A/n: A new chapter has come. I really like Luna's quirks and all the imaginary things she uses to explain life so I'm kind of putting them here, there and everywhere; they are mostly made up of me hitting keys at random and adding vowels to help make it legible, most don't have any significant meaning until I get desperate later.
Standard disclaimers apply.
"Is that what you're wearing on your big date?" Ron slipped into the seat beside Kurt and grabbed a slice of toast from the boy's plate, "I like it, wouldn't want to send the wrong message."
Kurt looked down at the oversized multi-coloured sweater his grandmother had gifted him Christmas before last, "I'm not wearing this but what kind of message do my normal clothes send? How is this wrong?"
"No, you miss heard me," Ron didn't look at Kurt as he spoke because he was too busy getting started on the bacon sandwich assembly line, "there's nothing wrong with that."
"So there's something wrong with the rest of my clothes?" Kurt's eyebrows were probably embedded in his hair at this point and his voice was equally high.
"Nothing's wrong with your clothes," Ron laid a greasy hand of comfort on Kurt's, "they're just very… grown up and they got you accosted in a pub once."
"That was one time," Kurt protested.
"How often do you go to pubs?" Ron did something that Kurt never expected, he tilted his head expectantly as Kurt often did.
"Just that once," Kurt smiled nervously.
"I'm not saying there's anything wrong with your clothes," Ron shrugged, "just reminding you that the world doesn't always see things the same way."
Kurt wanted to smile but that would mean admitting that Ron was being wise, "your wording was sloppy at best. I will wear whatever I like and nobody is going to stop me."
"If I don't approve I might tell McGonagall, then she can stop," Ron shrugged.
"What's he telling McGonagall?" Hermione slipped into the seat beside the pair.
"Ron thinks some of outfits are too grown up," Kurt said to Hermione before turning to Ron, "You sound like my dad and Carole."
"That's absurd Ron," Hermione shook her head, "Kurt dresses like my grandmother does, if her clothes all shrank in the wash."
"The one that sounds like Hagrid?" Kurt's eyebrows were back in the vicinity of his hairline.
"No, the other one," Hermione laid an assuring hand on his should, "you'd approve. Speaking of Hagrid, we should go see how he's doing, maybe in the afternoon?"
"We could go see him this afternoon when we get back from Hogsmead or tomorrow before the rugby," Kurt clapped excitedly having let the idea of playing wash over him and finally settled on a worst case scenario he could easily wrap his head around.
"Harry and I'll go during the day," Ron waved them off, "we'll tell him you meant to come."
"During the day?" Hermione gawked at the red haired boy, "Are you not coming into town."
Ron shrugged and tried to exude an air of indifference but it failed and came across forced, "we don't feel up to it." Kurt and Hermione each gave the boy an intense stare and slowly he crumbled, "Harry didn't get his indemnity form signed and I was going to stay with him under the guise of trying to save my money, you know how he is."
"So if we stayed as well he'd get all sullen and moody," Hermione rolled her eyes, "that would defeat the purpose."
"Why didn't he send it back to his aunt?" Kurt was slightly peeved by the apathy with which this situation was being dealt, "I thought she was on drugs and being fake nice to him."
"That would mean swallowing his pride," Hermione pointed out, "but we're also not in a position to pass judgement, we don't know their story."
"And I have the feeling we'll probably never know," Ron sighed.
"What will you never know?" Harry asked with false pep as he sat opposite the three of them.
"What the history between Lupin and Snape is," Kurt quickly said, "I was telling Ron and Hermione that Professor Lupin takes all of Professor Snape's detentions."
"And I remember them whispering to each other just before our practical lesson on Boggarts," Hermione added, Kurt thought he had been the only one to notice that.
"And then they ignore each other in public," Ron seemed to be mulling this information over in his mind, "almost as if their keeping a secret."
"Do you think their…" Hermione made a rude gesture, "you know."
Kurt laughed at his friends prudish nature, "fornicating? I think Professor Lupin is a little out of Professor Snape's league."
