amycus Carrow will be teaching Muggle Studies and Defense Against the Dark Arts, though I think it will just be Dark Arts now." He said, rubbing his fingers over his lips in an anxious manner.

"Weren't you the Defense teacher now?" I asked. "What are they doing with you? Did You-Know-Who have you sacked? What are you going to do?"

He moved his hand from his mouth to the side of his jaw, shaking his head. "I haven't been sacked."

"Well then wha–?"

"I've been appointed Headmaster." he choked. "A giant slap in the face. Everyone thinks…knows that I murdered Dumbledore and now, it appears that I am taking his job. I feel sick, but what can I do? He considers this a gift for my hard work. To turn it down would…well, it would not fall in line with my role. I have to take it. I have to be thankful. I don't know what I'm going to do. The Carrows are…for lack of a better word, psychotic. Students and professors alike are going to be in danger and I'm meant to stand back and facilitate their reign of terror."

"But you won't, right?" I asked, my blood running through my veins like ice.

He shook his head and looked at me with his startling dark eyes. "I can't allow anyone to be hurt. I have to think of ways to save everyone without appearing to save anyone. There is going to be an uproar when the announcement is made in The Daily Prophet. Hopefully the news will make everyone reconsider sending their children to school."

"You want students to stay away?" I asked, my heart racing as I thought about Susan.

"Hogwarts is no longer safe." Severus whispered. "I'll try my best to keep injuries down and I'll do everything in my power to prevent fatalities, but I'll be watched by everyone. I'm not entirely sure he didn't place the Carrows specifically to spy on me and report back any sign of disloyalty. I have these fears that I'm already found out even though I know Vol–he trusts me completely." He was silent for a moment as he stared at nothing in particular and rubbed his jaw with the backs of his fingers. His eyes suddenly snapped to mine. My heart gave a surprised leap. "I'm so scared, Ruby."

I leapt from my seat and rushed over to him. I flung myself into his lap and pulled his head to my chest. His arms wrapped tightly around me and I felt sobs shake his body. I wanted to protect him, to save him, to take him away from all that he was expected to do, but I knew I couldn't. He would never abandon his quest. The shaking of his body stopped, but still he held onto me as though I was his only lifeline. He finally pulled his head from my chest, looking at my face.

"I'm sorry." he whispered.

"No," I whispered back, placing my hands on both of his cheeks and looking him in the eyes.

I became very aware how close we were, how he smelled of old books, how his hands felt on my hip, how I was sitting in his lap. I leaned in quickly and his lips met mine. His hands tightened on my body. Fireworks exploded in my brain and chest. My hands moved to the buttons of his robes. My fingers began working them loose. I wanted to make him feel something other than fear and worry. I wanted him to feel loved, safe, desired. I ran my fingers over the flesh of his exposed collar bone. I moved my lips to his neck, gently trailing kisses from his jaw to his throat. I adjusted my position to straddle him in the chair. The sounds of our breathing were amplified in the quiet space. My fingers continued working on his many buttons.

Suddenly his hands were on mine, pulling them away from his buttons. "No," he said breathlessly. "We can't."

"Why not?" I whispered the question into his neck as I continued kissing his soft skin.

He tangled his fingers in my hair and pulled my mouth hard to his. The ferocity with which he kissed me made me gasp in surprise. His gentleness was gone and a powerful control had taken over. A moan escaped from his lips, but the sound turned into a growl before he moved me carefully to the side. He was now standing, pacing the floor, running his fingers through his own hair in frustration.

"I have things I need to do." he said with a groan. "I have to concentrate on the task at hand. I can't allow myself to be distracted. You said you wanted me to have a friend. A friend I can deal with, especially if that friend will help me brainstorm what I should do. I've had Dumbledore calling the shots for so long and now everything is my responsibility. I can't get wrapped up in…you." He looked at me as I tried to catch my breath. His eyes scanned from my face and trailed down the length of my body. "As much as I would love to."

I remained in the chair breathing deeply. I felt slightly embarrassed by his rejection. He only wanted a friend to conspire with and I wanted to pick up where we left off. My heart pounded in my throat as I stared at him. "I'm sorry. I…" I struggled to finish the sentence. I stared at him, frozen in the middle of his pacing as he regarded me. Looking at him made me want to cry, I could feel the tears brimming. "I can be a friend." A tear slid down my cheek and I cursed its existence. I choked out a question as I fought back more. "What do we need to figure out?"

He backed up and sat on the sofa. Every cell in my brain screamed that I had ruined everything.

"How do I keep students safe?" he asked after a moment.

"What is the biggest threat you have to worry about?" I asked.

He was quiet for a moment. "Death Eaters, the Carrows."

