I'm frightened by what I see
But somehow I know
That there's much more to come
Immobilized by my fear
And soon to be
Blinded by tears
I can stop the pain
If I will it all away

"Whisper"
Evanescence

Bonus Prompt:

Endurance

She had long since felt pain. She had faced it since a very young age. She was always willing it away for the people she cared about. The first blow had come when she had lost her mother. She was told to be strong. The world didn't stop and her father did not need to be constantly of reminded her mother by looking at her. She had soon lost her father after that when he declared her hopeless and she silently willed away her pain, for the sake of her father.

When kids bullied her because of her white eyes, she was taught to bear it by keeping a smile on her face and appear as if it did not much affect her. The pain could be physical or emotional. Naruto taught her to rise up strong and fight back. She had willed away the pain, for Naruto.

Right now, she was training with her sister, and her sister showed her no mercy. Each blow hurled at her seemed to radiate with the intention of inflicting pain upon the older sister who had once again risen up from the ashes even after she was declared hopeless by their father. Hinata knew that Hanabi loved her even though they had never actually been close. But as they fought, Hanabi's eyes shone and Hinata couldn't be sure if it was with malice or a burning will to succeed.

Having Hanabi look at her like that, she felt that she had lost a sister as well. The pain she suffered felt more than the slight brushes which burned her nerves her younger sister managed to touch through her guard. She supposed that was called for. Hanabi needed to vent out her aggression and Hinata silently willed her pain away, for the sake of her sister.

Born a Hyūga, it had become a reflex living with her inbound relatives to endure pain. Her heart had become like rubber and not even a blade or a jūken could penetrate it.

But later when they were in bed together, Neji's words proved to be sharper than a sword and it caught her completely by surprise. Never could she have expected that anyone could breach the walls she had long since built so carefully surrounding her heart, and that too by a simple honorific. She had willed away the pain when they had fought as cousins and they were pitted together to battle, but she could not will away the pain for Neji as her husband, a pain she felt as his wife.

It had started when Hinata slowly started to unbutton her blouse to ready herself for him and he had stopped her midway as he touched her.

"You're cold, Hinata-sama," he said simply as he wrapped her hands in his. Her body was not receptive to him tonight as she was still thinking about possibly losing her sister and neither did it make a difference that he looked at her with almost a sympathising expression on his face.

She flinched. He had not stopped calling her "Hinata-sama" on purpose, to rub it in her face that the relationship they had meant that he was always forced to obey her. That's what she felt and it was very possibly true. He had done nothing to hide the fact that he lived to obey and serve, and that's what their marital relationship entailed as he had not married her because his heart had desired it so. He did nothing out of his own free will. He took her to bed because it was his duty to provide an heir soon, not because he wanted to be with her.

She thought that by allowing himself to be with her, he might start to feel differently. But that had not happened. He still acted like he was forced to pleasure her. His body was stiff and he did not speak a word. Only the sounds he made betrayed any emotion at all or hint at his position.

Why did he even resent her? When would he learn that her life was played with just as well, far more so than his own?

"Because you're not Naruto, nii-san," she said softly, attempting to hurt him just like he had hurt her.

He nods simply, accepting. Hinata looked at him, trying to hide the hurt on her face as she once more tried to will away the pain she felt.

Wasn't he even going to argue back? Did he not feel a single ounce of possessiveness for her? Did he not long for her? Did he not care that she engaged in a relationship with her lover?

Will she always be just his Hinata-sama?

She wanted to slap him. She wanted to push him away and pull her hands away from his grasp.

"You on the other hand are as hot as the place you spawn from," she carried on in the same even tone.

He looked down at their interlocked hands, still not commenting. When he looked back up, unspoken words were etched on his face but his lips remained stubbornly sealed. He continued to look at her as if he was observing a famous piece of art not for the first time. His eyes roamed over her curves he was steadily growing familiar with before lingering on her lips.

"Yes," he said softly as he brushed a nonexistent strand of hair away from her face and tilted her chin up. They looked at each have other like that for a while and Hinata burnt in silence.

"You can transform into him," she suggested, a blush rising up her rosy cheeks. "I… I can imagine making love to… Him."

He appeared thoughtful and she waited anxiously for his answer. It was a test, she told herself. She was testing him. Did he just look for pleasure, or did he truly want her for himself?

She had felt him bury his resentment for her. She had caught him observing her when he thought she wasn't looking. She had felt his lingering eyes on her back as she moved around the house.

But he did not make a move nor make a show of affection. When she looked back at him, he pointedly looked away or lowered his gaze.

"I suppose it cannot be helped," he agreed as he readied a transformation seal. With a loud "poof", he transformed into a goofy blonde who looked at her cheekily with his trademark grin stretched across his face.

"Hinata-sama," he spoke in Naruto's voice.

The pain which Hinata felt at that moment was beyond her endurance. The pain she felt at that moment was not one she could've willed away even if she had attempted to.

And while making love to Neji as Naruto was definitely not the same, it did definitely came close to making her body receptive. Tonight, she screamed out her lover's name and not that of her husband as she climaxed with him.