Chapter 25

Chloe's POV

When I open my eyes, the first thing I see is my mother. It takes me a second to realize I'm not dreaming. I really am home.

"Mommy." Springing forward, I throw my good arm around my mom's neck, holding on tight. Tears stream down both of our faces as we hold onto each other.

"You're home now. You're safe," she whispers sounding like she's reassuring herself more than me.

"I'm so sorry," I manage to choke out past my tears. My mom just shakes her head.

"I understand why you did it, baby. It's okay, just never do it again."

Laughing sadly, I pull back. "Never, I promise."

I finally look around, noticing we're not alone. It seems like everyone in Barden is here. All of mine and Beca's friends are here. There's two men I don't recognize, but I can tell one is a doctor.

"Chloe," the doctor steps forward. "I'm the pack doctor and a friend of Eli's. You can call me Doc if you like. Everybody else does. I need to look you over and make sure everything is okay. Sound good?" I nod.

"It's mainly just my left arm," I tell him, wanting to get this over with. He makes a 'hmm' sound and crouches down next to me. For the next several minutes, he makes me a sling and checks over everything else.

"Your ribs are bruised but there's not much we can do for that. Just some ice and rest. I'm pretty sure your arm is fractured. I highly recommend coming to my office to get some X-rays just to make sure. You have a minor concussion so just come to me if you have any worrisome symptoms."

"Can I get your office number?" My mom asks, walking off with the doctor. Once they leave, the other unfamiliar man comes over and crouches down next to me. He has light, gray hair and brown eyes. He looks to be in his 40s but is very attractive.

"I'm Eli Swanson, Jesse's dad."

"Hi," my voice comes out small, as I study his kind, soft eyes. How did Beca ever think this man wouldn't take her in? He looks like someone would do that. Looks can be deceiving though.

"Where's Beca?"

"That's actually what I wanted to talk about." He sighs. "Beca is not the same as Emily must've told you, but I thought it would be better if I explained."

"Explained what? And why isn't she here?"

"Beca seems to be stuck. When you left she couldn't take it and the insanity started to take over her. The thing is though….she seems to have let it." I frown, not sure what he means.

"What are you talking about?"

"She's like a whole new person. I've never seen anything like it. Most wolves go crazy and get depressed when they lose their mate, but Beca seems to seek some kind of thrill from danger. She's going wild and I don't think anybody can get her back."

"What about me? I'm her mate."

"Well yes," Mr. Swanson contemplates for a second. "That's not always the case though. If a wolf is too far gone, nobody can get them back. At first I thought maybe you could but Beca seems to enjoy it. I'm afraid that no one can get her back and even if you could rein her in, she'll never be the same." I stare at Mr. Swanson, taking in everything he said. If it's true, than what does that mean for me? Where does that leave me? Alone and confused but I can't just let that be my future. Yes, I ran away, but I can't let one horrible mistake decide my fate.

"I'll have to try to get her back."

"But Chloe-"

"There's no butts Mr. Swanson. I have to do everything I can to help her. To get her back, at least partly, to who she used to be."

"Yes, but that's not all." I freeze. "She doesn't just act different. She looks different too." He did say something about her being stuck. Is this what he meant?

"Tell me."

"She kept shifting back and forth, sometimes staying in her wolf form for days to a week at a time. Finally, her body seems to have had enough and now she's stuck, partly shifted."

"Is that even possible?" I can't remember her ever saying anything about that.

"No, at least I thought so until she did it. She has claws, fur and teeth like a wolf, but she stands on two legs and can talk. Not very well at first but she got used to it. Her eyes are silver like her wolf's, very beautiful but it also contains that same wild spark." Silver eyes flash through my mind, reminding me of my dream and what actually happened in the cell. What happened to Luke.

"She killed Luke, didn't she?" Mr. Swanson nods solemnly.

"Yes, and it seems like she doesn't care. She told me that he deserved it." Well, he kind of did. I think hard though, trying to remember everything. It was so dark but I could've sworn I saw her figure lean down and close his eyes. You don't do that if you don't care. It's a sign of respect and guilt.

"She did though. I know it."

"I'm glad that you believe that. She needs somebody on her side because I can assure you, not many people here will." I look to where he points. My sister is over in the corner, arguing with Carter. She spots me watching her and walks over.

"Hey sis," she smiles, but it's forced. Mr. Swanson gets up and goes out to where my mother walked with the doctor.

"Hey. Look, I heard that you guys dropped out of school and just wanted to say I'm sorry. You guys shouldn't have done that, not for me."