"Hence the secrecy," Hermione pointed it out like it was so obvious, "Snape is his dirty little secret."
Kurt rolled his eyes with a giggle, "The day Professor Snape can pull a sexy beast like that is the day I go out with Goyle."
"Ice cold," Harry smiled.
"Fred and George said I was colder than dry ice," Kurt smiled.
Harry's eyes flicked from Hermione to Kurt and back again, "You two are killing that minimalistic look."
"Everyone's a critic," Kurt groaned, "After I help Hermione with her hair I will change into something that has all the bells and whistles you've come to expect from me."
"I feel like this is how I always dress," Hermione furrowed her brow, "I was actually going to wear this, this is my favourite dress."
Kurt eyed the grey tunic, "it's a step up from the yellow gymslip you wore to Language."
"Wear one of the things we bought in London," Harry suggested, "They all have the Kurt stamp of approval."
"I feel like Anthony knew what I looked like when he agreed to go on a date with me," Hermione protested with an angry huff, "I don't think it's necessary for me to change the way I look."
"Nobody's changing the way you look," Kurt spoke calmly and soothingly, "I tried that last year and it didn't work out, you picked those clothes so you must have liked them."
"All we're saying is that you shouldn't dress like we're staying in to watch the telly," Harry tried to soothe her, he looked wrecked with guilt for having broached the subject.
"Does this mean you're not going to braid my hair?" Hermione let out an exhausted grunt, "because I'd hate to have to brush it."
"That's why I'm dressed like this," Kurt smiled sweetly at her.
Ron stopped for a moment and raised a brow in Kurt's direction, "you wore different clothes just to do Hermione's hair?"
"This Gryffindor's mane sheds everywhere," Kurt made a dramatic hand gesture that mimicked the size of Hermione's dome of curls as he spoke.
"My hair doesn't shed that much and I doubt it's that highly domed," Hermione gave him a playful nudge on the shoulder.
"Of course it is," Ron leaned forward to tease her, "why else do you think Kurt started The Power for Hair Straighteners petition?"
"We have six signatures now," Kurt nodded triumphantly, "I'm waiting for the three of you to sign it as well before I can take it to the public."
"I'm against hair straighteners," Harry shook his head, "I think they are an abomination against nature."
"I don't know enough to make an informed decision," Hermione waved her hands, "a lot of the facts right now are falling very far on both sides of the fence and I still need to consult my spiritual advisor."
"I'm your spiritual advisor," Kurt rolled his eyes before turning to Ron, "what's your excuse?"
"I'm apolitical," Ron spoke around a mouthful of bacon sandwich.
"Sometimes I think you guys want my curls to show themselves," Kurt shook his head in defeat, "it's not a good look on me, I look nothing like Mark Ruffalo!"
On the other side of school at the exact same time:
"You need to stop," Kurt's voice was clinical, he didn't want to appear at all fickle, "if you don't stop we'll have a problem."
"I don't know what you mean."
"I don't know what I mean either but soon enough I will and it will probably piss me off."
"How do you know you're going to know something soon?"
"Something's off about me," Kurt admitted, "I've never forgotten anything almost all my life, it just takes me a moment to sort through the memories but suddenly I'm drawing blanks."
"You should see a doctor."
Kurt wanted to laugh but didn't, "this isn't medical, I'm the kind of person who goes to see the doctor before the symptoms start to manifest themselves, this means someone is interfering with me."
"If somebody is interfering with you then why would you come to me?"
"Because you're the only person with the balls to do it."
"I highly doubt that."
"You're not going to stop, are you?"
"I don't know what you're talking about."
"Look, I'm going to do you a favour."
"You're really talking to the wrong person."
"My mind is a very complex filing system with a rather impressive search algorithm," Kurt smirked, "one thing that never happens is that I never fail to produce results on something that I even consider worth searching for."
"I don't understand what you're implying."