"What can you do about those?" I asked.

He sprang up out of his seat. "I don't know! That's why I want help!"

The volume of his voice startled me. It had been a long time since he had yelled at me, since anyone had yelled at me.

"Don't shout at me or I'll stop coming here." I threatened. "I don't know what level of power you have. I'm not going to start listing off solutions when I don't know what you can reasonably do about anything. Send the Carrows to space and lock every Death Eater in a cage under the ocean. There! Were those suggestions helpful? OH, YOU CAN'T DO EITHER OF THOSE THINGS?"

Severus froze. His eyes observing me with surprise, his eyebrows raised. An amused grin slowly spread across his lips before a breathy laugh escaped them. "I'm sorry, I'm just…I'm sorry." He took a seat on the sofa again. "I'm the headmaster." he paused and furrowed his brow at his own words. "I have a lot of powers within the castle."

"And everything you do needs to be explainable for reasons other than you being a double agent?" I clarified.

He stared at me. "Obviously."

I shrugged. "Make sure other Death Eaters can't get in the school. Seal off passages in and out of the school. That would be easy enough to say it's to keep the students from running off."

He considered my words and slowly nodded his head. "I can make sure detentions don't get out of control. I can dictate what the students do and make it look dangerous when they are, in fact, perfectly safe."

"So no Cruorlappa berries then?" I asked, a smirk on my face.

"That is one of the stupidest things I have ever done." he said, hitting his forehead with his hand. "I didn't intend for you to be injured like that. I just wanted to teach you a lesson about being a know-it-all. Prove that you didn't, in fact, know it all. I was going to give you the antidote immediately, but then you started yelling at me. I forgot what I was meant to be doing. I almost lost you before I knew I liked you."

I remembered the argument he was referring to and smiled. "I really let you have it, didn't I?"

"You weren't having any of my nonsense." he laughed. "You were always very opinionated."

"You always knew what to say or do to set me off." I argued.

A smirk tugged at the corner of his mouth. He looked at me with a glimmer in his eyes. I could feel the heat of his stare and it made my cheeks blush. He blinked and shook his head. "We're off task. What else can I do?"

"Dumbledore really didn't give you any advice on any of this?" I asked.

"How could he have known any of this would happen?" Severus shrugged. "He was full of wisdom, but he wasn't a seer."

"This would be so much easier if he could just tell us what to do." I whined.

"Tell me, not us. You're not to be directly involved, remember?" he said, standing from the sofa. He looked at the opening to the tunnel leading to the Whomping Willow. "But maybe there is a way that I can get some advice from him."

"How?" I asked. "I won't allow you to dabble in necromancy."

He gave me a sideways glance. "Not even close to what I had in mind. Every former headmaster has a portrait of themselves. They pick up traits and the personality of their inspiration. Dumbledore's didn't have much time with his, but a partial Dumbledore is better than none, right?"

I shrugged. "I suppose."

His eyes flicked from me to the Whomping Willow passage and back. "I'll see you next week. I have something I want to try." He raced to the passage opening.

"Hey!" I yelled after him. He came to a stop and turned back to me. "You're just abandoning me?"

"I need to sneak into the school." he said, his black eyes searching my expression. "I said I'd see you next week."

"I'm coming with." I asserted.

"Absolutely not." he shook his head vigorously. "I'm not even supposed to be on the grounds yet and you certainly aren't."

"I don't care." I spat. "I'm coming."

His dark eyes held mine. Butterflies surged in my gut. Neither one of us was blinking. After a prolonged staring contest Severus let out an annoyed groan and pulled his gaze from mine. "This isn't one of those arguments I'm going to win, is it?"

I smiled in triumph. "No."

Severus lowered himself down into the tunnel. I followed. As I lowered myself down I felt strong hands on my waist. He guided me gently to the ground. We were pressed close together in the entrance, his hands still on my waist. I could feel a strong pull to him, like a rubber band was stretched as far as it would go around us. He lingered, holding on to my waist, his body pressed to mine. My heart began beating rapidly. Did he really just want a friend or was he still interested in more with me? I felt his hands leave my body. The butterflies dropped and I was left feeling hollow. I could hear his footsteps walking away down the tunnel. I scrambled to blindly catch up.

"Lumos." I whispered, the wandlight was almost blinding compared to the total darkness. Severus was several steps ahead of me and didn't seem to need the light as much as I did. I wondered if he had continued using this tunnel over the years.

We travelled in silence, the sound of shoes over rocks and dirt our only company. I wondered what his plan was. Would a portrait of Dumbledore really be able to offer usable advice?

