Pixie, Perv, Protector
By Mice
Part 6: Firecracker
—October 13th, Chelsea, NYC—
—Act I, The Floor Show—
"We have a problem."
"Already got the tickets, they are for sure not sold out."
"Not that."
"Do you want me to get you some stockings? Not too late. I'm sure they sell them as for a fee in line…"
"No."
"You'd rock some fishnets."
"Not the point."
"The entire point!"
"Jubilee…please listen."
"You have my ears, Drake'son."
Drake'son leaned into Jubilee's ear, a hard feat near the entrance in line to Cinepolis at almost midnight. "I heard someone talking about virgins."
"You are no virgin."
"We did not have this movie in my dimension."
"Yeah, but you've totally had to seen it while you've been here."
"We never made it that far in my education."
"Impossible!" Jubilee began to laugh before Drake'son stared at her with his one good eye, filled with unusual terror. "Oh shit. This is your first time!"
Drake'son grabbed her wrist, tightly with fear. "What am I going to have to do up there?"
"Uhm…probably have stuff written on your face, go up in front of everybody and do something embarrassing. One time, it was a spanking, another was glitter enemas —"
"I am not getting an enema on stage. I am not going on that stage. How do I avoid virgin detection?"
Jubilee stared at her friend with long blond hair and eye patch, dressed in leather and denim, who had the ability to kill with his mind (or at least look it). "You know that they don't have those in this dimension, right?" She waited for a moment as she could tell that he did not. And looking at the line filled with first timers begging to be humiliated and the shadow cast of this theater's Rocky Horror Picture show shouting about using "virgin detectors" in their costumes, she understood.
"Can you just tell them that I'm from an alternate dimension and that any attempt to engage might induce an instance of PTSD?" Drake'son pointed to the couple of cast members dressed in metallic tiny togas at the couple in front of them, unable to enter the theater unless passing the test.
"VIRGIN DETECTORS!" they said in unison, circling the couple, one with a trident tipped with plastic penises. The other with a wand and a meter which moved as the wand was moved around one part of the couple.
"First time? The virgin detector will know for sure!"
"I'm getting a positive read! SLUT, SLUT, SLUT! YOU'RE A SLUT!" they called, pointing to the male part of the couple. Soon, a group of cast members circled them, chanting.
"SLUT, SLUT, SLUT! YOU'RE A SLUT!"
His face was painted with lipstick, shirt removed, and "SLUT!" painted across his chest.
They got their tickets and entered the theater.
The Virgin Detectors moved their way to Jubilee and Drake'son.
Right as their mouth opened but before dick tipped tridents could be pointed and positioned, Jubilee waved her hand, motioning them to go to the couple behind them.
They got their tickets and entered.
"That…" Drake'son smiled. "Was cool."
Jubilee grabbed his hand and led him to the snack bar, lips together. She had not dressed up for the show, wearing an open violet trench coat, black pants with suspenders and a white button down shirt with 80's geometric shapes in black. Paired with black Oxfords and polka dot scarf. No one on any of the teams she had been on ever called her cool.
Not only did he say it, but Drake'son definitely made her feel it.
Which is probably why the moment they got to the snack counter, Jubilee promptly said, "No Jordan almonds, no deal."
—Act II, Joy—
They got them for free and they were almost out.
"Look, Drake, I got one left. It's yours." She tapped him with the box. He made no move. Jubilee went for the abandoned almond. "Suit yourself." She toyed with the almond for a few movements, noticing that he still didn't move.
Jubilee looked at the screen. "I don't get it. You know Tim Curry."
He shook his head short and soft and spoke honestly. "I was just gay. It was good."
Jubilee nodded. She moved the box to him - no way he had heard her earlier.
"Last one?"
"Yep."
"It's yours."
"Nope."
"I have one chambered." Drake'son opened his eye patch and caught a mint green Jordan almond fall.
"…you're eating that?"
"Yep. "
"Doesn't it have gross eye-injury-related goo and crusts on it?"
Drake'son motioned to her to come closer to her eye. He opened his eye patch to reveal a healthy bright blue eye.
He closed it. "Just in case the other eye gets damaged. That's a secret."
"Oh." Jubilee pulled out two Jordan almonds out of the box. "So I wouldn't have to actually let you have the last one.
Drake'son took it. Then gave her the one from his eye.
"Have two."
She was pretty sure he was winking, but couldn't tell because of the eye patch.
—Act III, It Is to Win—
Jubilee waited at the front. "Ready?"
"Let's go." Drake'son walked with Jubilee through late night, early morning Chelsea.
They were both quiet.
Jubilee knew why she was quiet. She couldn't remember if she had the key card. She remembered taking it with her before she left the hotel. They had gotten there early in to NYC just long enough to get the keys and go out. And she had forgotten where she had put the key card because of seeing an older woman accessorizing her leopard cape with a small spider monkey on her shoulder with a matching cape.
The monkey had given her the finger.
Jubilee was sure that it could have dropped out while she was giving it right back.
She was lost in angry thought about the monkey when Drake'son handed her something.
"Here."
"What's this?"
"It's you."
"Where did you get this?"
"That one scene at the pool, they throw cards. They all landed on us."
"They warned us about sitting so far back."
"And you chased them away with a look."
Jubilee looked at the playing card. It was the queen of hearts.
"This for me?"
He shook his head. "It's."
—Act V, Home—
The subway was crowded and they stood close in the subway. It was also noisy with a banjo player that only played Rihanna songs.
"So, do you just want to kiss and get it over with?"
"What?"
"Like, I just stick my tongue down your throat and then we don't have to worry about whether or not this is a date? We can just make it a date and then it can either be a good date or bad date, and it couldn't just be an awkward meeting that shouldn't be awkward." Jubilee was sure she had just made this the last time she'd see Drake'son.
"I don't think that's a good idea."
"Why? Is it the banjo? I like banjos."
"Everybody loves banjo."
"Rihanna."
"I love banjo and Rihanna."
"Then why?"
"Almost anything for banjo; anything for Rihanna."
And now Jubilee knew for sure - not a date. Just keep it cool and be friends. It was a clear sign.
—End of Show, Love on the Brain—
Jubilee held the card and confessed. "I lost my keycard."
He withdrew another card. "I have our card. I wouldn't trust you in this town to have the only card to our room. There are monkeys being used as accessories with accessories here."
It was a clear sign.
Drake'son began looking for a cab and humming Rihanna.