"If you're going to try and bury something that I know then you have to plant an oak tree over the grave because blanks make me suspicious," Kurt squared up, "I'm not above exhuming that skeleton."
"What if it's not what you think it is?"
"That's a risk I'm willing to take."
"What if it's bigger that you think it is? What if it's for the greater good?"
Kurt's composure was shredded when those final words hit his ears and he started shouting angrily, "When it comes to my mind there is no greater good than me! In there, there is nothing bigger than me"
~0~
Kurt and Hermione stared each other down in the entrance hall, one of them would have to break eventually and Kurt knew that it couldn't be him.
"You should go change," Kurt eventually said, he had broken but he remained obstinate on the matter.
"Not a chance in hell," Hermione scoffed, Kurt couldn't read her and it was making him angry.
"I wear it better," Kurt twirled and showcased how well he wore the blouse but he knew Hermione looked just as good in it.
"I saw it first," Hermione countered angrily.
"I bought it first," Kurt spoke between gritted teeth, "if memory serves you called fugly until I tried it on."
"It's a woman's blouse," Hermione chortled.
"Never stopped me before," Kurt ridiculed, he grabbed Finn by the arm as he tried to walk by without being pulled into the argument, "Who's wearing it better?"
"Ooh, is this the vintage Chanel?" Finn avoided answering the question by showering them in compliments, "Cute."
"We're not falling for that this early in the morning," Hermione shook her head dismissively, "You have to answer and answer honestly."
The boy cleared his throat nervously, "you're both making it work in such different ways; Kurt has that whole sophisticated, office whore vibe going so well."
"Oh my gosh," Kurt squealed excitedly, "That's just the look I was going for."
"Hermione on the other hand has the slutty Margaret Thatcher thing in the bag," Finn seemed to give their conundrum a moment's thought, "Are you going on a date with the same boy?"
"We're weird but I don't think it's come to that yet," Hermione and Kurt laughed at the idea.
"Then it doesn't matter who wears it better," Finn shrugged, "Neither of you should have to change because each of your dates should only have eyes for you two, beauties nobody can compete with."
"Have I ever told you what a sexy beast you are when you solve my fashion conundrums," Kurt pulled at Finn's cheek playfully.
Hermione mirrored his actions, "more so when you're calling us beautiful."
"What can I say?" Finn shrugged with an arrogant smirk, "When you got it, you got it. Also though, it's not even the same colour."
"Are you guys ready to go?" Neville seemingly appeared out of thin air.
"Pretty much," Hermione smiled nervously, "we're just waiting for Professor McGonagall to give us the go ahead."
"Have you seen Ron and Harry anywhere?" Neville returned Hermione's smile, "I was hoping to head into the village with them since you two have a double date."
"They aren't coming," Kurt's tone was clinical, "I feel like as their roommate you should know this."
"They didn't tell me this," Neville protested defensively, "If anything Ron led me to believe they were still coming this morning."
"Harry forgot to get his permission slip signed and refuses to send it home to have his aunt sign it," Kurt couldn't help but be peeved at this development, "I feel like if his evil aunt is being fake nice then he should exploit it."
"Students are to leave and return through the main school entrance," Professor McGonagall instructed, "Mr Filch will check your name on the list when you leave and again when you return."
"That's not the Gryffindor thing to do," Hermione scolded, this was the second time she was telling him this but it simply didn't make sense.
"How is getting your way against the Gryffindor ethos?" Kurt held up his hands in defeat, "you know what? We're not having this fight again, I'm just going to dance on the good intentions that are paving my road to hell."
"Good morning Hermione," Anthony smiled nervously, he was able to supress his stutter with the aid of a couple of pumps from his inhaler, "How are you?"
"I'm well and yourself," Her hand moved to fiddle with her Dutch braid crown now that Kurt couldn't do anything to stop her.
"I'm okay," he nodded with a sideways jerk that Kurt suspected was a twitch, "great actually. Kurt, Finn, Neville."