"That's our job, carrot stick," Carter places a hand on my shoulder. "We're going back next semester anyway, so it's all good."

"Okay. I'm still sorry though."

"And we forgive you even though we may not understand why you did it." Callie's forced smile drops into something more serious. "Why did you do it? Why'd you risk it all for her?"

I don't hesitate to answer. "I love her."

"Oh, carrot stick. How is it that you seem so much older than us?"

"Because you never grew up," I joke and Carter places a hand on his chest in mock hurt.

"Ouch sis. Right in the heart."

"I still don't quite understand, but I'll try," Callie compromises. I place a hand over my sister's.

"You will once you fall in love." She just shakes her head a little and stands up.

"Better let you get some sleep. You'll need it for when Beca comes back." Callie walks away without another word, Carter right behind her.

"How good is it to be back?" Aubrey sits on the edge of the couch near my feet. She grabs a hold of my hand.

"Pretty damn good." We both laugh and just watch everybody interact. People I never would've thought would get along are laughing and having a good time. I guess miracles really do happen.

"So I hear you and Stacie are a thing now," I wiggle my eyebrows making her laugh.

"Yeah, about a month after you left I decided that if I ever wanted anything to happen, I had to act now. So I did. Just went up, told her how I felt, and before she could say anything, I kissed her."

"It wasn't really fair if you think about it," Stacie comments coming over, bending down and kissing Aubrey on the cheek.

"Why do you say that?" Aubrey looks up at her incredulously.

"Well, before I had time to think, you used your power of physical attraction on me. I had no choice but to say yes to dating you after that." Stacie teases and Aubrey's eyes just widen.

"You mean, that actually worked?" We all laugh but mine is cut off by a big yawn.

"Guess it's time for you to get to bed," my mom says, coming in with Mr. Swanson.

"Do I have too?" They both laugh but don't answer. Mr. Swanson just picks me up and starts to go upstairs.

"I can walk, you know."

"Yes, but you shouldn't. Now, stop squirming. I don't want to drop you. Laura will kill me."

"I will not," my mom playfully slaps his arm.

"Sure. Next thing you know I'll be six foot under and not sure how the hell I ended up there. Women say one thing but do something completely different. It's all so confusing."

"What is?" I ask and he grins.

"Women."

We get to my room and Mr. Swanson lays me down before leaving the room. My mom kisses my forehead and then turns the light off, leaving me alone with my nightmares. My pillows smell like Beca which tells me that she slept here, presumably while I was gone. Finally having a moment alone gives me a chance to grieve how much I missed and how I put my friends and families lives on hold. When I left, I didn't stop to think about the consequences it would cause here, just what it would do to me if I let Beca go instead.

I'm almost asleep, my eyes fluttering as I attempt to keep them open, when the door to my room opens. The light blinds me and I cover my eyes with my arm until the door is shut. The familiar pull tugs at my heart and I smile.

"Beca," I whisper and there's movement in the corner. I can see her outline, but in the dark, it's impossible to see her face. I go to turn the lamp on when she speaks.

"Don't." Her voice is weird, muffled like she has a mouthful of cotton.

"Why not? I want to see you." The bed sinks as she sits on the edge and I sit up.

"You don't want to see me like this."

"Um, I don't remember saying that. If I want to see you, then I'm going to see you. It's inevitable." A low laugh comes from her, not sounding very human like.

"Just be prepared. I don't want to scare you."

"You couldn't scare me Becs." I smile at her, hoping she can see me. My heart pounds as I lean over and switch on the light. It takes me a second to focus but when I do, I can't help but jump. Beca is…. I'm not sure what she is.

Her long dark hair flows down her back like usual, but it's unruly, like it hasn't been brushed in a while and the tip of her ears poke out. She has her head bent down with her hands, or what I think are hands anyway, folded together. Leaning forward, I lift up her chin and make her face me. With a slightly shaky hand, I brush her hair behind her ear, getting a better look at her face. There's light gray fur covering her skin, beautiful and seeming to shimmer in the soft light. Her mouth protrudes a little and I can see the tips of her teeth poking out a little, like they're fighting to get out. What catches my attention though is her eyes. They're a bright silver, sticking out from everything else.

"I know I'm ugly," Beca whispers and I detect tears in her voice. I stroke her cheek and she looks at me, seeming surprised.

"The word that came to mind is gorgeous."

"But," Beca jumps up, "look at my hands. I can barely even open doors now and my feet." She points down and I follow her gaze. Her feet are arched weirdly and her toenails are claws now, just like with her hand. I look back up at Beca as she watches me like she expects me to run out of the room screaming monster. Grinning, I stand up and walk over to her, careful of my injuries.