We finally reached the end of the channel and emerged from the opening under the willow. We crawled out onto the school grounds and my head spun with a nostalgic wave at being back. Severus continued forward; a man on a mission. I didn't have time to stop and appreciate being back at this spot. I chased after him, part of me contemplated if I should turn around and apparate home. I wondered if he would notice if I did. I stopped walking and watched him continue on, his shadowy figure in the moonlight moving further away. His robes billowed in the gentle night breeze. I had decided to turn back when he reached a hand out behind him. His slender fingers pale in the moonlight waiting for me to hold on to them. When I didn't take his hand, he spun around and found that I was several feet behind. He tilted his head in an unspoken question that I didn't need elaborated; What are you doing?

I raced to meet him. He gently took my hand as soon as I was close enough and continued on. He pulled me past the double doors around the side of the castle. He was heading for an entrance we had used before that led down into the Potion's classroom.

We entered the dark classroom. The sour smell of potions hung in the air despite the room being in disuse.

"We have to be careful." Severus whispered. "No one is supposed to be here and Filch and Mrs. Norris are still around. If either of us gets caught we are both in trouble."

I nodded my head. He took my hand in his again and gave it a reassuring squeeze. I felt the urge to kiss him. He turned and pulled me to the door leading to the halls. I shook the thought from my head. He led me through the corridors, his hand squeezing mine. Suddenly, he stopped so abruptly that I crashed into him. He wrapped an arm quickly around my waist and pulled me into an inlet behind a tapestry. I felt his finger press gently on my lips in a quieting gesture. He was pressed against me in the small guarded space and I struggled to keep my imagination in check. The silence was so absolute that it was loud. My ears struggled to hear anything until they picked up a quiet meow close by.

I felt Severus' body tense against mine. I reached for his hand and squeezed it as my heart raced. I was sure the cat could hear it and would alert her master. Her meow came again, closer this time. I closed my eyes, as if the action turned Severus and I invisible.

A third meow sounded, further away this time. Severus gave my hand a quick squeeze and pulled me out from behind the tapestry back into the corridor. He made a quick glance around before pulling me at a run up a staircase. After some twists and turns we were standing in front of the statue that guarded the entrance to the Headmaster's Office.

He whispered something I couldn't make out and the statue jumped aside revealing the staircase. He turned around and upon seeing me a smirk tugged at his mouth. I cursed him for not knowing what his looks did to me. He led me up the stairs and into the office; his office.

"Albus." Severus whispered.

Moonlight trickled in through the windows, illuminating the room enough to make out features of the instruments, furniture, portraits on the wall. Severus made his way to the Headmaster's desk.

"Albus." he whispered again.

I could hear a yawn followed by the voice of the previous headmaster. "Severus?" It was odd hearing the voice of a person you knew to be dead. "What are you doing here?"

I could hear the stirrings of other portraits.

"I need advice." Severus whispered. "I'm worried about the safety of students. Two Death Eaters have been appointed as professors and I'm afraid I won't be able to protect the children from them. Not without giving my true intentions away."

"I see." the portrait of Albus Dumbledore mused. "These Death Eaters are particularly bad?"

"The Carrows." Severus responded.

"Ah," the portrait replied, "That does pose a problem."

"What do I do?"

The portrait was silent for a moment. "Is that Miss Winston?" My blood ran like ice when I heard my name.

"Yes." Severus said. "She…found me a few weeks ago after...well, after she heard that I murdered you. She wanted to know if it was true."

"I am sorry I asked you to separate yourself from Severus all those years ago." the portrait apologised. "Sometimes, even the best intentioned plans are the wrong ones."

"Can you help me figure out what to do with the Carrows?" Severus interrupted.

"Your hope is to protect the lives of the students?" Dumbledore asked.

"Of course."

"You might not like this plan, but it will protect them from mortal harm." Severus waited in silence for the portrait to continue. "Allow them to teach dark spells on the students."

"What?" Severus and I both spat at the same time.

"You can't be serious!" I shouted. "He can't allow the Carrows to use the students as guinea pigs to demonstrate dark magic."

"I agree with Ruby." Severus said. "I can't allow that to happen."

"I understand the concerns you both have, but if the Carrows don't have some sort of outlet they will become exceedingly violent." Dumbledore reasoned. "If you allow them to perform spells on the students it will appear that you are indifferent to the safety of the students, but you also need to make it clear that there will be serious consequences if any of them are severely injured."

Severus took my hand and led me from the office. We stopped just outside the door. He stood staring down the staircase in silence.

"What a deranged portrait." I whispered. "Apparently a partial Dumbledore isn't better than no Dumbledore. I suppose we have to brainstorm on our own."

Severus shook his head. "No, Ruby. He's right."