"Morning Anthony," Kurt gave the boy a polite smile, "Where's y- where's Terry this morning?"
"Here I am," the boy grabbed a handful of Kurt's buttocks which made Kurt yelp in surprise, "miss me?"
"Did he just?" Finn laughed loudly, "I always said Kurt's bottom invited you to touch it but I never thought anyone would be stupid enough to try it." He let loose another round of laughter, "you are a very brave man. Let's go Neville, before we're witnesses to murder."
"I think we should get going as well," Kurt's voice hadn't quite recovered from the shock of being felt up and came out a strained whistle.
"Who do we have here?" Mr Filch looked them up and down suspiciously, "Names."
"Boot, Terrence; Goldstein, Anthony; Granger, Hermione; Hummel, Kurt Elizabeth," Anthony managed to say with minimal incidence.
Mr Filch nodded and just as soon they were on their way. A few minutes into the walk and the conversation hadn't picked up, by that Kurt meant that they were walking down the winding road in awkward silence; Kurt remembered that the whole point of him and Terry's presence was to ease situations like this.
"Hector is such a contrast from the rest of Professor Burbage's identities," Kurt said, he left the statement open ended for Hermione to pick it up.
"I know," Hermione's bulged out with sudden interest, "He's quite progressive and brash but the rest of the alternates are mild mannered conservatives."
"Maybe he's an anthropomorphism of all that she believes to be wrong and improper," Anthony suggested with a small smile.
"That's an interesting theory, I like the wording," Hermione smiled broadly, "how did you come to conceive such an interesting notion."
"His mother's a psychiatrist," Terry added with an arm slung over Anthony's shoulder.
"She really enjoys diagnosing people," Anthony gave a small smile.
Terry moved to interject once more but Kurt judged his technique to be too invasive, he grabbed the boy by the shoulders and gestured for him to hang back; Kurt handed his Burkin to Terry and bent over to fake tie his shoelaces.
"Should we wait?" Anthony asked in a low voice, "it would be no bother at all."
"Nah, Kurt's just tying his laces," Terry seemed to get Kurt's wavelength and assured his friend, "we'll catch up in next to no time."
"They'll be with us in a moment," Hermione agreed, "I want to hear more about that diagnosis your mother gave you."
And with that they separated into pairs; when Hermione and Anthony were far enough ahead, Kurt stood up and took back his bag, "touch my bottom again and I will have you hung, drawn and quartered."
"You are a feisty one," Terry chuckled boisterously.
"I'm a dangerous one and don't forget it," Kurt's laugh was smaller and controlled but much more powerful.
They walked the path toward Hogsmead village in silence, they needn't say anything to each other because they weren't on a date but rather were facilitating the means for their friends to comfortably do that which scared them more than anything. Kurt had been surprised when Terry had held the door open to a small tea shop called Madam Puddifoot's Tea shop; the place wasn't at all to Kurt's liking. The tea shop was tacky and in Kurt's opinion an establishment could only get away with being tacky if it was McDonald's and he had a suspicion that he wouldn't be gauging himself on a Big Mac today.
Kurt and Terry found a table waiting for them adjacent to the one where Hermione and Anthony were seated so that if the situation called for it they could facilitate conversation without intruding but also so they could watch and eavesdrop, they pretended to be on their own date but their curiosity won out over their better judgement.
"Good morning to the happy couple," an elderly woman smiled broadly at them, her gaze seemed to linger on Kurt for a moment but he dismissed this as simple surprise to their same sex coupling, "is it your first time out?"
"Yes," Kurt gave a small smile, he hoped it came across as sweet instead of queasy like he suspected.
She smiled back which meant that it couldn't have been that bad a smile, "What can I get you two?"
Kurt took a moment to survey the specials board, "We'll have a pot of tea and a slice of Victorian sponge for me."
"Will that be a single slice or our lovebirds sharing slice?" her smile was more suggestive than Kurt was comfortable with.