"So?"

"So what?" I ask not sure what she's getting at here. Beca frowns, like she's confused.

"Aren't you going to say something?"

"Like what?"

"Like how hideous I am. How you reject me now," Beca's voice has a deep sadness that pains me. She really thinks that's how I will react and how I see her.

"Beca, if you want me to say that, I'm sorry but I can't. You know why?" She shakes her head. "Because I don't see any of that. I see beauty, grace and I'll tell you what. I thought you were easy on the eyes before but now…."

Beca stares at me for a second before throwing her head back, laughing, a more human sound now. The sound melts my heart, almost making me drop to my knees. When she winds down, we stand there, just a few inches apart and not sure what to do now. I mean, I know what I want to do, but I'm not sure where we stand. Is she mad that I left? That I may have caused her to go insane? Everybody was saying how crazy and different she became, but I don't see it. All I see is a girl who got left behind by her mate and had to adapt.

"I'm sorry," I whisper, tears flowing down my face. Beca reaches toward me, as though to go and wipe the tears away but stops, curling her hand into a fist. I grab her hand and spread it out before placing it on my cheek for her. The soft fur brushes my face, making me shudder. She keeps her claws pointed away from my face, careful not to cut me.

"Sorry for what?"

"Sorry that I left. That I ruined everything."

"Is that what you think?" I nod. "Chlo, everybody makes choices, it's just a matter of why. You chose to take my place, to save me and I'm so grateful for that. I will never hold that against you for doing something that I was just about to go and do."

"But everybody stopped what they were doing and just to help me. My siblings left college for Christ's sake."

"Yeah, but like I said. Everybody makes choices. All those people downstairs, they chose to stick around. They chose to fight for you and I bet that they would do it all over again in a heartbeat." I smile through my tears and lean into Beca's hand.

"I guess some good came out of it, huh?" Beca nods, agreeing with me. "So, do you think what I did was brave?"

"Of course," Beca's voice is puzzled, not sure where I'm headed.

"Okay, so I should get a reward for that, right?"

"Anything you want." I grin mischievously.

"Anything?" Beca nods again. "Well, I want a kiss."

"Are you sure?" Beca's voice is shaky and I know that she's thinking about her appearance. "I mean, it's not the same. I'm not the same."

"No, but neither am I."

"Well, yeah, but I'm like physically different. With my teeth and all." I put a hand on my hip, wishing that I had my other hand free so I would look more intimidating.

"Beca Mitchell, are you denying me the reward I so rightfully deserve? If so, I'll call the council and they won't be happy with you."

"The council? And who resides on this council?"

"Um, everybody downstairs. Including my sister." Beca makes a face in mock horror.

"I guess I better deliver then." She leans forward, placing her hands on my cheeks. I can feel her nervousness and place a hand over hers, hoping to calm her down. She gives me a thankful smile and leans forward, connecting our lips at last. It's definitely different, but not a bad different. I thought her protruding mouth would make it awkward, but not at all. It's like this was how it was meant to be. Like nothing ever changed.

Moaning, I lean into her and all too quickly, she pulls away. She sets her forehead on mine, catching her breath. The whole time, I pout, hating that it's over. Beca laughs, noticing my pity party and leads me to the bed.

"Chlo, you need some rest but I promise, we'll continue this very soon. We have a big day tomorrow."

"Yeah? What's going on?"

"Well, you're back and everybody is going to want to talk to you. Plus, your grandma is coming."

"Grandma Joyce is coming? Why?" Beca shrugs.

"Something about meeting your siblings and checking on you." I lay down on the bed, scooting over so Beca will have room. She moves back and forth on her feet, hesitating.

"Beca, we've done this like a million times."

"Yeah, but not while I was like this. I don't want to hurt you."

"Trust me," I laugh. "You won't hurt me. The wolf in you wouldn't let that happen and look at that, you're already halfway there." Beca chuckles and slides in next to me. She lays stiff though, her arms straight at her sides.

"Really? Come on." Beca hesitates for another moment before finally relaxing and putting an arm around me, careful of my injured one. "Sorry but I need some Beca cuddles." I lay my head on her chest, my sling resting on her stomach.

"Beca cuddles?"

"Yeah, I missed cuddling with you. It's been so long since I've slept on anything but cold, concrete floor." Beca remains silent but that's okay because my eyes are already closing, my mind shutting of for the night.

"I love you," I whisper without thinking. I'm not sure if I dream it but I'm pretty sure I hear Beca say it back.