"I'll be having the chocolate cake," Terry announced which saved Kurt the trouble of finding a nice way of dismissing the woman's assumptions about their level of familiarity.
They seemed to have earned a confused stare from their waitress, "Our differences bring us closer." Kurt gave her a reassuring smile, "isn't that right Terrence?"
"Sure, whatever. Can we get the Fondue for two first though?" Kurt gave the boy that was telling, "but what makes us really special is that we skipped the 'New love' and 'honeymoon' phases and went straight for the 'couple everyone thinks should be divorced' part."
The woman didn't move but stayed routed on the spot expectantly, "We're also not here to explain why we're dating to you." It irked Kurt when people tested his boundaries, "Go get our order."
"You are a bitch and I'm kind of into it," Terry leaned forward and took Kurt's hand between his larger hands, running his thumbs over Kurt's fingers.
"What are you doing?" Kurt raised a brow but it was suggestive instead of quizzical.
"It might all be part of the act," Terry smiled devilishly, this earned him a blush from Kurt who had been caught unawares by how smooth the brash boy could be, "tell me about yourself, tell me about this ring."
Kurt looked down at the ring his father had sent him for his twelfth birthday, "It's a family thing, I inherited all my jewellery."
"Are you like some kind of aristocracy?"
The boy seemed genuinely interested so Kurt threw caution to the wind, "No, nothing like that, at least not to my knowledge. That's a tough one because after the Reign of Terror, whatever surviving aristocracy went underground so it would be difficult to be certain; they're in wine and farming."
"Wine and farming?" Terry smirked, "your family has a vineyard?"
"No, those are two separate things," Kurt laughed, "we drink and collect wine, the farm is a dairy farm."
"So what does that have to do with the rings?" Terry seemed more on the money than Kurt at this point.
"Absolutely nothing, we just all wear them," Kurt smiled as he answered, "they don't have any significance other than that my grandfather, my dad, Finn and I all wear them; it apparently goes back a couple of generations."
"That's interesting," Terry admitted as they disconnected hands to make way for the fondue pot, "it's a Neuchâteloise, I hope that's fine."
"I love all cheese in any form," Kurt looked the pot hungrily as an enticing scent wafted from the pot.
"That's great to hear," Terry smiled broadly, "I have sixth sense for these things."
"You're only saying that because you aren't in divination," Kurt scoffed, rolling his eyes at the memory of Professor Trelawney's divination lesson.
Terry guffawed loudly, "I hear Professor Trelawney is quite the piece of work."
"Isn't that the understatement of the century. I'll be mum," Kurt grabbed the plate of hard ciabatta, focaccia and crouton and piled them into the fondue, before getting to work on pouring the tea.
"I thought fondue was a dipping experience," Terry pouted.
"It can be done either way but this is how my gran does it and I learned to be a hypochondriac from her," Kurt joked, he looked up to see the corners of Terry's eyes crinkling as he laughed in uncontrolled manner Kurt was not accustomed to seeing, "I can't stand the idea of somebody double dipping. Tell me something about yourself, I feel like I'm being uncharacteristically forth coming and you need to meet me halfway. As much as I enjoy the sound of my own voice and listening to the thrilling tales of my life I want to know something I can tell Hermione in our recap"
"There isn't much to tell," the boy gave a small smile, "I'm just a boy from Cardiff."
"You ever fuck a sheep?" Kurt pursed his lips expectantly.
"No," the boy laughed loudly, grabbing his sides as he double over, "The cool kids wouldn't let me do it with them."
"That is a terrible stereotype," Kurt couldn't help laughing. Kurt gestured for Terry to grab his fondue fork, they started spearing the cheese covered nuggets of bread and transferring them onto their plates, "this allows them to cool so that you don't have to blow on them or risk scalding your mouth. Again, you wouldn't be able to use your fork on the communal cheese once it's been in your mouth."
"You took all the fun out of fondue," Terry scolded, "I can't even feed you because first I'd have to ask the waitress for a new fork."
"Or you could borrow mine," Kurt suggested with a small giggle, Kurt chose to redirect the conversation, "Cardiff, you were telling me about you."
"I honestly don't know what to say," Terry seemed to conceive the notion for a moment, "I have a younger brother?"
"I hate children," Kurt said dismissively, he realised what he was saying and decided to clarify, "I have a younger sister and I like her but she doesn't qualify as a child yet, she's barely two. Bottom line is I hate children."
Terry laughed so hard he almost choked, "What about them do you hate?"
"I just don't like disorder," Kurt shrugged, "children have this way of attracting chaos."
"They're kids," Terry laughed loudly, "they can't help it, I'm sure you were the same at that age."
"I was an angel," Kurt huffed proudly, "the most anal retentive baby of all time. Wait, how did we end up talking about me again?"
"I enjoy the sound of your voice and you have a very interesting life," Terry suggested.
Kurt's eyes narrowed, "I think the same thing which means you're deflecting."
"I was just an ordinary nerd in Cardiff, my parents were divorced and my muggle mother thought it was best if my father didn't tell us about magic till we were older; I was normal till I got my Hogwarts letter." Terry shrugged, "the coolness comes with being a Ravenclaw."
"Nobody thinks Ravenclaws are cool," Kurt shook his head and sipped at his tea, "but that just makes you like the rest of us."
"How so?" Terry raised a brow.
"A couple years ago a lot of our class were just ordinary students," Kurt's voice was reassuring, "Finn and I were just your run of the mill prepubescent Londoners."
"You're surprisingly nice," Terry gave Kurt a goofy smile, "not that I didn't think you'd be, just-"
"Not what you expected from a sadist or maybe the heir of Slytherin," Kurt's features remained schooled, his smile stayed fixed, "or am I just nice for the rumoured son of an escaped mass murderer."
"That's where I know you from!" the woman who was serving them exclaimed as she placed their desert in front of them.
"Really bitch?" Kurt hadn't intended on snapping but one doesn't plan these things, "It's not bad enough that you're eavesdropping but now you want to comment? Can we have the bill, now!"
"Calm down," Terry urged him with a reassuring smile, "there's no need for us to leave just because one waitress can't mind her own business, we're having such a good time and we can't let her ruin that."
Kurt narrowed his gaze and pursed his lips, "I thought we were supposed to chaperoning and playing wingman."
"I was always more of a bottom man," Terry gave Kurt a mildly suggestive smile, "and your bottom is a fierce piece of work."
Kurt smiled broadly whilst supressing a giggle, "and to think, this isn't a date."
~0~
"How were your dates?" Ginny slid onto the bench opposite them with Luna; the innocent curiosity in her eyes killed Kurt's initial reply, a swift reminder that they weren't friends.
"They were fine," Kurt smiled broadly as he looked over to the Ravenclaw long table to where the pair of boys were sitting, "I'm more interested in Hermione's date."
Hermione blushed brightly and Kurt could see that she wished she could bring her braided crown down over her face and disappear from existance, "It was rather enjoyable; Anthony, other than being really handsome, is quite intelligent and loquacious for a shy asthmatic. He was very well mannered, pulled out my chair and everything."
"Did you two hit it off?" Ginny was on the verge of spontaneous combustion.
"What?" Hermione looked slightly confused.
"She means did you two exchange Goisinthinian bugs?" Luna attempted to clarify but only confused everyone further.
"What they both mean is did you have chemistry?" Harry suggested as he found the red haired second year in his usual seat, "I'm assuming about the geostanan bugs."
"Eep," Ginny's gaze was fixed on Harry as he sat down beside Luna.
"It's Goisinthinian," Luna corrected with a small smile.
"Oh, sorry," Harry nodded and gave the pair a small smile as they began to shuffle, "No, it's fine, you don't have to move. As you were."
"We did have chemistry," Hermione giggle and brought her hands to cover her blush, "we seem quite simpatico, we agree on quite a bit of the school politics but there still have enough difference to create a spark of passion."
"Nerd passion," Ron scoffed, Kurt elbowed him in the ribs.
"Did you kiss him?" Kurt heard himself ask, they kind of separated after the tea house to facilitate some semblance of intimacy.
"She didn't kiss him," Harry laughed nervously, "you didn't kiss him, right?"
"She wouldn't," Ron reassured the dark haired boy, "she's much too young for that?"
"No, she's not," Kurt shook his head and gave a small shrug, "I kissed Cedric last year."
"You did what!?" Ron's eyebrows shot up to his hairline, his eyes bulged and his jaw fell open, "You… you're… but you're just a baby, how dare that git put his hands on you."
"Sometimes you're like the older brother I never wanted," Kurt huffed.
"You have an older brother," Luna pointed out, "a handsome tall one."
"No," Kurt corrected, "Finn is the older brother I did want, a cool one full of advice, who makes me look good with the parents. Ron is the over protective overbearing kind, he reacted just like my dad did."
"I thought your dad was a cool dad," Harry furrowed his brow, "He did take us to Language."
"Then the following day he tortured us when we were hung over," Kurt pointed out, "he's a devious one."
"On the subject of me and Anthony," Hermione pulled everyone's attention back to her, "I didn't kiss him but we did make plans to see each other in a more than friendly way."
Harry twitched his head slightly before speaking, "that's great."
"Hi everyone," Neville smiled brightly before turning cold, "Hermione, Kurt."
Kurt laughed because the boy was being irrationally jealous and it didn't make sense because he'd appeared to be excited and supportive of their dates this morning, then it hit Kurt, "Finn talked you into petty jealousy?"
"I don't know how but he managed it," Neville shook his head in defeat, "He managed to even make me jealous of your date with Terry."
"He's good that way," Kurt looked across the Great Hall for Finn but his gaze met with Cedric's, he didn't hold it.
"Speaking of," Luna smiled devilishly at him, it looked so wrong and so right on her.
"My date was okay," Kurt shrugged as he tried to think of a stand out detail that he could share without raising protests again, "not much to tell."
"Kurt doesn't want to tell you about the hand holding, the fondue or the way they were smiling at each other as if they were seeing each other for the first time," Hermione surprised him by how observant she had managed to be whilst on a date of her own.
"Kurt had a facial expression other than his bitch face?" Ron exclaimed, "you must really like this boy."
Ginny's face lit up but when she spoke all that came out was "eep."
"I think there's no question of chemistry here," Ron shot daggers at the pair Ravenclaw boys as if they had tracked mud onto his Persian rug.
"Are you guys Kerry?" Neville sulked, "that's the cutest couple name ever."
"No," Kurt smiled reassuringly at Neville, "Terry and I decided that it was in our best interest to regress to acquaintanceship and possibly spring board to friendship."
"Why?" Hermione whined, "I'm not getting the deposit back on the Kerry jelly bracelets I made."
"Terry's Heterosexuality was an obstacle we simply couldn't overcome," Kurt spoke flatly.
"He's straight?" Hermione choked lightly on her beverage, "what was he doing looking at you like that?"
"He was seeing me for the first time," Kurt smiled for a moment before schooling his features, "I always tell you that I'm the nicest person I know and he was discovering that; I was just really glad to find someone who enjoyed hearing me talk about myself as much as I do."
"I feel like you know us," Neville grumbled, "we're way nicer."
"I'm impartially nice," Kurt smirked, "people just earn my ire more readily."
"Funny because most of the student body thinks you're a bitch," then realisation dawned on Hermione, "hence the seeing you for the first time."
"Hermione gets it," Kurt smiled broadly, it was always so refreshing to see how much Hermione got him and how well they meshed, "besides."
"Besides?" Luna's eyes glowed in bewilderment and curiosity.
"Kurt has his sights set elsewhere," Hermione smiled suggestively at him.
Ron's eyes narrowed and his face darkened, "I think he's too old for you."
Hope you all like it.